Welcome to NSFW Sunday!
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+ On Tuesday, San Francisco’s board of supervisors voted to ban public nudity. People who go naked or partly naked in public will now be fined $100 for a first violation, $200 for a second violation in the same year, and $500 or up to a year in jail for a third:
“The law will not go into effect until after Feb. 1, which will allow enough time for a federal judge to consider a lawsuit brought against the city by a group of nudists who claim that the ordinance infringes on their constitutional right to free speech. […]
This is a city that prides itself on its inclusivity and diversity and, in that vein, the ordinance does allow for some exceptions.
Preschoolers can still go bare, women can still go topless and public nudity will continue to be allowed at events permitted by the city, including the annual gay pride parade and the Folsom Street Fair, a street party billed as the largest leather and fetish event in the world.”
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+ The debate over prehistoric nudity continues. In an interview with Slate, Paleolithic archaeologist April Nowell explains that while all interpretations are speculation, some are less speculative than others:
“When we interpret Paleolithic art more broadly, we talk about ‘hunting magic’ or ‘religion’ or ‘fertility magic.’ I don’t think these interpretations have the same social ramifications as pornography. When respected journals — Nature for example — use terms such as ‘Prehistoric pin-up’ and ‘35,000-year-old sex object,’ and a German museum proclaims that a figurine is either an ‘earth mother or pin-up girl’ (as if no other roles for women could have existed in prehistory), they carry weight and authority.”
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+ At the Lingerie Addict, the Lingerie Lesbian writes about what it’s like to be gay and working in underwear:
“The funny thing about being a lesbian in the lingerie industry is that it feels like a paradox: I see versions of myself everywhere and nowhere at the same time. It’s undeniable that female homoeroticism plays a part in so many lingerie editorials, both implicitly and explicitly, that it’s not difficult for me to find photographs featuring both luxury lingerie and women in sexually charged situations with other women. What are missing are voices to match these images or the acknowledgement that these images are not merely fantasies, but could reflect a reality, my reality.
This is an issue that exists everywhere, not only in lingerie and not only in fashion. But in fashion, this complete lack of a queer female perspective can seem even odder than it might in other areas considering the way so much of fashion is tinged with sexuality.”
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Apinda Mpako and Ayanda Magudulela by Zanele Muholi
+ If you order over $100 at Babeland, you’ll receive Babeland’s Satin Bondage Kit (including a mask that can double as wrist restraints and two satin ties) and free two-day shipping. Use the code TIEDUP at checkout.
+ People rate sex and alcohol or “partying” as the activities that make them the most happy. According to a new study at the University of Canterbury, sex rates highest in the categories of pleasure, meaning and engagement. Drinking rates second for pleasure but tenth for meaning. Meanwhile, checking Facebook ranked last in meaning and near the bottom of all other categories. Researcher Carsten Grimm explains:
“From my research I can see what activities are routinely rated as highest and lowest in people’s daily lives. Having sex is (no surprise) highest on all measures of happiness. Being sick is again, no surprise, relatively low on all measures. Going to lectures, or studying, is low on pleasure and happiness, but ranks relatively high on meaning (7th out of 30 behaviour categories).
The results have implications for what psychologists have called ‘the full life.’ Those who tend to be high on all three orientations to happiness not only score high on life satisfaction, they also tend to have higher experiences of pleasure, meaning, engagement and happiness in their daily lives.”
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+ Between My Sheets has released its list of the top 100 sex bloggers of 2012.
+ Sexis suggests places to have sex in public where you (probably) won’t get caught.
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Dylan Ryan in Tooth and Nail
+ i09 asks, why do geeks like kinky sex?:
“There is also something to be said for the idea that as geeks we tend to be inside our heads a lot. We like fantasies, whether they’re about spaceships or demonically hot creatures of the netherworld. So when we have sex, we want to bring our imaginations along. Hence, the fun of roleplaying. Whether you pretend to be a fictional character, a coolly controlled domme, or a very bouncy werewolf, you’re having sex that’s half in the physical world and half in the world created by you and your partner(s)’ minds.”
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+ Getting naked: it is good for you:
“The Florida Young Naturists, who have thrown a Spring Break Bash yearly since 2009, have seen the profound impact an excursion into nudism can have. ‘People have come for the first time and left the weekend crying,’ says Robbe White, the group’s founder. ‘People [who] have self-image issues, weight issues, stuff like that… naturism really does kind of break down walls, and people feel loved and accepted and free in their own skin.’
I attended the FYN’s 2011 party, at the Sunsport Gardens Nudist Resort in Loxahatchee, Florida, and found plenty of young people who’d found, in nudism, a community that felt authentic and accepting. […]
‘Naturism has helped me to accept my body,’ said one women. ‘As a bigger woman, I’ve [been made to feel] like there’s something wrong with me. But here, you learn that body types vary — and that they’re all normal.'”
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+ At Narratively, Mike Albo writes about spending a decade in the world of gay online hookups. Obviously dude-focused but also good:
“After spending time in the Internet hookup world, you begin to become even more sensitive to the unseeable, etheric quality that emanates from people in cyberspace. After all the initial chatting, you are confronted with someone’s vibrations in person, and then have to compare them with the flat profile version you’ve already constructed in your head. It’s great if the two match up, but sometimes the person has a vaguely unpleasant yogurt smell. Or flaky eyebrows. Or just an all-around demonic aura. Then, you learn to respect and trust the potent yet subtle body and sexo-chemical cues you have within you. Even more than you did before we created a sexual Amazon.”
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+ The shortlist for the Literary Review‘s Bad Sex Award, which aims “to draw attention to the crude and often perfunctory use of redundant passages of sexual description in the modern novel – and to discourage it,” is out. The list of nominees includes: Back to Blood by Tom Wolfe, The Yips by Nicola Barker, The Adventuress by Nicholas Coleridge, Infrared by Nancy Huston, Rare Earth by Paul Mason, Noughties by Ben Masters, The Quiddity of Will Self by Sam Mills and The Divine Comedy by Craig Raine.
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I rarely read NSFW Sunday but when I do I love your choice of articles. The one about online dating is really interesting, though I’m tempted to write one about how/if the experience is different for women.
Is the hookup culture the same as “online dating” though? Ive always thought online dating to look for a relationship is different than online dating strictly for hooking up.
I love the way the lingerie lesbian writes: “But in fashion, this complete lack of a queer female perspective can seem even odder than it might in other areas considering the way so much of fashion is tinged with sexuality.”
I wonder and think about those issues a lot myself. As is:
Why is lesbianism or bisexuality so oftenly used to sell stuff but never considering lesbians and bisexuals (and what else there is in the queer universe) as actual people who are involved in this.
Yes, spot on. Female queerness is eroticized and packaged by companies such as VS to sell their product, but we ourselves (female queers of all ranges) aren’t part of their target audience. Of course, there are loads of us who readily buy lingerie for ourselves/our loves/ladyfriends, but still their focus on hetero women and their partners. I liked this part of the article as well:
“And then, of course, lingerie-clad women posing together provocatively do have a presumed audience: men. This editorial in GQ is the epitome of what’s wrong with many “lesbian” lingerie editorials. Lesbian sexuality is a joke (the accompanying headline is: “Alison Brie and Gillian Jacobs Did This Lesbian Scene for Us”), it’s entertainment and it’s coerced for the pleasure of the (explicitly male) viewer.”
Thank you so much! Check out the rest of my blog for more where that came from. Also, my post was republished on Jezebel if you want to read some comments to get your blood boiling :) : http://jezebel.com/5961998/what-its-like-to-be-a-lesbian-in-the-lingerie-industry
OOOOOOO blood boiling, indeed! G**damn, but some people are *ignorant*. The ones that really got me were the ones along the lines of, “But that’s how men think and that’s what they like, so you’ll just have to deal with it.”
Oh, and I’m starting to think that no one understands how lesbians work. First clue: we’re actual people. Thanks for my daily dose of rage, Jezebel commenters.
I read “Satin bondage kit” and “Satin ties” as “Satan bondage kit/ties” and for a moment I felt a spark of concern over the sudden change of direction Babeland had taken.
And when you wrote kit/ties, I read kitties, and was even more concerned.
An alter-ego for the cat in picture 3, perhaps?
Also, those last three pictures, UNF
In that Babeland paragraph I take it you mean two-day shipping? Or is two-day sniffing some kink I don’t know about yet? :D
Two-day sniffing is tame in comparison to longer periods of sniffing. Like a fine wine, your lover’s aroma improves with age… maybe?
Ooooooh, that makes WAY more sense. I was thinking it was something to do with panties or whatever. But then maybe my perspective is skewed having worked for a phone sex line.
These comments were especially funny.
But my mind is racing because someone said they rarely read NSFW Sunday. I just. I just need some time to process this you guys. I just. I just don’t know anymore.
There is nothing even remotely “lesbian” about that Allison Brie/Gillian Jacobs scene other than the fact that they are two women in an intimate setting. They aren’t really touching each other, they aren’t looking at each other… they’re just kneeling really closely to one another. I like that part in the piece where the lingerie lesbian says that in actual queer lingerie scenes, women appear to be more invested in each other than the invisible viewer. As for this scene, there is an implied erotic power dynamic, but all of the attention is focused outward instead of between the two women.
If you look at the rest of the pictures from the shoot, they’re all the same. It’s not remotely daring or sensual, nor does it depict anything that would engage an actual queer person. It is, in fact, incredibly boring and predictable. Until the masses accept that queer women actually exist in households around the world, not just a fiction on their computer screens and magazines, this will remain the same. Visibility is key. As a femme, I know the challenges of female queer visibility all too well.
When you get down to brass tacks, it’s just two straight girls playing dress up for the male gaze. I am questioning the credibility of the person/magazine that labeled this a “lesbian” scene.
The pics that come with NSFW Sunday always make me swoon.
And stuff.
And yay for nudism…..it really is incredibly freeing but maybe it is a lot easier for me because I am German. And especially East Germans have often grown up with this and I really do believe that makes quite the difference in how people are seen by others.
It really made me feel way more comfortable with my body and I am really thankful for that.