The Comment Awards Are Sick of Eating Easter Candy and Matzo

The problem with seasonal food is you always end up with too much of a good thing. I rejoice at the sight of the year’s first egg-shaped Reese’s cup, but by the 15th I mostly just want to vomit. Because we’re sure you’re probably feeling the same way about the traditional food of the holiday of your choice/family/tradition, we’ve got two recipes to change things up: cucumber tomato salad for those of you who need a break from chocolate city and Matzo pizza for the Jewish among yeh. Rachel, on the other hand, seems to have a high tolerance for repetition and thus created this playlist of covers of Jolene. Can you blame her? That is a great song. Grace also made you guys a playlist and its theme is Harry Potter. Because we’re still globe-hopping, we had tour guides take you trough Manhattan, Boston and Savannah this week. We also had plenty of sexy in the form of a NSFW curvy femme gallery, an interview with sinclair sexsmith and five videos of Megan Rapinoe. In the video department, we had episode 5 of The Newtown Girls and the premiere of my favorite new webseries, No Man’s Land. Riese read a lot more things, Whitney called out stereotypes, Lizz interviewed Valerie Weiss and we counted down 15 Women’s magazines that don’t suck. Finally we celebrated camp by talking about Dina’s newly-discovered privilege, how to start a fire, Robin’s memories of camp and 10 great movies about camp.


On Playlist: Yer Listening to Wizard Rock, Harry:

The I Want Your Childhood Award to novastar: “I went with my middle school girlfriend to a Harry and the Potters show at a library and we made out and it was totally awesome.”

On On 20/20, Trans Beauty Queen Jenna Talackova Enlightens Barbara Walters, Your Family:

The True Facts Award to bookbound: “well “Donald Trump” is an anagram for “Tampon L. Rudd”, so maybe Don oughta be answering some serious questions about his period issues and whether he’s Paul Rudd’s secret father. personally I think his hair is either a wig, or a sentient keratin-based symbiotic alien that lives off of the brainwaves of stupid people combined with the smell of money.”

The But Won Her Interpretive Dance Card… Award to Digger: “Barbara Walters surrendered her journalistic integrity card years ago when she asked Katherine Hepburn: “If you were a tree, what kind would you be?””

On Gay Families Attend White House Easter Egg Roll Hoping for Eggs, Workplace Protection Executive Order:

The Best Comment On a Lesbian Website Ever Award to Becca: “And I keep scrolling and scrolling and scrolling, trying to get to the real comments…
but I am loving the weiners.”

The True Meaning of Easter Award to do rah: “As an asexual and celibate being, I find all types of sexuality disgusting and offensive, as well as your strange tradition of gathering non fertile poultry eggs in the name of an ancient zombie hippie man.”

On Get Baked: Matzo Pizza:

The Placentphagy Award to Emma: “OMG Fetal cheese hahahaha. grossest typo ever. on another note this looks yummy.”

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Laura is a tiny girl who wishes she were a superhero. She likes talking to her grandma on the phone and making things with her hands. Strengths include an impressive knowledge of Harry Potter, the ability to apply sociology to everything under the sun, and a knack for haggling for groceries in Spanish. Weaknesses: Chick-fil-a, her triceps, girls in glasses, and the subjunctive mood. Follow the vagabond adventures of Laura and her bike on twitter [@laurrrrita].

Laura has written 308 articles for us.

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