A-Camp Recap Day #4: The One With All The Feelings

Welcome to the fourth of four fantastic recaps of our entire experience at the First-Ever A-Camp, which took place two hours outside of Los Angeles at Alpine Meadows in Angelus Oaks, California, from April 26th-29th.

The idea was to take the spirit of the website into three glorious dimensions while simultaneously creating an affordable option for queer ladies for whom other lesbian events (such as Dinah Shore) aren’t a good fit. So, we rented out a summer camp in its off-season and enjoyed a transformative weekend of fun, friendship, panels, workshops, classes, sports, entertainment, events and so forth.

These epically long monster-posts will do their best to explain and extrapolate upon the camp experience, from shitstorms to emotional revelations to glory/triumph.

Last week, we got stranded on the side of the road, last weekend we detailed the first full day of camp, yesterday we enjoyed rehashing the last full day of camp, and today we’ll talk briefly about the last morning of camp but mostly about camp altogether as like, an experience.



Sunday, April 29th

Part One: I’m Wide Awake, It’s Morning

Marni: Ah, Sunday. The Lord’s day. The day of rest. The peaceful, restful end (technically start) to the week. Ani wrote a song about it. So relaxing, Sunday.

cabin pranks - sunday aftermath (photo by jess r)

Marni: I woke up at 5:00am on Sunday (after going to sleep around 2:30 once Laneia’s car was sufficiently loaded up with leftover craft supplies) in order to see off Bren’s 6:00am minivan. I don’t know what we would do without the Brens of the world, I honestly don’t. There was one person more than we were aware of, and she gamefully volunteered to sit on the floor of the van between the two bucket seats for the two-hour trip to the airport. What choice did she have, really. And so began Sunday.

Laneia: I didn’t want to wake up. I didn’t want to get dressed. I didn’t want to put things in suitcases. I didn’t want to go.

Marni: Riese had made some kind of driving plan the day before, but had succumbed early in the night to the overwhelming joy of the talent show and hadn’t had the chance to impart the subtle intricacies of said plan to yours truly, so I was left to my own devices to organize and deploy the morning shuttles, armed only with my tuque, a cup of possibly-decaf-coffee, and a spreadsheet that had been left open on her laptop.

One might not necessarily immediately categorize the ensuing events as “success,” but I can tell you this much: there isn’t anybody left on that mountain as I write this. Not one single human. And we take our small victories where we can.

(photo by heidi b)

Carmen: I packed with a Turbie Twist on, since by this day I was done being ashamed of doing my hair routine in front of other people. Joanna left super early and Taylor confessed to all of us that she super loves bananas and wants to start carrying them around in a Banagrams case. I forgot to drink coffee.

Laneia: Megan and I were scheduled to drive our savior AAA Conley to LAX so she could fly back to the other side of the country. Beth had set up some tasty breakfast treats for the early risers, so we grabbed some danishes and coffee and sort of slipped out before I could say a lot of goodbyes or have any real feelings of departure. I did get to hug Rachel and Crystal though. At least there was that.

(photo by robin roemer)

Laneia: We wasted no time — as soon as we started down the mountain, the three of us were processing our post-camp feelings. I drilled Alicia on what she considered the highs/lows of the weekend and we all talked about wishes and expectations vs. reality. I was pretty much consumed with how I hadn’t spent as much time hanging out with campers as I’d wanted to. We stopped at McDonald’s for more coffee and Alicia had tea. After we dropped her off at LAX, Megan and I agreed that Alicia had really adorable outfits.

Riese: I woke up and had my intern fetch me a coffee and then I assumed van-plan-duty, which was also the duty of making sure Marni still loved me despite my incomprehensible spreadsheet. I had a surprisingly tasty breakfast situation with my daughter, Emily Choo, and then planted myself in Deer Lodge with my laptop trying to figure out how to get everybody off the mountain while apologizing a lot, and running around like a gazelle.

Sara: Beth set out a sandwich bar for us because we had to leave before lunchtime. I was so thankful that there was sunshine for the drive back down the mountain and not fog. We stopped at a gas station and were reminded that the real world outside has straight people and men and it was disappointing.

gaby drives her van (photo by taylor)

Carmen: Between breakfast and lunch I reapplied sunscreen, smoked two cigarettes, made five new friends, halfway became a lesbian club promoter, and continued to follow Brittani around. I saw my first lizard. Also Katrina shared stories with us around a picnic table from the night before. I drank a coffee. I had chosen specifically to wear my YOLO shirt so I could look ridiculous on the plane.

Laneia: I literally couldn’t stop talking about camp. Somewhere around Indio I decided that if I didn’t eat some Chipotle soon I would probably die. Then I talked about camp while I ate Chipotle and didn’t die.

Riese: There were a few hours of respite when all the vans were on the road and we were awaiting their return, which’s when I “packed” and said “bye” to people like Haviland and Ashley. Brandy told me she felt the weekend had been transformative and Julie and Brandy said they’d definitely be there next time and my heart enlarged and burst out of my chest.

group enjoys extra afternoon time to spend together (photo by rachel walker)

Carmen: Beth said “vagina warriors” at lunch. Someone got a fortune cookie reading, “IT gets better when YOU get better.”

Riese: Which just-so-happens to be what Sarah Palmer and I said in our It Gets Better video.

alex is having a great day

Whitney: We drove back in a 15-passenger van that Rachel was driving — she said she was actually really enjoying driving the gigantic scary vans (“I’m really starting to identify with van drivers”).

Riese: Rachel took TWO LOADS, you guys! TWO. That’s 7.5 hours of driving vans with people in them. What would we do without the Brens and the Rachels of the world. Also, at some point I manned a merch table. This was a crucial decision, because later I’d need the cash earned from selling merch to pay the camp kitchen staff to drive campers back to LA because we ran out of vehicles. I’m serious.

leaving camp (photo by rachel w)

Katrina: Rachel was really great at handling those curves if you know what I mean. Laura read us a poem about life being ephemeral, unlike Mike and Ikes, which can be consumed many times. Whitney led a discussion weighing the pros and cons of the camp bear situation being about leather daddies rather than animals.

Whitney: Riese sent out a memo about not having snacks or liquor in the cabins before we got to A-Camp. Why? Bears. Supposedly, bears will come and get you if you have snacks or alcohol in your cabin. While we didn’t see any furry four-legged animal bears, it seemed like the gay kind would be more likely to come into your cabins to partake of booze and snacks. And if that happened, I’d totally share my edibles and drinkables with those leather daddy bears.

Riese: Sugar & Fitzi told me that they had a “couples crush” on me and Marni and I thought that was just the cutest thing.

sugar & fitzi on the last day (photo by rachel w)

Carmen: I freestyled a full verse as Lil Carmen from her debut hit single, “Two Girls At Once.”

Katrina: Carmen rapped, Jamie bought a holographic cat bookmark, and I fell asleep on the wheel of the van, which started vibrating intensely on a bumpy road, which I think counts as getting laid at A Camp.

Carmen: When I woke up from my nap there were men outside the van, which was really strange and off-putting. Also, “I Came, I Saw, I YOLO’ed” was said in the van by Rachel Kincaid.

Riese: A lot of campers weren’t flying out until like, 10pm, including our staff, and so like a month before camp I’d decided that we should have a Roller Skating party in the afternoon at a roller rink, like Xanadu + Roller Derby + The L Word. I was imagining pizza, pitchers of soda pop and lots of hand-holding. Unable to rouse group enthusiasm for this project, I looked up nearby excursions and decided instead we could all go to Santa Monica Beach!

santa monica pier (photo by rachel w)

Riese: I’d sent out emails pre-camp about it and had my nice list of the 20 or so humans who wanted the field trip. This number exploded on the day of… so for that reason and many others this really ridiculous idea of mine became a giant clusterfuck, eventually, but talking about it will give us all PTSD, so let’s pretend like it never happened. I just wanted people to have fun and not be bored in the airport!!

Marni: Six hours, several vans, two SUVs driven by Alpine kitchen staff and many frantic text messages later and we were all at Santa Monica Pier, having The Best Time of Our Lives Unmarred By Any Negative Feelings Whatsoever.

Lizz: Trying to shuttle everyone back to the airport was almost as hard as getting them all there. Dictator-Lizz came out for a victory lap.

Marni: I had a few very tender moments with my Canadians, who were in great spirits and rallied in a manner befitting our homeland.

joy at the santa monica pier (photo by taylor)




grace, carolyn & taylor (photo by taylor)

Lizz: Grace and I arrived at the airport hours and hours and hours early. We didn’t want to go in to our gates because we were in separate terminals. Unfortunately we also couldn’t sit down for a bite to eat because there was no food before security in either of our terminals. Instead, we hung out underneath the last remaining pay-phones on earth while I charged my iPhone. When we parted ways after an hour we went right back to texting like we always do. It strikes me as amazing how I can have these perfectly seamless in person/online relationships. I sort of love it.

Sara: I left a little bit of my heart at each terminal that I stopped at. As I said goodbye to each camper, I realized just how much I was impacted by each of them, and how sad I would be if I never saw them again.

Carmen: Carrie bought me peanut butter pretzels and popcorn chips for dinner. We dropped everyone off at the airport and I said goodbye to Brittani twice because the first time I left all of my flight information, bus information, and shuttle tickets on the dashboard.

Riese: The good news is that Marni had taken all the extra alcohol, so we generously gifted Robin with a prime bottle of Barefoot Merlot to top off the amazing afternoon.

parking lot at santa monica (photo by taylor)

Carmen: I left my terminal after going through security to get a drink with Jamie and Whitney because I felt like maybe I would start crying if I didn’t. Katrina met up with me and we went back through security together and I started sweating. I listened to Drake’s entire discography on the plane while Katrina slept and Gabby and I drank Corona Extras out of cans.

Riese: We parted ways and Marni and I spent the evening with Crystal in Los Angeles and enjoyed a delightful meal at her favorite restaurant, The Cheesecake Factory. The next morning we went to Executive Van Rental — Lizz and Gabby successfully cajoled them out of charging us for their fucked-up tire, but they did charge us for $200 of “damage” on a different van which was nowhere to be seen. So. Whatever. That part of Monday was so close to the part where we went to the hotel and got Tinkerbell back that it’s all just a fever dream at this point.

(this picture is actually from february 2008, a mere month into tinkerbell's precious life on earth, but it would really fit seamlessly into this recap if i hadn't told you that)

Marni: Tinkerbell was found poolside, with a fresh tan and mani/pedi, having enjoyed a weekend of self-care and relaxation at the Four Points Sheraton LAX. I’m still not convinced she didn’t stage the whole thing.

Carmen: I refused to sleep until I’d written everything down, because I didn’t want to lose one moment in the rewriting. I fell asleep right before Saturday and woke up in New York.

Riese: The whole (eight hours) home we talked about next camp, and how to give me more time to hang out with campers.

Marni: Then I slept for three weeks.


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Riese is the 41-year-old Co-Founder of Autostraddle.com as well as an award-winning writer, video-maker, LGBTQ+ Marketing consultant and aspiring cyber-performance artist who grew up in Michigan, lost her mind in New York and now lives in Los Angeles. Her work has appeared in nine books, magazines including Marie Claire and Curve, and all over the web including Nylon, Queerty, Nerve, Bitch, Emily Books and Jezebel. She had a very popular personal blog once upon a time, and then she recapped The L Word, and then she had the idea to make this place, and now here we all are! In 2016, she was nominated for a GLAAD Award for Outstanding Digital Journalism. She's Jewish and has a cute dog named Carol. Follow her on twitter and instagram.

Riese has written 3178 articles for us.



    And also you said “third of four” at the top and I have a feeling that’s not right.

    Not to be a big “I’m only here to correct your mistakes” douche bag.

    I just wanted to be first.

  2. Camp was really amazing. And to all of you staff who put in so much hard work to make this little piece of heaven for all of us THANK YOU, it was life-changing for me and I just loved every minute of it.

    Also, I’m really sad I missed the ch-ch-cherry bomb cabin photo, but my pre-talent show jitters made me run off so I could have time to perfect my song haha.

    Unfortunately I can’t make it in September but I’m SO EXCITED for everyone who gets to do it all over again and for those who will be experiencing the magic for the first time! <3

  3. Riese, you’re a really fucking good writer, and a really fantastic person. How fucking cool is it that you’ve inspired all of these people to jump all the way out of their comfort zones and have these incredible experiences? Thank you (and all of the Autostraddle staff, it’s so obvious how hard you all worked, like holy shit, Marni and Robin, etc.) for camp. Seriously. Regardless of any kinks that are left to be worked out, I wouldn’t trade my experience of being at the first A-camp for anything. It was simultaneously the most surreal and most real anything has ever seemed, and despite Marni’s assurances that she got us all off the mountain, part of me is definitely still up there.

    • Also, SO excited that the pic Taylor took of my lyrics sheet is the first picture in this.

      • Legitimately almost cried at seeing that, and a few of you had the pleasure of seeing me get emotional on cam while reading this because this is what this website has allowed us: our very own community.

        Gahhhh #feelings

  4. Camp was amazing. It went beyond my expectations. The experience and the lasting effects it’s had on my life continues to amaze and astound me. I just want to buy you all a pony! Thank you! From the bottom of my heart, thank you!

  5. I would just like to say that I havent read this yet and don’t plan to until laaaater, cause all of the comments add a totally new dimension to these recaps (and really all AS pieces). A-CAMP: AVRIL 2013 :D

  6. Jeez Riese make me cry will you?

    “how much we felt seen by one another in a way we never felt seen in the rest of the world.”

    This, exactly.

    • that quote exactly. The most amazing inclusive environment, and yeah the recap made me cry too :’)

  7. You all have left fingerprints on my wee little queer heart. Thank you, I love you.
    Once more with feeling! Thank you, I love you.

  8. Riese, look! I comment now, all the time!
    Even when I’m [redacted] and shouldn’t be typing anything at all anywhere.

  9. I texted Grace the following on the Tuesday after camp, when we were both processing back and forth, and I think this is the recap where I’ll throw it out there, because it was really fresh and true for me in that moment:

    “Would you believe that some of the best parts of camp for me were seeing the team interact? I was trying to put it into words last night, how seeing that family together and knowing how it was looking out for us made me feel, and I couldn’t, really.
    [Camp was] kind of purity. Bigger and intimate all at once. I’ve never been a part of such a positive, uncynical experience before.
    A-Camp is like a Patronus.”

    And, dudes, I didn’t meet my soulmate at Camp, I didn’t break any beds, see any bears, have a quality conversation with Laneia (September, lady, I’m coming to High Tea) or finish a bottle of whiskey without several devoted whiskey pals’ help. But I did experience that thing Riese talks about, a feeling of believing in something massive/so small as to exist in the deepest parts of yourself, and how that feeling creates bonds between people. You guys have really made something beautiful, and special, and we can see it every time that you’re together…on the site, and out in the woods/WORLD. And you should be really fucking proud.

    I think I said to Barb and Sondra on the drive back, “I don’t really feel like I need to be a part of that inner A-family…I’m just really glad they’ve got our backs, you know?”

  10. Camp is important. I feel so guilty taking a spot away from someone else for Camp 2.0, but I’m selfish enough to do it anyway. I need to be there if I’m going to keep breathing.

    • “I need to be there if I’m going to keep breathing”

      This is exactly how I feel and I didn’t even go.

  11. I’m in.

    (thank you for not scheduling it the same weekend as my cousin’s wedding, that is still appreciated).

    Also if there’s a partial/total nudity cabin, I want to be in that one (Annika’s sounds PERFECT). As any Chistraddler can attest, I have a penchant for pantslessness. You’re not a real Chistraddler until you’ve seen me in my undies (American Eagle trunks, usually). Which means, oddly enough, former intern Elli was a bit behind…?

    I do, however, apologize in advance for the fact that I will be having friends text me updates on North Central roller derby regionals. AS trumps derby, but the combination is best!

    • Haha, I was in Annika’s cabin and I can totally attest that the modestly seriously lasted about 12 hours. The ironic part is that I put on my camp preferences “no nudists please.” BUT I WAS TOTALLY COOL WITH ALL THE NAKEDNESS, LADIES.

  12. So yeah I shed a couple tears while reading this. So what? Judge me! I love A-Camp!

    • A-Camp was definitely a home away from home for me. I have never felt more comfortable with myself and my life. People at A-Camp were genuine, awesome, hot, funny, smart, and hot (did I say hot? There were a lot of attractive ladies). I can never express my gratitude to Autostraddle for making their huge gay dream of creating a camp into reality. This little Utahan who thought she was all alone now has a gay family spreading all over the United States and parts of Canada, Australia, and London. So thank you.

      • Oh and one more thing, LITTLE RASCALS FOR LIFE!!! Love you girls! Laura don’t look so scared on my shoulders, many girls would kill to be in that position. (zing)

  13. a-camp 2.0 is at the best possible time for me: after i move to LA, but before grad school starts!!! thank you for meeting the needs you didn’t even know i had.

  14. This was so beautiful!!! I’ve loved reading these recaps. UTOPIA!

    I am SO SAD that I won’t be able to make it to camp this September. I’m pretty sure I’ll be walking around in a fog for the next few weeks (or possibly until I register for Spring A-camp?). Is there any chance that the next spring camp will be in LA as well?

  15. Seriously you guys, A-Camp was one of the best experiences of my entire 25.7 years of existence. I don’t care where I am in September. I can somehow be working on freaking Mars, but you can bet I will commandeer a space craft of some kind and crash land my way back to Angelus Oaks for A-Camp 2.0! <3

  16. I WILL find a way to get to A-camp next time… Reading about A-camp has been inspiring, so I’m sure the real thing will be even better.

  17. Riese, I’m seriously considering your suggestion to rob a bank to get to the next camp. Also, thank you for your beautiful words that obviously resonate in all our hearts. Feelings forever!!

  18. Am I the only one that checked the calendar and noticed this starts on a weds? An extra day of camp? I couldn’t make the first one because of work in Toronto but I will register for the sept one if I can snag a spot!

  19. I am so choked up from reading this, and I just feel so blessed to have experienced camp and all of the beautiful campers that attended. Thank you for the ending section Riese, it was perfect. Getting to play a small role in making this happen was more rewarding than I ever could have expected. I so look forward to 2.0 <3

  20. I didn’t go to camp, but riese’s thing still made me cry…this website has seriously been a huge resource for me for the past year and a half, it helped me come out and at least begin to explore who I am within the confines of a conservative town. one day, I will get to camp and meet the truly awesome people that have changed my life from behind a computer screen. I love everyone on this website* without even meeting them!

    *except for the trolls that got hotdogs. but that was still really funny.

  21. Also I just did the complex math required to convert real life time into an Art Institute schedule, and I realized that A-Camp 2.0 falls over the exact day of my final portfolio review for school. The one that if I don’t go to, I am not permitted to graduate college.

    Ouch. My heart. That’s the last week that I actually have to be physically in school ever again in my life.

    But the fact that this exists and will continue to exist is still amazing. One day, A-camp. One day.

    Additionally I cannot get over the amount of stylish pairs of shoes in these pictures. You guys are doing something right.


        I think I’m moving to L. A. when I graduate too (literally 2 weeks after a-camp 2.0 happens) so I hope they don’t take everyone’s advice and finally have an a-camp on the east coast… … … … because it’s definitely all about me.

  22. Oh nostalgia… I remember following Riese’s blog in 2007 and watching the VLOGs thinking: “I wish I could meet these people, or have friends like these people. This is what life should be like.” I remember reading Autostraddle as soon as it went online, wondering why something like it didn’t already exist. I remember the Rodeo Disco looking like so much fun in 2009, but I was too young (like the interns), so I didn’t go. Then I remember marching with a group of friends at the National Equality March and yelling “GO AUTOSTRADDLE” when I saw you all down the street – Katrina looked at me like a crazy person before shouting it back. I’ve been reading ever since (which also includes finding the courage to come out to the world, moving to NYC all on my own, and finding a girlfriend through AS). I didn’t go to camp because I felt like I would still be a weirdo outsider. But, I’ll be pre-registering and getting plane tickets this time.

    I applaud you all. I’m so glad that I YouTube searched: “L Word Parody Vlog” all those years ago. You’ve come so far! #feelings

    • This so much, thank you! i think there are so many readers here that have been around since the vlog/lword parody days and we are all just so proud and cant believe what riese and her team have accomplished.

      I didnt go to camp. I am not even a registered user here. but I read this website everyday and I feel like I know you people and I love you.

      In 2010, I went to NYC to visit a friend for new years eve. I was just coming out to my closest friends but no one else. I was getting off the train from long island into the city and who passed me? alex vega. alex motherfucking vega. in real life!!! i said nothing. i was afraid of looking ridiculous/weird/crazy etc…but all i wanted to do was shout “semicolon! nobody’s ready for winter!!by the way can we be friends?” luckily somewhere in my rational mind, i realized that was inappropriate. in reality i was a stranger but she and riese, stef, haviland et al. seemed like who i wanted to be if I could ever get there and they meant so much to me during that time. to this day, i still sort of feel like alex vega was my gay angel…assuring me just by walking by me that this world is smaller than i think, and these people I relate to so much are real and not so far away after all. that must be what camp felt like but multiplied by infinity. i hope to be a part of it someday.

      thanks so much for all your hard work making camp happen. it makes everything seem possible.

  23. “… how much we felt seen by one another in a way we never felt seen in the rest of the world.”

    “I’d always thought that I’d lived my life to get to the writing, but it turned out I’d done the writing to get to my life.”

    Words like these are what make Autostraddle my very favorite website. Out of all the thousands of millions of sites out there, this is the one that I feel like understands me. (That sounds crazy but y’all know what I mean.)

    I don’t know that I’ll ever be able to come to an A-Camp, but I will always love reading about them.

  24. Hannah Hart sitting on my lap for all of 5 seconds was indeed a magical (if drunkenly hazy) moment, but it is most definitely eclipsed by SO MANY OTHER beautiful/hilarious/goosebumpy moments that really made A-Camp the incredible experience that it was.

    Sad the recaps are over but so fired up for September!

    Also, Sharks for life.

    • just realized I’m really excited to hear you say ‘squirt’ again in your american accent.

  25. Can I say I love the file name for the picture of our lyrics.


    • I can’t believe my handwriting is on Autostraddle.

      Also, how long it took us to come up with “safe space, gay face”. We wait for perfection.

      I also still feel guilty for hurriedly writing a billion copies of that while Riese was like “everyone pay lots of attention right now” and I was 2 feet away, clearly not paying any attention. I am sorry! I have a guilty conscience. I want to give Riese all the attention all the time.

      • Oh god, that must’ve taken us like an hour to get “safe space, gay face”. And to explain what we were working on. “WE NEED FOUR SYLLABLES, TWO WORDS. TWO WORDS THAT HAVE TWO SYLLABLES EACH TO MAKE FOUR SYLLABLES. WE’RE REPLACING ‘STREELIGHTS, PEOPLE’. THIS SHOULDN’T BE THAT DIFFICULT.”

  26. This recap made me cry. All the feelings of wonderfulness!
    Basically A-Camp changed my life. I came back a more confident person and more comfortable in my queerness. I literally wanted to shout “I am gay and I effing love it!” every where I went. I went from knowing zero lady-gays to knowing many and formed long lasting friendships with them (I will be moving in with 3 of my cabin-mates come fall). 21 Hump Street for life!
    This was the best experience of my life thus far and I can’t wait to do it again in September! :)

  27. These re-caps…..just….wow. Thank you to everyone on AS and on our FB group for helping me re-live the best weekend of my life.

  28. omg . . . Taylor’s note <3

    also Taylor, your documentation of your trip to camp inspired me to make plans to take the train from the Bay area up to Portland to visit my best friend this summer. I'm already sort of thinking about what train snacks to bring.

    I guess I have until September to come up with a really good lie for my parents about where I'll be. (!!!)

  29. I’ll be switching coasts to the west one in a year-ish… hopefully i can go then…

  30. I had to stop and comment before finishing to ensure I am credited with the initial idea to carry around a banana in a Banangrams bag because that was one of my best jokes of A Camp and I riffed about it for roughly three minutes. I will also probably use it as a gag at some point so let the record show that though Taylor is the one that ate a shit ton of bananas, this is my joke. Thank you for your patience and understanding in this matter.

    • Unrelated to this story, but a serious highlight of camp for me:
      Brittani: Hey, would it be weird if I ask you for a beer?
      Me: Sure! This is amazing, but also so weird, you guys are all celebrities to me.
      Brittani: Wait, is that YOUR trunk of booze right there?
      Me: Oh, yeah.
      Brittani: No, YOU are the celebrity!

  31. you guys some how magically matched all of the cabins perfectly

    not once did i hear “omg so and so in my cabin sucks” or “i really don’t like my cabin”

    i think every single person said “my cabin is the best cabin ever” at least once during camp

    that was magical
    i made at least 4 bffs within like 15 minutes of being at camp

    and i still think the sharks were the best cabin

    come at me bro

  32. This was beautiful. I love this site because I can tell everyone behind it is so human and I loved reading the bit about the interns. Sometimes I feel like faceless robots write some of my favorite blogs.

    I’m so sad that I won’t be able to make my absence go unnoticed for five days at the beginning of the semester. BUT ONE DAY I WILL BE THERE.

  33. it’s too bad “shark” “the shark” have too many letters for a knuckle tattoo

    (I’m anxious it will fill up if you couldn’t tell from capslock)

    • this question is really really important to all of us weirdos from “the continent” too!

      • dude, flights are at about 800€ right now! I so wanna get this over with before I have time to think about how fucking expensive it’s gonna be.

        • oh my.
          if we get our spots/go we should really not only stay the week-end. I vote San Francisco. seriously though.

          • oh yeah, if I have to pay that much to get me there it’s not just gonna be for a weekend.
            I’ve been to SF a few times and loved it so I was also thinking of maybe going there after camp. but seeing the date I just realized that my father and his very lovely(ahem) new wife are gonna be there till the end of semptember. and I just know that I will totes bumb into him even in a big city like that and that might raise some questions about why on earth I’m about 10000miles away from where I’m suppose to be. but will see

          • hm, you could be a paid city guide for someone who has never been to SF! ;)

            I am so nervous about this, already!!

          • well now that I’m over 21 I have to discover the city again from a totally different angle

          • I am also making the trip over & looking for a few extra days to spend, so San Francisco might be a goer :D

  35. This is so fucking inspiring that I just upped my monthly donation to Autostraddle! We will change the world!

  36. First of all, I’m freaking out ’cause there’s now three pictures of me on Autostraddle through these recaps WHICH IS FREAKING AWESOME.
    Secondly, Little Rascals for life! I fucking love all of you, and I honestly hope we can meet up again even if it’s not through camp and it’s just crashing on each other’s couches for a few days when we need to get out of wherever we are.

    Riese, you’re amazing. Honestly, I was about in tears by the end of this.

    Laura and Jaime, you’re the best counselors ever and though I can’t come in September, I hope you two are my counselors next time around.

  37. Crying. Again. Just like I did basically all day Sunday. (Sorry to those poor campers in my van.. I could say I was tired, but I think most of me was genuinely sad that camp came and went like the blink of an eye for me and I felt very helpless that the last few hours were out of my hands.)

    I didn’t write anything for this day because I don’t like thinking about the last day, but this was really nice. Especially the ending Riese. Thank you! I’m so honored to be part of this and I’m so very excited to be planning for Camp 2.0!!!

    • I was in your van. It was totally fine. I ate New England Clam Chowder in California and did not have to sit in the airport for 12 hours.

      I would just like to say that my flight wasn’t until 11:20pm and after Carrie left me all alone in the world I couldn’t find ANYONE. I went to the bookstore looking for queers but apparently no one likes to read and I was in the wrong place.

      • Awww, sorry Brianna! I’m still bummed you weren’t on the same flight as Daniela, Morgan and I!

    • @Robin I very much enjoyed getting to know you better and hear your perspective on camp sitting behind you in the van!

  38. whoa memories of that first rodeo disco just came way back.
    that was so fun and so glad that happened. I still can’t figure out how we all slept in one hotel room.

    Now i want to go to camp!

  39. I remember seeing the pride and the rodeo pictures and aching. Maybe to meet the autostraddle team specifically or just other queer women: something midwest withheld, who knew. I couldn’t figure it out. But I’ve been growing up, loving [you] for your collective writing voice. I hadn’t thought of meeting you, like it hadn’t occurred to me we live on the same planet or in the same era. But at camp, pow! There you were: real people who I already felt this affection towards. And sitting near you guys, sometimes saying nothing and sometimes being much too loud: d’oh, I dunno. I’m trying to write you a love letter.

    • I remember your amazing, awestruck reaction when we got there. You were like OMG THIS IS FOR REAL CAN YOU BELIEVE IT. It was like we had discovered Narnia or something. And in a way, it kind of felt like we did.

  40. I have been reading basically all the articles on this website, checking for new ones like everyday, for about the past two years. I think I commented like once or twice, but the A-Camp recaps are so amazingly awesome that I finally decided it was time for me to become a member. Thank you for being there for all of us peoples Autostraddle, for explaining things to me that I wasn’t aware I didint understand, for making me laugh with your hilarious recaps on bad days, and smile with your continually awesome articles. Ur da best. Every person who is a part of Autostraddle is a cool bean.

  41. I had too many feelings about this so I put them here:

    “Pulling away from camp in Robin’s van that afternoon I put on a brave face while I refused to look behind us or into the rearview mirror, in the interest of avoiding a shotgun talent show of my new-found bawling skills in front of the people I told could trust me to navigate them to Los Angeles. Robin wore her captain’s hat and it felt very official. We descended from camp at a safe speed but eventually we grew a tail of cars so long that we had to forfeit the mountain-scale game of Snake and pull over to let everyone pass. A man hung out his window and obnoxiously clapped at us and I thought, ‘Grow up, asshole, you will never understand how much fun we had this weekend.'”

  42. no but seriously what is it that we all have in common? like, outside the queerness? i still can’t pinpoint it. but i love it.

    • I think there is a definite huge amount of niceness, intelligence and hilariousness- but especially niceness- that seems to exist amoungst the writers and community of this site, and more tangibly here than anywhere else on the internet and many many places in real life too (and also thus, A-Camp would be and obviously was seriously just that fucking good!). Yes.

  43. I wrote and rewrote this comment several times and I couldn’t get what I want to say exactly right, but I guess I’m kind of jealous I wasn’t there and kind of jealous that there’s no way in hell I can make the next two either, but I’m also so full of love right now for everyone, even though I’ve never met any of you. I guess the love everyone has for each other is just kind of infectious. I love your love.

    • “I guess the love everyone has for each other is just kind of infectious. I love your love.” – Exactly how I feel too.

  44. You’re all amazing. And so good looking. How are you all this good looking? I’m pretty sure that ‘people from the internet’ aren’t meant to be this good looking. But there you all are.

    Anyway, I have a question. Would I be a douche if I bought a ticket not knowing whether I’d be able to make it or not? I’d give it to someone else if I couldn’t. My job is sort of ‘interesting’ and maybe I could go in September but maybe also not. I want to go so badly, but I also don’t want to be a dick to my fellow straddlers. Is buying a ticket under these circumstances a dick move?

    • um, that’s what I’m going to do. If you can’t make it I’m sure they will be able to transfer your place to someone else (until a certain point before the camp).
      I’m not even sure where I’ll be living in September but I don’t want to miss Camp!

      • the $50 registration deposits are non-refundable, but if you end up needing to cancel, then all you have to do is cancel! and the next person on the waitlist will be contacted about a spot opening up and they will be given the opportunity to register if they still want to. after a certain date however there would be no refunds of any part of your tuition nor would we be able to bring in anyone new on the waitlist.

        • awesome Riese, thanks for the info.

          that works for great for me, and if it didn’t work out the $50 would just be like a donation to autostraddle which i’d be happy to make anyhow.

  45. I swear, if it takes all my savings from the last 5, and next 2 years, I will go to a-camp one year. It just sounds so fucking magical.

  46. Just a quick note to say thank you. Thank you for everything you do, for inspiring, for creating, for making yourself vulnerable, and for being. I was thinking the other day, that so many people have so many great ideas but so few people act on them. I would have LOVED something like this when I was coming out.

    I write a weekly list of events in NYC to help create a sense of community. If anyone wants to be on it, please email me at [email protected]. Just a few weeks ago, my gf and I met a girl who went to cubby hole alone for the first time.. We helped introduce her to some people. She’s a brave one. I know how hard it is to come out. I created different lesbian events/groups to give girls a chance to meet other women.. anyways, THANK YOU Autostraddle for helping create a community… thank you !!:)

  47. My birthday is on the 23rd so it could be argued that A-Camp 2.0 is a totally reasonable birthday present to myself, yes?

  48. I cried a little while reading this post and I never even got to go! However, come hell or high water I’m GOING to A-camp 2.0 and crying over it ending in PERSON dammit!!

    This is also my very first comment after over a year of lurking! :D …I think I’m going through something here guys.

  49. It makes me a little sad that being 18, about to start uni in October and living in the UK means I more than likely wont ever make it to camp, but honestly even the re-caps have been special.

    • This happened to me when I was 18 with the buffy.com meet ups (too young, too poor, too far away). It really sucks if you can’t make it to A-Camp just now but know that some day there will be something else you love with all your heart, and you will be old enough and financially stable enough to go this time, and it will feel so so much more amazing because you know how valuable it is. (This is the reason I will be roughly comatose with joy if I get a place on Monday. It is worth waiting for.)

  50. Even though I didn’t go to camp, reading these recaps has made me so happy for everyone that went and I think it’s really nice for that everyone is able to share these experiences with the ones who couldn’t go.

  51. These recaps are amazing. I dont think Ill have the vacation time for camp in September, so sad :[

    P.S. I lost track of the number of undercuts I saw in all these pictures, so awesome. Lookin’ fierce ladies!

  52. <3 I have so much love for this.
    like this much…
    <3 <3 <3 <3 <3 <3 <3 <3 <3 <3 <3 <3 <3 <3 <3 <3 x 100,000,000.

  53. I didn’t get to go to A Camp… Unfortunately. I’m hoping to go to one ASAP and school everyone in basketball. It looked awesome.

      • This for reals! I usually run 3-5 miles 4X a week. First day on that mountain, I hit the 2 mile mark and laid down on the trail and cried before crawling back to my cabin.

  54. Ok guys so I gave a presentation today at a symposium, and they announced the top 3 presenters and I was in the top 3, and then they said that they only had a prize for number 1 and it was $500 and it was not me, sadly.


    Moral of the story, don’t halfass your shit, people.

  55. A few of my comments from the post-camp survey are on here, which makes me super happy. But also reading through them all I was like “wait, did I write this? did I write that? did I write all of this? none of this?” we are all such kindred spirits!! And it’s not an accident.

  56. at AC v2.0 you should have a scheduled “saying goodbye to the new loves of your life” hour or two

    even though i spent the entire last day sitting around doing nothing, i didn’t feel like i got to adequately say goodbye to anyone

    and im not really one for crying but when gabby said “momma luvs yew” as she powerwalked the wrong way up the board walk i almost cried a lil bit

  57. I don’t care where I am or what situation I’m in come September, I am so absolutely going to A-camp in September. Plus for some reason, I feel like going on a hellishly long train ride down would be kind of fun, even though I know I’d probably just end up bored after around 3 hours. Still, though! A-camp!

  58. Thank you for writing these recaps. I laughed a lot, I almost cried, I felt warm and fuzzy inside… and I got even more super excited to attend, even if it’s not for a few years. But I have confidence that this ‘first A-Camp magic’ will translate into ‘ongoing A-Camp’ magic which shall ensure Camp is still running by the time my funds are together. I’m more worried about not getting a spot.. I gotta get that shit on lock!

    The posts have been beautiful though, thanks. :)

    Ps. Also, I’m not going to lie.. I had many reasons to read le recaps, but one of them was so that I could finally see a close-up photo of Hot Laura. And can I just say that the embroidery photo- yes, the one with the subtle concentration grimace- is totally adorable. Also, Hot Laura is indeed hot. The end.

  59. Reading about all of your camp feelings makes me want so badly to have those feelings. And I sort of lurk here mostly and I don’t know any of you, but a day will come when I can come to A-Camp.

  60. oh it hurts my little heart to know i wasn’t there but i’m happy you all went and acted like real people and made it out alive. someday i’ll go but probably not because economy. :(

  61. I haven’t even written my thank you note and we are starting all over again/making plans for Sep!

    But I love you all, whether or not I am physically present at AM come the Fall.

  62. I saw someone walking down Piedmont Ave in Oakland like 2 days ago in an A Camp shirt…..not like I was insanely jealous or anything

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