Why reach for the knife when you can just put on a disguise! Take a cue from bugs bunny and you’ll never end up on trial just to be acquitted by a homophobic jury again!

Let’s sing about rainbows, follow @autostraddle on twitter, appreciate jezebel, party in who-ville despite the Mormons and start all over again with “How do You Like Us Now.”

Who won the Rodeo Disco Pride Raffle? Watch our video and find out!

Chaz Bono enlightens America about gender reassignment surgery, says he feels better than ever, and gives us an opportunity to discuss the popular and problematic term “sex change”! Also; Caster keeps her title, hate crimes are on the rise in LA and six scary quotes from Sarah Palin’s book tour.

Shark Week! Also: Drop Dead Diva, True Blood, Deadly Waters, Intervention (by Tinkerbell), Nurse Jackie, The Colony, My Life on the D-List and Weeds! And our Hot Girl is our So You Think You Can Dance endorsement.

Meredith Baxter officially comes out to The Advocate, after joining the gays on our recent Sweet Caribbean Cruise (she’s gonna be in Jill Bennett & Cathy DeBouno’s web-series!). Also, Zach Quinto confesses his love for Anyone But Me, we declare Adam Lambert as Autostraddle’s Sexiest Man of 2009 and an incredible photoshoot inspired by Prop H8.

If only every hot actress was like Charlize Theron, who bid a kiss with her off for $140K to one lucky lady. I think she might be onto something. Also; bitch magazine ponders Adam Lambert’s whole “thing,” nerve has 10 sexy tomboys, The Lynch is returning to Party Down and Gay Dads thrive! It’s SUNDAY FUNDAY!

“Celesbians” extraordinaire Jill Bennett & Cathy DeBuono talk to Autostraddle about filming “We Have to Stop Now” during a hurricane onboard the Sweet Cruise and how vlogging for SheWired allows more swearing & sexy talk.

“Craftster was very much at the forefront of what we now lovingly refer to as the indie craft movement. In fact, some even credit Leah and her brainchild with being the face that launched a thousand glue guns.”

Somewhere between 20,000 and 200,000 gays & supporters marched on Washington on Sunday — a commentary roundup. Also; speeches by Lady Gaga & Cynthia Nixon (and Gaga’s HRC Dinner performance of “imagine,” a bus breakdown derails Chicago marchers, black people feel left out of gay rights agenda, and the haters hate back.

“What I believe hurts our case a bit, from a PR (and strategic) perspective, is that we’ve seen few LGBT people of color on-air as the movement faces off against the first black President and his administration.” – Pam Spaulding

There’s SO much drama right now about your alleged unwillingness to be gay on the cover of OUT magazine, Adam Lambert!. Gay men have so many feelings, cats, candles and guitars, don’t they? Well, take the train to Lezzieville Adam Lambert Fan HQ where we’ve got an offer you just can’t refuse.

“I write about what I know: sex, pornography, art, fame obsession, drugs, and alcohol. I mean, why would anyone care to listen to me if I wasn’t an expert in what I write about?”

Our beloved shows march off into the lonely winter months with jokes! Recaps of Gossip Girl, Modern Family, 30 Rock, the Office, Ugly Betty, FlashForward, Parks and Recreation, and Saturday Night Live.

Banksy’s biggest exhibit installed in secret at the Bristol Museum, Hey Hey Pride Party Contest Giveaway, Obama’s big plan, D-Sea speaks out, Kelly’s “lesbian hell” and Fairytales without happy endings.

Guess what day it is? Okay, I’ll tell you, it’s BLOOMSDAY! It’s also Lewis Bernard’s Birthday. You should email him today, send a copy of your email to [email protected], and then you’ll win a copy of the FUTURE IS BRIGHT CD with a custom-made CD cover by Laneia

Lesbian Cowgirls, Muffy the Vampire Slayer, Orgasm Day, Working in a Porn Store, Her Weirdest Time, Waxing and p.s. Overweight & Underweight Ladies Take More Sexual Risks. Also let’s join the Australian Sex Party! Hot photos though.

The Guardian UK says: “With two lesbians shortlisted for the supreme court and more than 30 GLBTS appointed to senior posts by the president, the US is witnessing an unprecedented cultural change that is reshaping politics, media, and popular culture.”

“My Staff Pick today is ME. More specifically, my name — it’s not really Green. My name’s Laneia. Hi! I’m Laneia.”

I’m not sure why anyone at this point could doubt the power of the American people to rally around a ballot box to ensure gays don’t get what they want.