OPEN THREAD: OPEN

Hi. How are you? Have you had a weird or hard day? Do you have a bad case of the Tuesdays? Do you have a case of the stomach flu? Are you sick of selling shoes or teaching children to read all day? Did your girlfriend spill her soy milk all over the kitten/kitchen? Do you feel like THIS:

Or this?

Well, whatever it is, we want you to just let it out! Just LET IT OUT! Just tell us.

The comments are here for you and you’re allowed to yell about anything! Anything at all in the whole wide world except this website — or even this post! Yup. Those’ll be deleted. We want to hear what’s bothering you, whether it be the patriarchy, or the fact that you’re out of toilet paper, or that you didn’t get in to Bryn Mawr or you can’t get pregnant like Cori! Try to use as many exclamation points as possible. Remember not to confuse sadness and anger, okay? Just get it out! GET IT OUT! No honestly, we care. It’s been a weird week.

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712 Comments

  1. – I don’t have a job right now. Shit.
    – I really hate where I live but I’m stuck here for at least two more years.
    – Straight girls. I’m so tired of being manipulated by them.
    – I tried to hug the cat but he bit me and ran away. Lol :(

  2. It took me 3years of getting away to finally get over her, we now share the same office and its the last thing I expected to happen!
    I NEED A CIGARETTE SO BAD! no one knows i smoke and I dont want to quit!
    My ciggy is the best girlfriend i ever had. And so is Autostraddle. Smoking while reading AS is the best relationship ever!
    The best job in town is the one im in and its SHIT, Im thinking of retiring…
    Im starting to fall for a straight girl and it would be the worst thing I will ever do.. so I pretend she has a boyfriend that would punch me in the face if I made a move :p .. its working out so far..

    Thanks AS! CHEERS

  3. OH INTERNET. TAKE MY WOES AND TURN THEM INTO WITTICISMS.

    I am afraid of lesbians. THERE. I SAID IT. I am a bisexual lady and I am afraid of lesbians. Not in a homophobic way but in an I can’t say words sort of way. I walked into the queer room at university, and stuttered like a nervous child with a mouth full of marbles.

    I WOULD LIKE TO MAKE OUT WITH LADIES. THIS IS COUNTERPRODUCTIVE.

  4. I just finished cleaning ALL the things, and went to faff about on LJ. WHICH ISN’T WORKING.

    I have a mystery!shoulder which is painful and broken and wrong, but no one knows why or how or what to do about it. And painkillers send me high as a fucking kite, so I can’t take them. Well, I can, but you know, I HAVE THINGS TO DO. THINGS WHICH WOULD BE BETTER DONE IF I HAD TWO WORKING SHOULDERS.

  5. I HAVE READ ALL OF THIS THREAD AND IT REMINDED ME I HAVE NO LIFE RIGHT NOW. Everyone is being productive and shit, my life is basically made of drunkenness, hangovers I take three days to recover from and loads of drunkenness.

    Also when I’m drunk I inexplicably go buy kebabs and it’s annoying because I’ve been trying to go veg forever. Also I *don’t like eggs*, can I just live off of veggies quinoa fruit and cheese? Or will that further ruin my body?

  6. I work at a summer camp and I am supposed to work until after school starts and my boss hasn’t responded to my requests to let my out of the last week of my job yet. I need like, 5 days before school to go sailing with my highschool boyfriend (we’re both gay now heh) and learn about his first real boyfriend, and go see by best friend in his musical tour in NYC and hug my parents and everything but my boss is INSANE and is forgetting me, since he is too busy… wait for it….

    TAKING THE GIRLS ON IMAGINARY MAGIC CARPET RIDES LEAD BY HIS DOGS AS THE SIT AROUND A FIRE, AND THEN THROWING SPRINKLES ON THEM AS HE DANCES AROUND IN A CIRCLE. (he is in his 70s… ugh.)

  7. Okay. I have an anxiety disorder. I’m usually okay at dealing with it. Until I get depressed. Then nothing gets dealt with, nothing gets resolved, nothing I need to make happen happens.

    I moved to a new city about a year ago. I did what I knew I should and found the local, affordable community mental health center and registered myself as a patient so I could get counseling and other help if needed it. Excellent.

    This morning, the first thing that happens when I wake up is panic. I can’t breathe, I can’t think, I can’t drive, and I certainly can’t pull myself to class without risking a complete meltdown. This did not shock me. I’ve been neglecting myself and all the things that keep me well, physically, emotionally, mentally, et cetera. I sleep sixteen hours when I have days off and hide from my roommate. I need help. I call aforementioned mental health center and oh, sorry, Big Local Hospital bought us and you have to have insurance to come here or pay $160 for an assessment and $120 per session, and if you want to see the psychiatrist, that’s another $140. Nearest place to get the help you obviously need, crying crazy person, is an hour away. They can help you in 4-6 weeks. Good luck!

    Wtf. I made my appointment, they’ll see me at the end of August. But REALLY? I guess I’ll just go to yoga classes and be more adamant about journaling between now and then.

    Also, my girlfriend really cares, I know she does. But I don’t think she knows how to care without making me feel like a useless, inconvenient burden. She deals with things that worry her that she can’t control by sighing and getting huffy and yelling. Not helpful, but I don’t blame her. When you date someone with a mental illness, you date a mental illness.

    • I’ve been experiencing that too, and it just SUCKS.

      It’s like, I AM JUST WAKING UP. I JUST WANT TO EAT MY GRAPEFRUIT FOR BREAKFAST AND NOT FREAK OUT.

      All I can say is:

      Good for you for calling. (That is so hard.)
      Go outside.

      Seriously. For me, depression&anxiety get 100 million times worse when I stay inside and don’t go anywhere. Go outside in the sunshine and lie on the grass.

      Hugs.

    • I had several months of weekly panic attacks last fall, and I just wanted to say that I’m sorry that you’re dealing with them – anxiety disorders are awful things. Also, you’re not alone!

      I was just thinking… If you’re taking any anti-depressants, some of them can cause a rise in anxiety. Once I lowered my anti-depressant dosage, the panic attacks stopped, so if that’s the case for you, it might be something to look into.

      If not, I found that exercising helped a lot, and so did making sure that I slept enough. Also, also, also, the lack of free mental health care SUCKS! That’s not right that they won’t see you for so long and want to charge you so much! Broke people need health care too.

      I’ll be sending good vibes your way!

  8. I’m getting married (TO A LADY FTW!), and we’re having issues finding a good wedding planner. We’re looking at getting hitched in the Canadian Rockies. Any Canucks ’round these parts that might have suggestions? We’ve contacted a few people/places/companies, but so far we’re not happy with things.

  9. Oh and my boss is ANTAGONIZING ME!!!! I WANT TO QUIT MY JOB, but I have to wait for one month. I DON’T KNOW HOW I WILL SURVIVE except maybe if make out with my crush!!

  10. So I’m about to go to the gym. I’m on the five week couch-to-5k plan and that’s going well. I’ve been lifting weights since January (my New Years resolution/goal is to be able to do one tiny pull-up by January 2012). I’m getting so bored with my routine. Should I start taking rock climbing lessons or boxing?

  11. My puppy has chewed up four pairs of headphones because im stuck in the habit of setting my stuff down on the table when I come in the house. I don’t know whether to be mad at him or mad at myself but im mad.

    • i bought this to stop our puppy from chewing on the couch, hand towels, socks, etc. it really works wonders, i only used it the first year and he hasn’t chewed anything other than his harness (which i haven’t sprayed)

  12. That my parents (who I am currently -reluctantly- living with) don’t give a fuck that their cats keep pissing and shitting all over the bathroom floor because they don’t have to use that bathroom to be barefoot in or brush their teeth or shower. There’s seriously shit and piss smeared everywhere and they don’t care. It’s disgusting. I keep cleaning it up, even though they’re not my cats or my responsibility, and they keep pissing and shitting.

  13. Could we have a positive things open thread as well at some point?

    (Yeah, I know, I’m just dying to share that I’ll be looking at this really cute cat today, who will probably come and live with me. Sue me.)

  14. I feel alone…
    I have friends but only 2 close ‘best’ friends and both are straight. I don’t feel like I fit in with any group of friends, I don’t really feel like I belong any where. I don’t know anyone gay, lesbian, queer etc. and I don’t feel like I can’t talk to anyone at home either. It would be nice to talk to someone about how I’m feeling and stuff but I never feel like I can trust people enough not to go blabbing to others.

    I can’t wait go get to college in september because then maybe I’ll become friends with or maybe more with people that I can trust. Hopefully I will make a close groups of friends that I feel like I fit in with.

    Ohh! The teenage angst is killing me.

  15. I don’t even know where to begin.

    I want to list all the bullshit things going on in my life right now, but when I start to I just feel guilty. It doesn’t really matter that I am 27, single, unemployed and living at my parent’s house while going to community college. As much as I want someone to laugh with and make out with, I am fine…everything is fine. As much as I want a bigger group of friends, including more queer folk, I am good with my best friends who I have known 10+ years. It doesn’t matter that my ex didn’t call or text on my birthday because I went to NY and walked on the Brooklyn bridge! All the stress from school is unimportant because getting straight A’s makes it all better.

    As much as I want to bitch about things this has given me an opportunity to be thankful for what is going right in my life.

  16. God I wrote so much originally I just copied it and posted it on my tumblr. Like it was ridiculously long. Cliff notes—Depression/anxiety. Depression is not major depressive episode at this time and anxiety is getting easier to deal with. Depression starts to get worse. Enter Girl last Saturday. Next comes confusion. Then sadness and anger (directed at myself). Today is Thursday and I still haven’t called.

    I get so pissed at myself for not being able to let go when it seems like it should be easy but ends up being impossible because losing control freaks me the hell out. Since I’m in Florida right now I’m just going to keep myself distracted and busy. Also I really, really just want to make out right now.

  17. My mother saw a picture of a half-naked girl I had saved to my computer. Looked at it for several seconds. It’s probably burned into her retinas.
    Fuck.
    I mean, she knows I’m bi, but knowing it and seeing it are two different things.

    I am such a twat.

    Also, I just finished Feed, by M.T. Anderson, and it pissed me off. I really hate books that have no ending. One second it’s a story, and the next second, Comprehensive Reading Questions. Why do you do this to me, books?

  18. I feel like I’ve teenage angst until I’m in my 40s…
    And if there are so many cute girls out there not getting laid, could we all just get together sometime and see if we mesh well with one another? XD

    Cute girl at work that I just might be in love with messed around for a very, very long time…stayed over at her house, though we refrained from anything below the belt b/c her boyfriend (!) would have killed me. and he is more than twice my size. She won’t leave him…she’s a “recovering homosexual/trying to be a good Christian” thing (though I’m pretty sure that I’m still a “good” Christian even though I’m gay…except for the whole messing around with someone in a relationship part) But yeah…leaving in three weeks for college. Why is it that I feel like I’ll miss her more than my friends I’ve known for years?

  19. My phone getting nicked by some asshat in a bar and hogging all my credit!!!!! Gah!!!!!!
    Now, it’s just another additional expense for a poor uni student…. And to top it all off, the girl from the bar I drunkenly made out with likes me, even giving me her number despite the fact that I can’t reply to her messages anyway so I am attempting to nip this in the bud without hurting her feelings. And I’m possibly going to fail miserably and end up with a good ‘ol slap in the face. So cheers Autostraddle for letting me rant about my rather weird and not-so-wonderful week. End Rant.

  20. Soooo… (probably this will be long, thanks if you wanna bare with me)

    I’m 25… Working on my 3 businesses.
    Most of my partners in the businesses are dudes.
    Yes, I work well with the males, and my field of work fill with guys. My appearance is not too femme, but definetly not butch.

    When I was in the states,
    it’s so easy to be me. Because circle of friends are more liberal and I believe won’t judge me eventho I confess to them that I like girls. (I only came out to some gay guy bestfriends)

    But back to my country (it almost been a month back to my country), it’s pretty much more conservative… (yes, more conservative than Midwest! lol)

    And I live with my family here…
    And it’s not fun bcause I must repressed who I am.
    Looks like everyone’s straight here! (grrrr…)
    I need to hold my tongue when I see pretty lady. (With my gay BF, it’s so easy to comment when I see cute girls *lol)

    And because this is Asian country,
    most people loves to ask about marriage and having children.
    Specially because I’m female, most girls in my age already have husband or start a family. I do really feel annoyed when people ask that question.

    How bout me?
    I don’t consider myself to have husband in the future.
    I just wish one day I’ll live with my girlfriend (if one day I can meet ‘this awesome girl’!). Work my ass hard outside home, and back to my partner after work is a really great feeling, I guess.

    The problem is,
    I am more into western girls. Hard to find a local girl that I’m attracted with, eventho girls here are more touchy and friendly.

    I definetly plan to go out of country again. Live in more liberal country. (Which means, work harder and saving)
    I just don’t want that one day end up here in my country and fulfill what the society wants, a lady to married with her ‘prince’ – which I know that’s not what I want.

    All works, good friends, and nice family (that I’m hiding about my sexuality)… are in my country. And I love my country, I work my ass off here also because I love my country. I’ve been in ‘two worlds’: the developing country and developed country. I don’t want to work in the developed just because life’s better there when people in my country needs ‘the brains’ to go back to our homeland. (Yes, it’s possible for me to find job overseas)

    It just one problem, I don’t think people here will accept me if I have a girlfriend – not a boyfriend. :(
    And it’s hard to find a girlfriend here…! (lol)

    It just, feels like I’m confronted with 2 options in my life: to serve… or to find the love of my life?
    (hmm, never know that I’ll write that sentence :D)

    Fiuhhh,
    now I’m just let it all out…

    Well anyway, I will be very happy if anyone has point of views about my situation…? :D

  21. im soooo fucking fed up with corporate america why is everything a fucking business why does seeing a neurologist for something that might not even be/i can’t fucking fix cost sooo much why do i have to pay money i don’t have/ won’t have until maybe 10 years from now for a fucking education…why why why
    it’s like almost everything is a fucking catch 22 gaaaaahhhhhhhhhhhh!!!!!! i hate misplaced business and ethics!!!!!!!!

    (sorry needed to vent)

  22. Dear Bane of My Existance,

    You have paper.

    You HAVE ink.

    So why won’t you just print my document. That’s all I ask. Just PRINT my FUCKING DOCUMENT????

    StOp bLiNkInG.

    STOP BLINKING!!!!!!

    love, Katelyn.

  23. AAARGH!

    ENORMOUS blog post about Unicorn Plan-It just about to go live WHEN MY LAPTOP WENT MENTAL AND BACKSPACED SO MUCH THAT ALL THE CONTENT WAS LOST…THEN BLOGGER AUTOSAVED!

    NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!

  24. I woke up this morning at 5 and i thought i was going to die. I think im transgendered. I dont like school. I dont like being denied power because i have a vagina. I hope that my badass skills on cod black ops makes up for the racist homophobic and misogynistic slurs. I hate duke em nuke em. I dont like being sober. I need sex.i think id like to become a porn star. Id like to run away. Id like to sleep. My family brings me down. She said in two weeks she would contact me, and, its already been 4.i fuck up. I m almost gonna be 20 and im usually the one dumped. Its hard finding a girlfriend let alone someone who is vegan and sober. What happened to the revolution? Theres this one girl she’s really cute. The two times she’s checked me out i get real nervous, shes a cashier at a local grocery store.

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