The Comment Awards Know The Straights Could Never

Friends of mine! Are you well? Are you thriving? Are you hanging on? Are you singing to your dogs and cats and hedgehogs? Are you writing down riddles to put in the windows for your neighbors? Are you talking out loud to the cardboard cutout of Sara Ramirez you brought to camp in 2018? No, me neither. I’m not doing any of those things either. Listen: we’re doing GREAT. And I love you!

This week, our pals in the Greasebats universe tried a digital hang-out.

Children’s author Jacqueline Wilson came out at age 74! Everyone is gay!

For this week’s Gey In Kikh, Ari made matzo for Passover.

Siobhan did a deep dive on the Public Universal Friend, my favorite 18th century non-binary Quaker!

The Queer IRL Gallery is back! Show us your faces and your spaces!

You Need Help had quite a week, with Malic weighing in on pandemic break-ups, and Drew tackling…pandemic-fueled reunions with your ex!

Riese wrote about the intricacies of keeping Autostraddle alive during a pandemic, and how you can help.

This is v. good and v. gay: 11 Poems to Read to Your Lesbian Lover in Isolation.

And then there were your comments!

On Jacqueline Wilson is Gay: Beloved Author and Former Children’s Laureate Comes Out at 74:

The Straights Could Never Award to snowvasphalt and Hester:

Ummmmm this made my DAY. Jacqueline Wilson and Ann M. Martin, omg, the straights could NEVER.

On “To L and Back” L Word Podcast Episode 402: Livin’ La Vida Loca with El Sanchez!!

The Miracle of Life Award to BettyOnIt:

Thanks for another great episode, I literally did not remember any of this hour of TV, so I finally get that thing people say how not remembering the pain of giving birth helps you give birth again, only it’s me watching another episode of The L Word in my quarantine rewatch.

On Gey In Kikh: Passover Matzo, the Bread of Affliction:

The Matzoh Kitty Award to Nora:

Thank you! I tried out this out, I had to add some extra water and it took me a couple of tries to get them thin enough. I will definitely try again later this week. My cat actually ate a substantial piece of one of the “failed

On 11 Poems to Read to Your Lesbian Lover in Isolation:

The Love Language Award to Wren:

I can’t wait to savor these with my partner <3 Also props to you for including your own poem! I'm all about queers and women being proud of their own work and accomplishments and sharing them with the world.

On The Public Universal Friend: A Deep Dive on a Story of Nonbinary Identity, Quakerism and Near-Death Experiences:

The Hero We Deserve Award to Liz Jay:

As a gender-questioning spiritual/religious person, this is an incredibly rad deep dive and delights me so much. Also, “a series of events that involved The Friend escaping arrest through a display of skilled horsemanship, the women who lived with the friend violently driving out the men sent to arrest them in their home, and a posse of thirty people eventually breaking their door down in the middle of the night

On No Filter: Sarah Paulson and Holland Taylor Got a Dog, Everyone Gets a Dog, You Get a Dog!

The Whole Kit and Ka(p)oodle Award to Stef and msanon:


And on This Business of Art:

The Queerconomics Award to Caitlin:

We are keeping your money extremely gay. If straight people donate, their money immediately becomes gay. That’s the law!

See a comment that needs to be here? Tag me! I’m [at] queergirl.

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Darcy, a.k.a. Queer Girl, is your number one fan. They're a fat feminist from California who doodles hearts in the corners of their Gay Agenda. They're living through a pandemic, they're on Twitter, and they think you should drink more water! They also wanna make you laugh.

Darcy has written 376 articles for us.


    • I think it’s caused me to use less punctuation 🤔

      Oh and than you for the award last week.

      Really missing FOTs

      • hi lex! how are you doing? if this were a FOT i would ask you…hmm…what’s the oddest inanimate object you’ve ever spoken aloud to?

        • I have called for my remote control before…
          like “ where did you go, remote? Come back to me!”

        • Doing ok, haven’t needed to take corticosteroids and been experimenting with grinding spices using a coffee grinder.

          I struggle to think of inanimate object I haven’t spoken to…doorways and wall corners seem like normal ones.
          Maybe a B-17? Or perhaps a tank. I did coo at a tank once. It was cute lil tank, a brave little toaster.

        • i regularly thank timers, like on the stove, microwave, etc… they often go off earlier than i am ready for, but thanking them feels better that getting irritated since i asked to be reminded in the first place.

          still that dog, though. when i get bummed i am going to think about Winnie having a play date with Mo Moennig.

        • When I drop something and am in a bad mood I say “fine, stay there on the floor then” and refuse to pick it up as if it is a misbehaving toddler

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