The Comment Awards Are Meeting at The Planet

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Hi kittens! What if it were already winter we got to wear scarves and go ice-skating and sip warm drinks? What if that?

This week, Katrinaย took us to gym class!

Stephanie and her friends reenacted The L Word – or at leastย the part that happened at The Planet. No word on the crying, drinking, fighting…well. No word on the rest of it.

Noraย wants your best fall looks!

Breaking up is hard to do, but Molly’s here for youย with this playlist.

Vintage. Lesbian. Smut.

Carmen wants you to watchย Star, a show starring noted heterosexual Queen Latifah.

Heather’s gotย a review of the Billie Jean King biopic,ย Battle of the Sexes!

And then there were your comments.


Onย Grease Bats: Family:

The Know Her, Do Her, Be Her Award to Alaina and Al:

Alaina: we all know a str8 karen. / Al: Some of us may have even BEEN str8 Karen.

Onย I Made All My Friends Reenact The Planet From โ€œThe L Wordโ€ for a Week and Now Everyone Hates Me:

The Very Shane Today Award to Frankie:

I hate myself for this but I genuinely found myself attracted to fake Shane. I thought I was better than thisโ€ฆ

And the OurChart Award to Rous Rose:

The fact that you contractually bound everyone to hang out with you kind of sounds like an Alice thing to do, Stephanie.

Onย No Filter: Bella Thorne Wins the Thirst Games:

The Team Ortberg Award to Carmen SanDiego, donnamartingraduates, and Kiki:

Carmen SanDiego: Wow people here are really into Mallory Ortberg. / donnamartingraduates: join us Carmen! / Kiki: Is there somewhere people aren't into Mallory Ortberg?

Onย Pop Culture Fix: โ€œPretty Little Liarsโ€ Is Spinning Off With Ali and Mona:

The Immortality, My Darlings Award to Katie:

Queer Girl: Oh Marlene King, you've become the Ilene Chaiken of teen shows. / Katie: In TV, you either die a hero or live long enough to become Ilene Chaiken. / Al: Haha, nearly fell off my seat when I saw that comment. It deserves two awards! / CP: This is exchange is so perfect I want to frame it.

And the Never Trust a -Lene Award to Frankie:

Plus, I dont know how this is going to work considering they long ago stripped Alison of everything that made her interesting and married her off so she could stay in Rosewood and raise the kids she was forcibly inseminated with. And isnโ€™t Mona supposed to be living in France keeping her mothers evil twin and her mothers evil twins daughter who was also the evil twin of her best friend/cousin in a makeshiftbasement dollhouse for all eternity? My god that show was shit. I really do hate you, Marlene. Your definitely the new Ilene. Never again will I trust a -lene. / Heather Hogan: "Never again will I trust a -lene" is the funniest thing I have read in awhile.

And onย โ€œBattle of the Sexesโ€ Is a Triumph for Sports Movies and Lesbians:

The Harold And The Purple Racquet Award to Meg:

โ€œBillie Jean King is a hero!โ€ an older man in front of me whispered loudly to his wife. She patted his hand. She said, โ€œI know.โ€ In my headcanon, this man is Harold, of the โ€œHarold, theyโ€™re lesbiansโ€ fame.


See a funny or amazing comment that needs to be here? E-mail me at queergirlblogs [at] gmail [dot] com!


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Darcy

Darcy, a.k.a. Queer Girl, is your number one fan. She's a fat feminist from California who doodles hearts in the corners of her Gay Agenda. They're living through a pandemic, they're on Twitter, and they think you should drink more water! She also wants to make you laugh.

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44 Comments

  1. Can I just take a moment to indulge in a food-related vent? Yes? Ok good.

    Attn. cafรฉ/restaurant owners! The following items do NOT count as appropriate vegetarian substitutes, to be charged at the same price as your meat offerings:

    -a meat sandwich minus the meat
    -an extra slice of tomato (same goes for lettuce, peppers, spinach etc.)
    -a microscopically thin smear of avocado or hummus
    -a larger than average sprig of parsley
    -a pile of carrot shavings
    -“garden vegetable soup” that is actually watered-down spaghetti sauce from a tin

    Thank you and please feel free to post your own food rants below.

    • Once I went to a restaurant with a group and, scanning the menu for vegetarian offerings, found basically nothing. Rather disappointed, I ordered a ‘garden salad’. There was no description, but everyone knows what a garden salad is? It’s a cheap and sad salad full of generic vegetables with no variability throughout the seasons?

      There were little bits of freshly cooked bacon all over the salad. The only thing that made it even a little bit better was everyone else hated their food too. Anyway, that was how I learned that you have to ask if the ‘garden salad’ is vegetarian.

    • How can anyone spread hummus thinly? IT WAS MADE TO BE SLATHERED YOU HEARTLESS FIENDS.

      I can’t post my food rants there’s not enough patience in the world for that and my way are very strange if not horrifying to most people.

      For example I find baked fruit to be an abomination and most dairy products to be gross.
      Also I’m gifted at making baked fruit things which often adds a layer of outrage.
      And irritatingly inconsistent that I like cheese in pizza etc and tres leche cake, but can only stomach eating feta in ‘mass amounts’ or uncooked and wanna hurl when I see people spread butter on things, but I make kickass lemon curd.

      See how quickly things could devolve into ranting about my food weirdness?
      You don’t want me rant about food, that way leads to chaos.

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