FRIDAY OPEN THREAD: Tell Me About Your Shoes

tea party (just image)

image by rory midhani

Hello there, jubilent seal pups! It’s Friday Open Thread, the forum for all your conflicted feelings about the ethical dilemma of vegan leather, the fact that you really actually like pumpkin spice lattes, and the validity of call-out culture. Or just for your selfies and updates on your furkids and/or human kids. Whatever you feel deep in your heart.

Fur example, this is a picture of my wiggle pig, who kind of looks like a pumpkin spice latte, if that latte was poof-fairy-godmothered into a guinea pig.

photo by KaeLyn

But we’re not gathered here today to look at pictures of my furchildren. We are here to talk about shoes.

Yes, that’s right, shoes.

I do a lot of small group facilitation and one of my favorite icebreaker questions is to ask people what the shoes they are wearing say about them. For some people, shoes are utilitarian and straightforward. For others, they must perform well by some metric of comfort or durability. For the fashion-conscious, they must be super swanky/adorable/bad-ass/dapper or whatever your style aesthetic is.

For moi, my shoe style has changed over time. I used to be into pretty much only heels. Boots with heels. Pumps with heels. Sandals with heels. Flip flops with heels. Platforms. Kitten heels. Stacked heels. Chunky heels. Stilettos. Heels, heels, heels. The flashier and vampier, the better. I liked to stand out (and still do). I loved the authoritative sound of click-clacking heels coming down a hallway, announcing my arrival. I felt powerful in heels. I felt like I can not be fucked with. It was a personal challenge to be able to strut in the highest of high heels. I’d gladly suffer the self-flagellation of shooting pains in the balls of my feet for a very pretty pump.

My heels of yore.

My heels of yore.

I was wearing heels 24/7 in college and for a few years after. I was really impulsive back then and feeling like I couldn’t move fast enough from one thing to another. I was trying on different ideas of who I was all the time. I was courting danger or the illusion of it. I was lurching forward. Everything felt like the very most important thing. My shoes matched my life.

I still like a good heel, but not for anything lasting longer than three or four hours. I’m much more into the comfort of flats these days, though I’ll still choose style over durability or practicality. I wear a lot of pointy-toed flats and flip flops. I seek embellishment in the style of the shoe, not the height of the heel. I like decorative buckles on knee-high boots, funky patterns, chrome details, and patent leather embellishments. I still like my shoes to be a focal point, but also want to be comfortable in them all day. My life has changed a lot over the past few years and things like long-term planning and stability and home-work balance are my priorities now. I care less if people see me as authoritative because I just feel I can be. I still like to rock a stiletto or platform pump, but I look for things like comfortable insoles in my heels now. I recently gave away my last pair of 5″ sky high heels because I put them on and literally could not walk. I guess I’m just more pragmatic these days.

My sensible grown up shoes. (That platform pump isn't as intense as it looks and it's a comfort brand.)

My sensible grown up shoes. (That platform pump isn’t as intense as it looks and it’s a comfort brand.)

So what about you? Do your shoes say anything about who you are or where you’re going? Do you have a very favorite pair of shoes? (I don’t. I have too many to choose just one.) What shoes are you wearing right now? What did you wear today? Do you have different shoes for work and for play? Are there fancy shoes that you really covet, but haven’t purchased because of money or practicality? Do you value comfort or fashion more or in what ratio? (I’m like 40/60 right now in my life.) Tell me about your feet and what you put on them, yo!

Or just tell me about your week and if you finished that whole pizza by yourself. How’s your love life and your home life? Are you back in school or are your kids back in school or both? How are you spending your last days of summer?

Spill it, beans.

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KaeLyn is a 40-year-old hard femme bisexual dino mom. You can typically find her binge-watching TV, standing somewhere with a mic or a sign in her hand, over-caffeinating herself, or just generally doing too many things at once. She lives in Upstate NY with her spouse, a baby T. rex, a scaredy cat, an elderly betta fish, and two rascally rabbits. You can buy her debut book, Girls Resist! A Guide to Activism, Leadership, and Starting a Revolution if you want to, if you feel like it, if that's a thing that interests you or whatever.

KaeLyn has written 230 articles for us.


  1. Personally, I would go barefoot all the time were that an option!

    I hope everyone has a good Friday and a good weekend.

  2. I freakin love these Mary Janes I bought last week. I liked them so much I bought them in navy sparkle too. They remind me of some awesome camper Mary Janes I had which were charcoal grey and had a silver moon embroidered on the left shoe and stars on the right. I called them my Now Voyager shoes except I had both the moon and the stars.

    Otherwise my day shoe is below.
    which of course screams lesbian dog walking sensibleness but after breaking my ankle and foot in three places chasing my puppy on a country footpath in sandals I’ve learnt my lesson.
    I guess my shoes say I can take off whenever across the hills or along a high school corridor as and when required.

  3. (gonna TRY to post an image) (will probably just be gibberish)

    Just got these bad boys:


    and took them out on my first rainy-day bike ride and they are mostly water proof so yay!

  4. I’m wearing the same blue keen sandals I’ve worn all summer. They say “my feet are covered and not too hot” and also “my shoes slip on” and possibly “I’m unlikely to slip should the need to ford a stream arise.”

  5. I’ve been a sneaker head for well over a decade, and it’s great that my feet haven’t grown since (Let’s give it up for shorties with tiny feet! Woot! Woot!) then. I have everything from some killer deadstock early 90s Filas to an Adidas Superstars collection that would make RUN DMC jealous. What can I say, sneaks are my thing; but my favorites are Chucks. Gotta be hi (I do have two pairs of lows) and always with cuffed skinny jeans.

    An amazing woman that I have thing with (we’ve known each other for 7 years, didn’t really hang out with her in college, but just recently reunited and reconnected…long story for another post haha) I send her pictures of my shoes almost everyday, because I’m “Head over Chucks” for her. Yes, insert me being a cheese ball here. These are the ‘Murica ones I’m rocking today. Not shown is the eagle on the other side.

    • “Head over Chucks.” That’s adorable. Also great fodder for a tumblr, just saying. Could be a cute story at your commitment ceremony / wedding / anarchist pagan handfasting / whatever.

      I really want to see the Eagle. As a fellow 90’s teen, I am so glad that Chucks are coming fully back again…not that they ever went anywhere, really.

      • She sends me pics of her shoes, because she’s “Head Over Keds”. I will admit, her phrase is much better, but I’m not ditching my Chucks anytime soon!

  6. I love heels and would wear them all the time if possible, but I do a lot of walking (no car) and find that they are just too uncomfortable for that. So, I wear them on special occasions or when I will not be walking much.

    Any tips for wearing heels more when walking is necessary? I’m not talking, like, hiking, but 20-60 minute stretches of sidewalk walking.

    Also I have some discomfort (that I am really trying to get rid of) of being too “done” in the super casual city I live in, where people are like “you’re so dressed up!” when I’m wearing heels. See also: being self-conscious about having high femme aspirations and passing as lazy/regular femme in a city of birkenstocks and no make up (no judgement, I love my birks too). I’m working on it. Would LOVE any tips or support.

    My all time treasure of prized shoes are my python 4″ Ferragamo pumps, a huge splurge at a time when I was making a decent income. I adore them. They are a work of art.

    • I can totally sympathize with feeling too “done up” for your city’s vibe! My hometown is in the rockies and standard casual wear is technical outdoor jackets, hiking boots and flannel. Every time I go home to visit I feel like I have to pick and choose what to pack and what to wear. But at the end of the day it comes down to what makes you comfortable. Sometimes I feel like I don’t have the energy to feel like I stand out when I’m just trying to pick up some beer and leg it back home so I find a compromise that blends in but still feels like me, and sometimes I dress to the nines and stare down anybody who feels like commenting. The people who know me well are used to it and just accept that my idea of casual and their idea of casual don’t line up.

    • I feel you on the “small town femme” thing. I grew up in a rural area near a conservative area of New York and besides being the only Korean (other than my sister) in any given place, as I came into my queer identity, I also became the weirdo wearing BRIGHT COLORS and LEOPARD PRINT JACKETS in a place where nobody wore those thing. It felt like an all-caps sort of situation being so visible everywhere, though it was kind of my normal, too, you know?

      I think if you can reframe your thinking of your style as “standing out” instead of “sticking out” you might come to a happier place with your femme fashion feelings. If someone says you’re dressed up, just be like, “Oh, really? These are just my everyday heels. You should see my dress-up ones!” And they will be like, wow this girl is confident as fuck. Or not. But who cares? You look great! And so cool! Like you’re from the city or something!

      Wearing heels longer than lengths of time is not the easiest. I can do about 3 hours in uncomfortable heels and 4-5 in comfortable heels. Slightly longer if I’m not on hard floors or pavement. My suggestion is to add cushion. Either buy heels with built-in cushion like Aerosole shoes or get those little gel pads you can slip into your heels. You can get ones for the ball of your feet or the heel of your foot or both.

    • I am just the same: would love to wear heels more but do too much of walking and standing in a day, so if I do actually wear heels for a day my feet need like two weeks of flats to recover afterwards…
      Anyway, my dance teacher told me that she holds classes where they focus on learning to dance in heels, but that it’s also really great for one’s walking-in-heels skillz – it includes both technique and strength exercises so that should mean improved endurance as well. I don’t really have time this autumn but might try it in the autumn.

  7. I am so excited that fall is on its way so I can wear my comfy boots again!

    Which reminds me. Ten years ago at Urban Outfitters I bought this cheap pair of witchy unfinished combat boots and they were my absolute favorites and I wore them into the ground in college and they were an integral part of my slouchy holey-stockinged witch Halloween costume each year.

    They now have huge holes in the soles and they’re not appropriate for work but I still wear them every year for Halloween and it’s the one day of the year that I honestly feel completely like myself based on what I’m wearing.

    I will <3 those boots forever :-)

    • OMG I also keep a pair of old combat boots from college. I just can’t get rid of them. We have been through so much together! They are knee-high lace-up boots with just the right balance of sexy femme and pleather domme.

      Never let go of your favorite boots. May they live on forever and be passed down in your family to future generations forever and ever amen.

    • Find a good shoe shop locally and see if they can resole them! You’d be surprised what can be done to restore old favorites!

  8. I just moved to Spain, and there are so many beautiful shoes here but none of them come in my size! D: Several reliable sources warned me that this would be the case, and I tried to bring everything I would need, but styles here are very different than the U.S. There are so many adorable shoes to choose from and I just want to cut the toes out so I can wear them! D: I shall proceed to the minefield that is online shoe shopping…

    Also, I just moved to Spain! I am feeling wonderfully overwhelmed, trying lots of food that I had never even heard of, and assuming every building is a castle until told otherwise. My meager high school/college Spanish is being pushed to its limits, but I am also learning SO much every day. I am still in that stage where everything seems wonderfully magical and the city is full of unknown delights; get at me in six months when I’ve started whining about how everything is different and I can’t find ranch dressing anywhere.

    • assuming every building is a castle until told otherwise

      What a great lens for experiencing the world.

      Spain sounds like a huge and very exciting place to be! I hope you are partaking in lots of tapeo!

      • Ah, how lovely – this reminds me of Don Quixote’s habit of taking inns for castles and ordinary girls for fair maids and princesses.

  9. I used to be that person who went barefoot in one pair of toms for the three months of summer we get in Canada and worked cafe shifts in the same single pair of toms only to reach september with an embarrassing foot tan and the scraps of what maybe used to be canvas slipper-sneakers trailing behind me in the dust but then I got sick of how expensive toms are given the quality of the shoe and how hard it is to track down the few vegan pairs they make so I went hunting and discovered keep company! They’re a vegan shoe line out of LA that sells the sort of these-are-canvas-shoes-but-also-alt-fashion-somehow fancy sneaker I imagine everyone in LA wears while they bask in weird neverending summer. The pair I’m wearing today is mustard yellow and glorious.

    On a shoe-related note the gap pal and I have been cohabitating since the start of the month and the biggest storage struggle has definitely been shoes and clothing. Between us we have over 20 pairs of shoes and a good five leather jackets and four denim jackets and a couple of anoraks and enough sweaters to drown a series of toddlers. Our entryway looks like the mudroom to an entire commune of tomboy-femmes.

    • Yeah, I feel you on shoe storage issues. Waffle has so many shoes and so do I. We don’t know where to put them. Right now they kind of live in and around these two shoe racks that are really inadequate.

      Thanks for the tip on Keep Company! MooShoes also carries some Tom’s-like vegan slip ons, I think!

  10. Has anyone tried to new Chucks that have the Nike lining in them and are supposed to be super comfortable? Worth it?

    • Not worth it in my opinion. I found zero difference other than the higher price. I tried them and I didn’t buy them. If the flat sole of Chucks bother you, wear a thicker sock for better cushion. I find “old” Chucks to be comfortable, so I might not be the best to talk about the new “comfy” ones.

    • I have Nike Janoski SB lunarlons, which are made of the same stuff as the chucks. I have original Janoskis too and they’re actually more comfortable than the lunarlons…

  11. I’m wearing purple Tevas at the moment. They’re super comfy!

    In other news…

    So, my fiancée has been questioning her gender identity for the past few months, and earlier this week, came out and said that while she’s still not entirely sure how she identifies, or what pronouns she’s comfortable with (hence my defaulting to female for the time being), she’s pretty certain at this point that she’d be more comfortable with a more male body (although, at the same time, emphasized she has no interest in identifying as a man or with masculinity, which she considers a “confining and toxic farce”).

    It’s a bit ironic, given that our positions are almost exactly reversed from where we were a year and a half ago- when I was coming to terms with the fact that *I* was trans, and my decision to ultimately transition to female. So, in a lot of ways, I understand totally what she’s going through (and vice versa).

    With that said, it’s still been a lot to process. I spent most of Wednesday lying on the couch, sobbing, but having gotten that out of my system, I’ve been able to think about it more rationally and at this point I’m starting to get more comfortable with it, even a little excited for her. It’s also helped me, serendipitously enough, better accept my own gender identity (I realized that one of the reasons I was freaking out as badly as I was, was because part of me, on some level, was still subconsciously operating under the assumption that I was a straight dude (along with all the internalized homophobia and misogyny that entails), even though that’s been demonstrably false for quite some time now).

    She hasn’t decided if, or how, she would transition physically yet. I know, depending on what she decides to do, there may be changes that I’ll have to adjust to and grieve for (just like she had to do for me)- but on the other hand, part of my own transition process has been coming to terms with my own bisexuality (I think at this point I’m a 4.5 or so on the Kinsey scale), so I’m not too worried that I would stop finding her attractive, even if there were things that I missed. Plus, I’m pretty certain that this is the person I want to spend my life with, regardless of gender- I can’t really imagine being with anyone else (and, in any case, we’re nominally poly, and there’s been a long-standing rule that if there’s anything that you can’t get within the relationship, you’re totally allowed to ask for permission to go out of the relationship to get it, so even if I do suddenly get a hankering to be intimate with another woman, I’ll be ok).

    What still scares me a bit isn’t so much how things could change between us, but how societal pressure and expectations will be affected. I worry that we’ll end up being sucked back into the closet of heteronormativity (though, on the other hand, our relationship was never particularly heteronormative even when I still IDed as a man), or that she’ll change her mind and decide to embrace masculinity after all (though, honestly, I don’t think that’s a particularly likely outcome, given her background and experiences). I like the freedom from expectations that being queer has given me, and I really don’t want to give that up (though, again, I don’t think she does, either).

    I also worry how it could affect how I relate to the queer community. I’m already somewhat invisible as a femme-identified woman, and I’m not sure how I’d deal with the additional invisibility that bisexuals are subjected to. I fear I’ll have less of a place in queer spaces, too (even though I still firmly believe I have every right to be there, for multiple reasons, and will fight for it if I have to). And while neither of us have any intentions of being stealth (in fact, even though I “pass”, I’ve actually been making myself more visible as a trans woman as of late), it’s still something I fret about.

    Of course, if she does choose to go the route of being trans-masculine but gender-noncomforming/genderqueer, it could have the exact opposite effect of making us *even more* visibly queer (and further queering our relationship, as well). But I feel like it’s still to early to tell if that’s where we’ll head up, even though that’s what I’m hoping for.

    So, yeah. Like I said, it’s been a lot to take in, and even though I’m handling it a lot better at this point and remain confident we’ll figure out a way to make things work, some reassurances definitely would be appreciated in the mean time.

    • It sounds like, if nothing else, y’all have a fantastic foundation and you’re approaching the whole thing from a place full of love…so that’s very lucky for the both of you! It’s a lot, and life does that, so with the hope of not sounding awfully cliche, I really do hope the best for you on the precipice of life’s next adventure.

    • Thanks for sharing all of this! I strongly feel that if you are both queer and identify with queer community, you belong here.

      It sounds like you have an amazing, strong partnership and are capable of growing together and supporting each other in being your best selves. I feel really confident that you will both figure our what you want and need.

      Bi erasure and queer erasure is a real thing. Whether your partner is cis, trans, or gender non-binary, if they use male pronouns, some people will assume you’re straight or straight-passing. Thanks, heteropatriarchy! And some queer folks will look right past you. But if you both choose to be out and queer, you will definitely be welcome in queer communities (that don’t suck) and you don’t have to prove anything to anyone.

      <3 Good luck to you both!

      • “But if you both choose to be out and queer, you will definitely be welcome in queer communities (that don’t suck) and you don’t have to prove anything to anyone.”

        Honestly, I almost kind of figure that any queer community that would give me shit for being with someone who identifies as something other than female/being bi is also probably going to give me shit for being femme and/or trans. So, at a certain point, I’m not even sure how much that would change things.

        “<3 Good luck to you both!"

        Thanks! It's going to be tough, but hey, we've already made it through this once before, I figure we can do it again

  12. I wear the same pair of sneakers every single day. Suede Pumas. I’ve been wearing ’em for years. I just buy another pair of the same shoe when they get holes in the rubber, and then only if it’s particularly rainy.

    They fit right, they look good, and they’re durable. That’s all I really need.

    The only time I wear something different is when a specialty shoe is required. Hiking boots on a hike, sandals on the beach, etc. And if I can go barefoot without injuring myself, I do.

    I don’t actually know what that says about me! I know why I do it, but I don’t know what other people think. And as for what the specific shoe says about me, I really, REALLY don’t know. I’ve never been able to parse the language of fashion.

    • Hmm…I think it says that you know what you like. And you like to know what you’re getting. And when you find something that you know you like, you commit to that thing.

  13. Vans in the spring, chaco sandals in the summer, blundstone boots in the fall and winter! Rarely deviating from these seasonal choices, I have actually been considering getting some clark desert boots because I think they look cool! Hoping to expand into the dapper footwear world when I have the money later.

  14. I’m an adidas gal. The sneakers fit my narrow feet just right and they last a loooong time. I still wear a pair I received as a xmas gift when I was first-year in college (10 years ago). I’ve added a few more along the way. Two more pair of adidas and chucks and 2 pairs of dress shoes. Right now I’m wearing a pair of adidas high tops. Comfy and casual and darn lucky my work is all about it.

    • Yes! Adidas shoes are the best. I was on the Nike train for a while, but I think I’m about to pull the emergency brake and hop off. They just don’t fit like Adidas shoes do. And they don’t last as long either.

  15. Happy Friday! This is my first post! I figured, after reading Autostraddle for years, this was the perfect post to intro me to Autostraddle Comment Land.

    Well, my shoes…I have had a love-hate relationship with my feet my whole life. I have very, very flat feet. As a kid, one of the many podiatrists I saw called his colleague into the exam room to gawk at how flat my feet are. So, shoes were a sore spot for me for many years.

    But then I got older (yay for maturity!) and realized that these wonderful feet carry me everywhere I want to go, and they deserved my love. I now relish in spending money on good shoes. At the moment, I am wearing a pair of Helen thong Mephistos (these are sooo worn out, but I LOVE them and can’t stop wearing them!).

    I also covet Fluevog’s…who else is with me?!!?!

    • I have super flat feet too! Like, completely flat, no arch to speak of. My feet are also very wide and very long (picture pancakes with toes), which means shoe shopping usually turns into a game of “What am I willing to settle for?” I have found that shoes with arch support actually hurt my feet, and I am most comfortable in the super flat shoes that most people seem to dislike.

    • Welcome to Comment Land! Your initiation package is on its way.

      I know someone who has Fluevog’s and loves them and thinks they are the best and most comfortable shoes in the world, so…

  16. I JUST BOUGHT SHOES!! I just got a pair of Adidas sambas, which were my shoe of choice in junior high, despite the fact that I’ve never played soccer a day in my life. I’ve been wearing pretty much exclusively converse since high school, but I can’t handle working at my retail job in converse anymore, which I guess means I’m officially old because wearing bad shoes makes my back hurt.!Since I had to break down and buy comfy sneakers today, I decided I may as well revert to my pre-teen fashion ways and get the Adidas. I don’t know if I’m really in love with them though. They look more old-man-like than I remembered. Did my parents really let me wear old man shoes as a kid?

    At school I wear the same black ballet flats every single day. I’m pretty sure they are intended to be school uniform shoes, but whatever. I buy them at kohls once a year in August for like 19 dollars and I throw them away every June because at that point they start to smell too bad. I teach high school and shoes are a big deal to teenagers, so I spend all day being jealous of my students’ shoes when I’m stuck in boring black flats.

    I do have a change jar where I’m saving up for a pair of chacos to complete my lesbian camp counselor look. I’m having a hard time justifying them because they are $100 and we aren’t actually allowed to wear sandles at the camp where I work, but I still really want them…

  17. WAIT KAELYN WE NEED TO BE HERE FOR YOUR FURCHILD BECAUSE OH MY GOD WHAT AN ADORABLE PUMPKIN-SPICE-LATTE-CUM-GUINEA-PIG. Also, i do really like pumpkin spice lattes. I don’t care who knows, i do really like them. Giggle at me all you like!

    I am constantly in need of new shoes, it seems. I keep buying the super cheap ones from Five Below & then realizing why that’s actually a bad idea. They’re not good for walking, & i walk a lot, usually. They have thin soles that can be easily worn through, & the slip ons have insides that are just barely glued in, & will move around while you’re walking. Sometimes they even try to escape the shoe. I really need a good pair of sneakers, but when i tried to rationalize buying a pair of Converses– the sole is so thick!– my parents dissuaded me because of the price. But the sole was so thick.

    I have a pair of boots that i got from Payless that i wear so so often, & it shows. I wore them to 2014’s A-camp. I had to get them re-heeled, & now the heel & sole of one of them is trying to leave the rest of the shoe. The leather or pleather or whatever it is is scuffed & missing in places. I want to see if i can still get another pair of them, to have a “nice” pair for when i feel dressy. Because i also don’t have dressy shoes, which is a problem when things like funerals happen, or when i want to attempt to look pretty. But i like these boots; they also sound nice on hard floors. They have a good subtle click sound to them, & i really like that sound.

    This post is basically reminding me that i need so many shoes, even though i have shoes that i don’t wear anymore lying around. I bought an expensive as hell pair of leather shoes from the ren fest years ago; they lace up & you’re supposed to adjust them & they’re supposed to contour to your feet. But i don’t wear them, much less take care of them (being leather & all). Then i have shoes with really pointy tips, which are also not good for walking because they hurt after a while. The aforementioned boots have a wide, curved toe, so i can walk in them comfortably. Even Converses have a pointy, narrow toe instead of a nice rounded one. What gives? I want to walk a lot & not have to worry about my feet hurting! Geeze.

    ANYWAYS YOU GUYS this thing is coming up this weekend, Small Press Expo, & i am EXCITED! Ive actually been able to assemble a little compilation of some of my mental health/illness comics that i’ve done over the past year, & i’m going to try to sell them or trade them. They actually look really good! I’m printing some right now. Home printed & hand assembled. My Dad found a big stapler for $15 in Office Depot’s clearance; all the other ones were like $40. It was magical. The stapler is magical. It looks like a weapon. With it, i could– dare i say it– rule the world.

    I’m also excited because it means hang out times with friends, & i get to meet up with at least one Straddler. My friend’s mom bought us a hotel room, so we can be there both days, & she’s not letting any of us pay her back! But on the down side, my friends have been going through a lot. My friend who’s coming from NYC has been depressed, & my other friend is feeling her own depression over losing her father a month ago. I’m really hoping that SPX is good for them; they deserve it.

    Also Dúrin, my pup, has been doing so well lately! We went to Petco to get him some stuff, & though he seemed a little overwhelmed, he did great! He also pooped in the store. I turned around & suddenly, poop was happening. I was mortified until an employee told me it happens all the time, & showed me where the bags were. So far i’ve only ever had Dúrin poop in our front yard, which i take care of with a shovel, so this was my first time hand-scooping his poop. IT WAS WARM AAAAAAGGGHHHHHHHH help.

    After that we went to a brewery to get dinner because there’s a food bus (yes) parked out at the deck there, but we (my family & i) also got beers. There were a fair amount of people there, & another dog, too; a cute black dog named Luna, who was celebrating her 5th birthday, so we gave her a treat. I was kinda nervous about how she & Dúrin would interact, because she seemed much more forward & Dúrin far less sure, but everything went okay & Dúrin was very good & he chilled out & everything!

    Then yesterday i had to give him his foot bath– he has an infection– which he does not like. I talked to him the entire time (mostly various forms of “good boy”) & even though i could tell he was stressed, he was very patient & didn’t try to jump out! I’M SO PROUD OF MY LIL NOODLE.

    And if you’ve read this whole thing (sorry it’s so loooong), here’s an ADORABLE PICTURE of Dúrin in the bowtie my mom got for him!

    (If you want to stare at my dog often, you can add me on Instagram; my username is lossen_. I post pictures of him a lot.)

      • Eeeee, thank you! Everyone seems to think he’s cute & it makes me all happy & puffy because HE IS SO CUTE. :)

    • I’m Grinch that haaates twee things, but that picture made my heart grow 3 sizes.

      My dog used to pee with joy or excitement and you know what made her reaaaally happy? Yes that’s right Caity-Cait, Petco.


        What is it with Petco? Is it because they can smell everyone who’s been there before & they just get excited & they’re like “I EITHER GOTTA PEE OR POOP THIS IS SO EXCITING”??

        Peeing with joy, though, oh my god. “I’m so happy to see you i juST GOTTA PEE”


          It could be anything from happy excited, to scared anxious or just y’know ‘new dog’ unused to spaces that smell of other dogs that are not for doing businesses, to pupppies being puppies, to territory marking. So many possibilities smells.

          It was more like “SO HAPPY LOST MAH BLADDER CONTROL SO HAPPEEE” and she’d end up doing it anywhere despite having been housebroken within 3 days. If it’d happen within the “house” tho she’d kinda get…pouty. Shame-faced?
          Goofy expressive dog.

    • Oh, Dúrin’s gorgeous! His bowtie is A+, too. Looking v. dapper!
      As for sudden poopage, unfortunately it does happen though not too often in my experience! Once Moggy pooped up someone (yes, up) and I felt like I might cringe myself into nonexistence from the sheer embarrassment, haha.

      Have a great time at the Small Press Expo! \o/

  18. Converse Star Players all the way. Preferably blue ones. I don’t have very many shoes and Converse are definitely my default.

    I really don’t like shopping for shoes, but I’ve recently been making more of an effort to acquire fun socks. Currently wearing a pair that feature the Golden Gate Bridge and an orange monster.

  19. First I’d like to say how grateful I am for my feet. They’re under appreciated. I look at my hands and face but just stomp on my feet. But they serve me well! I work 12 h shifts and am on my feet all day! And on my off days, I walk and hike for miles and miles. And my feet rarely give me pain. Thank you, feet.

    Shoes – I should probably be nicer to my feet. I’m still wearing a pair of old goodwill sneakers I got over a year ago. They’re sketcher tone ups and soooo comfy!!! But they’re old and worn. My other shoes are Walmart sneakers. I have 3 pairs total, all tennis shoes, no dress shoes. I am cheap with shoes, probably too cheap. I should invest in good walking or hiking shoes.

    My weeks have been busy with work and the outdoors. A couple weeks ago I took a ferry to Vashon Island with my mother – it’s not very far away, but I’ve actually never been there. We visited Maury Island Marine Park, with long stretches of beach and a few short trails through madrone forests. The Tacoma-side ferry terminal was located at Point Defiance park (one of my favorite local hangouts), which had gardens of GIANT dahlia flowers in full bloom! We also walked around the Tacoma Glass Museum – we didn’t go inside, but walked over the bridge of glass and around some glass sculptures. I walk down there occasionally from my apartment, but it was her first time I think. The bridge of glass isn’t made of glass, but it has blue glass sculptures on the outside and glass art lining window displays on the interior. The actual museum is a big dome where they blow glass.


    Sculptures by the glass museum in the sunset

    The bridge and the glass museum dome

    Maury Island Marine Park

    Beach forts!

    I’ve been enjoying some of the queer books and authors recommended on the FOT two weeks ago! Some stuff by Emma Donohue, Julie Anne Peters, and David Levithan. Trying to break out of my non-fiction routine.

    I love that autumn is finally here. I picked a harvest of tiny apples on a tree along the beach. I made my first pumpkin dish of the season! (It was quinoa-rice-vegetable concoction). Pumpkin spice lattes are okay, but a bit overrated. I love fleece and flannel. I love the rain, though not the cold. Larches are my favorite fall tree because they’re a unique kind of deciduous coniferous tree, with needles that turn yellow in the fall, and they’re found only at high altitudes. I haven’t seen a larch in some time. I need to take a backpacking trip to see the larches. But I’m rambling.

    Larch! (unfortunately, I can’t take credit for this photo.)

    • What gorgeous pics! Thanks for sharing!

      I’ve never seen a larch. It looks like something out of a Dr. Suess book!

      • Yes it does! I love Seuss stuff. Larches are so beautiful and charming and brave. Do trees have personalities? They’re hardy enough for mountain winters and are daring enough to go against all conifer stereotypes!

    • Dude the glass sculptures look amazing!

      I agree that feet need to be more appreciated. Mine rarely give me problems, either.

      • Yeah in the shower the other day I was thinking “my toenails are ugly.” Then I thought- “who cares?? My feet are awesome and they serve me well!!”

  20. First time attempting to post a picture, let’s see if this works!

    Basically, I found these boots four years ago, wore them every damn day for two years, until I’d worn holes in both of them. But I didn’t want to stop wearing them, so I bought the same boot all over again. Same style, size, and colour. And now it’s been two more years, and they’ve gotten pretty worn out again, and it looks like I’m going to need to buy a third pair. What can I say, when I find something I like, I LIKE it. Plus I wear these with EVERYTHING. They look best with jeans, obviously, but I can wear them with leggings as well, and I have a few dresses I can wear them with, either with socks or tights. About the ONLY thing they don’t work with is sweat pants or workout gear, with is upsetting, but I guess you can’t have everything.

    Steve Madden Troopa Boots :)

  21. Aaaaa, your guinea pig is the cutest! <3

    I tend to go the comfy route for shoes, though a bit of cute and/or badass never hurt! Mostly I seem to wear boots. Like big, chunky, good for stomping around in boots. Besides that I’ve got a cute pair of blue hi-top Converse my Mum got me that have sheep all over them, and some cheap slip on shoes for when I’m too lazy for laces! :P
    Heels never really agreed with me. Apparently I waddle when I wear them, even though I think I’m walking normally? Yeah, think I’ll skip the penguin impersonations and stick to flats, haha.

    At the moment I’m not exactly in school, but I am trying to learn new things by way of online courses!
    In the past I’d just look up the info and try to goad myself into reading/absorbing it because if it’s all there why waste money on courses, right? Suffice to say, that never worked for me because I’m just not that great at learning new stuff without someone to lead me a little. Anywho, I started using Udemy recently (for anyone who’s interested, all their courses are £15 until midnight PST so you can get some pretty great deals atm) and it’s working out pretty great so far!

    Moggy also had a super birthday! \o/
    I mean, this photo doesn’t really do the day justice but that’s purely because I told her she couldn’t eat the cake just yet and she has this habit of fleeing from food she’s not allowed (I guess to resist temptation?)… she wandered off twice before she let me get a picture, both times managing a stealthy lick at the peanut butter bones as she passed by.
    Once I had been humoured with a photo op she and Bonnie got a piece each, which apparently was enough to inspire Mog to check the carpet thoroughly for the rest of the day just in case she’d missed any crumbs. What can I say? She takes after her mother.

    • I’m the same way with classes; I love learning bits and pieces of random things that interest me, but to learn a whole curriculum of something I need some gold stars on my chart or it’s not gonna happen. I have signed up for so many online coding programs, completed the first two exercises, taken a celebratory break and never started back up again.

      • It’s the worst, isn’t it? I get so proud of myself for doing the first few exercises, but as soon as I shift my focus onto something else I lose all momentum. :(

      • I’m so lucky she doesn’t understand the internet… If she had any idea how many lovely strangers pay her compliments she’d be absolutely impossible! ;)

  22. Adidas sneakers all year, every year, also for work.
    Alternately: For the very hot summer days sanuk flip flops, for the very cold winter days a pair of fur lined Doc Martens.
    And the occasional pair of brown leather boots for a conference or nice dinner,etc.
    However, I’m trying to switch my life over to Oxfords in an attempt to grow up/fancier. We’ll see how that goes. I already managed to graduate from Converse to adidas, so I’m hopeful.
    That aside: My week has been crazycrazy, contributing to my theory, that God is a producer and playwright and I live in a TV show.
    Also, 2015 is a year full of round anniversaries, like today, which would have marked my Grandma’s 90th Birthday. I’ll toast to her, and hope that she’s proud of me, wherever she is.

    • Aww <3 you're so sweet about your gran. I'm not expert, but I think grandmother's sign an affidavit promising to love and be proud of their baby grands. :)

      • You know, when we went to the doctor’s once, and she had gotten blood drawn, I put the band aid on her arm in the waiting room, which prompted her to tell everyone in that room that I was in med school.
        I was SO embarassed!
        But while the rest of my family was always rather suspicious of me going to University and being a weird nerd, my Grandma was always, always supportive, proud and loving.
        In every way.
        One of the last times I saw her, we had a bit of a fight, where she told me to cut my hair short so I’d find a girlfriend.
        My Grandma, who was more afraid of me being alone than caring whether it would be a girl or boy.
        Or how I wore my hair:-)

  23. Once I read that if you want a new wardrobe just buy some nice shoes so I bought some Timbs and now my look is “femme construction worker”

  24. I’m running a ton in prep for a race next weekend, so I’m mostly wearing my goofy looking running shoes when I’m not barefoot. Running shoes…why must you almost always be so crazy looking? In the grand scheme of things, these are by far not the loudest pair of running shoes I’ve ever owned, but still. When I’m not barefoot or in running shoes it tends to be all black Chucks (hi-tops) on my feet.
    Also, I’m realizing that this will be my first winter living in New England…what in the world am I going to put on my feet?? Suggestions? I’m imagining that between running shoes/snow shoes/cross country ski boots, I’m going to have to put other things on my feet. Will pry just try to find some boots that I think can still look sharp/dapper with pants. Totally open to suggestions. Hope everyone has had a great week and looking forward to the weekend!
    Here is an image of my current running shoes:

    • BOOTS. Waterproof boots. Ideally with fur or flannel lining. If you get regular non-winter boots, at least waterproof them with waterproofing spray.

      • @kaelynrich Thanks!! yeah, that’s what I’ve been looking into. The fortune/misfortune is that I work in the outdoor industry, so the variety of choices I have access to is a bit overwhelming.

  25. I don’t have a favorite pair of shoes right now, but I am partial to Nike skateboarding and basketball shoes as they very comfortable to just stand and walk in. But, right now I am generally wearing unisex shoes as it make me feel more queer(if that makes sense). Question though, why are men and women’s shoe size differently? Like what’s the logic behind that, and why couldn’t they have just made a unified standard?

    At some point this week my father pretty much said I will never understand your gender, before proceeding to gender me again. I like to think positive and call it a win. I also changed my diet up this week(as aforementioned in the fitness post earlier in the week). I think I lost 1lb, and my stomach maybe a hair smaller now, but then again this could all be a placebo effect. Other than that, my week has be fairly quiet.

    This was finished the other week. I think it was done by a woman, based on the twitter handle being shared.

    Thank you for viewing and reading my post. Have a positive weekend!

  26. I just bought by first pair of Doc Martens this summer! They were on super sale and I bought them in Portland, which has no sales tax, so it was most definitely the most affordable way to get Doc Martens. I didn’t even have to spend all the money I had been saving for them.

    Sadly, this week is not going well. On Wednesday, my roommate and best friend at college told me that she is leaving. She’ll be gone, stuff and everything, tomorrow night. It was totally out of left field, and I was so caught off guard that I still haven’t even really processed it. We had so many plans, and we have been excited to live together for a whole year. She’s also a HUGE part of my support system. I don’t even know what my life in Los Angeles looks like with out her. So it’s been a hard week.

    But, at least I can come here and talk about shoes, and that helps. :)

    • Yay on your first Docs! Life achievement unlocked.

      Super sad about your friend. I hope she is leaving for good reasons and that you can continue to be close and to support each other, even if you aren’t roommates anymore. My close friend moved recently and it sucks, but we can still get on the phone and catch up and it’s like we’re in the same time zone again.

      On the making new friends front, are you connected with the LA straddlers group?

  27. I have two favourite pairs of shoes. The first is a pair of maroon converse shoes that I wear almost everyday and have recently had to replace because they had a hole in them and it’s nearly winter :(

    The second is this pair of boots I bought last week.

    I got them to get me through winter and they are so comfy and so gay and make my (enormous) feet look tiny. So all positives there :D

    • Ooh, these are cute, what are they?

      – Fellow human with enormous feet who will take any suggestions she can get.

      • I got them from New Look (I’m in the UK, don’t know if you are) for £30, which is not bad at all! And I love them <3

    • You’re not a grandma, you’re just likely unfamiliar with html.
      And besides ‘coding’ even tiny things like a picture can go sideways just because of a typo no matter how familiar someone is with a programming language.

  28. My daily life shoes may suggest I’m a grounded practical person, but really they’re saying I have flat feet, skinny heels and joint issues.
    Men’s tactical boots are the only boots I can comfortably fit my orthopedic inserts and that’s fine by me I love tac boots.
    Other than those it’s a pair of blue and silver supportive tennis shoes bought on clearance from an athletic store, 2 pairs of supportive sandals and traditional crocs for doo-doo duty or the dog park.
    One of pair of the sandals are black and just a smidge too feminine for me, but they’re black and so lightweight, perfect for being sneaky. The other are bleh colour, but well made and do their job. Both tighten just right without chafing my heel.
    The crocs are the same colours as the Florida Gator’s gator logo and I got them in this giant barn store that sold all of the things, but not LSU-coloured stuff because SEC rivalry reasons.

    I have a strange relationship with impractical foot wear that’s kinda like my strange relationship with dressy lady clothes, but not quite.
    Take me to a store with standard lady’s shoes and I’m like a comedy act. It’s bit of fish out of water like Julie in VS, with some sort of strange Daily Show-esque commentary, and circusy balancing act. Note I did ballet for about a decade and the balls of my feet are still pretty tough and I can cartwheel in pumps to give you an idea of where my shenanigans can go.

    Footwear everything is funny, and just fine. Even if I have pretty princess moment and buy something I’ll never wear in public more than once because that is the nature of some high heels. Limited public use and audience.
    Clothes it’s different there’s some level of guilt with all the lady clothes that I have and don’t wear out, but can’t let go of. They’re pretty and I look great in them, but the way people respond to me in them is not great.
    The appreciations others give me and feeling of nakedness (because let’s face it lady clothes are thinner and expose more) just gets to me.

    I was going to mention some of the shoes I have that are not a daily life that I love, but it turned into an goddamn essay.

    Witty Summary: they’re pretty much all heels and give me feels.

    Odd Takeaway: I’m fucking costume shop, once you own boots a stripper could safely pole dance in that’s it you’re probably a costume shop disguised as a human I’ve decided it no arguements

    Sad Sentimental Family thing:
    Black lace up heels in the style of Sister Evangelina’s shoes, which are the kind of shoes I’ve wanted since I was a little kid. Not really sure why, if was because they were witch shoes to little me or because they were the kind of shoes the strong women of my family that I never got to meet wore. The first time I wore them out was Christmas Eve 2014 at funeral of son and nephew of those women.

    Pretty Princess Purchases: The Cinderella heels of 2007, they had rainbow glitter straps you guys. I should have made them a glass case to house them in, also graduated highschool in them because they fit the dress code. Stealthily brought some queer to my first time in a Catholic Church since the age of 7 that way.
    The Beautiful Beasties of 2015

    I’ve yet to wear them in public, but I danced to AC/DC and M.I.A’s Bad Girls while wearing them that counts for something.

    • Let me just pick my jaw up off the floor. Those are some beautiful shoes. Oh gosh I hope you find a reason to wear them out in a safe place because they deserve to be seen!

      • If I find the right top to make a 70’s glam oufit on the razor sharp androgynous side happen they will get seen. Already have the bottoms and accessories because I’m a costume shop disguised as a person just need the right top.
        Shesus bless safe places and spaces.

  29. I have a lot of shoe based feelings. I also have a lot of shoes. No heels all sneakers or boots, or doc marten shoes and one pair of silver glitter ted baker loafers. I see my self as a collector to be honest. It’s easier to justify the sheer volume of footwear that way, and also the wear, or rather lack thereof. Today I wore a pair of Supra Skytop IIs that my missus bought me for My birthday around 4 years ago maybe… They’re buttery red leather inside beautiful black suede outside and hug your foot in a tender and loving manner. Mmmmm. I’ve recently acquired a pair of spectacular willow pattern printed suede doc martens to wear for my MA graduation. They’re stunning. My everyday shoes are mostly a pair of 3 year old navy desert boots that have seen better days but only cost me £6, or a pair of tired grey Nike Air Max lights, depending on what my dayjob requires of me that day. I have a busted old pair of Docs that have seen me through my degrees and are covered in paint, ink, plaster, clay and god knows what else and I’m sure will see me through more. Yeah, lotta shoes, lotta feelings.

  30. HAPPY FRIDAY EVERYONE!!! IT’S FRIDAY! That means tomorrow is a Saturday, the weekend is upon us! So how is everyone? :D I hope y’all still got your hair on.

    SHOES! This is a really good topic. Except I don’t exactly remember what kind of shoes I used to wear in college? Probably plain sneakers. I didn’t know how to dress myself until like 2 or 3 years ago?

    I used to wear these a lot…The Porsche Design from Adidas.

    They went great with jeans and everything else I wore. Then I found these Pumas that lasted me 2 camps. Now I think they’re dead? Either that or the dirt has permanently stuck to them.


    As of late I’ve been using black and gray Chuck Taylors. Which are also my weightlifting shoes. I also have running shoes from Newton which are great on the feet. They’ve helped my knees a whole lot and I feel really comfortable running in them.

    So this post also basically made me realize that I haven’t worn jeans in like 4 months maybe??? It’s either been shorts or chinos. With chinos I have this pair of chukkas from Seavees that I really really really love. They have the dirt of A Camp on them also and the worn it has on has really grown on me. Here they are pristine

    I also have another pair of Seavess that I use on a night out =)

    Chukkas have changed the way I look at shoes. Now I’m saving up for a pair from Clarks which I’m sure I will enjoy using at camp.

    • Ok so what you call a chukka I call a desert boot, 2 countries separated by common language and all that, they are super comfy and I love them. I too long for legit clark’s ones. :)

      • I think I’ve only seen Clarks say ‘desert boot’ IDK if it’s trademarked. LOL.


        Q and Answer: What’s the Difference Between Chukka Boots and Desert Boots?

        Derek writes to ask: What’s the difference between Chukkas and Desert Boots? They seem to be all the rage right now.

        This is a sort of square/rectangle situation. All desert boots are chukkas, not all chukkas are desert boots.

        Chukka boots get their name from polo – a chukka is a period in that sport. They’re a two- or three-eyehole ankle-high boot like the dark brown ones pictured above. They can be made in anything from canvas to shell cordovan, it’s their form that makes them chukkas.

        Desert boots are a specific subset of chukka boots. Like chinos, their popularity stems from WWII soldiers (and surplus-sellers) bringing them home from the war, and the emergence of casual style in the 1950s. They’re based on the boots worn in desert campaigns by British soldiers. They always have crepe rubber soles. The classic style is the light suede seen above, though crepe-soled chukkas come in all kinds of leathers.

      • @dante OMG ME TOO!!!! HAHA!! I’ve been looking at navy ones for such a long time already! Hahaha! I’m halfway between just saying ‘fk it’ and getting them and being like ‘but i don’t need them’ STRUGGLE IS REAL.

        Clarks has this one desert boot that made and collaborated with Herschel and I really love the blue.


    I am, for the first time, meeting up with a girl I met online. I’m meeting someone I found on the HER app at a coffee shop, and this feels so out of my realm, I have no idea how to handle it/what to expect. How does one handle dating apps?

    • I was sooo nervous when I started, but I’ve been on so many great internet dates this past year! Here’s what works for me:

      1. The day of or day before, do something for yourself that makes you feel really confident and badass (go for a run, buy a new top, etc.) so you’ll have that confidence going in.

      2. Set a safety check-in with a friend — let them know you’ll text them partway through the date. Yay for safety!

      3. Set your expectations. What I really mean is, lie to yourself about your expectations. I tell myself “Whomever this person is, I really want to get to know her for the simple pleasure of meeting a new human! And I am kind of amazing, so she will also enjoy getting to know me!” Telling myself that script at least somewhat removes the pressure of that voice in my head that goes BUT WILL WE BE ATTRACTED TO EACH OTHER??? and SHOULD I HAVE SHAVED MY LADY BITS THIS MORNING???

      4. If you get as nervous and self-deprecating as me before a date and/or making small talk at a party, you may need to adopt a slight alter-ego going in. When I walk up to the coffee shop or the bar, I basically play a character. And that character is still totally me, but it’s a version of me who thinks she’s cute, smart, sexy as hell, and worth getting to know. She’s got a slightly different, more confident walk than I do, and when people ask her questions about her life or her day or what she studied in college, she answers as though they might actually find her interesting. (I swear, she’s not insufferable or full of herself. She’s just genuine and reaches out to people in a way that I can’t because some part of my brain tells me I’m not even worth getting to know…WHOA — too deep?) She’s kind of the same character I play during job interviews. And the best part is — she’s me, too!

      LOL I know it sounds a little crazy, but those are the things that get me over the hump and into a place where I can relax and just genuinely enjoy getting to know a new person to whom, hopefully, I’m also attracted. :-D

      • Update: the date went so well! We had such a good time. Thank you for the advice! The day before I painted my nails, and I did a nose peel so that I felt really fresh and good about myself. We ended up not only getting tea but getting dinner and dessert. Yay, thank you for the great advice, I felt confident and awesome :)

  32. I’m in love with American-made, leather workboots. I’ve had this pair of custom White’s for almost two years. They’ve gone through multiple states, back-country, hiking, city streets, through mud and rain (when sealed), and even snow (including salted roads). I feel invincible in these handsome leather ladies, and also 1 1/4 inches taller, which does help too.

  33. I might have a liiiiiiiittle bit of an addiction to floral shoes.

    The Keds I actually painted, when I couldn’t find shoes that matched my thrift store dress and were also suitable for biking.

    Now I’m excited to leave the florals behind, and bust out the boots!

  34. I made these minimalist running ‘shoes’ (slippers?) for $10 and they work pretty well so far. I read a couple different links on how to make them to collect tips and tricks; this link is pretty good to start:

    Definitely use disposable gloves, a drip cloth, and plastic bags around your feet and very good ventilation (such as tornado fan) if you’re sensitive to solvents or fumes. There may be alternative products such as Sugru that won’t be so fume-y as plasti-dip, which uses a pretty intense xylene solvent.

      • Thanks. These rubber duckies were very easy and fun to make. It helps if you are flexible b/c contortions are necessary to paint all the surfaces while not setting the other wet shoe down anywhere heheh. It’s neat how as they dry on your feet, they end up being customized to your foot shape.

  35. Work shoes: Birkenstock black plastic clogs in Narrow, with 3/8″ foam riser under the cork footbed – The plastic can be washed in 10% bleach and doesn’t absorb bodily fluids, so it’s perfect for medical workers.

    Non-work shoes: the same, plus other Birkenstock leather shoes, plus assorted hiking and trail running shoes, plus water sandals, plus flip-flops. Comfort is #1 with me.

  36. Birkenstock Mayaris in mocha and my dark brown Nocona cowboy boots are pretty much all I need in this shoe life.

  37. Oh my goodness. I don’t take pride in much of my daily outfit, but I do take pride in my shoes. For a long time, I refused to wear anything but athletic shoes to school. Then one summer I became a tall person, and I wanted to be even taller, so I tried to incorporate heels into my collection. It didn’t go well. Then I went to grad school and I was able to piece it all together. These days I wear mostly motorcycle-y/combat-y/vintage-y boots. I love them. I really enjoy this brown pair that I have. They make me feel powerful and strong and kind of androgynous on the fashion scale, which is what I definitely aim for.

    This week was a rough one for Watson. I discovered that he is allergic to the puppy shampoo that I bought for him when I first got him. Like, severely allergic. So we went back to the vet today, since he scratched himself right into an infection. The vet gave him the good drugs, though, and this is the scene that followed in the car on the way home:

    But don’t feel too bad for him. He’s still happy as can be, and doing his thing:

    • Aw poor Watson, I’ve got sensitive skin and a food allergy that presents itself as the worst itching ever when triggered. I empathize with the little fella, I really do.

      Badass boots are the best.

    • What a sweet pup. I hope he’s itch-free and infection-free soon.

      I love how the right shoes make you feel like you can take on the world.

  38. First, let’s enjoy this:

    Palladium boots, pretty well all year round, and Brooks Glycerin runners. These are the shoes that make my broken body capable of anything!

    Everyday boots:

    Clincal boots:


    And NOW I can tell you all about the cat I’m adopting! She’s a stray who showed up about three weeks ago, around moving day, thick with fleas. I’ve given her a flea treatment, and I’m building a wall to close my archway and hang a door. Long story short, I’m very allergic and need a room with no cat hair. I got a cat carrier, bed, nail clippers, tray mat, and cat nip through a local rescue, and I got a litter tray, all the free food samples the internet can provide, ten pounds of food from the fancy pet store, and so many cat toys it’s unbelievable. I’m raising funds, by way of knitted slippers, to take her to the vet because I’m already eating beans after all my dollar store expenditures. At long last, I introduce MINOU!

    This is how it alllll started:

    I woke up to her on my step from around 4:00 AM onward. So I bathed her as best I could, and she didn’t swipe at me once. She just pushed away. I can her her flea treatment and was sure she wouldn’t be back. But she returned for snuggles a few days later :D

    The first day I brushed her out to get rid of flea poop, eggs, etc., she rolled over on her back to get her tummy brushed. Since then, this is what happens when I arrive home. She runs up from under a bush and comes to greet me.

    Our first box of discount food arrived (I only had to pay shipping!). She walked home next to me from the bus stop that night. <3

    I decided to put her bed outside, and she wasn’t too sure…

    When SUDDENLY:

    So now she’s mine, folks. I’ve had a couple very generous friends, and I am almost there to be able to bring her to the vet! As soon as I beat this sinus infection I’ve developed from my allergies, I’ll hang that door, and finish up the wall! :D Have a great day people! <3

    • Aww you named her francais pour kitty. Some people think dogs are the only domestic animals capable of expressing affection clearly that is not the case.

      Caretakers can be angels on earth with the patience of a saint. I’m pretty sure the home health care nurses that visit my grandmother have that sort of patience.

    • She’s so pretty! Good on you for taking care of her and giving her a home. I wish you a long and happy life with your new feline pal. <3

    • She chose you! So adorable.

      I have cat allergies too, but have learned that I can eventually become desensitized to individual cats with sufficient exposure. I now successfully co-habitate with my very own cat without any problems. I hope the same happens for you and this cutie-face.

  39. Have you ever shown up for a first date (meet-up, hang-out, encounter, term not really relevant to this anecdote) and been wearing the SAME SHOES?

    I have, semi-recently. They’re not actually popular shoes- I had only ever seen one other person wearing them in four years- but I’m fond enough of them that I am on my second pair. And then we had the same car, but different colors.

    Please help me understand. (Had it been my uber-practical office appropriate Clarks, or the black Chucks I do not own, I would have understood.)

  40. happy friday, auto-ramblers,

    these are the shoes I bought because I started getting plantar fascitis (which makes it hard for me to RUN ANYMORE FAHK)

    I started a new job! I’m a clinical supervisor, which is a title bump but not a $$ bump, because transition from hospital to dinky nonprofit, and right now the nonprofit is in the throes of audit drama, but overall it feels possible, and exciting, and I know I’m a jerk but I’m really happy for it to be fall, and I’m having friends over for a cider/pumpkin donut making party tomorrow, my big plans are a rosh hashanah donut (cider donut with honey glaze) and to figure out maple frosting for the pumpkin donuts with the copious amounts of quebecois maple syrup we’ve received from a friend in recent months.

    And girlfriend and I just had a wedding, which was actually hard and overwhelming and not a glitter fest of all the things I ever wanted a wedding to be, and we are recalibrating back to normal life but also dealing with all the hard weird stuff that happened, but she’s being pretty good about things, but yknow. I feel like the expectation is like “YOU GOT MARRIED BC YOU ARE SO IN LOVE AND NOW EVERYTHING IS PERFECT” and like, no, unfortunately, that’s not how that goes, and we are dealing with ourselves and each other and the fallout of all the pressure and hard feelings, and now we need to recalibrate.

    • Those cider donuts sound like good times! Way to go on job change! And by had a wedding, do you mean you just got married?

      On the shoe front: I also have plantar’s fasciitis, and my Palladium boots saved my life! They are awesome. I also have custom orthotics that fit inside them. :) Likewise, Brooks Glycerin sneakers are great because they’re very padded, but my orthotics give me the hard sole I need. Stretch that calf!

      • they were pretty good! I say that I recently got espoused bc I think that’s more linguistically interesting.

        thanks for the suggestions! feets!

    • Congrats on the new job!

      Wedding expectations can be hard. If it helps, no one has a perfect wedding. Literally no one. If anyone tells you otherwise, they are a liar.

  41. Hello! I have some shoe-based feelings!

    Over the past few years, I’ve trimmed down my shoe collection, eliminating shoes that I didn’t need, didn’t use, or that were uncomfortable. I have 11 pairs of shoes now. This includes specialized shoes such as rock climbing shoes, slippers, sandals, etc.

    I work in a casual work setting, so I wear sneakers or boots on an everyday basis. Today I’m wearing a pair of chukka boots from Vivobarefoot.

    I don’t wear heels and I don’t own any clothing anymore that would be appropriate to wear with heels. I definitely value comfort, but I don’t think fashion and comfort are necessarily mutually exclusive. All of my shoes are pretty comfortable. My “least” comfortable pair of shoes are my fairly comfortable boots.

    My boots are Iron Rangers from Red Wing. They only made brown ones in smaller sizes, and I didn’t want brown boots. So I bugged them a few times on social media and waited patiently in the hopes that they would release black Iron Rangers in smaller sizes. They finally did last year and I bought them immediately. Here are my boots:

    I own two pairs of Converse Jack Purcell shoes, a mid-top pair and this low-top pair–both all-leather:

    I started indoor rock climbing regularly last year, and here are my rock climbing shoes:

    Links if I messed something up in the HTML code above:

    • Such impressive ability to curate your shoe collection!

      Those Iron Rangers are hot! My spouse gets Red Wing boots for work (warehouse job) and they are super durable! Love the leather Converse!

    • I must trim mine down… Good for you on the reduction. Also nice climbing shoes. How do you find the lace? I’ve always been a Velcro person.

  42. Baby queer here, i just bought my first pair of Dr Martens before i go off to college. Best decision ever. They are rediculously comfortable after the break in and make me feel like a badass riot grrl.

  43. My coolest shoes are my HAND PAINTED LION KING CONVERSE that my girlfriend got me for our one year anniversary (knowing that it’s my favorite movie). Even though I’ve had them for almost a year, I’ve only worn them once, I’m too scared of ruining them!

  44. FLATS FOR LIFE. I pretty much live in about 5 pairs of shoes – black ankle boots, white new balance trainers, white adidas superstars, black Birks and leopard print sandals. I’m really obsessing over white sneakers at the moment, I own four pairs and I am lusting after more. I really love the whole oxford, brogue, loafer situation but I can never find good quality pairs that don’t cost like $300+.

    I have one pair of killer black heels that I wear only on very special occasions. Otherwise my other pair of “heels” are more like strappy sandals in a colour that is not quite silver, not quite bronze. In writing this I kept mistyping heels and “hells”, and really, ain’t that the truth?

    • Also I’m on bed rest hell at the moment. Broke my ankle two weeks ago, had surgery on it a week ago. I’ve had to spend the past week in bed, only allowed to spend 15 minutes out of bed per day and I’m so over it! Can’t wait until my follow up appointment on Tuesday, where I find out if I’m rocking a cast or a moon boot for the next little while. #stylish

      So for the next 6-8 weeks I’ll be rocking shoes on my right foot only! Thank gawd I’ll be healed in time for summer – I’m from Australia, so like opposite seasons and all.

  45. This is extremely un-shoe related and not just because it’s something I’ve considered doing barefoot as shoes can/could get in the way of some moves.

    I’ve had this idea swirling round my skull for awhile about a maybe drag striptease routine with various possible details, but after a certain comic strip one possible detail has wormed its way the front of my mind.

    If you’ve ever watched modern modern burlesque striptease you might have seen or noticed how at the end some of the ladies end their act in a particularly tiny pair of knickers or even a c-string.

    Instead of that I was thinking just some very small boyshorts/tightass briefs as the final layer but after that comic strip this popped into my head like woah: a harness situation with a soft packer, maybe if I can swing it one of those little rodeoH briefs.
    Possibly do some wiggling at the end making the packer bounce around a bit…maybe even helicoptering if possible.

    Is that brilliant or in poor taste?
    I have no one IRL to ask or consult in such things.

  46. That guinea pig is so pure, so precious.

    I’m surprised I haven’t seen any Vans kids here! (Or maybe I missed you?) Anyways, I technically have 4 pairs of shoes, but only wear one of them. They are these high-top black Vans with a grey bottom. Soooo cool, I love them. Probably the best casual shoes I’ve ever gotten.
    I was actually a Sketchers kid for a loooong time (like 5 years?) and each time I bought a new one it was the Same. Exact. Model. I don’t know why I did that. I actually switched to Vans when I started skateboarding, cuz flat shoes are p essential.
    The other shoes I own consist of my last, lightly used Sketchers (acceptable for hiking), some torn up slip-on Vans, and black dress shoes that are oversized yet special to me.


  47. I have small, wide feet, so even my “formal” shoes are made by brands better known for sandals or hiking wear because most fancy footwear for women seems to be styled far narrower than my feet. As a result, my dress sandals are Keens, and my nice boots are Tevas.

    Also, an unexpected side effect of getting my bachelor’s degree in Southern California was my acquisition of a semi-permanent flop-flop tan.

  48. I (finally) start work on Monday but I have no work shoes but because I have been sitting on my ass doing nothing for so long I have no money to buy work shoes, so I’m probably going to show up for the first month in my Raya/Eid heels :(

  49. I should also probably mention I have a pair of hiking boots by Lowa. JUST IN CASE I get any les points taken away from not mentioning.

  50. Well right now I’m barefoot. But I’ve been wearing Chocos (Chacos?) a lot so I have weird triangulated tan lines on my feet.

    And when I’m not barefoot or working out I wear Converse. Chucks. Whatever you want to call them. I’ve basically worn nothing else for twelve years.

  51. GUYS!!!

    Viola Davis won an Emmy for Outstanding Actress and her speech her fuckin speeech.
    She quotes Harriet Tubman and gives recognition to other black professionals in entertainment.
    Also her win is history making win.

    Uzo Aduba won another Emmy in a different category than last year and is even more moving than last year.

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