Hey lovebugs. Did you have an excellent Thanksgiving? Mine involved lots of carbohydrates, wine, and card playing, which are three of my favorite things. What are you doing today? Are you shopping? Are you fending off masses of people at your retail job? Are you eating leftovers? No matter what you’re doing, you should consider taking a moment to revisit our posts this week and take a gander at the wit and wisdom of our commenters. We had a Thanksgiving open thread so that we could all be together at Autostraddle. Since yesterday was the start of the holiday season, we’re rolling out gift guides and advice to get you through it. We discussed DSLR cameras and nerdy gifts, and put the 2012 Autostraddle calendar on sale so that you can get one for each of your friends and lovers. Lizz taught you how to buy a blazer since everyone needs a good blazer for winter soirees, Sarah lit adult beverages on fire, and recently de-veganized Carolyn cooked a delicious-looking maple balsamic chicken. Our televisionary team took on the AMAs, half hour comedies, Two Broke Girls, and Twilight and as always brought you the caption contest. We shared stories on the transgender day of remembrance , Crystal kept you calm, Riese linked to things she’s read and loved, and Katrina made a list of weird things people ask her. Now here is the Group of the Week:
Hello did you need a place where you could share your tumblr, find other ‘straddlers to follow and bitch about tumblr downtime? This is that group. Go ahead and plug your shit.
On Dr. Keith Ablow Calls Out Benetton For Trying to Ruin World Via Gay Sex:
The So Inappropriate But So LOL Award to roszs: “Interesting to see that Benetton have withdrawn the advert showing the Pope kissing the muslim Imam, under pressure from the Vatican. Maybe they will replace it with something the Vatican finds more acceptable, like a priest molesting a sobbing child…”
On NOM Is Basically Just Making Shit Up At This Point:
The Ask Lizz About MOM Award to Jeana: “first glance read this as “MOM is basically just making shit up at this point” and I was like, “How many times have I said this EXACT sentence?” Also: EMERGENCY ALERT. Haha. redundant and dumb and what the fuck NOM!”
On Occupy Movie Theaters: Breaking Dawn Part One:
The Eww Award to Evidux: “I can’t wait for this awful franchise to fucking die already. It’s the literary equivalent of fermented cat vomit.”
The Beggars Can Be Choosers Award to Christine: “So my friends and I snuck into the theatre to see Immortals, which was supposed to be playing at 12:15. When we got in though, we realized that all of the theatres were playing twilight instead. All 12 theatres. Every. One. We went home.
…
We could have seen twilight for free but we didn’t because it was twilight.”
The HP Award for Emily Choo to Ella: “[Runs into theater]
Harry Potter forever! Dumbledore’s Army! WOOO!
[Runs out]”
On Get Toasted: Flaming Cinnamon Martini:
The Your Face Award to Marika: “YOUR MOM IS A FLAMING CINNAMON MARTINI”
On What Do You Wish You Learned In Sex Ed?:
The CSI Award to Paloma: “And it’s not like you will be checking bacteria before sleeping with someone.
(“Jeeves! Fetch me my microscope, I am about to have intercourse!”)”
The You Should Have Said Cunt Award to Hobbled: “When I took sex ed in the 8th grade our teacher would only refer to a vagina as a “front bum” when I put up my hand and said “can you stop saying front bum? You’re kinda ruining vaginas for me” I got sent to the office for cursing. So yeah sex ed for me would have been better if my teacher did not have the mentality of a 7 year old when it came to the subject.”
The The More You Know Award to Rie: “In my Catholic high school, we had a program called Not Me, Not Now. Its approach is that we were too EMPOWERED and INTELLIGENT to have premarital sex.
As far as approaches to abstinance-only education go, there are worse ones.
Little 16-year-old Rie is in class, taught by a parent volunteer. She asks us for good reasons not to have premarital sex.
I raise my hand.
“Yes Marie?”
“Only 30% of women have vaginal orgasms via penetrative sex.”*
She never called on me again. I can’t imagine why.
*this was the statistic I’d heard at the time, YMMV”
this is meta
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