No Filter: Kristen Stewart’s New Girl Friend Is Whispering Secrets Into Her Mouth

Welcome back to No Filter, a column with its finger on the pulse and its tongue in its cheek and probably a lot of other places. This week, a lot’s going on — everybody’s dating or presumably not dating everybody else and I’m all up in their business like a nosy Jewish grandmother. We at Vapid Fluff HQ work tirelessly to provide you with the queerest in supermarket tabloid journalism, mostly via Instagram.

This week in celebrities having relationships a lot more fulfilling than mine, here’s Sarah Paulson admiring Holland Taylor admiring a painting:



Hey, do you guys know about Soko? Her record “My Dreams Dictate My Reality” was one of my favorites of the past year. Anyway, she was recently spotted being really adorable with Kristen Stewart in Paris, and you know what that means — these two are FRIENDS. VERY GOOD FRIENDS. Look at Soko whispering all her secrets into Kristen’s mouth! Look at these goddamn flowers she greeted Kristen with at the airport! If Kristen threw a party and invited everyone she knew, the biggest gift would for sure be from Soko.


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Saturday: A tableau

A post shared by Lauren Morelli (@lomorelli) on

The most impressive thing about Lauren and Samira’s picnic is that it appears that Duncan the dachshund has solved a Rubik’s cube all by himself. He can’t even see colors! Way to go, little dude.


Here’s one of the few pictures on Queen Latifah’s instagram that isn’t a promo shot for her new movie. I guess this is too. Whatever, the point is: we’re covering Queen Latifah now. She isn’t dating Paula Patton.


https://www.instagram.com/p/BCe14FYrJSF/
Leisha Hailey is taking hip-hop dance classes now? Leisha Hailey is taking hip-hop dance classes now.


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#currentpointofview

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Laura Jane Grace’s guitar stares out the window pensively.


https://www.instagram.com/p/BCyQ4XrJqMN/

Damn, Danielle – back at it again with the white vaaaans.


Ingrid Nilsen caught you this fish with her bare hands.


https://www.instagram.com/p/BCvk_urwqXh/
Kreayshawn is an actual cartoon. You oughta see her paintings of tunnels.


Join us next week, when hopefully we’ll know a lot more about the nature of this blossoming friendship between Kristen Stewart and Soko.


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Stef Schwartz is a founding member and the self-appointed Vapid Fluff Editor at Autostraddle.com. She currently resides in New York City, where she spends her days writing songs nobody will ever hear and her nights telling much more successful musicians what to do. Follow her on twitter and/or instagram.

Stef has written 460 articles for us.

33 Comments

  1. WOW that saturday afternoon sounds like a dream, forever jealous of Lauren and Samira (I can’t decide which one I want to be / be with in this hypothetical, is this the gayest conundrum?)

  2. For the last two days, I have been eagerly anticipating Autostraddle’s coverage of StewKo and the end of the gay pal era in tabloid world. And, as usual, Stef delivered big time. “Kristen Stewart’s New Girl Friend Is Whispering Secrets Into Her Mouth” is pure gold. God, how my queer celebrity gossip-loving heart loves No Filter.

  3. So happy Kristen is dating another lady so we don’t have to see the “IT WAS A PHASE!” nonsense from the media. At least not yet. It wouldn’t surprise me if they did it even if she didn’t date another man until she was like 75.

    • Honestly, it wouldn’t surprise me if they go on pretending she is nothing more than friends with this woman just like they did with her last girlfriend. Just like they sometimes still do with Cara D and St. Vincent. I love the fact that they are full on kissing on the mouth. There is no way you can spin that as just “gal pals hanging out in Paris” but they’ll try.

  4. Liz

    I wonder if brenda is going to come back and declare that Kristen and Soko are just gals being pals.

  5. Stef I’m really happy for you that you go to to use your Damn Danielle joke. xx

    • seriously it’s all i wanted this week – the banana peels and kristen stewart photos were a bonus.

  6. OMG OMG OMG I heart Soko so much! Kristen and Soko together make my head explode with world colliding joy.

  7. So does this mean Alicia Cargile is available? She’s so gal pal worthy. … love Kristen wherever and whoever she goes to. Alicia CALL ME!

  8. Kristen Stewart and Soko are just gal pals. Who kiss on the mouth and bring each other flowers. Her true love was RPatz. Twilight forever ♥♥♥♥♥

    Hehe sorry I just wanted to see what it was like to be a straight 16 year old person for a second

    EZRA IS A GOOD GUY

  9. I saw a headline about KStew and Soko on my newsfeed, but it was a different site, so I didn’t open the link because I had to read it from you, Stef <3

  10. Cyd

    Holland and Sarah just slay me. Completely.

    Marry each other dammit!!

  11. Mey

    stef, you continue to be one of my favorite writers and one of my favorite people

  12. iva

    Duncan is such a clever little guy!
    I love this column.

  13. Is solving Rubik’s cubes a queer woman thing? My girlfriend, my friend, and apparently Samira Wiley can all solve them. I also don’t happen to know any people who can solve them that aren’t queer women… THE REAL GAY AGENDA: SOLVE ALL THE RUBIK’S CUBES.

  14. connie cappadonia

    Its.noones.business.leave.her.alone.I.support.her

  15. connie cappadonia

    I.support.kristen.no.matter.what.she.chooses

  16. I identify so I hard with Soko. Look at how smiley she is in the photos of her and kristen with flowers and kstew has moody brooding lesbian gf down to a tee. That is me; always an eager little pup buying flowers, putting my arm around her shoulder and posting on Instagram while the gal I’m dating isn’t even taking her damn earphone out. I love kstew but she parodies herself sometimes.

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