Our weekly tribute to how funny and smart all you commenters are! (Except the anti-equality gang from Election Day, no treats for you, go eat some shellfish.)

Under Uganda’s anti-homosexuality bill, gays face life imprisonment at a minimum and often execution and the public is required to report gays or go to jail. Who are the Americans supporting Uganda’s Museveni legislation of evil? We break it all down for you. Also; should we settle for civil unions, the implications of Perry v. Schwarzenegger, another teacher-student lesbian sex scandal and “Who Do We Have to Blow to Get Gay Marriage in New York”?

Mitrice Richardson went missing in September, but never got the attention granted to white, blonde, heterosexual children. But new clues bring new hope and the gay & lesbian community can help you guys! Plus lots of other headlines.

The American Family Association is being such a stage mom to Jesus and was boycotting the Gap for not using the word “Christmas” — we’ll tell you why that boycott is now on hold. Also, it’s boom time for unpaid interns, is Glee anti-Christian?, Sarah Palin gets PUNK’D, JCrew is weird and Australian senator compares homosexuality to incest. Again. Sigh.

The ex-gay movement and Pat Robertson’s religious righteousness army want you to think they’re going to be persecuted under the Hate Crimes Law (but they’re not). THAT’S GAY does ex-gays, Wanda Sykes gives her Obama eval and Argentina considers gay marriage.

We’ve read every single one of your comments, and Friday’s results are in! We think the vote is unanimous — Autostraddlers win at life. (Prizes may include: witty banter, street cred, sexual advances, and internet fame.)

Someone left a voicemail threatening to shoot a former anti-gay leader in Maine. The House health care bill actually includes several benefits for the gay community. Plus, Ellen graces the cover of O magazine.

Alan Cumming’s latest blog post sums up the week perfectly, and addresses perhaps Newsweekgate’s most underasked question: “What is wrong with being effeminate, anyway?” It’s Friday, y’all. Let us praise ye wise men who know “queeny” isn’t even a word, give you some wisdom and share some of our favorite videos; Kurt’s Turn in Glee, Adam Lambert goes crazy, Alan Cumming emcees, Rickie finds World Happiness and Peter Paige finds Emmet’s truth.

How the totally false Lindsay Lohan HIV rumor got started and why everyone needs to give that girl a f*cking break. Also; a writer goes undercover at Christian Gay Conversion camp, The Boondocks premieres, THE MARBLE FAUN from Grey Gardens gets his own documentary (and he’s gay!), and the redheaded soldier from the GaGa in Afghanistan video has two mommies!

Today is World AIDS Day. Find out how you can get involved and get the facts about the epidemic and how it effects women. Hillary Clinton speaks out against LGBT discrimination on World AIDS Day and we hope she’s talking about Uganda. Rachel Maddow DOES talk about Uganda, Queerty’s letting you vote on an LDS ad campaign, a California man is trying to ban divorce. And the Chinese government opens a gay bar.

Lesbian country music artists may be few and far between, but they do exist! A look at the ladies that Chely Wright will have on her side as she ventures into the great homosexual horizon! Oh and we found a friend for Christian singer Jennifer Knapp too!

Crystal & Riese recap the finale of Skins Season Four, “Everyone.” In which a few moments of beauty are somewhat clouded by a lethal dose of WTF. But it’s funny. ahahahahahah!

In 2009 Autostraddle was born. Just in time for the apocalypse! In this letter from the editor, you’ll find out what happened, what’s happening next, and how special everyone is.

Obama wins the Nobel Peace Prize after only nine months in office, surprising everyone in the world including him. Lesbians suffer more under DADT, and the possibility of gay marriage in D.C & New Jersey.

Looking back on it now, it all makes sense: these are films you probably loved if you were born in the ’80s and turned out gay. What are your favorites?

Yesterday our #1 search term was “Jillian Michaels Vanessa Marcil” and now we know why — get the full ‘scoop’ on ‘important things’ right here. Also, Carol Leifer goes on Howard Stern with a lot of feelings about Ellen DeGeneres ALSO! Tegan & Sara interview, Gaga explains nearly passing out on stage in New Zealand, Cynthia Nixon’s GLAAD speech, and a new teaser for Jill Bennett & Cathy DeBuono’s web series, We Have To Stop Now.

Christ almighty.

Straight male comedian, Dylan Rhymer, has a hilarious and charming piece defending gay marriage in this Funny or Die clip.

Nicole Kidman and Gwyneth Paltrow will play a couple in “The Danish Girl.” The New York governor is pushing for a vote on same-sex marriage today. And a new survey of troops says support for DADT is on the decline.

Jill Bennett & Cathy DeBuono held a feature length screening and outdoor bash to celebrate the second season launch of lesbian web-series, “We Have to Stop Now.” We have exclusive photos from the party including Q&A footage and a first look review that breaks down why this is entertainment worth paying for. Plus, a one-on-one interview with writer/creator Ann Noble!