Tag Yourself: A Quiz to Find Out Which Grease Bats Character You Are Once and for All

If you got mostly As, you’re Andy!

You are a sexy mess but you have a heart of gold! You love and are devoted to your friends even though they frustrate you when they don’t just wanna do exactly what you want to do exactly when you wanna do it!

If you got mostly Bs, you’re Scout!

Anxiety mixed with hopeless romanticism makes a tough mix. You have too many feelings. You’ll get over your ex eventually, stay strong! By the way, it’s really cute how you don’t realize how cute you are!

If you got mostly Cs, you’re Gwen!

You’re successful, opinionated, and don’t take shit from anyone – but you’re also so kind and understanding! You might worry that you don’t look “queer enough” or don’t “fit” into the “community,” but screw that. You know who you are and so do your friends!

If you got mostly Ds, you’re Ari!

Being human is exhausting and bizarre and you have a critique for every institution. You mostly want to be left alone but treasure your few close friendships. You’re comfortable with your introversion and have never experienced FOMO.

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Abeni Jones

Abeni Jones is a trans woman of color artist, educator, writer, and designer living in the Bay Area, CA.

Abeni has written 91 articles for us.


  1. I keep taking screenshots of these questions/answers because they are cracking me up and SO PERFECT! I got mostly A’s but a surprisingly number of D’s as well! I was born FULLY FORMED hahaha!

  2. I’m a Gwen who is probably not bi but is too Libra rising to admit it.

    Also yes, I am femme especially when I’m holding a hammer.

  3. Love this quiz!

    My scores were 70% Ds, and I’m not surprised in the least. The only differences are that I sometimes do get a little FOMO, and I keep most of my critiques close to my chest (though I still have them!)

  4. I feel like I made Ari sound like kind of a killjoy but you have to imagine her warmly smiling while saying all of those things ☺️

  5. We are all Grease Bats characters on this most beautiful day.

    I thought I would be all Scout all the time, but there is a surprising amount of Gwen to me. I absolutely loved Gold Star Bisexual. (Can we get that on a t-shirt?)

    • you know, funny you should ask! i came up with “gold star bisexual” and i even made shirts of it! i used to sell them! they didn’t sell well tbh. lol.

      if there’s enough demand i could make more :)

  6. Scout, I actually figured that one out at the last post already and had a mediocre life crisis.
    Now I‘ll actually have to google what soft butch means.

  7. i knew it was over @ question 1. I’ve been swaddled in the same “LMBR CNTS” shirt since i found it in a gutter in june.

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