Keep It Real
I love this product because it combines two of my favorite things: warmth and grass.
The “Make Me Over” clitoral vibe by Kandi Burruss is handheld and looks like a compact!
Do you know what’s better than snow angels? Lying outside, in the sand, listening to music. For those of you who, like me, cannot wait for winter to be over, this charming trinket should accompany you during the next bathing suit season.
I’ve been wanting a bento box ever since Laneia wrote a post about them. Not only are bento boxes adorable, their small compartments are perfect for eclectic weirdo eaters like myself. Why yes I would appreciate a divider to prevent the croutons from mixing with the pomegranate seeds. And aren’t bento boxes the #1 doctor recommended treatment for queer girls prone to wasting money on fast food during their lunch breaks? Yeah, I’m pretty sure that’s true.
Possibly the creation of a jet-setting gambling addict, the Scratch Personalized World Map lets you scratch off the countries you’ve traveled to lottery ticket-style. Even though there’s no chance of winning money for this scratch-off, but hang it in your apartment to win the awe of visitors who’ll see what a stylish and badass traveler you are.
Special Things Are Special
I like odd accessories, particularly because I wear a lot of solid colors so I have the flexibility to add anything extra to my outfit without feeling like it’s competing with my clothes. Also, I became fascinated by animal skulls after going to a friend’s house that was decorated with some she found during work related desert field trips. I don’t have anything of the sort, so I’ve been dropping hints about this ring or the Bird Skull Necklace Cluster in Bronze for a while now.
I kind of fell in love with these boots the second I moved to the Bay Area. I never went hiking in Rhode Island and there are so many places to go here, I feel like my kicks are going to fall apart by the end of the year if I don’t substitute them with some serious business boots. I really like these boots. Not only does Ahnu’s last fit my problematically narrow feet super well, these boots also have a padded ankle collar that makes me want to go to sleep in them. In addition, this style of Ahnu boot has a layer of eVent material that makes them completely waterproof yet breathable — sort of like Goretex in other brands, but minus the excessive sweating. They also have a Vibram sole that gives them phenomenal traction, which I’ll need for running around the mountains, showing off my boots.
People have this weird aversion to gift cards, but I’m including them here because some of the most thoughtful presents I’ve gotten have been just that. I’ve gotten gift cards accompanied by letters, elaborate stories, and even direct guidelines for their use. I’ve never gotten one that is just kind of “here’s some money” for whatever I choose, but more like “I can’t get you a particular thing, and I know what you really want is to not have to drag your books around, so I’d like to chip in $10 for you to get closer to getting that eReader on Amazon. ¡Feliz Navidad!” Eventually I end up collecting enough cards that whenever I spend them, I end up with a gift that reminds me of more than one person, and I really like that. In fact, this winter I would love to get a gift card for any coffee shop so I can avoid going broke due to my need for caffeine, all while thinking about the rad human who is enabling me this time around. Some people may find it odd, but I think it’s super useful and sweet because it’s like the person is buying me coffee everyday on my way to work, even when they are not around to physically do so. That’s the kind of thoughtful treat I’m talking about.
My mom used to tell me to think very hard on whether something was a want or a need. Now, the Harry Potter Wizard’s Collection definitely falls into the “wants” category, but I feed the need in my bones. The ultimate collection of DVDs and resources and special features and everything wonderful about Harry Potter packed inside a neat, compact box. Sigh.
What better way to start my descent into cat lady-dom than with this cute dress? I could wear this dress anywhere — work, to get coffee, on a date. The opens are limitless.
Reading In Our Underwears
I love dresses and t-shirts that masquerade as dresses. From the Je Suis Une Femme line, this high-waisted belt is perfect for turning otherwise ordinary dresses and long t-shirts into stylish, quirky works of art. Designer Nicola Inman handcrafts each belt herself, so no two belts are the same. As an added bonus, whoever buys this belt for me will be supporting a queer artist, just sayin’.
Kate Beaton is this great Canadian comic I discovered last year while writing a research paper on comic book adaptations of Macbeth. Instead of finishing my paper in a timely fashion like the good student I try to be, I spent hours on her website browsing through her historical comics. I never knew Canadian history could be so funny and entertaining. When I found out her website also comes in book form, I knew I had to get my hands on a hard copy of Hark! A Vagrant! the book! But I still haven’t bought it yet, so if someone would like to get it for me that would be great.
If I didn’t have responsibilities, I would probably end up spending all my money on books, bras, and plane tickets. When I first read about the Lingerie Lesbian here on Autostraddle, I fell in love. Words can’t describe how happy I am that there’s another lesbian on the internet who loves lingerie as much as I do. Words also can’t describe how much I want the Vero Moda bra and underwear set she advertised on her blog.
Signature Floral Prints
The FitBit is the kind of thing that should totally not be necessary in my ongoing quest to become a regular enthusiastic gym-goer, but I’ve convinced myself that if I don’t get it I’ll never run a 10k. It makes no sense and I know this, which is why I could never buy it for myself but I do really want it. It’s so cool! You wear it on your bra or your belt or in your pocket, and it tracks your exercise and your sleep cycle and your meals and it can sync everything up on your computer or on the app! And and and — you can have competitions with other FitBit users! I mean actually it’s all I can do to just put one foot in front of the other when I go running, but I like the idea of one day holding FitBit competitions with the whole Straddleverse.
Since I joined Instagram in April, I’ve been searching for the perfect way to print my little digital square images. As a photographer and film enthusiast, I’m always sort of bemoaning how nothing is tangible anymore and how I miss the darkroom and how one day technology is going to fail us and then where will all our memories go? (Yes, I’m dramatic, but yes, I’ve suffered hard drive failure with no backup, so.) After a lot of research, it’s become clear to me that Printstagram is the best service for printing Instagram images. You can get a memory box filled with every Instagram photo you’ve ever taken, or you can make a poster of 50-400 images, or you could make a cute Polaroid-esque business card, OR YOU COULD MAKE A TINY BOOK THAT HAS A MAGNET IN IT AND CAN STICK TO YOUR FRIDGE. A TINY BOOK, PEOPLE. I’m, um, a little bit excited about that last option.
No one can really buy this for me as part of the joy is choosing your own shit, but I’m hoping the people behind Printstagram will see this post and realize they should make gift certificates for next year. Think of the possibilities!
I used to be really afraid of online shopping but then I met ModCloth and now I think I have to get over my fear because they have an entire section devoted to floral print dresses. If you’ve stalked me sufficiently you may know I have a “penchant for floral print dresses” and actually my Autostraddle username is “floralprintdress” because back in the day I was trying to be secretive and anonymous lest my mother ever Google me and find all my comments about how hot Sarah Croce is. But back to my point: If it’s floral print, I’ll buy it. I’ve been dying for a new dress for New Year’s Eve, but there’s a 95% chance that I’ll be staying in with my girlfriend and falling asleep by 12:05am, so I can’t really justify the purchase. That rational perspective doesn’t stop me from actively wanting every single floral print dress featured on ModCloth, particularly this one, this one, and this one.
Runner Ups / Things I’ll Probably Buy Myself Come January: the perfect rug (I need to find it before I can buy it but winter is making my wood bedroom floor mighty chilly), iPhone gloves, and a Moleskine Planner preferably featuring Le Petit Prince.
Next Up: power tools, bow ties and more vibrators!