July 2, 2015
Heather: Fuck this shit. If Rory Gilmore is marrying a woman, it’s Paris Geller!
Rory Gilmore and Izzie Stevens: Movie Married
Paris Geller did play gay on that anyone but me web series, though, so now her and Rory are both confirmed lesbians.
Mey: While I do agree that paris is perfect for Rory, Izzie Stevens is one of my all-time favs, so I feel like she’s a good second option.
Heather: Oh no Mey, don’t read my twitter! I just slandered Izzie! Forgive me!
One time Janet Mock and I argued with Mari on twitter about how much we love Izzie Stevens.
Heather: Oh shit, you and Janet Mock are too formidable of a tag-team! I relent!
Mey: Well, you’ve got Mari on your side. Maybe the four of us should fight it out.
Heather: I don’t want to fight with you Mey! I want to learn your secret knowledge of dinosaurs and play Pokemon cards!
Have you ever listened to that NPR podcast Intelligence Squared? I was thinking we could go on that.
Laneia: This has been the gayest conversation. This is gayer than being gay.
Mari: I still hold that Izzie is a terrible character, but I fear the awesome power of the Mey/Janet Mock team-up.
9.5 Hours Later
ATTENTION: Rory Gilmore is playing a lesbian in a movie about lesbians.
Mey: Yeah, Heather and I already stopped being friends because she was trash talking Izzie Stevens.
Riese: Oh I saw that convo on my phone but had no idea what you were talking about.
NOW I SEE.
I AM OLD NEWS.
Abby is dying because she has been in love with Rory Gilmore her whole life.
Heather: MEY I MADE A DINOSAUR LOVE LETTER FOR YOU
Mey: YOU NEED TO APOLOGIZE TO IZZIE, NOT TO ME
Stef: Have been avoiding watching this trailer all day.
I guess this movie is basically made more for the this-dad-in-this-movie than any of us.
July 3rd, 2015
Stef: I can’t stop watching this trailer now.
And finding new things about it that are amazing.
The ultimate mom: “You’re marrying your roommate?!?”
Riese: There’s something about it that feels subdued? Like the trailer feels a bit morose? I can’t put my finger on it. Like it doesn’t feel super ambitious, maybe.
Aja: Maybe it’s because they have ZERO chemistry?
Laura: Yes morose. It seems kinda like it’s about Katherine Heigl’s fraught relationship with her fictional parents. Rather than actually being a romantic comedy thing about a meet cute/overcoming minor obstacles/happy end up together.
Laneia: Twitter (ok, one person on twitter) is already excited for our takedown of the film.
Ok I’m just now watching this and LOL FROM THE WRITERS OF BEACHES. Shut the fuck up universe.
Kaelyn: Maybe “Wind Beneath My Wings” will be their wedding song.
Stef: They made Katherine Heigl look like fucking Charlize Theron in Monster with that makeup.
Like they were like ‘Oh she’s gay, we better make her vaguely scary.’
This is going to be so bad and this should be the next movie Carmen and I get wasted and kicked out of I think.
Help I can’t stop thinking about this movie
Laneia: Have you tried the ice bucket challenge.
Carmen: Stef let’s just make it a column. Let’s just regularly get wasted and kicked out of movies.
Stef: Seriously I was just talking to Phoenix about this movie. I can’t wait.
Phoenix thinks the plot twist is that they are actually roommates.
And only getting married for like, tax purposes.
Gabby: Yo I just watched this trailer :sob::sob::sob::sob::sob::sob::sob::sob::sob: Stef.
I know the movie is gonna make me cry but it’s also gonna make me scream because its gonna be a Lifetime Grey’s Anatomy CW Gilmore Girls Where Is Bette Midler Extravaganza
Stef: Gabby, I wish this movie was about Bette Midler.
This is a movie about that jar of mayonnaise and box of uncooked spaghetti.
The best thing about Jenny’s wedding was when she gave Tim all her organs.