The Fosters Episode 212 Recap: The Great Wall of Body Pillows
Lena and Stef’s gaggle of children make it impossible for them to get their scissor on. Again.
Glee Episode 603 Recap: To Infinity And Beyond
Brittany and Santana are going to the chapel, y’all. They’re gonna get married!
Pretty Little Liars Episode 515 Recap: Eat Around The Hair
Emily comes unspooled in the most flawless way possible, and with empanadas.
Salem Episodes 11 and 12 Recap: Judge, Jury, and Executioner
Tituba’s stuck in a torture chamber and John has been arrested for witchcraft! Puritanical terror has descended upon Salem! So much cliffhanger.
Glee Episode 602 Recap: Homo-coming
Everybody comes back to help us forget everything that happened while they were gone, like heterosexuality!
Glee Episode 601 Recap: Oh, Look at That. I’ve Been Impaled.
It’s the final season of Glee! Hold onto your butts!
Pretty Little Liars Episode 514 Recap: The Long Goodbye
If you say it out loud — if you say, “I’m gay” — the whole world is gonna change.
Salem Episodes 9 and 10 Recap: Free Tituba!
So I know we all watch this show because of Ashley Madekwe’s portrayal of Tituba. And the next two episodes feature this character quite a bit. But holy shit, be ready for a roller coaster of emotions, because Tituba becomes a prisoner of a white bible-thumping, colonial witch hunter.
Salem Episodes 7 and 8 Recap: F*ck Colonialism
Maybe girl-on-girl action is like the antenna that boosts magical Wi-Fi. (That was an alcohol-inspired thought.)
Boob(s On Your) Tube: Hart Of Dixie Brings Back Cricket The Lesbian
And after way too much sausage talk, Melissa King makes it to the top five on Top Chef.
Boob(s On Your) Tube: Bisexual Declarations On Chasing Life, 69 Shenanigans on Marry Me
Also, Jane the Virgin introduced a lesbian subplot we’ve never seen before.
Salem Episodes 5 and 6 Recap: Holy Homoerotic Femdom
Say some Hail Marys and make a sign of the cross, because these episodes are a hot, sexy mess. If you’ve been hanging in there and waiting for some extra-flamey gay witch action, then these episodes are for you.
Pretty Little Liars Episode 514 Recap: The Ghost of Christmas Cataclysm
Lesbian mistletoe smooches, omniscient death threats, and the return of Mona Vanderwaal!
The Fosters Episode 211 Recap: Cotton-Headed Ninnymoggins
Stef almost Stefs-up Christmas, but Lena swoops in to save the day.
Boob(s on your) Tube: Everything’s Coming Up Soft Butch Lipstick Flannel Queen
Plus it’s finally time for ABC Family’s leztastic Christmas specials!
Salem Episodes 3 and 4 Recap: Dude, Where’s My Skin
“Creepy doll teleports itself onto her bed and slowly turns its head. Clearly, Anne is made of braver stuff than I, because this is the moment I would’ve set the entire house on fire.”
Transparent Episode 110 Recap: Would You Even Talk To Me
The season finale of Transparent!
Faking It Episode 210 Recap: I Was Happy Just To Share A Cardboard Castle With You
For the mid-season finale of “Faking It,” we go to jail with Julie Goldman, which is basically my dream date.
Grey’s Anatomy Recap Episodes 1107-1108: You’re Gonna Miss Me When I’m Gone
It’s the episode where instead of having sex Callie and Arizona have an emotional conversation in a quiet section of the hospital. Holy shit, aren’t you excited? This is life mimicking art, y’all.
Transparent Episode 109 Recap: I Want You To Be Here
In which we get a dozen different emotions for the price of one.