The L Word Generation Q Episode 201 Recap: Late To The Party Foul

Welcome to the first recap of the second season of The L Word: Generation Q, brought to you by the same network that brought you The L Word, a show about a sociopathic aspiring lesbian club mogul with a Lover named Cindy who moves to Los Angeles to destroy every lesbian eatery and bar that interferes with her dreams, orchestrates a backroom threesome with the town ladykiller on opening night, ruins a very fun party after said ladykiller has sex with aforementioned Lover (who is naked except for her kitten heels) on their white couch, hosts a scandalous oil wrestling event where young starlets rip each other’s hair out, unleashes a cage of wild rats in a local coffeehouse and then hosts a mafia-style showdown with her rivals in a scorching hot conference room during a city-wide power outage, after which time she is bested by a rich heiress who steals her club and her girlfriend, the afore-aforementioned Lover Cindy, who loves pastries and silk tank tops.

It’s finally time for this absolutely ridiculous adventure into Season Two of this show. Do you remember Season One? Back before so many of us had stared into the dark void of our own humanity for a series of terrifying months? Ah were we ever so young. We will never be young again! LOL!

Question for Everybody: When do you plan to watch the episodes? Friday mornings? Friday nights? Saturday? Sunday? Lemme know so I know the ideal time to drop this recap!

We open at the Tower Of Babel, which Sophie Suarez is ascending, wearing a sharp tailored suit and a tentative facial expression. As the music swells around us, I think to myself “hmmm, this definitely isn’t the Hollywood Burbank Airport aka the Bob Hope Airport, a public airport three miles northwest of downtown Burbank in Los Angeles County.” As you may recall, last we saw our young charges, Sophie was running through the airport in her Wildfang outfit, Dani was wearing Gucci high-tops and Finley was boarding an airplane while listening to my favorite podcast, To L and Back. But my friends, time has passed, as it so often does. And at the top of the stairs, Sophie finds her dearly betrothed Dani looking very hot.

Sophie and Dani looking at each other

Sorry the only spot I could find was a meter so we have like 45 minutes before I gotta bounce and also, I fucked Finley in the green room

It turns out that Sophie did visit the Aloha State with Dani, but they didn’t marry there. Instead, they intend to marry right here, in sunny Los Angeles California!!! Inside a very large building!!!!

Dani’s father is now 100% on board with the union, citing Sophie’s integrity and generosity. Furthermore, he has never seen his daughter as happy as she is right now in this moment, probably because he has never seen her look at art with Bette Porter.

Dani's Dad giving a toast at the rehearsal dinner

To the brides! (To the brides, to the brides, to the brides)
From your father (Rodolfo, Rodolfo, Rodolfo)
Who is sometimes by your side

We leap back in time an entire 15 hours to find Shane in a skinny tie (classic) and shoes I deeply covet (sure), walking her new dog friend, who I will call Sounder III, through an underground tunnel. Here, my friends, we stumble upon the Lost Butches of Los Angeles, hidden behind a vending machine that appears to be delivering candy bars and Cups-o-Noodles but is actually a door. And who is behind that door??!!

Lena Waithe as Eddie

You knew it was only a matter of time before I showed up here, yeah?

It’s Eddy (Lena Waithe), who has allegedly been eager to meet Shane, as allegedly they are the “white and Black versions of each other” because every masculine person of color in L.A. is just an [ethnicity] version of Shane. Turns out Tess is an employee of both Dana’s and Cup o Noodles Secret Texas Hold Em Club and she will be dealing this evening with no limits.

Eddy looking across the table

She’s just a skinny little white girl.

Tess at in a dress smiling

Told you so

A hot femme in a hot pink dress flirts with Shane while Eddy looks on. DANGER!!!!

We then travel over the 405 and into the woods over to the annals of education, where Alice and Nat are dropping off the kids and Alice is re-reading a draft of her upcoming memoir, in which there’ll be a chapter called “Boobs, Tubes and Pubes” that will not be about the Autostraddle column Boobs on Your Tube but in fact about Alice’s ovarian cysts. This is important for ovarian cyst visibility!

Alice reading an iPad

Wow, Zan is really coming into his own on these videos! He says YES now every time!

Stuck in line behind a hetero soccer Mom, Nat suggests a quick tryst in the backseat but Alice has only begun to scale the median when who should pop in but Gigi!!! Gigi is here to give Eli his class cupcakes, inform us that Nat’s always been into public sex, chew two pieces of Alice’s gum, and give me false hope that they might one day have another threesome.

Gigi in the backseat of Nat and Alice's car putting gum in her mouth

How would you say this compares to Wonka’s Magic Chewing Gum?

Alice suggests they find Gigi a girlfriend and Nat is like, “that is why I love you, you have all the best ideas.” Hopefully Alice is gonna just shake the lesbian phone tree and see if maybe Pink falls out and then wants to raise her glass with Bette.

We then shoot across town to Chez Bette, where our Lady of Porter is gamely pulling off some bold taupe leisurewear and speaking to a potential employer as Tina and Carrie show up and my friends the class war starts at home!!!!!

Bette on the phone

Good god you don’t ENTER with your entire hand in a balled-up fist, you have to start out more like this until you are all the way in

Yes the legendary Rosie O’Donnell is playing Carrie and I would take a bullet for her. A classic silver fox in a practical shirt about to die of shame over kinda nicking Bette’s mailbox? Who then offers to fix it up real fast no problem if Bette perhaps has some housepaint? Who had a Groupon for a Vietnamese bakery and got them all some giant meat buns? Who hasn’t heard of the internationally renowned art guy who wants to hire Bette? Welcome to Los Angeles, Carrie, we are so very happy to have you!

Carrie walking in Bette's house with a bag of groceries

I’m so sorry they were out of Junior Mints but I got Mint M’n’Ms, York Peppermint Patties, a handful of Andes Mints and also kidnapped Mr. Mint from Candyland and stuffed him in the bottom of the bag for good measure

Basically Carrie is the polar opposite of Bette. While Carrie’s clearly eager to impress her forerunner, Bette cannot tolerate the simple fact of Carrie’s existence, let alone anything she actually dares to say out loud. It’s a big shift for Tina, too.

Oddly enough, it was from Rosie that I first heard this idea that “in every couple, one person is the flower and the other is the gardener.” The gardener is steady, reliable, calm, controlled. She waters the plants and picks the right soil. The flower blooms. I don’t think that’s true about every couple, I think that’s actually a very specific kind of relationship — one that’s probably especially common amongst celebrities with non-famous partners. But it was absolutely true about Bette and Tina. And maybe now… Tina has a gardener of her own?

Angie bounds in to the kitchen to be a normal teenager not involved in this tense love triangle of intergenerational lesbian romance and to eat some breakfast. She says it’s cool that Tina and Carrie wanna get married this summer in Palm Springs, which is honestly a terrible idea because it will be at LEAST 120 degrees and everybody will melt and die faster than my dreams in March 2020.

Carrie and Tina in the kitchen

Whaddya say we rent a white van and go T.P. Elisabeth Hassleback’s mansion?

Angie in the kitchen

More pressing to Angie is that she’s got no idea who her donor is, unlike me and all other viewers of Season One of The L Word, who remember illustrious artist Marcus Allenwood. Unfortunately, her Moms squash that potential journey of discovery immediately, explaining she can’t meet her donor ’cause they’d agreed he would stay anonymous until she turned 18.

Carrie quite adorably begins rambling about how she did one of those genetics tests you can get in the mail and found out she was 100% IRISH and had family in West Palm Beach in the jet ski industry! Unfortunately, Mama B and Mama T don’t like the idea of Angie doing a genealogy test either.

Bette is… sad.

Back at DaSoMi’s chateau, Dani’s eyeing a table of tiny paper tents upon which the seating-related fate of their wedding guests is at stake.

Dani looking at table tents

The maverick should be able to trade lumber for agricultural credits. How have I not thought of this before?

Sophie implores her betrothed to stop obsessing over the seating at their wedding.

Dani: Do you think my Dad can just sit at a table in the corner by himself?
Sophie: Whatever Nuñez, it’s gonna be perfect because after we’re gonna go to your family’s house in Ojai and be naked all day.
Dani: Maybe we should just run away now.
Sophie: No no no no no. I wanna make these people cry. (Slaps her ass) So don’t fuck it up.

Sophie holding Dani while she points at the table

Actually… lemme tell you more about the trivia cards because you’re gonna need to know about the roadblocks first!

Dani texts Micah who’s allegedly at the gym but is NOT actually at the gym because he is putting his clothes back on after doing SEXUALS with JOSE who is MARRIED.

Jose and Micah talking

C’mon why are you leaving me to help out with somebody else’s doomed marriage when I have my own doomed marriage right here?

Exposition time!!!!!!!!!

  1. Jose can’t go to the wedding with Micah.
  2. Jose moved back in with his husband so they can break up their marriage?

It’s time to give this man the boot!

IT’S THE ALOCE SHOW!!!!!!!!!!!! Big news: Margaret Cho keeps calling, and thus I anticipate she will appear on a future episode. Alice explains to Sophie that she is SWAMPED these days with writing her book and doing the show and holding a water bottle and on top of all that, they want her to launch a new segment!

Alice and Sophie chatting on their walk off the set of the Aloce Show

And then I was like, “but Smartwater has SO many electrolytes, why would I switch to TAP?”

Alice: The network wants me to do a new segment on the show this season, like a carpool karaoke but with more gravitas? So like Carpool Karaoke meets—
Sophie: Intervention?
Alice: No, like Ellen’s Teacher Giveaways meets Oprah 2.0 meets the viral nature of carpool karaoke?
Sophie: So uplifting, but not silly, but interesting enough for people to watch and share?
Alice: Right. But through the Alice lens.
Sophie: Alright, I didn’t think I had to say QUEER.

Guess what: Alice needs to hire a producer for the segment and she’s got her eye on our very own Sophie Suarez, which’s great ’cause Sophie was craving a production job back in Season One, which aired 150 years ago. However Sophie’s reaction to this news does not seem to reflect expected enthusiasm levels, perhaps because her heart is heavy. Why is that? We will find out very soon!

Also, the assistant Alice hired to replace Finley is really bad at coffee.

Alice in The Planet with coffee

Alice feels lost without Finley! Finley made great coffee. Finley gave her encouraging finger-guns to pump Alice up and make her feel jazzed up with the eye of the tiger.

But, it turns out the reason Sophie and Dani’s intended marriage has proceeded at an alarming clip is not ’cause Sophie resolved her dilemma with either party. It’s because she has banished Finley from the Los Angeles metro area.

Alice: You don’t think Finley’s coming back? There’s not a chance or anything.
Sophie: NO. She’s not coming back. She’s staying in Kansas City forever.
Alice: Well, I’m gonna have to switch to tea if that’s the case.

Alice asks her inadequate assistant to get Sarah Finley on the horn.

Jordie and Angie are being REALLY FUCKING CUTE. Angie’s chomping on a sandwich, and Jordie’s hair is waving in the wind, and they are clearly deeply in love but also respect and value each other for who they are as people!?!?!

Angie and Jordi walking together

And then I was sitting in Kit’s office hanging out waiting for Mama T and Mama B to come get me and I found a gun and I was like hm, I wonder how this would feel in my tiny baby hands

ANYHOW Jordie suggests that Angie try the genetics test if meeting the donor is totally off the table. Angie fears Bette won’t go for that ’cause it was Carrie’s idea. In fact, just this morning, Angie noticed that Bette was horrified by Carrie’s inalienable right to exist. Jordi says Carrie is the best and Angie agrees. Gen Z rules!!!!!!!

Meanwhile, Mom’s at Dana’s with her best buds, Alice and Shane, acting like she was not aggressively meat-tagged at The Planet in 2007 and is at risk of Dying Alone.

Bette at restaurant

The giant Bette Porter murals were just so beautiful I simply saw no good reason to remove them from view

Bette: I think it’s because their togetherness just highlights the fact that I’m alone, and Tina has Carrie and she makes her laugh and she’s all JOKEY and I have… oh yeah that’s right! I have no one and I’m gonna die alone.
Shane: No no no no, you know why that’s not gonna happen? Because you always have Angie.
Bette: (scoffs)
Shane: What’s wrong with that?
Alice: Yeah, you two could be like, the Grey Gardens of this generation. But I mean in a much nicer house. Less racoons.
Shane: Cleaner, for sure.

This reminds me of when I was like, I’m going to die alone because nobody will ever love me, and Heather was like, that’s not true, Carol loves you so much!

Bette at lunch holding up her hand

How many fingers am I holding up?

Alice and Shane at lunch

I dunno, 8??!

Bette’s questioning the likelihood that she’ll ever meet someone who meets all of her criteria. Considering she’s one of the most beloved lesbians in the history of the sport, I’d say her chances of meeting someone criteria-approved is in the 100% range. This, by the way, is her criteria:

  1. Has kids of her own
  2. Isn’t married
  3. Isn’t straight
  4. Has a job
  5. No, not a job, a career
  6. And must be passionate about her work

Alice and Shane are skeptical that she truly wants a lady with a career instead of a wifey wife who will do the dry-cleaning and iron her yoga shirts and make balsamic reductions for her to eat when she comes home from her passionate job. Then Alice is like OMG, I know the perfect person to set you up with!

Shane: Don’t let her set you up, that’s how I ended up spending my 30th with eight hippies in a fucking yurt.
Alice: Okay, you loved it.

For anybody following along at home, this anecdote means that the unaired spin-off in which Alice went to jail for Jenny’s murder is officially not cannon, ’cause she would’ve been in jail for Shane’s 30th!

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Riese is the 41-year-old Co-Founder of as well as an award-winning writer, video-maker, LGBTQ+ Marketing consultant and aspiring cyber-performance artist who grew up in Michigan, lost her mind in New York and now lives in Los Angeles. Her work has appeared in nine books, magazines including Marie Claire and Curve, and all over the web including Nylon, Queerty, Nerve, Bitch, Emily Books and Jezebel. She had a very popular personal blog once upon a time, and then she recapped The L Word, and then she had the idea to make this place, and now here we all are! In 2016, she was nominated for a GLAAD Award for Outstanding Digital Journalism. She's Jewish and has a cute dog named Carol. Follow her on twitter and instagram.

Riese has written 3182 articles for us.


    • istg i knew full well that finley was gonna interrupt that wedding, true to the age-old soap opera trope, but i still freaked the fuck out. i also yelled about 5 times that if you are about to profess your love to a woman whilst she is at the altar you might want to take the fucking backwards snapback cap off your head, i would thoroughly enjoy if this is sophie’s first response next episode.

  1. loved the l&o reference because ilene chaiken is now doing l&o: organized crime, meaning she’s in charge of olivia benson whenever she crosses over to it. it all feels very full circle. also your recaps regularly make me laugh out loud and seeing as i don’t actually watch Gen Q and i’m only absorbing it through your recaps i’d like to thank you for doing them <3

  2. Riese i blushed and getting very naughty images in my head at your bette ” Fisting” Caption…😚😁- a classic. You are killing me.. The poppers caption also very funny but the first mentioned one.. Oh m….oh my .. OMG. I Shared it on FB as well as that article , great work as always. Im from germany so i cant view the show legally so we non US citizen will be dependent on your recaps….

  3. I already adore Carrie and I’m therefore dreading where the rest of this season is going to inevitably go.
    Loved the recap – your captured the Sophie / Dani relationship dynamic so well. I’m so glad we have another season just as I finished all of To L and Back, so I’m not yet done reading/hearing you talk about this show.

  4. No shade to any of the other Autostraddle recappers but I was really hoping you (Riese) would be the one recapping this season. Yes! Hilarious as always.

    So I’ve basically been celibate since COVID started (shh…I’m vaccinated but I have vulnerable people in my circle who I love deeply) and I did not realize just how deprived I was until I felt feelings long since felt when I saw Bette and Gigi kiss. Whew…yes ma’am!

    This season looks like it’s going to be good and extra messy and I’m here for it and all things Gigi (and Chloe too…I mean…you saw her right?)

    P.S. Is it my lack of physical intimacy or does everyone look really good this season?

    • Aw thank you! Don’t worry I know it’s my burden to write about this show for the rest of my life I will always be here doing it

      And yes everybody does look extra good this season for sure.

  5. I had kind of a shitty week, so I was absolutely thrilled when I realized that this episode was out today, and then doubly thrilled to see your recap was already up.
    Carrie is everything. I loved the cast’s chemistry. The ending was bonkers.
    Riece, I live for your recaps.

  6. only lightly exaggerating when i say that rosie o’donnell as carrie is the best thing this show’s ever done. rosa diaz “i’ve only had [carrie] for a week and a half etc etc” dot jpg and so forth

  7. Please, please, please, let there be a scene where Gigi has to drive Bette somewhere. With the wild driving scene we got in S1, I’m dying to see Bette’s reaction to Gigi’s driving emotions. Like is Bette a, better grab the oh, shit handles while we ride or die passenger, or will she use her gay superpowers to commandeer the car??

    So glad that Gigi broke up the public sex while in the car riders line at school. Apparently I’ve hit the age that that thought sounds horrifying. Is there an age where that wouldn’t be the worst idea? Like having sex in front of an elementary school with all the kids around sounds like a great way to get yourself on a perv list somewhere.

    Oh Finley, how I love thee, but oh how you have the worst timing ever. As soon as that wedding started, I had my blanket up to my eyeballs, ready to duck under like I was watching some horror movie play out. Public humiliation and second hand embarrassment will get me every time.

    As always your recap is much appreciated. Love the screen cap captions, callbacks to OG series, and everything in between.

    • yeah that idea made zero sense to me at all!! i was like… you are in a line of cars… so like, if the car does move, somebody behind you will want you to move and honestly how long could this line possibly take? 5 minutes? 10? There are things you can do without even jumping into the back… and also there are CHILDREN EVERYWHERE and i was very relieved that they were immediately interrupted on this venture

  8. “To the brides! (To the brides, to the brides, to the brides)” HONESTLY Riese thank you for this caption! I needed it today (because I need hamilton references every day)

    • “Who is SOMETIMES by your side” I’m living for this version (sorry I hadn’t clocked the entire caption when I started my comment but anyway I give 10/10 to this entire recap I haven’t finished yet). How lucky we are to be alive right now and be able to watch this season and read this recap #blessed after the year we had

  9. LOL at Finley’s speech at the end – the writers totally ripped off Grey’s Anatomy, when Jackson interrupted April and Matthew’s wedding and said much the same. “I love you blah blah and I think you love me too.” End on cliffhanger…all that’s missing is Arizona as the bridesmaid and Callie among the guests.

  10. As a Tibette shipper, I think I’m supposed to be resistant towards Carrie but I actually love her!! I love how unhappy she makes Bette. And I almost teared up when Tina said she was beautiful, too. I hope Bette and Tina will find their way to each other once again but until then I’m glad Tina has Carrie who makes her laugh and we have Carrie too. And Bette with Gigi, yes please and I want more!! I just have a problem with the way Gen Q writes Tina as having spent her life “in Bette’s orbit” and been entirely dependent on Bette before leaving to get some space, when I am pretty sure we saw Tina’s development into her own being in the original show (with her relationships, her career, her volunteering project to help the children, etc).

    Anyway, thank you, Riese! you’re doing the goddess’ work and we are grateful!

    • Actually this is a good point, you’re right! I think we have sort of attached ourselves to this narrative that Tina is in bette’s orbit being overshadowed by Bette, but like starting in Season 3, Tina very much has her own thing going on! And in Seasons 4-5 is producing an entire film! And a lot of this is happening when much less is happening for Bette.

  11. So phenomenal – def the most entertaining thing I’ve read in weeks with such excellent captions. Looking forward to the podcast continuing. And no pref on the time – tbh I read recaps before watching anyhow bc it makes the cringy moments palatable

  12. This entire recap is *gold*. It really made me laugh. Highlights include the opening paragraph, and the callback to baby Angie playing with Kit’s gun. Also, everything else. Brava.

  13. I screamed when Finley showed up!! I agree it definitely feels out of character. I guess the writers were going for maximum drama (when are they not).

    I’m shipping Shane and Tess harddd. I want it and I really hope they go in that direction.

    The best part about the show being back are these recaps! Excited for the rest of the season :)

  14. I’m so grateful to have one of the great L Word scholars recapping this season. This whole recap is so fun and hilarious, but those captions really had me cackling in a way that my neighbors couldn’t have appreciated.

    Can I just say as a longtime Bette Porter skeptic in this relatively safe space (that is home to many a Bette apologist, which I do intellectually and eyeball-istically understand but emotionally can’t vibe with) that it makes a lot of sense to me that Bette would not be a fun date. Snobbery aside, she wants the world to revolve around her, and she’s a bully when it doesn’t. Like she’s very very hot and I love that for her, but maybe she could be kind one day?

    Gigi, on the other hand, seems so goddamn charming and warm and perceptive that I cannot handle it even though I didn’t like the scallops line. Cannot believe Nat and Alice keep ragging on her as though her presence is not a gift.

    This episode felt jam-packed in the best way and I liked so much of it but most especially the teaser where Gigi knows Dani for whatever reason, and so the hope exists that Gigi will also flit around Dani with her hot, benevolent, sharp energy, probably lifting Dani from a fog of betrayal and heartache into…idk something sexier and less sad and more fun, and I will enjoy that.

    Also wardrobe is already crushing it pretty much across the, but Sophie in these suits is crushing crushing.

  15. Thanks for the AMAZING recap (as always!) 10/10 LOLs 😂

    As soon as we finished watching I rushed to check if it was posted yet, as they are often more entertaining than the actual episode!!

    I got serious Max flashbacks with Bette (and Gigi’s) treatment of Carrie… I am so glad other characters affirm her awesomeness(the kids are all right y’all!)

    I also got serious Papi crossed with Dawn Denbo vibes from Eddie, and I so wish they had used the amazing Lena Waithe’s talent on a more interesting character/arc.

    Excited for this hot mess of a season!! What a start!

  16. Glad to have the L Word back, and equally glad to have Riese’s recaps back!

    I just read this out loud to my girlfriend (who never made it to seasons 5 and 6 of the original), and had to explain several of the throwback references, not least of which being all those things with Dawn Denbo and her lover Cindy really did happen.

  17. The whole Bette/Tina/Carrie brunch scene (!!) had me screaming in delight and horror. The nicked mailbox, the repeated mention of the Groupon, the buns, “Do you have another knife? This one is kind of dull.” 😵Everyone besides Angie was annoying me in that scene and yet I loved every minute of it! Also loved the little side convo in the restaurant between Carrie and Tina (“I think you’re beautiful.” 🥲)

  18. This recap was gold. I literally screamed during that last scene. Finley showing up like that? It’s giving sociopath.
    Also, I really didn’t like that Eddie storyline. It made Eddie seem petty and immature and immediately painted her as the antagonist because of her treatment of Shane. The subtext was “Black lesbians don’t like white lesbians or how sexy they are.” Disappointing.

    • Yeah that was wild. I was like okay, I think this show tries really hard to be woke and with it and that can sometimes lead to being actually kinda racist when the people doing it don’t know what they’re doing. I was like what are we supposed to read from this? That black people will just take you for 10K when they’re mad at you for a mistake? Alright then.

    • Agreed. This whole bit recycled the Dawn Denbo plot except Eddie looked even worse because Shane didn’t know Chloe was married to her. It sets Shane up as an innocent white person who really didn’t know better.

      Also, are there no better, more substantial ways to engage with Shane/Alice/Tina/Weho’s whiteness than to have a Black character come critique them and then disappear?

    • Educate yourself on what a sociopath actually is. Throwing words like that around when a character does something you don’t agree with is very irresponsible. Just saying.

      I agree with the stuff about Eddie and that whole storyline though.

  19. I just want to let it be known that if you show up to my wedding on some bullshit like this(in front of whole family!!!) we are absolutely BOXING IT OUT. And no, it will not be a cute story we laugh about later.

    It makes it very hard to root for Sophie/Finlay given how this relationship is starting out. Then again, there are very few people on this show that I actually like or even enjoy watching. I had the same problem with the original L Word which was even worse.

    • It’s also worth noting that finding attractive bras in larger cup sizes that also provide the necessary back support/structure for larger breasts and are also cute is hard! And the ones that do are often more femme and ornate for Sophie’s style. They could have put her in a sports bra, but that doesn’t give the right silhouette in every outfit (like the one she was wearing on date night).

      The bra they put her in was plain and in a neutral color that matched her skin tone (not to be taken lightly because most nudes don’t match brown skin!). All in all, I could see why they made that choice/why a hypothetical Sophie would make that choice. And as someone with large breasts who has had to wear the ocasional “grandma bra” because there were no better options, I appreciated the representation. Just another point of view to consider.

      • yeah usually sophie doesn’t wear a bra so i was like, either this was a perplexing choice OR they were actually going for authenticity by picking one that did a certain job under her rehearsal dinner suit rather than one that was supposed to be sexy

      • You know what Carmen, you’re totally right! I had a breast reduction and had almost forgotten the various monstrosities I used to put on my boobs, which clashed soooo bad with my gender presentation and outfits.

  20. Rosie O’Donnell absolutely destroyed it as Carrie. Loved that whole dynamic with Bette so much! I didn’t think it made sense her at all with Tina but then they had that exchange at the table and it was so genuinely sweet.

    Riese if you are struggling to understand why Sophie couldn’t take the promotion, remember that she will need to quit her job entirely to prepare her body for pregnancy.

    Also forever and always here for the junior mint screencaps.

    Also, regarding when we watch episodes, I think the correct answer is “directly before reading the recap, thus I shan’t tarry watching the show because I want to read the recap.”

    • ah yes, the noted Tina Way to Get Pregnant.

      which i suppose could be an actual thing amongst people who can afford to do so?

      also same; i wasn’t sure about tina and carrie’s relationship until the dinner scene. honestly tina barely spoke this entire episode, as far as i can recall

      • Honestly there are so many doctors appointments involved in getting pregnant using any kind of fertility treatment (including when there are no fertility issues and you just need to use donor sperm) that it can be hard to hide it from a boss or coworkers, especially if they are the nosy type. My wife was working as a nanny while trying to get pregnant with our first child and she ended up having to take the baby she was nannying for with her to some of her appointments and just not tell the parents, because there was no other way to do them all at the times they needed to be done.

  21. When I first heard Rosie was cast as Tina’s GF, I was like really? Rosie? OK. I settled in to watch and the second, and I mean the absolute second I saw Rosie as Carrie, I said, “Oh I’m down with this, I’m so down.” I literally forgot how much I loved Rosie. Carrie is awesome and I dread what’s coming. This is The L Word (the Gen Q addition aside) and the parallels to the original…this will not end well and I fear it.

  22. The photo comment game was weak, but the review was fire.
    Happy that Finley was back – but poor Dani man.

    Also my favorite was Finley (I keep typing Finely) telling Tess they “might” need a right home.

  23. I’m planning to watch it Friday nights as I had no idea that it released in the mornings lol Saturday morning cartoon energy. also I’m choosing to believe that Finley had a hell of a time in Kansas City and spun out to the point that she thought showing up to Sophie’s wedding unannounced and uninvited fresh off the plane was a good idea

  24. Riese – the world does not deserve your talent. I enjoyed that episode so much but this recap was even better!!

    I’ll assume the final episode will be Tina and Carrie’s wedding and Bette pulls a…Finley?

    • Seconded. I love her so much already. Must be protected at all costs, etc.

      Honestly she feels like one of the most lived-in characters this show has ever had, in just one episode. Rosie was spot on in every moment, the writing was great, and she felt precisely like someone I have always known and always loved.

  25. I desperately want the episode where Shane had sex with 8 hippies in a yurt on her 30th birthday

    But the hill I will die on is that Bette and Angie have absolutely have steamed buns before! I can see Bette being dismissive of them but Angie doesn’t seem like she would go along with that game. They’re not an uncommon food!

    • right! i ate steamed buns twice last week and I live in los angeles, so based on my own personal study of this sample I agree with you entirely. i thought actually that they were gonna have it be a thing where carrie didn’t know what they were but Angie did or Bette did and that would be another like conflict moment

  26. I wish the writers had created a storyline in which Carrie is more self-confident about how she looks like and knows that she is beautiful. It would have been amazing to see an older butch lesbian whose looks don’t conform to normative beauty standards being sure of herself and her looks, knowing that she is sexy. I get that many found her exchange with Tina touching, but it was framed in a way that the normative beautiful Tina said to Carrie “I think you’re beautiful” (implicitly: even though you are not “objectively”). It made Tina look like a benefactress, and Carrie reacted like she should be grateful that Tina gave her that compliment and is in a relationship with her in the first place. It was not on eye-level. The story line is played on Carrie’s expense and on Rosie O’Donnell’s. I hate how many horrible comments Carrie is getting on numerous sites (e.g. “Why is Tina together with her if she looks ‘ugly’”… ugh…) and I hate how the writers position Carrie as vulnerable to shitty treatment by the thin characters in the upcoming episodes (my assumption). The way it is set up is that the normative beautiful characters in the show look at Carrie condescendingly which is mirrored in the way many viewers look at her and repeat this very notions.
    Having said that, this particular storyline (Carrie’s insecurity regarding her looks) would be not as bad if there were more butches in the series whose beauty do not conform to normative beauty ideals and who are more confident about their looks and bodies.

    • I have to say I was more bummed by the bumbling-ness they’ve written as her hallmark than this piece. Totally agree that I feel like they’re doing this character dirty – because, like, why can’t we have a more “traditional” butch (as opposed to Shane’s “L.A. butch / butch-wearing-eyeliner” look) who also gets to have swagger? – but I saw it more in the way her schtick seems to be being clumsy/unclassed in comparison to Bette.

      I found the exchange where Tina called Carrie beautiful very sweet and authentic. Everything else – the goofiness about the mailbox, the groupon, the scallops, etc – felt like they really undercut the hotness of a classic working class butch, which is partially conveyed through how much they know how to HANDLE themselves and are supremely capable in spite of society wanting to dismiss them as schlubby.

      I get that they have to play up Bette being super cultured and wealthy, but that doesn’t mean working class people need to be “dumbed down” in comparison…and Carrie’s not even technically working class; she’s a lawyer!

  27. I cackled the entire way through this recap, and I am so so so glad they’re back!!

    The back to back Cones of Dunshire captions had me absolutely howling, so yes, I am your exact target audience, Riese. Also lmao yes a wedding is 10000% a photoshoot!! Thank you for being so public about this bold stance!!!

    PS I watched this episode on Sunday night, but going forward I’m going to watch on Friday nights I think!

  28. Thank you for this quote that summed up the last lesbian wedding I went to: “Forces outside of my control compel me to cry even though I do not believe these two women should marry.”

  29. K just felt the need to get this out there…just rewatched and my main takeaway is that Carrie is the best, Bette is not a good person, and that’s that. I’m just gonna put it out there — I want Tina to stay with Carrie. No more TiBette.

  30. It’s so apparent in these episodes that while I love the OG lesbians, they are just… not on the same level acting wise as the new crew??? Am I the only one that feels this??

  31. Great and hilarious recap! Love the analysis of Dani and Sophie’s relationship. Very much on point.

    Anyone else super confused by this Lena Waithe as Eddie thing? Back in season one ep2 Sophie said the Alice show got a call from Lena Waithe about wanting to be on… how can Eddie and Lena Waithe exist in the same universe??

    FYI, I think my fav line of the episode was Nat with “I have heavy lids” lol.

  32. I enjoyed this article so completely. The wit, the panache, the deep knowledge of the original show sprinkled throughout via parenthetical thoughts and asides. The photo captions in particular had me chortling. Bravo, Riese. I will be back for more, and am immediately making a $100 donation to AS out of sheer appreciation for you and your craft.

  33. I am finally caught up on this show and my notes are:

    +OH MY GOD DO NOT HAVE SEX IN AN ELEMENTARY SCHOOL PARKING LOT, Nat and Alice, that’s got to be a crime of some sort! Cars! Have! Windows!

    +We are all team Carrie, love this for us

    +Angie has the maturity of an ANGEL and her mothers should listen to her

  34. Riese I love what you wrote above: “Regardless; that’s always been the thing with these two: they don’t really see each other, but they’re long past the moment in their relationship where that failure had any hope of getting corrected. They’ve got incredible physical chemistry. They love love — love being in love, love loving each other, are electrified by the rush of taking each “next step” in their relationship. Sophie admires Dani’s ambition and conviction and she knows Dani will always take care of her. Dani needs Sophie’s playfulness to keep her from getting too serious. Both of them are convinced they are ready to settle down.

    But a long time ago Dani decided who Sophie was and what Sophie wanted, and since then, to Dani, Sophie’s always been 50% actual Sophie and 50% Dani’s idea of her. When they fight, Sophie’s angling to bring her real self to the surface, to be seen, and when they make up, Sophie doesn’t necessarily feel self-actualized, but she does seem to feel safe and honored. Those are good feelings to feel, although they’re not necessarily feelings that engender a sustainable relationship.”

    I had mixed feelings about this episode. I binge-rewatched the first season the previous week and was so excited for s2 (I had a BIG wish list for things I’d like to see) but this episode left me kind of… disappointed? And guilty for feeling disappointed.

    I’m not a massive fan of “time-jump” season openers. I get why they’re used but it sometimes feels like a lazy way to skip the storytelling and expect the audience to fill in the gaps. I’m not entirely sure how much time is meant to have passed, either – did anyone catch this?

    One of my big wishes for s2 was for Dani and Sophie to work through their issues. Not necessarily stay together for the long haul, but at least address some of the shit that went down last year. I wanted to see this because I felt they were a bit inconsistently written the previous season, with the writers piling one manufactured drama after another at them each episode – some of those conflicts were realistic and valid, others felt tacked on to raise the stakes, and were often forgotten by the next episode. I also desperately wanted Dani’s dad to be wrong about Sophie. About her running when things get difficult. So initially I was relieved to see them together in the cold open. However this quickly turned to disappointment when I realised they were doing a by-the-numbers “one partner has a big secret, can’t find a way to share it and then BOOM it comes out at the worst possible moment” storyline. I know it’s a soap opera so a lot of my wish list was unlikely to happen, but as someone who watches primarily to fall in love with and care about the characters, and less so for soapy drama, I just wanted to see Sophie come clean at the earliest possible opportunity (way before this episode started!), the fallout from that and then watch them find a way to move forward, in whatever direction that may be.

    The other reason I wanted to see more of them was for the class conflict issues raised last season, but it feels like these have been ditched in favour of the wedding crasher drama. We never got to see the resolution of Rudolfo accepting Sophie into the family, or the two families embracing both their shared values and their differences. This was such a potentially rich storyline and it feels like it’s just been tossed aside.

    Not a fan of the lesbian poker game, it didn’t feel fresh or new and was a weird situation to throw Shane and Tess into. We’ve seen poker, we’ve seen Dawn Denbo and her Lover Cindy, we’ve seen other women comparing themselves to Shane. It felt like an awkward throwback to the original series. The “white women colonising black lesbian spaces” part also felt off to me; however as a white woman myself I am more interested in how WOC found these lines.

    So Tess, an addict, worked first as a bar manager and now as a dealer at a casino? I don’t know if I’m overreacting here but these just don’t seem like particularly healthy or advisable situations to throw her into? I could just about buy her working in a bar but continuing to work into addictive situations so soon after a relapse felt irresponsible. I hope we get some more info about why she ‘needs’ a second job – did she quit Dana’s to work on her recovery? Is Dana’s still open? Enquiring minds need to know.

    I do NOT ship Tess and Shane, though I suspect very strongly they are going to end up together this season. I love Shane but I haven’t forgiven her for sleeping with Tess’s girlfriend last season and contributing to her tailspin. Tess deserves so, so much better. I could maybe accept a scenario where they have a casual thing if Tess is calling all of the shots. I just don’t want to see her hurt again.

    I too would die for Carrie – hooray for butch representation! I’m struggling to believe her and Tina as a thing so far, but I’m only one episode in. I do see what they’re trying to convey with Carrie making space for Tina in a way that Bette struggled to. Again I have a feeling she might exist purely to be a brief foil to Bette before she and Tina inevitably end up together once more.

    Last rant about the Dani/Sophie/Finley drama – it doesn’t ring true for either Sophie or Finley’s characters. Rudolfo has accused Sophie of being somebody who runs when things get hard, but we haven’t seen anything to back this up until now. I’m not sure I buy Sophie ordering Finley to stay in Kansas, nor her deciding everything is fine and to plough ahead with marriage on the basis of Finley not being around. (And what happened to her friendships with Micah and Dani? Are we meant to believe she simply cut contact with them all?) And it cheapens Finley’s character to have her burst into the ceremony at the last minute like that. She’d started on a journey towards personal growth right at the end of last season and I really wanted to see her get into therapy this season to process her trauma and start healing. Not wait until the worst possible moment to do something that ultimately is unbelievably selfish.

    Things I did enjoy:
    – this recap, obvs
    – Carrie
    – Angie
    – Gigi, the agent of chaos (minus the cheap shot at Carrie)
    – Sophie and Dani’s night out (minus the context)
    – Alice treating Sophie with a little more respect
    – Sophie’s suit at the rehearsal dinner
    – Bette’s criteria for a partner
    – Maribel’s wedding look

    Sorry this is so long! Hoping I’ll have a more positive ramble after episode 2 :-)

  35. ALSO, don’t know if there are any other Wedding Industry Queers in the audience . . . but as a florist’s assistant, I can 1000% confirm that Dani and Micah are holding Dani’s bouquet BACKWARDS for the entirety of the wedding. This fact distracted me for the whole final scene, and continues to haunt me.

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