Your Completely Queer Guide To Horoscope Hookups

pisces_300x300PISCES (February 18 – March 20) As a Pisces, you’re a 24/7 feelings party. Incredibly empathetic, you tend to carry everyone else’s burdens for them, in addition to your own, whether you are dating them or not. You’re always trying to find yourself, and you might often find yourself in someone else’s arms because when you crush, you crush hard and frequently. You have a tendency to see the best in people and get caught up in the fantastical version of reality, which means a shit relationship for you might still look like sunshine and daisies. Because of all your feelings, you’re a super caring partner whose loving nature is always attractive.

U-Haul Material – Leo, Virgo, Scorpio, Sagittarius, Pisces

Explosive Fingerblasting Chemistry – Taurus, Cancer, Capricorn

Beware of Trainwreck – Libra

Best Lesbros Forever – Aries, Gemini

PISCES and ARIES You know those two queers who started out fucking but are now the best of friends? That’s Aries and Pisces. They probably hooked up a few times and it was totally fantastic, but there’s no way they could do a real relationship. The connection between them is life-changing and deep, and as friends they are bosom buddies. Pisces is the compassionate sidekick to Aries’ rough rider ways, and they balance each other perfectly when they’re out on the town trying to pick up girls. As lovers? Not really. Pisces idealizes Aries, and Aries will walk all over Pisces without realizing it. Aries won’t respect Pisces as a longterm partner, but they will respect Pisces as a friend. This is one of those things where you know you need to keep the person in your life, but not necessarily in your privates.

PISCES and TAURUS Opposites attract, and dreamy Pisces will probably see a total hunk in the strong and quiet Taurus. Pisces lives in a sensual world already, and Taurus has no problem taking them to another level of passion with their earthy love of worshiping the body. Of course, Pisces has a tendency to idealize, and Taurus’ quiet nature will make it easy for Pisces to fill in the gaps, sometimes incorrectly. There’s a deep tantric connection here, but if they want to make it in the big leagues, they’ll need to tone down the fantasies that drive their relationship.

PISCES and GEMINI Gemini loves to understand new things, and Pisces intuitively understands their peers. They’re both open-minded and interested in new ways of thinking and living, and when their minds get together, super dreamy Pisces has way too much fun with the elevated brain of Gemini. While there isn’t a lot of spark or chemistry here, there is a quiet understanding of each other that allows them to do just about anything together and be perfectly content. Painting each other’s nails and talking about abstract theory is everything these two want in a bestie.

PISCES and CANCER There’s an immediate sense of intimacy when Cancer and Pisces cross paths. Cancer can’t help but fall hard for Pisces’ sympathetic nature, and Pisces loves that Cancer has a soulful side. The bond between them is ridiculously strong, and with two water signs suddenly embracing, it’s the kind of sex that you sob tears of joy over. Cancer is ready to settle down, though, and Pisces is still always on that journey towards themselves, always living in a dreamscape just out of reach, so there is a bit of tension in their goals for each other. If it turns to a lifelong love, it’ll be all the stronger, but it might be that their differences are just enough to make them appreciate the glorious sex on its own.

PISCES and LEO Leo is crazy about Pisces from the first time they meet. Pisces are always dreamy, and Leo can’t help but fall head over heels for the dreamiest babe at the zine festival. Leo is in love with love itself, and Pisces brings out their romantic side, with Leo pulling out all the big stops to get Pisces on their level. Of course, Pisces’ dreaminess is not shallow, and their natural intuition makes them find and adore all the parts of Leo that Leo’s prone to keeping to themselves, a little gesture that Leo and their ego find irresistible. Fire and water mean the chemistry is crazy good, and the bedroom is a place for mutual admiration as much as sexual Olympics. Pisces tones down Leo’s larger than life side and keeps them from overdoing themselves, and Leo gets Pisces out from the inner journey and gets them excited about the world around them. They’re sweethearts from the start, and it doesn’t look to end any time soon.

PISCES and VIRGO These two have a deep and consuming love for one another. They are on very similar emotional levels, and there might be a few tears of joys following their sex lives. Pisces has an intense sympathy and emotional intuition that lets them tap into all of sensitive Virgo’s needs. And since Pisces is prone to forgetting to take care of themselves in order to do the same for someone else, Virgo’s impulse to nurture means that Pisces is always taken care of. It’s the perfect balance for two people who live to find love.

PISCES and LIBRA It’s hot between these two from the first, with Libra wanting to explore all of Pisces’ inner fantasies, and Pisces positively swooning over the professional charmer. There is an innate fascination with one another that comes from a mutual love for beauty and a keen sense of aesthetic. They’ll immediately want to figure each other’s nuances and points of pleasure, and it will make for some sexy situations. At the same time, they have to be careful of their differences; Libra’s rigid sense of right and wrong doesn’t blend well with Pisces’ tendency to see the love in everyone, and fights will be devastating for sensitive Pisces, who feels much deeper than Libra’s ability to turn the emotions off when needed. Tread carefully but love hard.

PISCES and SCORPIO These two innately understand each other from the first. Both are deep and intense people, though in very different ways. Pisces lives in the world of possibility while also feeling things intensely. Scorpio is obsessed with the here and now and approaches the present with everything they have. The bond between them will be equally heavy, and both are forgiving of their tendency to withdraw into themselves, as Pisces does like to live in dreams, and Scorpio is always retreating into their secrets. They feel intense love for one another because they don’t know how to feel anything but intensity, so even if this intensity overcomes them, it was a romance for the ages.

PISCES and SAGITTARIUS Dreamy Pisces and philosophical Sagittarius may end up in their headspace a lot, but it’s pretty sexy up there. They’re content to have brunch in bed and think about deep fantastical thoughts together, or meet up at a museum and make out under some Greek art. Pisces is more than okay with Sagittarius’ somewhat aloof side, and Sagittarius keeps coming back for more of Pisces’ alluring depths. Since Sagittarius isn’t one to sit in their feelings, Pisces’ extrasensitivity may be just what the archer ordered when it comes to addressing their usually ignored needs. They’re big on traveling and seeking out new and interesting things, which means this is the couple whose suitcase you should be stowing away in stat.

PISCES and CAPRICORN Their friends think this might be the worst idea ever, with Capricorn obsessed with their detailed calendar and getting a promotion, and Pisces wandering from one job to the next, head seemingly in the clouds, but somehow this works in the bedroom in ways no one had expected. Pisces wants to show Capricorn that exploring new things can be extra fun, and Capricorn finds that the best way to ground Pisces in the present is to give them a physical experience that won’t let them do anything but live in the moment. It might take work to make this last, especially because their lives are on such different levels and while Pisces might be able to idealize their way into feelings for Capricorn, Capricorn isn’t terribly respectful of Pisces’ feelings. Be careful, but let yourselves feel it out.

PISCES and AQUARIUS These minds are much more similar than they think, and they’re immediately drawn to each other. Aquarius loves Pisces’ idealistic nature, which perfectly complements their creative side. Pisces can’t see anything about Aquarius they don’t like, and it shows. The two are innately bonded, and whatever love grows between them, whether it’s based in friendship or romance, is true as ever. Aquarius loves to create new things, and Pisces loves to observe them and aid as much as they can. Pisces is the emotional heart to Aquarius’ intellectual flair, and it allows them to be each other’s muses in many ways, with both inspiring a new level of understanding. This is a very spiritual friendship with intense results.

PISCES and PISCES The most easy-going pairing in the zodiac is a pair of Pisces. Their intuition means that there’s little they can’t already understand about their partner, and their dreamy natures translate to a laid-back relationship that rarely sees conflict or excitement. Excitement, of course, isn’t always the goal of the Pisces, and in this case it’s the easiest thing in the world for them to spend a lot of time staring each other’s eyes, or having lofty fantastical thoughts while embracing on the couch. They might need to be careful of a tendency towards lethargy because they’re just that comfortable around each other, but there’s something lovely about two people who are content to stay in bed all day and be dreamy.


Jump to Another Sign:

ARIESTAURUSGEMINICANCERLEOVIRGOLIBRASCORPIOSAGITTARIUSCAPRICORNAQUARIUSPISCES

Pages: 1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10 11 12See entire article on one page

Full-time writer, part-time lover, freelancing in fancy cheese and cider.

Kate has written 131 articles for us.

266 Comments

  1. SPOT ON, BANG TIDY & SERIOUSLY GENIUS.. Loving your work :o) Feels like this was written with humour, empathy and the perfect balance between providing enough relevant info to be useful without going OTT..
    I’m a Gemini and am enjoying probably the most gorgeous relationship of my life so far with a Taurean lady. On paper it should be a train wreck, but in fact it’s just beautiful. Am just enjoying every day as it comes and not questioning or analysing it. I love astrology and think there’s a lot of helpful insight to be gained from it, equally I’m so happy to be in a relationship that’s an exception to the mystic rule book..

  2. Ha — it’s always been kind of hard to put stock in horoscopes when I’m a leo, and while I can be egotistical, I’m also the shy, socially awkward, anxious type. I still think they’re fun, though.

    • aha, yea same, sometimes i always wonder if im even a leo or if the astrology chart is wrong, because most times when you look up, “intresting facts about leos”, one of them will always say that a leo is super confident, I mean yes I can be very confident and out going, but not necessarily with, love, friends, and other things.But ya know, im a teen and ive never dated a girl before, but i already know i like women, because ya know, ya just know.But uh, yea, i found this pretty helpful. Also i just like commenting lmao.so yeeeee

    • And the Virgo thing is also wrong. Virgos love to fall for me. Every. Last. One. Critical thinkers who explore the world and learn together, maybe write, draw, and dance a bit, that’s what Aries and Virgos do.

  3. Anassa Kata!! Greetings from Israel. I just joined autostraddle. I am known as OldLadyKlainer on tumblr. I graduated from BMC in ’75
    with a major in Hist.of Religion. I have 3 grown children: my ‘baby’
    is a combat soldier in the IDF and a TaeKwonDo champion. My older daughter lives in NYC and is LGBT. She goes to college. I am a Sagittarius who may be a ‘late in life’ LGBT woman (like Meredith
    Baxter). I am a retired chef and English teacher; currently I do clothing alterations at home. I crochet, knit, quilt, cook and read
    ferociously. I look forward to reading your columns in the future.
    So nice to meet you. mamahufflepuff

  4. I’ve always loved astrology so this was fun to read :p I’m a Capricorn and my girlfriend is a Gemini and we’re more similar to each other than to anyone else. Been dating almost a year and have yet to really argue. I totally agree with my description, but I guess she’s a rare seed with hers because I think she should really be a Taurus xD Super fun article :3

  5. OHMYGOD you guys. Try looking at these with you & your partner’s Venus signs. Taken in combination with your sun signs, you may find that the parts you disagree with are right on the money with the Venus signs.

    I’m a Sagittarius sun and Scorpio Venus. My girlfriends are Capricorn/Capricorn and Aquarius/Pisces. My newest interest is a Taurus/Gemini, and while I would never make a relationship decision based exclusively on someone’s astrological indications, there’s nothing wrong with noticing patterns. My best friends, my lovers that were great, and the ones that weren’t, and the people I can’t stand – mostly fit the pattern (with a few outliers).

  6. yeah. i’m used to Cancer assessments being deadddd wrong for me. sucks because i’m super into astrology/metaphysical stuff!

    i’m basically the exact opposite of needy and/or emotional in relationships. i’ve almost exclusively been in friends-with-benefits situations (with one possible exception, and that ended BECAUSE i wasn’t aware that we were “official” until they brought it up casually & i bolted), and i don’t have plans to change that in future.

    the potential of commitment by either me or the other party freaks me out, i don’t like monogamy, i never get emotionally invested or have butterflies / general mushy feelings, & i’m all-around aromantic… how far from Cancer can you get?!

    but i still like to cuddle!

    the Aquarius description isn’t far off, which is interesting since that’s my moon sign. maybe that’s my dominant personality since Cancers are ruled by the moon! see, i want it to work!

  7. So I thought “this is a fun article” and I pop over to the Scorpio page and start reading through and everything hits the mark except for one really clashing part… the bit where I’m meant to be introverted.

    And then I see the apparent reaction between Scorpio and Leo and I’m thinking, “this Leo sounds more like me”.

    So I go over to the Leo page and read the first bit and everything agrees with me… but then it doesn’t mention some of the things that really clicked on the Scorpio page. The only way I can figure it is that personality-wise I must be some kind of mad combination of the two. It is true that I need my personal space but I also crave so much my very active social life and have past experience of being absolutely miserable without it.

    The horoscope here indicates the combination of personality types as a tempestuous ‘one to avoid’ between two people. Somehow combined within one person, I can only give a sardonic recognition giggle and come to the same conclusion. Lol.

    My gorgeous Pisces girlfriend of 2-years-and-counting however indeed seems a perfect fit for either, and is absolutely a perfect fit for me! :) <3

  8. Just the other day I was lamenting that all the astrology sites catered to heterosexuals, whereas I’m a dorky homo who realizes how silly it is to look at her horoscope for relationship advice but does it anyway. Thanks for not making me stoop so low as to take advice aimed at straight men.

  9. OK so as a Scorpio sun and rising I believe that I totally relate to my sign in every aspect, but I do not fit with the zodiac match ups. I am generally attracted to Aries, Aquarius and Leo and not at all Gemini, Virgo or cancer. So I checked out my moon and I’m a cancer of which I don’t think I relate to at all . Anyway awesome post , thuroughly enjoyed reading through !

  10. Ok, I totally agree with this on a surface level. Strictly going by sun signs. And yet, as a scorpio who is in a serious long term relationship with a leo, and totally head over heals in love with her I might add, I have to remind the masses that there’s more to astrology than sun signs. Your whole chart should be taken into consideration. My partner and I have more in common under the surface than our sun signs would have you believe. Thus, I would caution anyone who takes astrology to heart to dig deeper into a person’s chart rather than writing them off because of first glances at their birthdate. To be fair both times I’ve dated an Aries it was a total train wreck. The trains collided, exploded into flames, and then they re-materialized and did it a few more times just to emphasize how wrong I was in thinking that could have ever worked.

  11. Hi I am Harper,a Libra and 18 in a wonderful relationship with my 19 year old Aries friend Anrina. This post is true in some cases but honestly, both of us love being with each other and all. She is bossy and rude sometimes (ok, most of the times) and I am always arguing.We met when I was 13 in school. She is amazing and the “opposites attract mantra” still works. There’s rarely any frustrated tears and all. Infact she’s right beside me now laughing…

  12. I wonder if instead of using sun signs it makes more sense to focus on Venus, cause that’s the planet of love and sex? I find that my Venus in Scorpio is so more important in my own chart regrading relationships, whereas my Sun (ego) in Libra is more applicable to my work and other projects.

  13. I’m dating a Capricorn and I’m a Gemini. So far, it has been a communication challenge because us Gems are more mental, so we seek that stimulation and communication is key. My Cap seems to appreciate life at this point in life so we enjoy each others presence as Gems like to be child-like at times. We’ve had a disagreement so far which me being a Gem, I pushed away automatically. She was able to calm me and help me look through the situation. Gems need that because we will push away if we don’t feel loved or appreciated enough. She stays on me as far as task, and I stay on her as far as goals and making sure she holds up to what she says she will do.

  14. I’m a Pisces woman dating a Gemini woman and we’ve had a very magnetic relationship in the beginning had some ups and downs since then and we’ve managed to smooth out all of the rough spots simply by communicating with each other. I don’t smother her with too much affection and she’s not too detached to where I don’t feel the love like most Pisces-Gemini relationships. We also put in a lot of effort and compromise into making our relationship work which is most important aspect aside from communication. Any sun sign combo can work with these two things.

  15. Taurus here!

    Been with my Scorpio girlfriend for almost five years now and we’ve never been happier or more in love!
    What you said about our pairing is pretty damn spot on, too!

  16. Good read. Compatibility differs when it comes to friendship, sex and relationship. Over the years, I’ve compiled my own empirical truths on who gives the best bang for the buck, who one can hang around with and who should be your life partner. Some are spot on in your analysis here but if one is truly honest and have had lived expansively, one will agree that to each his own and that everyone is very different. Upbringing and life experiences matters a lot and can change one’s horoscopic stereotypes externally. However, truth be told, every sign retains ONE of their true CORE essence internally. It’s up to you or your partner to discover which one defines either one.

    I’m a Piscean with Sagi rising and brought up in a very challenging warrior lifestyle. I’m supposed to get along well with Cancerians and Scorpions but I pretty much loathe them for all the right and wrong reasons. I’m way too aggressive and honest frank for them to find comfort and solace and I never back down or lose from a fight I’m cornered into. I’ve told my closest friends and family-I never fight 99.9% of the time, but if I’m forced to, I won’t fight, I will make sure I KILL you! That is why I genuinely fear my own darkness :) Some may recoil at this revelation but the root is that if that loser is unlucky to unleash my pandora’s box of pent up abuse over my lifetime, he/she earned it-no regrets! Otherwise, boringly, I’m compassionate, protective, extremely old fashioned loyal, but will not tolerate nor sympathises with hypocrites, traitors and deliberate losers. Sex wise, I consistently find a few tried and tested signs that can seriously quench my hunger for immense satisfying pleasures; and some, I would never ever touch with a mile long pole even if they looked like a Greek god-dess! Good attitude is key. Sexiness with mutual respect is seductive and addictive. Surprisingly, when I shared some of these observations, many concurred, which could mean some signs are universally sh*t, and some are must grab! LOL.

    Using horoscopes to filter hookups-frens-partners may limit the sampling size, but I rather be sane, grounded, harmonious and alive than dragging closeted mental case residuals and debris along. Yes indeed there are exceptions to the rule in anything but sadly, way too far and in between for me to take the chance again and again. Trust your own instincts when connecting with someone new or those who have yet to earn your trust. Observe, take notes, remember common patterns and always ask for their star signs. They may find you “strange or creepy” but turn it around and entice them into submitting by disclosing that you know which signs are always a great lay and which are jerks. Trust me, they will be enamoured to know for themselves. Everyone’s a narcissist deep down. It’s then up to u to dispense wisdom while you choose how to sample them, ala carte.
    The library’s open. Good Reading y’all !!

  17. Pisces & Taurus – when there are other balanced Astro makeups in the charts…WOW is it such an out of this world match.

    Holy crap sensual excellence!!! Less talk more action. So good.
    Very few times do “arguments” happen and then they do, there is always a realization that we’re going somewhere and elevating the relationship to a new level.
    But DANG is the physical part good. So good.
    Spiritual and physical bliss. When it’s right it is very right. A Taurus with some water in their chart is a good choice.

  18. Very lucky Taurus sun signs to be with you. I am not a Taurus but sun, venus, juipter and mercury are in Scorpio. my moon is in aquarius. You are a beautiful woman on every level. hopefully the possessive nature of the Taurus is safe for you. I have a lot of aquarius in my chart. Freedom is needed in relationships. Good luck beautiful

    Artemis Hannah
    xo

Contribute to the conversation...

Yay! You've decided to leave a comment. That's fantastic. Please keep in mind that comments are moderated by the guidelines laid out in our comment policy. Let's have a personal and meaningful conversation and thanks for stopping by!