1. Is this a restaurant?
2. What do you have here that’s free?
3. Does the vegan quesadilla have meat?
4. Can I get a cocktail…but with the alcohol on the side?
5. Can I get an extra side of Guacamala?
6. So, the bacon/cheddar burger…cheddar, like, cheese?
7. Is the basil tofu free range?
8. How is your chicken poonani?
9. What is your favorite hot poonani?
10. So the side of fries, can we get that, but instead of fries, can we get cottage cheese?
11. Can you tell me who this gentleman is? [pointing to picture of Gandhi on our menu]
12. Shut up, Vanessa, I don’t need your help anymore.
13. Why are you crying?
14. Where am I supposed to put my baby?
15. Will you hold our table while we go smoke a blunt?
16. DOES LANGSTON HUGHES STILL WORK HERE?
Before you go! It takes funding to keep this publication by and for queer women and trans people of all genders running every day. And A+ members keep the majority of our site free for everyone. Still, 99.9% of our readers are not members. A+ membership starts at just $4/month. If you’re able to, will you join A+ and keep Autostraddle here and working for everyone?