Lesbian sex: it’s a thing we have, but it’s also a thing we watch other people have on a screen! We love a good lesbian sex scene. These formative cinematic experiences have helped make us the gay sexual creatures we are today.
I solicited hot lesbian sex scene tips on twitter (h/t to Andrea Long Chu for the signal boost) and combined that input with my own personal opinion, which includes the opinion that Elena Undone is a bad movie and nobody should have to watch it for any reason AND the opinion that the HBO biopic Gia made me gay.
This is not a comprehensive list, and only represents films available to stream. I imagine if you’re here with me today reading this, you’re probably not looking for recommendations on DVDs to mail-order. Just a hunch!
Kinky Lesbian Sex
Bound (1996)
Directed & Written By: Lana Wachowski & Lilly Wachowski
Lana and Lilly were fans of sex-positive guru Susie Bright’s Lesbian Sex World, so they sent her a package in the early ’90s that contained a draft of Bound, asking if she’d honor them with a cameo. (Lana and Lilly are sisters and trans women, at the time that this film was made, they were still presenting as male.) It wasn’t an unusual request or one that particularly interested her, but she was impressed by the studio they were associated with and thus sat down to read the script. She fell in love with it immediately and agreed to the cameo but also offered them a different type of support: “If you don’t think I’m too presumptuous, could I be your lesbian-sex consultant?,” she wrote. “I notice that whenever two lovers fall into an embrace, it doesn’t say exactly what happens next. On behalf of every moviegoer who can’t live through another syrupy, comb all lesbian love scene, could I please, please, please give you my words of advice on what two women like this would do in bed together?” They said yes, and she did, and holy shit did that decision pay off!
The Duke of Burgundy (2015)
Directed & Written by: Peter Strickland
The Duke of Burgundy involves an extensive, drawn-out dom/sub (and sometimes master/slave) relationship between an lepidopterist (somebody who studies butterflies) and the maid she brings into her home who has a lot of very kinky desires. It’s a very… unique film? Also, there’s no actual nudity but the lingerie they’re wearing is so hot that it sort of compensates for itself.
Professor Marston & The Wonder Women (2017)
Directed & Written by: Angela Robinson
If you don’t want any men in your sex scenes, this isn’t the film for you. But if that element doesn’t turn you off, you’re in for a lesbian-written-and-directed DELIGHT. This movie is hot and kinky as hell and makes you feel like it’s okay to want what you want and it will probably inspire you to go out there and get what you want without shame or inhibition.
The Handmaiden (2016)
Directed by: Chan-wook Park
Written by: Chan-wook Park and Seo-Kyung Chung, adapted from Fingersmith, by Sarah Waters
A beautiful, thrilling, meticulously plotted film; sumptuous and precise and erotically charged throughout. I could watch it ten times and it wouldn’t be enough but nothing will ever beat that first twisty time. Pajaba called it “the lesbian gothic psychosexual romantic thriller of our dreams.” Teo Bugbee at MTV called it “a film dedicated to getting off on the creative potential of sexuality, and by grounding that open exploration of desire in a story where two women find freedom through each other.”
Wow Just a Lot of Lesbian Sex Happening
Blue Is the Warmest Color (2013)
Directed By: Abdel Kechiche
Written By: Julie Maroh, Ghalya Lacroix, and Abdel Kechiche
Clocking in with modern cinema’s longest lesbian sex scene, Blue is the Warmest Color divided the lesbian community into camps who felt it was entirely informed by the male gaze and those who felt it was incredible and also very hot. Blue is the Warmest Color has it all: strap-on fucking, 69’ing, scissoring, spaghetti-eating. Do people really 69 as much as they do in lesbian movies directed by men? Asking for a friend!
Concussion (2013)
Directed & Written By: Stacie Passon
After a concussion, a lesbian mom decides to become a sex worker who only sees women clients, leading to a bunch of small trysts and one complicated affair. Once upon a time I was feeling not particularly sexual but knew sex was on the agenda for that evening so I turned off all the lights and watched this movie with as much devoted attention as I possibly could muster and you know what, it worked!
Duck Butter (2018)
Directed by: Miguel Arteta
Written by: Miguel Arteta, Alia Shawkat
In her review, Heather Hogan wrote that the sex scenes, “which feel real and are not male gaze-y in any way,” were a highlight of this recent release, which sees Naima (Shawkat), a struggling actor in Los Angeles; and Sergio (Laia Costa); meet at a club and hook up and decide to spend a sleepless 24 hours together, having sex once an hour.
Room in Rome (2010)
Written & Directed by: Julio Medem
This is a terrible film you should probably watch on drugs. It’s also a film composed almost entirely of lesbian sex scenes and the two women involved in those scenes having conversations about their feelings and childhood trauma.
Below Her Mouth (2017)
Directed By: April Mullen
Written By: Stephanie Fabrizi
“One thing is clear about Below Her Mouth,” wrote Erin Sullivan in her minimally-starred review of Below Her Mouth, “its creators were committed to pulling off a realistic portrayal of what sex between two women can really look like for a mainstream audience. And they did! They did it so much. I’m talking a lot.” There are so many locations within a disaffected brooding artist’s loft/truck to fuck in, you know? And they do. They sure do so much!
Better Than Chocolate (1999)
Directed by: Anne Wheeler
Written by: Peggy Thompson
I’m sorry everybody but this is a mediocre film and the sex scenes give me chronic internalized homophobia but so many of you brought this up on twitter that I felt obligated to include it. It was, for its time, pretty wonderful. It does have, to its credit, a lot of sexual content — we’ve got a sex toy collector, we’ve got bodypaint sex, we’ve got shower sex, we’ve got bathroom sex complete with a line of lesbians (patiently??!) waiting to use the bathroom where sex is being had, we’ve got a Mom discovering sex toys! So much sex! Good on everybody involved in this seminal film for having sex!
Romantic Lesbian Sex
Kiss Me / Kyss Mig (2011)
Directed By: Alexandra-Therese Keining, Therese Keining
Written By: Alexandra-Therese Keining
One way to check if you’re really falling in love or not is to have sex. Just ask these two ladies who are about to become step-sisters! It’s complicated, sure, but any lesbian could tell you that complicated is just another word for “irresistibly hot.”
I Can’t Think Straight (2008)
Directed by: Shamim Sarif
Written by: Shamim Shaif, Kelly Moss
This film is a tale of what happens when two very attractive women sustain intense amounts of sexual tension for a series of minutes, breaking every now and then to release that tension through sex scenes. Erin loved it!
Stud Life (2012)
Written & Directed By: Campbell Ex
In her review on Pride.com, Kat Blaque called Stud Life “painfully slow” and didn’t really buy into the relationship at the story’s center — but gave it props for authenticity and for depicting SEX between two Black women, which is unfortunately rare in lesbian film.
Summertime / La Belle Saison (2016) (France)
Directed by: Catherine Corsini
Written by: Catherine Corsini & Laurette Polmanss
The poster for this film is not lying to you. The two women at the center of this story set in 1971 — about a young woman from the French countryside who moves to Paris to get away from her parents, where she falls in with a group of politically engaged feminists and falls in love with their leader Carol — do indeed spend a lot of time naked. They even have great French countryside sex!
There’s Only One Sex Scene But It Sure Is Hot!
Atomic Blonde (2017)
Directed By: David Leitch
Written By: Kurt Johnstad
My jaw dropped right there in the movie theater when this sex scene began because it was so hot and so real and there it was in a mainstream movie! “Honestly I really thought Atomic Blonde was the best I’ve ever seen,” wrote @nollers on twitter, “which sounds ridiculous because the scenes are so short, but the heat felt real and the progression felt natural and sincere. It was so passionate and honestly, I’m a sucker for the little bit of danger.”
Chloe (2010)
Directed by: Atom Egoyan
Written by: Erin Cressida Wilson
An erotic thriller that sees Catherine (Julianne Moore) hiring Chloe (Amanda Seyfried) to attempt to seduce her husband but, of course, we know how these things go — she finds Chloe’s descriptions of hooking up with her husband to be kinda hot and before you know it the two ladies have a romp of their own. Can you endure the entire ridiculous film for three minutes of Julianne Moore and Amanda Seyfried having lesbian sex? There’s only one way to find out!
There’s Only One Sex Scene But It Sure Is Exciting!
Disobedience (2018)
Directed by: Sebastián Lelio
Written by: Sebastián Lelio and Rebecca Lenkiewicz, based on the novel by Naomi Alderman
The first thing anybody ever learned about Disobedience was that it included a lesbian sex scene involving somebody spitting into somebody else’s mouth. “All the wetness, the spitting in the mouth, the pubic hair, the vaginas, but also leaving some of it to the audience to imagine,” said Rachel Weisz to Heather Hogan on the actual telephone, regarding this 6-minute sex scene. “Where is the other woman’s mouth, where are her fingers? It was important for him to focus on our faces to really capture that desire. There’s something very spiritual about their sex. I’m really proud of it.”
Carol (2015)
Directed by: Todd Haynes
Written by: Phyllis Nagy, based on the novel by Patricia Highsmith
Have you heard of this movie? There’s a very nice May/December lesbian romance that eventually consummates itself.
Saving Face (2005)
Directed By: Alice Wu
Written By: Alice Wu
Coming in at #3 on our 100 Best Lesbian Movies of All Time list, Saving Face‘s sex scene is also brief, but it’s such a rewarding and joyful sexual experience for the characters, who are by the way naked.
Gia (1997)
Directed By: Michael Cristofer
Written By: Jay McInerney, Michael Cristofer
An erotically-charged photoshoot involving lesbian groping through a chain-link fence, followed by intense lesbian sex, followed by and also honestly proceeded by a lot of “Angelina Jolie with her shirt off.” There’s a lot of physical intimacy with her on-again-off-again girlfriend in this film, which is ultimately a tragic, heartbreaking story, based on a heartbreaking real life.
The Carmilla Movie (2017)
Directed By: Spencer Maybee
Written By: Alejandro Alcoba and Jordan Hall
The two women in question shed their period outfits before settling into a solid five minutes or so of lesbian sex, executed with loving, genuine detail. Bonus points for setting it to Uh Huh Her, my own personal Sex Soundtrack of 2007.
Becks (2017)
Directed By: Daniel Powell & Elizabeth Rohrbaugh
Written By: Daniel Powell, Elizabeth Rohrbaugh & Rebecca Drysdale
Hayley Kiyoko is in this movie, but she’s not in this sex scene. Just so you know. I can’t tell you why she’s not in it because that would be a spoiler. But the women in this sex scene are named Mena Suvari, who perhaps you have heard of, and Lena Hall, who you have now officially heard of.
There’s Only One Sex Scene But It Sure Is Revelatory!
Desert Hearts (1985)
Directed By: Robert Louis Stevenson, Donna Deitch
Written By: Jane Rule, Natalie Cooper
Desert Hearts features the first lesbian sex scene in a lesbian-made movie to get a major theatrical release.
But I’m a Cheerleader (1999)
Directed by: Jamie Babbit
Written by: Brian Wayne Peterson and Jamie Babbit
This entire film was notoriously de-sexed in order to avoid an NC-17 rating, but the tender, softly soundtracked furtive sex scene between Graham and Megan at conversion camp holds a special place in our hearts. “But I’m a Cheerleader’s sex scene didn’t make me gay,” wrote @DeepLezPower on twitter, “but it definitely helped.”
Princess Cyd (2017)
Directed by: Stephen Cone
Written by: Stephen Cone
The scene is short, but it’s sweaty and sweet and touching and revelatory, too. Plus our very own Ro White is in it! That’s them in the picture!
Obviously not every great moment in cinematic lesbian sex was included here, which means I bet you’ll have some to add in the comments! FYI, The Incredibly True Adventures of Two Girls in Love and If These Walls Could Talk 2 are not available on Netflix, Amazon or Hulu, so they are not included here.
I’ve never excitedly asked a friend if they fucked cause if my friends want to tell me they will on their own, but if I ever do I’m going to ask if they made contact with the operative
i watched Duck Butter last night. I’m glad I watched it, some of it was sexy, but jeez am I glad that’s over. cross this bad boy of my to do list
I had completely forgotten about Chloe until just now so I’m gonna go out on a limb and say it’s not worth watching except for those 3 minutes.
I watched Bound, Gia, and But I’m A Cheerleader on repeat in college. And High Art but I can’t remember if that one has an actual sex scene and also it’s a super depressing movie.
I’m afraid I’m going to henceforth be referring to my own, personal sexual experiences in the above mentioned categories.
Thank you, Riese!
Pep it up further by referring to your girlfriend by her Girl Scout Cookie.
“I had ‘Romantic Lesbian Sex’ with a ‘Lemonade’.”
Kristana, I’m German. I have no idea what that means.
Ice cream flavors could work, though.
It’s just a reference to an older article.
Hi
Room in Rome is wonderful
The only compliment I will ever Below Her Mouth is that I thought the sex scenes were good. The filmmakers should have just made a porn with all the bad acting that took place in that movie.
I’ve actually seen better acting (and writing) in porn. But yeah, the sex was hot so at least they did one thing right.
“I’ve seen better acting in porn” ROFL what a Rotten Tomatoes review that would be
I have been trying to sell this movie this exact way, it’s such a great porn, in comparison to an awful movie.
I forget where I saw a review for it, but one site told me Elena Undone had a sex scene worth watching so I did. Plus, my other options were to re-watch girltrash all night long, my summer of love, and a few others that I had seen. Yeah, that movie was pretty terrible, with an okay sex scene.
Side note, in some countries, Kiss Me is called With Every Heartbeat(I think that’s the English title) and in the first paragraph on their wiki page is a link to an autostraddle list “8 Pretty Great Lesbian Movies You Haven’t Seen Yet.” I don’t remember the sex scene, but thought it was a good movie.
Many people describe Carol/Therese relationship as May/December romance but it seems a little off to me. Carol is in her mid-thirties and Therese is 20 in the film. Cate Blanchett was 46 and Rooney Mara was 30 when Carol was released.
So, May/September maybe?
I wouldn’t classify The Handmaiden as kinky sex. They didn’t really do anything that involved kink, even though Hideko was involved in kinky scenes elsewhere in the film.
yeah but there was so much kink in the film in general that i felt it belonged in that category.
The Handmaiden is such a good film! ugh
The best thing about “Better Than Chocolate” was the love song/musical number to Julie Christie..”Julie Christie! She makes me go misty!!” Can’t hate a film with a lesbian love song about Julie Christie..
Agreed. All the dance numbers are entertaining.
This was fun nineties movie. I mean, when the mom finds the box of toys under the bed, what’s not to love.
Not only is Kiss Me a pretty good movie, but it also has my favorite Robyn song in it. So, bonus.
Love The Carmilla Movie, Saving Face, Better Than Chocolate, and I Can’t Think Straight.
But I’m A Cheerleader will always hold a special place in my heart because it was the first lesbian movie I saw. The music used for the love scene is beyond beautiful.
Thank you for mentioning If These Walls Could Talk 2 (and its unavailability). The 1970s segment is 100% responsible for my self realization. :)
To my fellow Canada residents, we’ve got Duck Butter, Carol, and Princess Cyd on Netflix.
“I’m sorry everybody but this is a mediocre film and the sex scenes give me chronic internalized homophobia” OMG I love you.
why do all yall gotta make me feel bad for loving Room in Rome? ?
just finished duck butter and now i’m onto princess cyd… WHAT A PERFECT NIGHT, thanks for these recos.
Good list
Maybe it’s because I don’t have much contact with the community these days but is there a reason most of these actors look like straight women to me?
My wife and I saw your comment together. She agreed that “Any time I see two women with blow-outs I’m like ‘no'”. And I (the less feminine of the two of us) claimed “No! What? That happens! Sure it does!” And then it turns out I have no idea what a blow-out is.
That’s another one that’s lost on me too. A “blow out”, where I’m from, used to mean having had too much to eat.
I should probably just not comment. Still most of those women look like the young mothers (with husbands) in my street.
dont buy into queer femme-invisibility!
*as an aside i think the mainstream cis-het world is less comfortable with gender-bending (whether thats a woman who is MOC or a nonbinary person who is androgynous or a transfemme person, etc) so that could also contribute to the decision to have two cis-femme of center folks as the focus of these scenes.
You’re right l think, on reflection. Maybe the world’ll grow up eventually.
I love Kiss Me! It’s a cute movie and I think Swedish is the most adorable sounding language
Thanks, Riese!
I watched The Duke of Burgundy last night because of this list and really enjoyed it for what it is. Really interesting storytelling, also loved the costumes, soundtrack, and filming.
FYI- it’s on Hulu if you have it
Why does nobody ever talk about A Perfect Ending? That movie had lots of sex.
mmm yeah you’re right, that was on an earlier draft of this list when i had a whole may/december category but then … idk what happened somehow i missed it for the final one
I’m here to tell you that drugs didn’t help the train wreck that is Room in Rome.
“Do people really 69 as much as they do in lesbian movies directed by men? Asking for a friend!” Umm… yes??
(But definitely not so much scissoring. And definitely not so much butt-sex-after-all-that-spaghetti.)
I love this list, but one movie on this list that I absolutely DESPISE is The Duke of Burgundy. When I first watched it, I was excited to see a kinky lesbian story, but what I ended up watching was a sad story of an abusive relationship. The abusive nature of the relationship is not related to the bdsm at all. But, rather, the abuse is found in the way one party selfishly only thinks about her own happiness, while completely ignoring any wants the other party has. The abused partner ends up feeling like she has to squish down all her own needs into nothing, and live to please her partner, and somehow she’s never quite good enough… It was absolutely chilling to watch, and not in a good way.
The ending was very unsatisfying and not at all what I was hoping for.