21 Things Raven-Symoné Could Potentially Be Doing Right Now

This was the week that all your Ellen Page questions were answered. Well, at least if your only question was “who does Ellen Page go to Whole Foods with?” But what about your other most beloved young queer celebrities? For instance, what’s Raven-Symoné up to? Honestly, we have no idea. But hey, we can take some guesses.


 

1. Transcribing the plot of the latest Game of Thrones episode into emojis

2. Making a grilled cheese with tomatoes for the meal in between lunch and dinner

3. Helping AzMarie pick out a sleeveless zip up hoodie

4. Researching how much it costs to buy a castle

raven-castle

5. Watching Youtube compilations about Sharmen set to Whitney Houston songs

6. Trying to decide whether she wants to try knitting a scarf or just buy one from Old Navy or something

7. Looking up winged eyeliner tutorials because seriously, who is able to just do that on their own

8. Calling friends but when they pick up she just presses different buttons on the Beyoncé soundboard

9. Riding go-karts with AzMarie and then going to get an Orange Julius. Is Orange Julius still in business? If not, a root beer float.

raven-go-kart

10. Telling her cat how much she loves it and rubbing its tummy while the cat tries to go back to sleep

11. Choosing whether to wear the ankle boots she looks amazing in or the mid-calf boots she looks amazing in (she goes with the mid-calf boots)

12. Getting a macchiato from Starbucks and the barista gets her name right because she’s fucking Raven-Symoné

13. Taking a ceramics class because why not

14. Rewatching Orange is the New Black and getting kind of teary thinking about Suzanne

15. Opening up 13 different tabs of puppies on Petfinder

16. Rewatching Zenon, Girl of the 21st Century and thinking about how she would have made a really good Zenon, which is true

raven-zenon1

17. Getting the background image on her credit card changed to that of a baby panda

18. Making a third attempt at reading Anna Karenina

19. Going back and forth about whether that Buzzfeed list about pugs is funny enough to share on Facebook

20. Wearing a tank top with Kristen Stewart’s face on it

21. Building a pillow fort with AzMarie to watch Goonies inside of

Profile photo of Rachel

Rachel is Autostraddle's Senior Editor and the editor who presides over books and news & politics coverage. Originally from Boston, MA, Rachel now lives in the Midwest. Topics dear to her heart include bisexuality, The X-Files and tacos. Her favorite Ciara video is probably "Ride," but if you're only going to watch one, she recommends "Like A Boy."

Rachel has written 762 articles for us.

33 Comments

  1. Thumb up 13

    Please log in to vote

    Vapid fluff is now my favourite category. Also I just tried to do that thing where you get magic perfect winged eyeliner with a spoon and the results were neither magic nor perfect. Also I couldn’t figure out which hand was meant to hold the spoon. Eyeliner is so hard.

    • Thumb up 6

      Please log in to vote

      i have also tried the spoon thing and been totally thwarted, but was too ashamed to say it in public until now because i thought everyone else could do it. thank you for helping me get this off my chest, i am in solidarity with you re: eyeliner and spoons

    • Thumb up 1

      Please log in to vote

      Okay, this is gonna sound counter-intuitive. But the trick to getting winged-eyeliner perfection is starting from the outside corner, where the winged tip would normally end, and then working your way in. I just feel like this gives me more control. Also. I like using a gel pot of eyeliner and angled brush.

    • Thumb up 1

      Please log in to vote

      Winged eyeliner is harder with liquid eyeliner in a tube than it is with palette eyeliner and an angled brush (I have the benefit get bent brush). So much easier because you can make the eyeliner the consistency you want…just don’t blink too soon!

      • Thumb up 11

        Please log in to vote

        This is the hard-hitting, important conversations that need to be had because I’ve been asking my mom to do my eyeliner and now that I’m almost 22, its getting pretty weird. I want wings so sharp I can slice a hole through femme invisibility.

  2. Thumb up 20

    Please log in to vote

    Ok, so the Vapid Fluff tag is my new favorite tag ever ever ever ever… EVER!

    What a great way to respond to such unfounded criticism about Autostraddle- turn that sucker on its head!

    (Also, it means more Ellen Page and Raven Symone, so win-win? For the next edition of “Vapid Fluff”, can I suggest “What did Angel Haze and Ireland Baldwin have for dinner last night?”)

  3. Thumb up 9

    Please log in to vote

    Guys, this isn’t even vapid fluff. Rachel uses themes of queer and TOTES COSMO culture to symbolize the connection shared between members of the queer community, even through differences in class, I mean fame.

  4. Thumb up 4

    Please log in to vote

    If I was Raven, I’d probably spend 99% of my time sneaking up on random people and saying, “NEVERMORE,” and then yelling, “No one will ever believe you when you tell them this story!” as I’m running away.

Contribute to the conversation...

You must be logged in to post a comment.