Autostraddle’s Ultimate Holigay Gift Guide 2014: What We Want

Mey, Trans Editor

Plus-size Velvet Everything

Seriously, is there anything better than velvet? I mean, probably, yeah, but velvet clothes are still really great. Luckily, Modcloth has a bunch, including some great plus-size stuff. Just look at this gorgeous Lady Love Song Dress in Merlot Velvet. That’s how you make a femme statement. Or for everyday wear, there’s this Inspire Yourself Skirt in Merlot and Fine and Sandy Blazer in Black Velvet. They even have a retro swimsuit in velvet!

Virgen de Guadalupe Statue

My five La Virgen candles, prayer cards and framed picture don’t quite make the shrine that I’d like. This statuewill be a welcome addition.

Make Love to Rage and other books

I can’t remember the last Christmas where I didn’t ask for and receive books, and I’m not about to start this year. Top on my list is Morgan Robyn Collado’s book of poetry Make Love to Rage. I’m also looking forward to the man behind The Mountain Goats John Darnielle’s debut novel Wolf in White Van. When it comes to comics, I’d love to get Volume Four of both the interstellar family fantasy/war story/adventure/romance Saga and Matt Fraction’s Hawkeye, which is probably the best comic about a male superhero out there today (but I mean, it is a lot about Kate Bishop Hawkeye too).

Nostalgia Electrics KPM200 Kettle Popcorn Popper

I love popcorn. It’s literally one of my three favorite foods. And this popcorn popper is the Queen of All Popcorn Poppers. Plus, if I had this, all I’d need was a balloon arch, a dancing bear and a few hundred queers and I could have my very own A-Camp Carnival.

Brittani, Sports and Comedy Editor


Henley Shirt

I feel like I have a few signature looks but all of them can either be lumped into off season lax bro or really cool substitute teacher. I’d like to expand my look with Henley shirts. They’re simple, they’re able to be layered but also not too thick to wear in the spring, and you can get them for cheap. I have yet to try one on so I’m really hoping they’re flattering on me.

Adidas Headband

I’m currently on a basketball team called The Beatdown and our uniform color is green. I sweat a lot and rather than wiping my forehead with my shirt, I should probably get a headband.

Yale Hat

I used to have a Navy blue Yale fitted but it somehow got bent up to a point that I couldn’t wear it anymore. I think I gave it to someone who had less restrictive presentation standards. Anyway, I want a new one and since I’m very into wearing my hats backwards right now (see first paragraph re: lax bro) I think this one would be dope.

Kaitlyn, Contributing Editor

Coat Rack

I almost feel ashamed coming right out the gate asking for a coat rack, but…nah. My girl and I U-Hauled in June, and when all our winter gear was stuffed in the closet, there was no issue. Now that it’s getting chilly, we’ve got coats and hats and scarves and gloves draped over just about every furniture item in our apartment. To me, a coat rack is not only a practical solution to our biggest wintertime problem; it’s also the ultimate marker of adulthood. I mean, an entire piece of furniture for organizing your winter outerwear? It’s so responsible. I need it.

Grill Pan

I watch a lot of Chopped and have developed an obsession with searing perfect grill marks into all of my food. This pan would help me reach that goal, as well as my dream of eating steak for every meal for the rest of my life.

Drapey, Comfy Cardigan

Last month I bought a pair of pants that I imagine wearing with this cardigan. They’re fairly average black high-waisted pants, but I can just tell how good (and COMFY) I’d look wearing them with a tan v-neck, long necklace and this cardigan on top.

Xbox One Assassin’s Creed Unity Bundle

When I was moving from Chicago to New York earlier this year, I spent a few weeks at home with my parents in Virginia. I was bored out of my mind when everyone was at work/school, so I spent a lot of that time playing Assassin’s Creed on my sister’s Xbox. When I left, I found a gaping void in my life that can only be filled by traveling through time killing people and traveling cities parkour-style. I keep trying to trick my sister into giving her console to me, but that doesn’t seem to be working (she’s weirdly immune to mind control) so I guess the next best option is to get one of my own. And this one comes with the new Assassin’s Creed! What a steal.

Laura, Contributing Editor


Honeycomb Earring

These are really pretty and kind of nerdy! We belong together.

Object d’Artifact Keepsake Box

Did I ever tell you that I decorated my bathroom in a dinosaur theme? But, like, classy adult-type dinosaurs, with a chartreuse and cedar color scheme. This box would look so good holding my bobby pins, right?

The Walking Dead – A TellTale Games Series for Xbox 360

I still haven’t played the first game in this series, even though a) I love The Walking Dead, b) this game is supposed to be amazing, and c) the main character, Clementine, looks just like my little sister, certified badass. And there a million used copies floating around now, so it should be cheap and easy to get this for me!

Neato XV-21 Pet & Allergy Automatic Vacuum Cleaner

Year number two of living with a dog: there are no surprises left. Just hair. Any human looking at my clothes can immediately tell you that my home life is ruled by a dog with light brown fur. I just want to be able to wear black sweaters again.

Heather, Senior Editor


To Accomplish Sticky Note Packet

Confession: I cannot process the demands of the world unless I write everything I need to do down on a piece of paper with my own hand. I’ve tried every digital thing under the sun and those kinds of apps and programs and websites only stress me out to the max. This slick little notepad of variety seems like just what my addled ADHD brain needs to relax for a second.

Caribbean Blue Cast Iron Dutch Oven

The main way I stay alive in the winter is by cooking one thousand soups. Recipes always say to use a dutch oven but I just use a big ol’ pot because I don’t own a dutch oven. But I sure would love to own a dutch oven, especially one that is the color of the Caribbean so I can be reminded of my first foray into lesbian scissoring every time I’m cooking.

Middle Earth: Shadow of Mordor for PlayStation 4

I didn’t buy this when it came out because I didn’t believe a LotR-licensed game could live up to the hype, which broke my heart a little bit because open-world RPGs are my lifeblood, man. And also, I am obsessed with Middle Earth. But now Shadow of Mordor is making everyone’s list of Best Games of 2014 and I wasted $50 on Thief.

Complete Set of 16 Minifigures from The Lego Movie

Everything would be awesome if I had this complete set of Lego Movie Minifigs. Everything would be cool if you were part of a team that made that happen. Everything would be awesome if I were living my dream of displaying these lovingly on the Lego shelf above my desk. (If you don’t know that Tegan and Sara song from The Lego Movie, shame on you!)

Lights for My Bike

I’ve had more bike stuff stolen since I moved to New York City than everything the Riddler stole from Gotham City in the whole history of ever. Like my whole bike, for starters. And then components from my replacement bike. And helmets and seats and seatposts and bells and lights and I don’t even know what all anymore. But I’ve rebuilt a third bike and now all I need is to not get hit by a taxi when I’m riding home from the gym.

Pages: 1 2 3 4 5 See entire article on one page

auto has written 464 articles for us.


  1. every year when we do this i am so jealous of other people’s finely-tuned commercial desires. y’all have such good lists! i need to get on your level, but first i wanna get that french press.

  2. Rachel, Lynda Barry’s Syllabus is FANTASTIC! I am a gigantic Lynda Barry fan, I’ve even briefly met her and she’s more amazing in person than you might imagine! This new book of her’s is so inspiring. I follow the tumblr that most of the material in the book is from, so I’ve seen it, but put all together it made me so excited about creating things. I wanted to write a book after reading it. Its has so many wonderful writing exercises! <3

  3. Ooohh so many things to ask for. I second the bose headphones. I have the active one, it is sweat and water resistant. They are holding up really well after about 1.5 years of constant gym use.

    Also if you like boots you might want to take a peek at seavees.

    But what I want most on my list is for all of you to buy those YDY stickers!!!!!!!!!! =)

  4. i thought smartwool was great until i was introduced to darn tough. they are made in vermont and, last i checked, have a lifetime guarantee. where all of my smartwool socks are filled with holes, my darn toughs are still super intact. y’all…these socks are amazing…also, i realize an unhealthy portion of my life is spent thinking about socks.

    • I used to sell hiking socks, amongst other things. I appreciate a good quality long lasting, comfy, wicking sock. On extreme PMT days when I was very stressed I occasionally would tear up selling particularly excellent merino wool based socks.

      And now I’m sharing this on the Internet.

    • Oooh this is good to know! I have generally been dismissive of DT socks because the only time I’ve had them they were sort of icky little sport socks that were too small, but maybe they are worth giving another shot!

    • Definitely putting these on my Christmas list! Continuing a trend from last year, when my brother gave me a pair of hiking socks and also a can opener that doesn’t work. This year, I’ll settle for socks with a lifetime guarantee, and he can keep his defective kitchen gadgets to himself.

  5. I just, like a few days ago, learned that cold brew coffee is a thing and totally just bought that pot. Can’t wait to start whipping up homemade, dairy-free frappuccinos (in my new misandrist shirt!)

  6. Laneia! I have that bag! I rarely use it because it’s way bigger than I imagined in would be and it’s hard to get into on the go because you have to use the buttons. But it’s gorgeous and when I’m traveling, it holds all of my things without forcing me to lug a giant backpack around!

  7. I second the Klipsch X11. I had the X5 before it hit its demise the second time in the wash cycle, and it is the best in ears I have ever used. They are so small, light and comfortable. I can only imagine how much nicer the X7(replaced the X5) and X11 are with the better quality cable. I may try and see if I can get the X7/11 cables swapped onto my X5.

  8. How did I not know that Rocky Horror makeup existed?

    I’ll be off now, contemplating the general incompleteness of my life.

    Perhaps it’s shallow and materialistic to think that lipstick could improve my life . . . but I’ll never know until I try.

  9. I bought the Winterberry Tart Coat years ago (maybe 5?) and I STILL LOVE IT SO MUCH. It’s a gorgeous colour, a beautiful cut with a really fun asymmetric hem, a great collar that you can button up to your neck, cute (*hand made*) leather details, wonderful deep pockets, and is so flattering. I still get compliments on it, and it has held up to the test of time so well!

  10. Kate, you are a genius and I hope you get that Drake shirt because you truly deserve it.

    And Chelsey, I totally almost put Texts from Jane Eyre on my list, but I left it off because I already had too many things, so I’m glad you put it!

  11. Oh gosh I just put flannel sheets on my bed last night and it is THE best–not only are they incredibly soft but the weight also helps them stay where you put them, so even notorious sheet-twisters (…like me) wake up in properly layered bedding instead of in a tangle of whatever blankets didn’t fall off the bed. It’s miraculous, really.

Contribute to the conversation...

You must be logged in to post a comment.