NSFW Sunday is Smart and Sexy, In That Order

Welcome to NSFW Lesbosexy Sunday!

via pinktacolovers.tumblr.com

+ The oldest cave art ever shows a vagina. The drawing, which is in the south of France, is 37,000 years old, which is a big deal. The fact it might be of something sex-related is a bigger one:

“Researchers like Javier Angulo and Marcos García […] believe that artistic representations of genitalia from the Paleolithic may shed light on something called sexual hominization, i.e. the process by which things like eroticism and sexuality emerged in an anthropological context.

According to Angulo and García, the lack of paleolithic art depicting the human form is one of the greatest challenges facing our understanding of prehistoric sexuality. The discovery of an artistic representation of a vulva, therefore (especially one dating as far back as 37,000 years ago) adds another piece to a small but growing puzzle that hints at the origins of our relationship to sex as something that transcends biological necessity, and enters a realm of what García describes as ‘pleasure, play’ and ‘eroticism.'”

via lesfemmes.tumblr.com

+ People speak the same way when they’re into each other. According to a recent study involving linguistics and words:

“Pennabaker found […] that when the language style of two people matched, when they used pronouns, prepositions, articles and so forth in similar ways at similar rates, they were much more likely to end up on a date.

‘The more similar [they were] across all of these function words, the higher the probability that [they] would go on a date in a speed dating context,’ Pennebaker says. ‘And this is even cooler: We can even look at … a young dating couple… [and] the more similar [they] are … using this language style matching metric, the more likely [they] will still be dating three months from now.’

This is not because similar people are attracted to each other, Pennebaker says; people can be very different. It’s that when we are around people that we have a genuine interest in, our language subtly shifts.”

 

via ancestryinprogress.tumblr.com

+ Earlier this week, the Rumpus interviewed Dita Von Tesse about her work, adult entertainment, and classiness and sexiness:

“If you really get to the essence of what makes one sexy, if you get past just what you see in magazines and such, you can see that true sexiness has many facets. The elements include things like confidence, strength, intelligence, and humor. The great seductresses in history knew that it isn’t just about trying to look sexy or pretty; it’s an art and one becomes skillful in it when she realizes that there are all these conflicting elements that all come together to make something magical. So, what I’m saying is that you don’t need to choose, you just need to understand that all these different things come together to create sexy, and your mind and your personality are a massive part of that.”

Dita Von Tesse by Sheryl Neilds from the Rumpus

+ Everyone keeps talking about the history of the vibrator (probably because of Hysteria). But the Atlantic is talking about the future, and how normalizing sex toys could lead to better sex for everyone:

“Jimmyjane’s conceit is to presuppose a world in which there is no hesitation around sex toys. Placing its products on familiar cultural ground has a normalizing effect, Imboden believes, and comparing a vibrator to a lifestyle accessory someone might pack into their carry-on luggage next to an iPad shifts people’s perceptions about where these objects fit into their lives. Jimmyjane products have been sold in places like C.O. Bigelow, the New York apothecary, Sephora, W Hotels, and even Drugstore.com. Insinuating beautifully designed and thoughtfully engineered sex toys into the mainstream consumer landscape could push Americans into more comfortable territory around sex in general. Jimmyjane hopes to achieve this without treading too firmly on mainstream sensibilities. ‘Not everyone sits in a conference room and talks about vibrators, dildos, anal sex, clitorises — and we do,’ Imboden explained. ‘It’s important for us to remain a part of the mainstream culture and sensitive to how normal people discuss or don’t discuss these subjects.'”

+ At Racialicious, Aja Worthy-Davis writes about “Dating a Trans Man: Negotiating Queerness and Privilege“:

“I’m a queer Black femme prone to dating middle-aged divorced hippie White guys due in equal parts to my upbringing, my personality, and my personal baggage. He’s a Black man who has dated more than his share of middle-aged divorced hippie White lesbians. And (I guess this is the kicker) when we met in our staunchly Catholic high school over a decade ago, he was a girl. He was also my laid-back butch best friend I couldn’t stop thinking about when I kissed my boyfriend. We skipped after-school activities and hung out in the Village holding hands. We giddily queered-up our Drama Club performances to culturally-sheltered teenagers who wouldn’t recognize queer if the Gay Pride Parade marched in front of them. We identified with Willow and Tara, which I think says it all. Watching Pariah was like watching our relationship played back at us, only we were Annie On My Mind chaste.”

On “the perks of having herpes”:

“The Conversation continued to ruin my life after dark; disclosure brought the othering I had dreaded. But wait a minute! I thought. I’m still desirable. Men still eagerly come to my bed. Down there, I looked and felt the same as I always had.

Even if my male peers had been forged by the same awful sex-ed that I had, surely I meant enough to them to at least do some research before rejecting me, right?

That’s when I realized I was picking the wrong men.

Before herpes, I didn’t think about my body much. But the virus had jolted me into self-awareness. I ate better. I exercised more. I felt more fragile and powerful and worthy of careful handling than ever. Herpes, oddly, did not turn me into damaged goods. Instead, it became a filter for expendable men in my life.”

photo by Zanele Muholi

+ Amanda Hess on how to ditch happily ever after and build your own romantic narrative (pronouns may not always apply):

“I’m 26 now—the age the average American woman marries for the first time. And though society’s stock romantic narratives and rigid gender roles may seem like childish stories you grow out of with age and experience, I’ve noticed that the older I get, the more they attempt to exert their influence over my life. My peers and I—out of the dorm room but not yet into a mortgage—have found ourselves squirming under the slow suck of societal pressure, which encourages us all to settle down and get married already, or else acquire our dozen cats and our witching license and shut ourselves in forever.”

 

via curvygirlsarebetter.tumblr.com

+ At the Hairpin, a Non-Monogamous Couple answers questions about finding couples to play with, talking about opening up a relationship, and non-monogamy and jealousy and cheating.

via elles.tumblr.com

Disclaimer: All of the photographs on NSFW Sundays are taken from various tumblrs and do not belong to us. All are linked and credited to the best of our abilities in hopes of attracting more traffic to the tumblrs and photographers who have blessed us with this imagery. The inclusion of a photograph here should not be interpreted as an assertion of the model’s gender identity or sexual orientation. If there is a photo included here that belongs to you and you want it removed, please email our tech director at cee [at] autostraddle dot com and it will be removed promptly, no questions asked.


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10 Comments

  1. ” Author T Cooper told Out magazine that as a transman, husband, and father he was “exercising the shit out of [his] heterosexual privilege.” And why shouldn’t he?! Even I have to admit there’s a certain degree of satisfaction I feel knowing two queer folks can benefit from heterosexual privilege. After all, the best revolutions start inside the machine.”

    I know she contradicts herself, but there is something inherently wrong with this sentiment.

  2. I really like the Dita Von Teese interview… her responses more than the questions actually. Seems like the interviewer was trying to pigeonhole some forms of erotic performance and Dita just wasn’t having it.

  3. “the slow suck of societal pressure, which encourages us all to settle down and get married already, or else acquire our dozen cats and our witching license and shut ourselves in forever.”

    I actually applied for my witching license just last week. FYI.

  4. I have to say… nicely done. I love the NSFW Sundays (which i read on mondays, which are my sundays, so as to keep in the spirit of the thing) but this one is particularly well done. Am full of ALL the emotions now – thank you for your work on this post!!!!

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