The Comment Awards Are Suited and Booted

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Hi, muffins! We got through the week! I’m so proud of us!

This week, Fonseca reviewed Lizzie, which is extremely relevant to your interests if you’re at all into lesbians, Kristen Stewart, or misandry.

You might need to make these dark chocolate sea salt cranberry nut bars from Femme Brûlée. 

OMG: How To Give (Or Get) a Strap-On Blow Job

Not a fan of the gym? A.E.’s got all the nerd gear we’ll need to make it through.

This was the best Friday Open Thread! You all have the best types!

Oh hey, nothing to see here, it’s just a Style Thief for KAT. SANDOVAL. IN. BLACK. TIE. I am now a ghost.

And then there were your comments!


On Monday Roundtable: What Reality Show/Game Show Would You Destroy?

The Not Here to Make Gal Pals Award to Jeanna:

Oh, I read this as literally destroy, like go in and set fire to, and, The Bachelor. Although honestly I could probably get pretty far on The Bachelor (I’m gay but I feel like 25 years of fundamentalist Christianity trained me for that shit). I’d go in and try to find the other stealth queer ladies and fuck shit up and stage a coup.

On Also.Also.Also: Lesbian Jesus Hayley Kiyoko, Queer Parenting in Appalachia, and Other Stories You Can’t Miss:

The Poptarts from Appalachia Award to Snaelle:

I read “Lesbian Jesus Hayley Kiyoko queer parenting in Appalachia”, and let me tell you that was a trip.

On How To Give (Or Get) a Strap-On Blow Job:

The Packing List Award to Adèle:

I had a great time exploring afemmecock.com, and now I’ll never look at a woman in a short skirt the same way ever again. They could be packin’…. so intriguing.

On I Demand a Lesbian Cop Show Spinoff of “The End of the F**king World”:

The Overnight Shipping Award to Sally:

But there’s a special erogenous zone within our lesbian loins dedicated entirely to the sensation of “two fictional firearm-toting women fighting fictional crime and also having realistic sex.” If untreated, this area of our desire map risks extinction. Not to take issue with these perfect sentences, but I think this loinal area will remain healthy because of our collective habit you alluded to earlier, of shipping any power-suited female cops in close proximity to each other. In fact, this part of loin is probably overdeveloped already. I mean, if we were serious about solving global hunger, we would take this piece of loin, sauté it with garlic and feed it to the world.

On This Queer House, Vol 10: New Year, Newly Organized Queer House:

The Inspector Catdget Award to Adèle:

I love your inspectors, do they freelance ?

And on 25 Pictures Technically Not of Lesbian Sex According to Stock Photography:

The Tool for the Job Award to Beth M and Citali Salazar:

Beth: Tag yourself. I’m “Not Sure Who Is Supposed to Make the First Move” ¯\_(ツ)_/¯ / Salazar: I'm the dildo

And the Urge to Merge Award to innaffiare:

Two things: 1) This is the best thing I’ve seen on the internet in a while, and it prompted me to FINALLY get A+ — I’d been meaning to for a while, and this post really epitomized my feelings of “autostraddle is my favorite place to be online, no matter how trash everything else is, autostraddle will always be there with something amazing.” 2) I sent this to my fiancé because she and I have this ongoing joke where, whenever we do something non-sexual but weird (example: try to fit into a bathrobe together to become a monster) one of us goes, “This is how lesbians have sex.” * *Note: if becoming a bathrobe monster IS how you have sex, I am so in support of you and am not trying to shame you. Party on.


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24 Comments

    • Which probably translates into hot women in power suits, preferably almost,possibly, finally kissing on the mouth.
      By the collective holding of breath CO2 Emissions will be reduced.
      And all showers taken are of the cold variety.

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