It’s been almost a week since 2016 came to an ugly head and one of the four horsemen of the apocalypse got put in charge of our entire country. It’s been one hell of a week. Literal hell. But I’ve been finding it really important to do something I’ve been calling “mining for joy.” I’ve been seeking out anything and everything that brings me joy so that I don’t feel so defeated I never get out of bed. Joy is my yellow sun, and the more I get, the stronger I’ll be for the fight.
Friends are my number one joy-bringers; I never feel stronger than when I’m with them. But TV is another joy-bringer for me. And TV that tells our stories and tells them well, especially in this time when representation is more important than ever? Well that makes me feel like I could leap tall buildings in a single bound.
Let’s get some plot stuff out of the way first.
Mon-El is having a hard time figuring out his place on this planet, and even though Kara keeps singing “I’ll Make a Man Out of You” at him, he is still not as swift as a coursing river, so when he comes at things with the force of a great typhoon, he tends to make a mess of it. But he doesn’t WANT to be a hero, he just wants to get drunk.
A brilliant side-effect, though, is he Kara sozzled on some alien booze and it’s fantastic.
![supergirl-206-1](https://www.autostraddle.com/wp-content/uploads/2016/11/Supergirl-206-1.png?resize=640%2C360)
I’d love to see her drunk fly though.
Also at the end he gets kidnapped for trying to be a good guy and talking to what he thinks is a homeless person but ends up being a Cadmus minion.
Meanwhile, on the other end of the spectrum, James is getting hella whiney now that Kara doesn’t have a crush on him and he’s basically inconsequential. So he demands Winn finish his supersuit and starts showing up at alien crime scenes looking like a rejected version of a Cyberman and calling himself Guardian even though you’re not supposed to name yourself because when you do you end up calling yourself something stupid like Guardian.
The monster of the week is a terrifying looking alien that was living in a frozen wolf and decided to some eat scientists studying climate change. Kara makes it disappear like it’s a polar ice cap. (Sorry, bad environment joke. I’m just trying to get to the Gay Stuff™ faster!) The only other thing you need to know about this storyline is that the alien sucks the life out of Kara and J’onn, and Kara gets better but J’onn is going quick, so Alex asked M’gann to help.
![supergirl-206-2](https://www.autostraddle.com/wp-content/uploads/2016/11/Supergirl-206-2.png?resize=640%2C360)
Pretty lady, kinda shady.
She is hesitant but it’s his only shot at survival so she gives him some blood. It’s unclear what exactly the mixing of white and green martian blood will do — all we know is that she was concerned that it made his hand shaky — but I’m sure we’ll find out soon enough.
IT’S SANVERS TIME.
Let’s start with the first time our sexy duo sees each other this episode. The whole gang is in the gaylien bar (I guess I should know the name of it. Is it just called Dollywood?) and Maggie checks in with Alex to see how she’s doing. Alex kind of backpedals and tries to make the whole thing an un-big deal; maybe she just ate something funny! It’ll pass! But Maggie looks her in the eye and tells her to embrace her big gay feelings because they’re not going anywhere.
She says, “You’re real.” She sees her. And she’ll be there for her. She tells Alex that the first thing she did when she realized she was gay was start coming out to people, and they have a coming out conversation like I’ve had with so many queer women before. I actually got dizzy — I call it the Killing Me Softly effect — because it felt so real, I didn’t know how to handle it. (Little did I know this was nothing compared to what was to come.) It was just two adult queer women in a bar talking about coming out.
![supergirl-206-3](https://www.autostraddle.com/wp-content/uploads/2016/11/Supergirl-206-3.png?resize=640%2C360)
YOU’RE REAL.
Alex knows she has to tell Kara, and Maggie says she’ll be there to have a drink with her when she does.
So Alex invites Kara to take a walk by the river, and Kara knows something’s up, but Alex is dancing around the words. Finally Alex decides to talk about Maggie instead. It’s easier that way. So she tells Kara that she has…feelings…for Maggie.
![supergirl-206-4](https://www.autostraddle.com/wp-content/uploads/2016/11/Supergirl-206-4.png?resize=640%2C360)
Gal pal feelings?
She can’t really look directly at her sister while she says it. And Kara isn’t exactly jumping up and down about it; in fact, she has questions. Has she always felt this way? Has she ever been with girls before? Alex says no she’s never been with a girl, but maybe she has always felt this way. And then she talks about the truest thing, something that every single queer person I have ever talked to has been able to relate to: She’s seeing certain things from her past in a new light. That best friend she had in high school who she pushed away after a few too many confusing sleepovers? The Pink Ranger trading card she used to kiss goodnight before bed every night? (Oh was that one just me?) Maybe these feelings have been there all along, she just never realized what they meant.
![supergirl-206-5](https://www.autostraddle.com/wp-content/uploads/2016/11/Supergirl-206-5.png?resize=640%2C360)
Every good lesbian story has a Feelings Bench.
Kara still has more questions but Alex is done with this conversation. She was hoping for a little more support from her sister, and she’s a little raw from baring her soul, so she stalks off. Which also happens to be my method for dealing with talking about my feelings. I share for like three minutes, get dizzy, and have to run away. (So I ended up coming out to my parents in a car on the highway halfway between Boston in New York.)
Later, after Kara gets knocked down in a fight, Alex asks if they can talk again, but Kara says she’s not hurt and walks away, which is salt in Alex’s wounds. But Alex can’t leave things like this between them, so she goes to see Kara at her apartment. She admits that she feels like telling Kara the scariest thing that she’s ever told anyone didn’t go like she planned and she’s afraid Kara isn’t okay with it.
![supergirl-206-6](https://www.autostraddle.com/wp-content/uploads/2016/11/Supergirl-206-6.png?resize=640%2C360)
Chyler nails the face-feelings.
Kara interrupts her right the fuck there. She is so okay with it.
![supergirl-206-7](https://www.autostraddle.com/wp-content/uploads/2016/11/Supergirl-206-7.png?resize=640%2C360)
UNCONDITIONAL LOVE Y’ALL
What was bugging Kara wasn’t that her sister was having Feelings for another woman. What was bugging Kara is that they were best friends for her entire time on Earth and Alex never felt safe enough to talk to her about it. Kara says their whole lives were so focused on keeping Kara’s alien-ness a secret, it didn’t leave much room to talk about other secrets, and she feels horrible about it. But one thing she does know is how lonely it can be, to keep part of yourself from people you care about. So she tells Alex the one thing she needed to hear from her sister all along: “You are not alone.”
![supergirl-206-8](https://www.autostraddle.com/wp-content/uploads/2016/11/Supergirl-206-8.png?resize=640%2C360)
We all needed to hear that, Kara. Thank you.
These two, man. Right in the feels, every time. Now that they have the heavier stuff out of the way, Kara asks about Maggie. And Alex SWOONS. She gets all smiley when she describes her, and when she calls Maggie beautiful, she realizes how good it feels to speak the truth out loud so she says it again.
![supergirl-206-9](https://www.autostraddle.com/wp-content/uploads/2016/11/Supergirl-206-9.png?resize=640%2C360)
“THOSE DIMPLES THOUGH.”
They get called in on a rogue alien situation then, and Kara literally says, “I’ll go get the alien, you get the girl.”
BECAUSE THIS SHOW.
So after all the alien stuff and whatever, high off a successful coming out to her sister and defeating the big bad of the week, Alex skips into Dollywood, coyly asking Maggie if she’s ready for that drink now. Maggie’s so pumped for her, and says she’s buying the drinks all night. But Alex wants to skip that part, so she takes Maggie’s arm and pulls her in for a kiss.
![supergirl-206-10](https://www.autostraddle.com/wp-content/uploads/2016/11/Supergirl-206-10.png?resize=640%2C360)
!!!
Maggie’s hand lingers on Alex’s elbow, but she pulls away from her. Alex looks like she’s never been so happy, and she tells Maggie she’s wanted to do that for a long time. She says it like it’s a truth she didn’t even know the full trueness of until she said it. And Maggie just looks at her for a moment, knowing what she wants to say next, not wanting to be the reason that smile fades. But fade it does as Alex asks her if she did something wrong.
Maggie explains that it’s not that Alex did anything wrong, it’s just that she knows that right now, in the post-closet high, colors seems brighter and everything tastes better, and maybe an intense friendship with a lesbian feels like more. She says that this is a journey Alex has to take by herself, but that she is still ready, willing and able to be there for her as a friend and buy her all those drinks she promised.
But Alex doesn’t want that, so she politely excuses herself while trying not to cry right there in the bar, ignoring Maggie’s protests.
Alex goes home and tries to dull the pain with some booze, but when she misses work without calling, Kara comes over to check on her. After some pleading, Kara gets Alex to tell her what happened: She put herself out there, and she got rejected. Maggie doesn’t feel the same way, and she’s humiliated. (Which…to be fair, Maggie didn’t say she didn’t have feelings for her. She just said relationships don’t work out between baby gays and vets. Which implies maybe she would rather be in a relationship with Alex that worked out? After she sorted her feelings? Maybe? Anyway.) Alex got to the top of Mt. Feelings and she went tumbling down. Kara holds her as she sobs the most heartbreaking sobs I’ve ever seen or heard. But Kara wraps her arms around her sister and holds her tight and tells her that she’s proud of her for being so brave.
And okay, it’s time for Feelings Corner, because this scene ripped open two real wounds on my heart. They’re older wounds, mostly healed, but they still ache with the rain. And my friends it hath poured.
So let me tell you what I felt in the wake of Alex kissing Maggie, Maggie pulling away, Alex running away. Let me tell you how I have been on both sides of this.
Let’s start with Alex, and the reason that a kiss gone wrong left her sobbing in her sister’s arms. Alex said it herself. She feels like a kid again. You’re in your 20s but all of a sudden you’re feeling all the things everyone else was feeling when you were 13.
Alex opened the closet door and took a big gulp of fresh air for the first time in her life. She felt high and unstoppable and decided to sprint out of the closet instead of testing her balance. So she tripped. Maggie tried to catch her before she fell on her face but that just made the whole ordeal more embarrassing for Alex. So now she’s devastated. She’s not crying just because Maggie rejected her. She’s crying because when she started running out of the closet, it was on a clear path to Maggie. But now that path is blocked and she’s still out of the closet and everything so bright and new and scary.
Before I came out, I fell in love with a girl. It hit me like a ton of bricks, and then I was holding that ton of bricks, and I didn’t know what to do. So I told a friend, gave them a brick. I used code at first, avoiding gender pronouns like a champ. But eventually it didn’t even matter anymore, coming out was something I had to do so I could talk about my feelings about this girl.
![supergirl-206-14](https://www.autostraddle.com/wp-content/uploads/2016/11/Supergirl-206-14.png?resize=640%2C360)
I didn’t do it on a bench but you get the picture.
Once she was supposed to come over to my place (my dorm; I was a senior in college) and watch Buffy with me. I didn’t sleep the entire night before. I couldn’t. I tried. I literally Googled “symptoms of being in love” because I wasn’t sure if that’s what it was. (Google told me that being in love could feel like you’re doing speed just all the time, and I’ve never done speed, but that still feels right somehow.)
To make a very, very long story short: it didn’t work out. She said she loved me back, but couldn’t be with me. Her reasons were different from Maggie’s, but my heart was broken like Alex’s. I had finally acknowledged my queerness out loud, I had fallen for someone who was also queer, and I was rejected. I was 22, Alex is “almost 30”, it doesn’t matter, like she said, you feel 13. No matter how old you are, they’re brand new feelings. No other rejection or breakup ever mattered as much as this one. No other person mattered as much.
Was it because they were great and also queer? Was it just some sort of queer imprinting? Like when a baby duck hatches and decides the first thing it sees is its mother? It’s hard to say. Either way, the feelings were raw and real and all-consuming.
Fast forward to ME being almost 30, out and proud for years now, and I’ve been in Maggie’s shoes, too. I know what it feels like for someone who is newly out to tell you they have feelings for you and to not be able to trust it. I know what it feels like to have to try to tell them that without sounding like you’re invalidate their feelings; you know it’s real for them.
And you know there’s a chance it could be more than imprinting, but you’re not sure your heart wants to take that risk. I know what it feels like to try to say no while also trying not to ruin the friendship. And Maggie just got out of a relationship where she thought she had something special and she got dumped, hard. So she’s probably feeling pretty shitty about herself, which means she’s probably closer to my general, everyday mindset of, “This person is obviously mistaken about their feelings because I am not worthy of someone having a crush on me.” So of course Maggie pushed back, of course she told Alex she needs to find herself by herself and not use Maggie as a crutch. Of course that’s how she feels.
But I bet Maggie didn’t feel great about breaking Alex’s heart. I bet it made her sick to her stomach, because she cares about Alex, and she knows how hard coming out is. But she knows it’s for the best. Or she hopes so. (I’m not implying that I broke anyone’s heart. I just hurt their feelings and it sucked. But Maggie saw Alex’s face crumple. She knows a broken heart when she sees one.)
Alex just needs to get her queer lady swag on, maybe go on a few hilarious bad dates, find some queers to have Bad Lesbian Movie Brunch with, and THEN go back to Maggie and tell her that her feelings are real and not going anywhere. Or maybe they can’t be together now, maybe instead they’ll be best friends and each other’s wingwoman. (I think this is a better IRL scenario; I don’t have a lot of faith they’d bring more queer characters into the fold on this show, so I’m more apt to hope they work things out.)
But either way we haven’t seen the last of Alex’s coming out journey, and I’m sure there will be more feelings to drown in. But hey, you’re feeling, right? Me too. And after this week, that’s something. That’s really something.
![supergirl-206-16](https://www.autostraddle.com/wp-content/uploads/2016/11/Supergirl-206-16.png?resize=640%2C360)
Same, girl. Same.
Another excellent review. Thanks for the hard work and bringing feelings to light with words.
Thank you!!
That choking, gasping sob that Alex does at the end is so heart-rending. How did Chyler Leigh do that?
That gasping sob literally broke me. That’s when the tears started coming fast and hard. She was just amazing at the feelings in this episode.
Chyler’s acting, everywhere, every scene, oh my god. The way her face falls as she turns away from Maggie in the bar; the sort of choked laugh that became gut-churning fear after Kara says “You get the girl”; the desperately hopeful look on her face after the kiss. It was all so so perfect. She just nailed every damn scene.
The woman is perfect
Every Alex scene in this episode was gold, and Chyler Leigh did such an amazing job I really can’t rewatch the final scene with Kara when Alex is so mortified, so heartbroken. I’m still a bit incredulous that we’ve gotten to watch a coming out journey that is so *real*, so tenderly and achingly depicted with a character we already knew and loved.
Kara being there for Alex, particularly in their scene at Kara’s apartment, was beautiful. And SO IMPORTANT to see on our screens right now in these somber post-election times.
Thanks again for your recap, Valerie (so agree on the idioticness of the James/”Guardian” storyline), and for weaving a bit of your own history into it. I think so many of us can relate to all of Alex’s painful moments, and although I don’t want her to suffer toooooo long, it will make her eventual happy (hopefully Sanvers!) time that much sweeter.
Thank youu <3
I must be some sick freak cuz that last scene with her crying in Kara’s arms I’ve watched it like a dozen times so far, just keep watching it and crying along with it each time.
I’ve been waiting all day for that recap, thanks! I’m enjoying how this series is handling this whole situation with an adult perspective on things and considering it’s a superhero tv show, i’d give extra points to the screenwrites who are not underestimating their audience. That said, here’s what I predict for the next two episodes: 2×07 – alex will avoid maggie, maggie will try to talk to alex, but things are way too weird between then. 2×08 – alex will play the cool & professional one while maggie flips out which will turn into a kiss at that last minute of the episode… meaning: december will last forever (and people will have extra time to write fanfics and design wonderful #sanvers gifs to our daily life situations)
Yup, agreed!
I don’t think a kiss will be their first move in that direction. Obviously Maggie is being both cautious and supportive. She’s being mindful of steps, so I could see Maggie expressing her interest by asking Alex on a date. A real date. That would be the turn toward the right direction for them. I mean, can you imagine an adorable goodnight kiss? I don’t even think the writers will give them the “turn toward” in a meer two episodes, so perhaps what you’ve said is closer to the break. Don’t know, but I like what you’re thinking.
Hi Carol, I wanted to come back and say, “Damn, you called it.”. :)
Carol! You were totally right!
You nailed it!
Great review. So many of us have been on one or both sides of that equation. Thank you for sharing your story. :)
Also, I am pure Sanvers trash. They will happen. This is classic slow burn and while it’s killing me, at least it gives me something to look forward to while the world burns.
ALL OF THIS. I have so many feelings about this episode, but two stood out:
1. Alex coming out to Kara was….just spot on. She still hasn’t said she’s gay, and dances around it, but it’s fucking terrifying to say the first time, and sometimes it takes awhile. Plus, digging up those buried memories and feelings from when you were younger is PAINFUL AS FUCK.
2. Alex’s pain in getting rejected- so real. Most straight people have their first heartbreak as teens, but for most (not all ) queer people it’s later in life. There isn’t the training that straight people have to handle it too- they see that reflected on tv, in books, and their friends are right there to help. If you aren’t out (or newly out) you don’t have that giant group of friends to help. You don’t see yourself in tv and media to help you navigate those feelings.
Also, Chyler, Melissa, and Floriana just brought all their acting chops to this episode. The facial expressions, the nervous twitching, it was all just so awesome.
After the election, I was so broken, so devastated, I decided to skip work Wednesday and stay home and bingewatch Supergirl from the very beginning. I needed something hopeful and uplifting, and a show about family and feminism and empathy was exactly what the doctor ordered.
I got completely caught up just in time to watch 2×06 last night. And then Supergirl broke me again, but in the best possible way.
I’ve seen a A LOT of coming out scenes on TV. Alex’s scenes reminded me of Paige and Santana and Willow, but it was so refreshing that she wasn’t in high school anymore. I’ve seen a LOT of coming out scenes, but none have every felt as real to me as Alex Danvers’. Whoever wrote it HAS to be queer, because there is no way they can get so many of the individual steps right if they haven’t been there themselves.
Like Alex, I also figured out I was gay because I fell in love with one girl. Like Alex, that girl was the first person I ever told. And like Alex, I got my heart fucking crushed. But even more than that, so many smaller things were so relatable – the way she danced around the words she couldn’t bring herself to utter out loud; the way she stared at her feet because she couldn’t even look Kara in the eye; the way she thinks back to everything in her past ans sees so many things in a new light (OMG Valerie you are SO RIGHT about that being such a universal thing!); so many parts of this episode just felt SO FUCKING REAL. I have never wanted to hug a fictional character as much as I wanted to leap through my screen and envelop Alex Danvers in the biggest bearhug of all time. I was literally watching the show and caressing her face on the screen.
As for Maggie, she absolutely did the right thing. But I’m confident that in an episode or two, (because this show moves through it’s plot pretty fast) she’s going to realize that she might have made a mistake. Maggie’s got feelings, for sure, but she’s hurting right now so she needs time, and Alex needs time to get her sea legs. Time is okay. Maggie basically just pulled an Arizona, and we all remember how only a few episodes later Arizona admitted that she’d called it wrong and asked Callie out. I’m not worried.
I’ve only been watching this show for a week, and it has been the worst fucking week ever, but this show has been the bright spot for me, and I am SO on board the Good Ship #Sanvers.
Excellent recap, you nailed it!
So far, this coming out story has been more similar to my experience than any other that I’ve seen. Feeling like you’re not built for relationships? Seeing memories in a new light? Wondering if your parents knew what the Liv Tyler pictures on your wall meant before you did?
I feel so wonderfully validated watching Alex’s story and I can’t wait to see more!
Poor Alex, she really did celebrate coming out by having All Of The Feels.
Also, I agree that the Guardian plot line is kinda stupid, but I highly enjoyed yelling NOW KISS at the screen whenever Winn and James smiled at each other.
If they actually put Winn and James together romantically, James would be instantly 20 times more interesting.
haha I totally agree! I worry that instead there’ll be a Clark Kent/Superman thing where Kara has feelings for Guardian but not James.
Oh god, please no! Mon-El is already too much hetero love interest time-suck on the show.
yuup. Let’s just hope that Winn and Lena keep their respective queer love interests too occupied for it to work
SO MANY FEELINGS…
Everything about this episode was perfect, even the heartbreaking moments. But I absolutely love how this is all being handled and I am really glad they aren’t doing an insta-relationship with Maggie and Alex. I assume it will happen eventually, and the wait will make it that much sweeter.
With the crossover episodes coming up, I wonder if Sara Lance and Alex will hook up. Is it a possibility?
My thoughts exactly!
It has been mentioned that Sara will have a crush on Supergirl but Kara being like ‘Hey you’re gay? So’s my sister and she’s having a hard time of it do you think you can talk to her?’ And Maggie seeing them and being jealous because how can she compete with a Superhero? Would be my dream!
A few comments below, someone mentioned that Alex won’t be in the crossover, so there goes that dream :( But I’m with you on the jealousy front. In a few episodes, maybe Alex will start dating someone and then Maggie will be the one who has to figure out what she really wants. I am so looking forward to seeing this story unfold!
Woah..I don’t watch the other shows, so my mind is blown. (I only heard about the lesbian death on Arrow from Autostraddle). Sara Lance must be the remaining lesbian and, wow, that seems like a possibility. Interesting…
I get confused with all the Arrowverse stuff (I don’t watch it either), but I’m pretty sure Sara Lance was killed off on Arrow, then resurrected for Legends of Tomorrow. Don’t quote me on this, though, I’m not an expert!
What. An. Amazing. Episode. I can’t even fault it for breaking my heart at the end, and I’m definitely not upset with Maggie. Seeing Alex break down in her apartment with Kara, and that SOB she let out made my heart ache for her.
BUT I think what Maggie did, in her own mind, was right. And I 100% absolutely took it as a “I don’t want to get into a relationship with you that’s destined to fail. I want something that’s going to last”. She definitely has feelings for Alex, and I think she wants to be with her … just not at this point in Alex’s journey.
Can I also be totally honest and say that Floriana Lima is just KILLING ME as Maggie Sawyer? I am crushing so hard on her right now, with the dimples, and the head-tilt. The last scene where she breaks Alex’s heart? I still want to see screen caps and rematch it because OMG her in that white shirt is everything!!
I’ve never seen anyone look so amazing while playing pool.
Another great recap! Thank you for this!
Alex coming out to Kara and talking about the memories from her childhood that came back to her and made her realize how long she has been feelings these feelings was spot on! I’ve been out for over a decade and I still have memories sometimes where I’m like “ohhhhhhh yea that makes sense now.”
I’m so grateful to the writers for this dialogue and to the actors for bringing it to life. So, so good!!
I mean I think we all knew that’s how Maggie would feel, but damn if that wasn’t the most painful rejection in the history of television. I don’t even blame her, I don’t blame anyone, it’s just an impossible situation. Everything Maggie said was true, but I can physically feel all the embarrassment Alex was feeling. I hid behind my napkin when they kissed because I just knew what was coming.
I felt so many things in like two seconds. When Alex grabbed her face I was excited, because lady kisses, but then I was like “shit it’s too soon!” And if Maggie didn’t say what she said it wouldn’t have felt true to the story, you know? But then she did say it and I felt everything Alex felt in that moment.
Oh Rao, I need a drink. I need whatever Kara was drinking.
THE. FEELS.
The majority of coming out scenes I’ve seen on tv has always made me cringe at least a little bit, or made me uncomfortable in a way or another.. but this.. this was perfect. And it DID made me feel kinda uncomfortable but just because it was TOO REAL, you know? It was almost too personal, in a way that feels amazing though. Both the writers and Chyler did a really great job.
And the ‘shoving some memories so deep inside that it’s like they never happened’ thing? TOO REAL. I guess it’s in this small things (that are actually really important) that we can see how vital it is to have queer people on the writing team. Because all this bottling up, being in denial, not realizing that you’re actually having a crush on a girl until years later, etc, it’s just so typical of the queer experience that I’m not sure someone who has never felt it on their skin can really understand.
I love everything you said about this episode and I agree 100%. I really liked your thoughts on where both Maggie and Alex are coming from. I hope their story continues to unfold and that whoever is writing the dialog between Kara/Alex and Alex/Maggie keeps up the fabulous work. I haven’t been this invested in a storyline in a while and like Maggie I’m gun shy (no pun) but I’m here for it all.
I nominate Sara Lance as Alex’s first queer hook up. That’s really the whole reason they’re doing a crossover, right?
Alex won’t be in the crossover.
What?!? But she missed the last crossover!
That’s why we have fanfic! :)
So we have Supergirl, but now we also have 3 main male characters who are also superheroes. James’ suit is LITERALLY shining armor. And this whole keeping it a secret thing really bothers me, cuz Kara told Winn right away. James once demanded she tell Lucy the truth. His whole deal used to be about honesty and loyalty. I really hope this isn’t some plan for him to try and “win her back” when she said it herself that she needs to figure herself out on her own.
This-season James seems so different than last-season James. :(
I was actually glad when he took over CatCo, cuz it just made sense, he did the job last season. But Cat managed to be a hero doing that job, idk why he can’t. (Also how does he have the time to do both?) And, apparently the Guardian is a real DC character, who’s alter ego is James Harper.
I know, I thought he was going to be around more, helping Kara out, not Supergirl. I dunno. I hope now that he has an alter-ego he’ll be happier and more exciting.
James insisted on Kara sharing her secret because Lucy thought he was maybe cheating on her and was mad that he wasn’t ready to share other private things like stories about his deceased father. Also, Lucy was getting ready to throw aliens into alien Guantanamo so she had to know why James was spending time with Supergirl. It was more than just a secret.
Yeah but his relationship wasn’t Kara’s problem to fix. And I know that wasn’t the reason she ended up telling Lucy, I just don’t think it was fair of him to ask Kara to do it in the first place.
Supergirl is doing a great job with Alex and Maggie, and I love the enthusiasm from fandom. But I really need the writers and fandom to be more cognizant of the way they write, and talk about, James Olsen (especially in comparison to Mon-El who he was basically tossed aside for, so Kara could have a white boy to focus on). Calling the only black character on the show, who is actually human (and not wearing blackness as a disguise), inconsequential is horrible. Also Mon-El is like the fictional personification of white male privilege, he has all of this power, but has to be begged and guilted into using it for good. I understand James is an imperfect character but come on, do better fandom.
I LOOOOOOVED James last season. I thought he was sweet and thoughtful and funny and kind. The writers need to do better with him this year. He DESERVES better.
I really liked James up until 1×16 when he pulled away from Kara because he didn’t know she had that kind of anger in her, because her brain was altered and she said mean things about his ex. It seemed really out of character for him, since they spent 1×06 bonding over finding a release for their anger. I think that’s where the writers started changing him.
And yeah, Mon-El was a useless addition to the show and he’s by far my least favorite character.
To the show’s credit, Snapper is played by a Puerto Rican and Lucy was played by a Syrian-Lebanese woman.
I’m sure you mean well here, but your comment reads like an attempt to change the subject. KFeels is talking about the mistreatment, in the show and in fandom, of black male character who is in the main cast. Despite that prominence, his character has been handled in racially suspect ways, especially in the tanking of his romance with a white woman.
Both the characters you mention are much more minor, only recurring and in comparatively few episodes—and are not only not black, but extremely light-skinned, and from backgrounds whose place on our racial spectrum is sometimes debated. (I know Puerto Rican and Lebanese people who identify as white, because that is how their family has been classified for generations, and there are complicated historic reasons why that is an option for them.)
But the show could have easily used this casting to expand the ethnic diversity of their characters, by having the characters casually reference their ethnicity or with classic TV shorthand like last names fitting their background or family members who are visibly of color.
Instead the show has done the opposite, following the usual Hollywood playbook of making characters played by multiracial or ethnically ambiguous actors white: WASPy last names, no reference to ethnicity, and in Lucy’s case a very white father. Let’s not forget that James’s entire dynamic with Lucy’s father was played as a racial one, with the white dad objecting to him as a potential match for his daughter in racially coded ways.
If Lois, when she eventually shows us, is played by an actress of Western Asian descent, we can talk, but in the meantime all signs are that the show is actively whitewashing those characters.
THANK YOU for this comment! I love this show, but it frustrates me to no end that I can’t read about the great lady-loving romance here without getting a lot of black character bashing.
And the fact that James was demoted from love interest after an entire season being spent on that plot is skeevy as hell. I liked his romance with Kara, and his own arc of trying to figure out how to relate to superheroes in a more grown up and less sidekick way. Even now I’m glad that he’s getting his own arc, even though it feels like a weak attempt to make up for scrapping the black man as love interest. (MB is doing his damnedest with a tough part.)
I don’t mind Mon-El in and of himself, but his dynamic with Kara feels like a sibling one, not romantic, and the whole Alien-Racism-Against-White-People plot drives me up a wall. It’s pouring salt on the wound.
James in not imperfect. He is perfect. That is the problem. Not relatable. And now no purpose.
Well, I get where Maggie is coming from. It’s the obvious way to react. But, if you ask me, it was also absolutely the wrong response, because
A) It’s Alex Danvers and she’s amazing, and
B) No other reason.
Maybe the relationship will have a better chance of success if it starts after Alex has got over her initial surge of enthusiasm and settled into a more calm, self-assured, non-Maggie-oriented-euphoria mindset (that’s not exactly it, but you know what I mean). Maybe that increase is even enough to make up for the reduced chance that Alex will be available long enough for that to happen, and still wanting to date Maggie despite the initial rejection, plus making up for the temporary heartbreak in the interim. Maybe even if Maggie doesn’t expect a chance to date Alex later, it might be better for Alex to have a first gay relationship not tied into the drama of coming out.
But… It’s Alex Danvers and she’s amazing. What were you thinking, Maggie?!
I haven’t seen this show yet but reading this reminded me a little of Ellen’s coming out episode too. But the reason Maggie gives is more complex than Laura Dern’s character Susan who was in a relationship she hadn’t mentioned. Very mature of the show to acknowledge how much of a rollercoaster coming out is and how hard it would be for a relationship to survive it.
In this very long week, I have been looking forward to two things: this episode and this recap. Neither disappointed.
To the writers of Supergirl – thank you for portraying a woman who is falling for another woman as a real person, not a caricature or a punchline. Also, thank you for including the very real issue of global warming…seriously not a hoax. It’s a thing.
Valerie Anne, thanks for summing it up again – so beautifully.
I am very OK with their constant message of “WE ARE DESTROYING THE ENVIRONMENT” although (as a global change biologist), I’d be even happier if the environmental activists weren’t *always* environmental terrorists….
Thank you for reading! <3
So many feelings… I relate to the storyline, even though i have identified as bisexual, and later queer since i was like 16, still. The first girl love of my life says it was just an experiment (that took a year….) And till this day i feel confused about who i am sometimes, and the ‘what does it matter if i’m queer if nobody loves me anyways’ that i felt that Alex was channeling at that moment. It was raw , painful but also beautiful.
I also didnt feel like Maggie didnt like Alex, but more that she was hesitant and she did have her heart just crushed too. I hope they eventually will at least try together. please supergirl DO NOT kill maggie now. i will hate you forever if you do
Wow. Just wow. Look, up in the sky, it’s Supergirl here to save us. I remember when I watched the first trailer and all I could think was “okay, looks really, really cheesy”. And now it’s my new favorite show (well, one of them, but definitely my favorite out of the ones currently on).
I don’t need to tell anyone how real this episode felt, everyone knows that, but boy did it feel real.
I think what I love most about this show is that it doesn’t apologize for what it is. It doesn’t try to walk some sort of middle line to not alienate its potential cis, straight, male audience. It’s queer, it’s feminist, it’s progressive in every way and it’s PROUD of it. It flaunts it. It lives and breathes it. It also doesn’t hurt that it’s just genuinely fun and lighthearted in the best way. Don’t get me wrong I do love me some dark and gritty queer shows like Orphan Black but this fills a hole in my heart that no other show ever has in quite this way. Watching this is really and truly liberating, empowering and uplifting and even putting the election aside for a moment, after the year we’ve had on TV it really feels like Supergirl swooped in from the skies, completely out of nowhere and saved us. Thank you Supergirl :) Never go away, please! Now excuse me while I go have feels in the corner ;)
Nice recap. Didn’t think the show was going to go in a queer direction but I am glad it has. I look foward to reading more. It sucks getting rejected though. Right in the feels. At least she didn’t do what I did and treat her first love like shit and then admit feelings. That friendship took forever to repair.
The subaru ads I’m getting on the CW website have shown up at a suspicious time…
I kind of like the Guardian arch because Guardian really is a DC character (although he’s supposed to be James Harper not James Olsen) and James needs something to do. He is being whiny and moody, but Lucy just broke up with him and Kara is too busy to date anyone. I look forward to funny bromance scenes between James and Winn.
PS – I’m unhappy that Lena wasn’t in this episode.
I was actually glad for the break I think my heart might have EXPLODED???
i hated what they’ve done to james. like, suddenly kara goes from super interested to let’s just be friends and then he kinda just gets shoved off to the corner. and then gets all whiny. last episode when winn was talking about being intelligence, and that being just a different kind of superhero, i really thought they were going to hammer that home, and then they just… didn’t. i dunno. i miss first season james, and i wish he’d come back and the guardian can take mon-el to a different show that cares about them (can i also just complain for a second about how kara’s relationship with mon-el is the perfect example of women being forced to do fucktons of emotional labor for men to make them “better.” so frustrating).
anyway, alex. oh, alex. i totally agree with everything you’ve said (though i’ve been gender non-conforming my whole life so i don’t think i can relate to feelings of revelations. like, me and everyone around me always pretty much knew, whether they accepted it or not), but i also think, like, it’s not just coming out. alex is a control freak. like, she probably needs a plan, a contingency plan, and backup to eat lunch. and she had a connection with maggie, and they were vibing, and maggie was flirting and told her that if she came out, she’d buy her a drink. and i think alex thought that was a date invitation, honestly. and she came out only when she was so. sure. that maggie was into her.
i think a big part of her feeling humiliated and heartbroken was that she’d taken a leap and made herself vulnerable-not necessarily because it was with a woman for the first time, but because she had convinced herself it wasn’t going to happen. alex is not a vulnerable person. she rationalizes her feelings most of the time. while kara can very clearly talk about her emotions, alex tends to talk around them. she talks about concrete things like people and situations and the past without exactly naming what’s going on inside of her.
i dunno, i’m not trying to be critical because i think this was a beautiful recap and i love everything you’ve written about this show so far, but i worry we’re essentialising the coming out experience, making it take prime importance in what’s going on for her. and again, i may have had a different experience from a lot of people, but at the end of the day, i still relate to that feeling and i’ve been out for a decade.
also, end of this absurdly long comment: i loved how kara was unconditionally accepting, yet she still fucked up when alex came out. i feel like there’s a lot of melodrama in people’s coming out story. someone says something blatantly homophobic and then eventually comes around or whatnot, or people hug them and totally accept them. but kara’s reaction here was so realistic. sort of confused, asking all the wrong questions that make it seem like she’s not being supportive, even when she is. asking totally common questions that just hit exactly the wrong spot for alex. i think that’s super lovely for folks to see, because they get to see from the outside how ignorant it sounds and how hurtful it can be.
Yeah, I was hoping after Winn’s speech that James’ story would be learning to be a hero by telling stories that give people hope, like how Cat was a hero in that job. I like him as the head of the company, I guess I wished they would’ve leaned on that plot more.
As for mon el he can get right back in that pod and fly back to his desolate home planet, because his character is completely unnecessary and takes up all of Kara’s storyline.
I am Alex in almost every way and I cannot tell you how amazing and painful it is to watch my life nearly play out in front of me the way it has with her storyline. I was/am a perfectionist and as a kid I strove to be the absolutely best kid my parents could have ever asked for (I’m the middle of 7). I never drank, smoked, or did drugs; went to church regularly, straight A student, etc. I dated guys but never cared for it. I resolved that I was asexual and was okay with that because it was a real thing. Throughout my younger years, college and grad school, I didn’t have any close friends that were girls and in fact avoided them because they were “too much drama”. When I started to realize I might be gay at the tender age of 26, I began to understand that I didn’t have girls as friends because some part of me knew.
There was a lesbian who worked in the same building I did and as I began to come out to myself I purposefully started a friendship with her (without telling here I was questioning) because I knew no gay people personally and was too afraid to go to a lesbian club or event. Lo and behold, I fall for her and my asexual diagnosis flew out the window. I both came out to her and confessed how I felt at the same time. She rejected me gently but I was devastated partially for the reasons Valerie Anne mentioned in the recap but also because I thought I’d been doing life so right, then I found out there was this gaping hole. Now it was starting to fill and somewhere I guessed wrong and failed. I’d never failed at anything I’d set my mind to and I didn’t want to be gay if it meant I was going to be so absolutely wrong. At least when I was “straight” my loses didn’t feel like failures, just practice tests that I barely studied for or cared about because they didn’t count. Sounds almost petulant but its true.
I so look forward to seeing this play out and sitting in front of my tv slack jawed in disbelief at the parallels to my own life. Btw…Chyler Leigh is absolutely slaying it.
Alex coming out is the best storyline on this show. It’s so beautiful and real and amazing. Her scene with Kara at the end was the best. I relate to Alex so much and this show is absolutely the best! :) Thank you for all your amazing recaps and putting all the feels into words.
<3
OMG! Chyler just published a podcast she did with Floriana and I
can’t.
http://charitypulse.com/10-4-10-floriana-lima/
Loving this storyline, great recap. And, “Bad Lesbian Movie Brunch”? Yes, please!
I went to a Bad Lesbian Movie Brunch on Sunday and it was so soul-healing, I had to spread the love!
This episode was so great. This show is so great. Your recaps are great. Chyler Leigh was amazing, and I’m so glad we have her character on tv right now.
I haven’t had a character that was my fave turn out to be queer since Willow, which was how I came out to myself, so I’m thrilled to all of those who will see themselves in Alex.
Thank all that is good in this world for this episode.
And with that I am going to drink a beer in bed while watching it again.
My Maggie story involves my writing gushy love poetry in a sealed envelope and that placing envelope poem in a locked journal, giving it to the person who made me really face how queer I was, and then sending her the key via mail, then following up with an email, because I have no chill.
And then getting drunk on a night that I thought I was losing my job and messaging her I had feels after she told me she had feels for someone else. Because I’m cool like that.
She responded with something like: “I know.”
We stayed friends throughout it all while my heart got crushed into smaller and smaller compact boxes and now, many years later, are excellent non-complicated friends. Because queermos.
tl;dr: this storyline is pretty much the only thing keeping my heart from taking an off-Earth vacation for the next 4 years. Kudos, all involved.
Valerie first, your words inspire me and second, thank you for sharing just a little bit of your personal experiences with us.
I will get to all the Sanvers stuff to but I really have to get the annoyance I have for James off my chest. Actually from now on I’m not even calling him James anymore, it will be Jimmy from now on.
I was a huge Lois and Clark fan and let me reiterate that it annoys me they made Jimmy into this hunky guy who now wants to be a crime fighter and Clark looks like the dorky side kick. On Lois and Clark they recast Jimmy because the guy who played him in season one resembled Dean Cain too much and they were like we can’t have Jimmy also be able to get the girl or something like that (it was like 20 years ago).
***Side note fun fact Lois Lane was Teri Hatcher who was on Desperate Housewives with Brenda Strong who is on Supergirl as the Cadmus Lady (does she have a name yet?)
Okay back to my hating Jimmy, if some of you followed on twitter I went into a bit of a rant as to why it is illogical for Jimmy to be Guardian (stupid, stupid name) but there is only so much you can do with 140 characters so here goes again…
1-Jimmy was raging at Winn that he needed to get out there and help after Supergirl “NEARLY DIED” but failed to realized that Supergirl has super powers and she got beat down, Jimmy has 0 powers, how long would he last?
2-Jimmy needs Winn in the van to help him but what if the alien or whatever they are fighting smashes the van like the 2 or 3 other cars that got thrown and smashed during that fight?
3-Clever the suit is made of Iron so Supergirl can’t x-ray it and see what a moron Jimmy is but Iron is heavy and it is very difficult to move in let alone fight in. The movie A Knight’s Tale lays that out.
4-So Jimmy was wearing an IRON helmet, how did he get a cut/bump on his forehead unless from the helmet itself aside from the fact wouldn’t Kara start noticing the bumps and bruises on you after a night fighting along side Guardian?
5-Oh but the kicker is that you tell Winn you have to keep this under wraps but the next day your reporting about your heroics on EVERY single media outlet, who else would’ve have told people about you, the streets emptied after the monster showed up. And even if Kara came into the office and was like “Jimmy, there’s this new hero we have to report on him” you could’ve said no.
Okay I’m done ranting on Jimmy, now onto Sanvers. Actually no not Sanvers but more Alex and Kara. I know they are sisters but their “it’s okay”, “it’s obviously not okay since you won’t look at me” back and forth was very reminiscent of Jessie and Katie from Once and Again.
Now Sanvers, I said it a few reviews back that Alex was around 30 and that it was really nice to see them play it with women that age as opposed to high school or college girls or even someone middle aged discovering their feelings for a girl.
My words would not do Chyler’s performance justice as Valerie’s words did but a sign of a good performance and powerful words, faces, pauses even is when you want to reach through and hug the person as your heart breaks for them.
Maggie too, it was hard for her to take a step back. Even though Arizona said something similar to Callie it was in the delivery that made it that much more heart wrenching. Truth is it could be a number of reasons for Maggie, we don’t really know much about her yet to know why she did what she did. It could even be that her break up is still too fresh for her and she would be no good to Alex at the moment. crack your heart now so I don’t shatter it later.
Finally though, On the one hand, slow burn good, we’ve been lucky with some recent slow burns with big pay offs. and Maggie is still new they don’t need to hook them up right off the bat but then and I hate to say this, but nothing is guaranteed yet with this show and I would hate for TPTB to wait too long that they pull a Shonda Rhimes and the couple/show doesn’t get to the finish line. I’ll give them the benefit of the doubt though, I mean what’s next episode 7, maybe Maggie and Kara/Supergirl hang out, get drunk, someone mentions a top shelf ass and they get kidnapped together (or so I’ve heard can happen in episode 7’s) then I’ll give them until episode 9 maybe (tee hee).
@Cyclone, I’m glad someone shares my annoyance with Jimmy. In addition to the questions that you’ve laid out: how is it that a photographer who was just given the keys to a media conglomerate has so much free time? Cat Grant didn’t have time to spend with her kid but Jimmy takes over a job he’s woefully under-qualified for and he can manage it AND saving the world?
Absurd.
And thank you for referencing A Knight’s Tale, my top-two favourite movie of all time.
I have caught the feels. It’s like this is too much, too real and at the same time I’m hungry for more.
I may or may not have spent the episodes repeating ‘I do not cry at tv shows’ while tearing up.
Everyone needs a Maggie Sawyer when they’re coming out, boy do I wish I had one.
These are probably too many comments so forgive me but I watched in awe as Alex went in for the girl because I never did because she was so painfully straight and I didn’t want to wreck a good thing. It took me a good four years to get over her. Alex makes me wish I had been this brave. Maybe next time.
Thank you Valerie. I needed this.
Thank YOU for reading. <3
Omg ALEX CAME TO NORWAY !! (Hahha that northern light tho. Haha)
Alex comes to the bar searching for Maggie and then catches sight of her head beside the pool table. The emotions she went through, even it was brief, was fantastic to watch and just brought an inadvertent smile to my face!
Her face when that kiss did not end up as what she probably expected…..
Chyler Leigh- Where was this woman all this time (except Grey’s Anatomy?) She’s just, brilliant, brilliant!
While I wanted Maggie to be eager with Alex, I liked that they did not jump into it right away. That it looks like a slow burn (hoping that this doesn’t disappoint), the writers wrote it very well. Just keeping my fingers crossed for them to continue and better their writing of the dynamics of these two.
James-Ugh, whiny, whiny arse, who thinks too much of himself. Of course he thinks himself as a Guardian, even jealous that Kara is getting all the adulation. Can’t stand him. Why can’t men side-kicks stay that way in ‘Girl Hero’ Series or Movies? The opposite is true in most of the ‘Men Hero’ series or Movies…
Every good lesbian story has a feelings bench :-) :-) Valerie, a great review!
Everything about supergirl right now just speaks to me. It shows how important it is to have members of our community writing about our stories. There’s a truth they speak to it that touches all of us. Alex is going through so much and she’s sad but this is the realest storyline I’ve seen on American Telly, and I’m so happy for it.
Chyler Leigh knocked it out of the goddamn park. Hell, she knocked it out of the planet! Every facial expression, every nervous tick, every defensive and defeated pose, and oh dear god, that sob at the very end of the episode was beyond perfect. There are not enough words to describe how perfect she was in every scene. This was possibly one of the best portrayals of a coming out I’ve ever seen on television. It was so raw and real and utterly devastating. Watching Alex stumble through the gauntlet of her emotions and realizations, going from happy and amused at seeing a drunk Kara, the fluttering of butterflies when she saw Maggie, to her nervousness and panic and then running away after she told Kara, to pain and sadness when she thought Kara was not okay with it, to sheer utter relief when Kara held her so tightly and was unflinchingly supportive, to running high on the relief only to crash into the waters of rejection and devastation when Maggie was truthful to her…I was emotionally and mentally exhausted just watching her go through it.
I mean I kinda sensed that it was not going to be all ponies and daffodils between Alex and Maggie so soon after Alex’s realization but damn Maggie’s rejection still stung like the Dickens. The way Alex’s face crumpled and then the scene that followed with Kara…it was almost too much. Thank you though to whoever wrote Alex’s coming out journey with such precision and care. From this review and the comments, it’s clear that it resonated with a lot of people because it was real and true and it hurt like hell. I’m looking forward to the future episodes to see how Alex deals with the repercussions of Maggie’s rejection and how she explores being out of the closet.
P.S. – Maggie’s white shirt. Honestly, could that be any gayer? Lol. Also, drunk!Kara was HYSTERICAL. I want to see more!
As a queer climate scientist who digs up permafrost in the arctic tundra and whose best friend is my sister and who relates very strongly to Alex’s narrative…. I had so so so many feelings about this episode. (Also can we stick Rudy on Myron Ebell??)
LOVE THIS! Queer climate science ftw! (well global change conservation biologist here, but overlapping interests!)
I loved this recap/personal essay! Thank you for your words.
Thank YOU for yours! It means a lot.
This show is a pleasant surprise, doing the ‘coming out’ stuff all right in my book. Wentworth killed me, Supergirl thrilled me.
Ok this is my first comment on this, and I’m really shy but I feel I really need to say something. Forgive my rambling.
As others have said, Alex’s story is also my story… And it’s the most wonderful, fabulously real portrayal I have ever seen on a TV show.
I discovered my queerness at the age of 28 when I realised I wanted to start dating women. I was terrified and excited by my self discovery but mostly terrified at the thought of the big change it would bring to my life. I had barely gone out with a couple of guys before in my teens, what if this wasn’t real? However, after a few dates, I met the most amazing woman who I fell really hard for and then I knew I couldn’t hide it any more. So at the age of 29 I came out to my family exactly as Alex did to her sister, I stumbled and skirted around the words I wanted to say, I spoke about the woman I had met instead of saying the word gay, I didn’t and couldn’t describe myself as that, not for several years, in fact.
Then after it all she friend-zoned me for exactly the same reasons Maggie did to Alex. She had only recently come out of a relationship that affected her greatly and I was a baby dyke so it was all too shiny and new to be long-lasting. I was devastated. However we did get to know each other better as friends and a couple of months later her feelings changed and we shared our first kiss and it was amazing and perfect and everything I had hoped it would be. Now we’ve just celebrated our eighth wedding anniversary in September and I can’t imagine being anywhere else but here.
Alex had always been my favourite character on Supergirl from the pilot episode so when I discovered she was to go on the same journey I had I was excited for her too. And now to actually see the writers and cast and crew treat Alex’s coming out story with such respect and compassion makes me love this show even more. I really like that this badass character who can put you down with a swift kick to the face, doesn’t really know what she’s doing when it comes to this side of her life and is trying her best to make sense of it all. And I like that it’s messy and imperfect and angsty with no immediate happy endings because that’s life. I know Alex will come through it at the other side and we will all be right there with her.
Kara is amazeballs as well and I love the Danvers sisters relationship above all. More scenes with them together please.
A couple of other observations, I’m really liking Winn this year in his support role at the DEO, especially his new friendship with Alex and the way he’s standing up to James. And the comedy side to him is brilliant. I really feel like James is acting way out of character this year. He suddenly wants to be a hero in a tin suit after his camera was destroyed, when he was such the voice of reason in season one. I’m not buying it. And I’m not sure if I like Mon-el or not at this point. It seems like all the guys on this show have to have superpowers?
Finally to you, Valerie, I first read your work on After Ellen and followed you here to Autostraddle. Thank you for the amazing recaps and I should mention that you also introduced me to Wynonna Earp for which I am eternally grateful.
YOUR SANVERS-ESQUE LOVE STORY WAS SO BEAUTIFUL. Congrats on your anniversary!!!
And thank you for your kind words. I’m glad you followed me over and are enjoying it here. And I’m so glad I helped you find the gift that is Wynonna Earp!!!
I’ve got some possible bad news, so I’ll put it in the reply in case you don’t want to see it.
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It looks like they may be going ahead with forcing a Kara/Mon-El romance. Here’s a part of the synopsis for the “Supergirl” Invasion crossover episode: “Kara (Melisa Benoist) is shocked when Eliza suggests Mon-El (Chris Wood) has feelings for her…”
I watched this episode with tears rolling down my face. It was so perfect.
I loved the way Kara apologized to Alex when she realized she hadn’t done a good enough job listening to her as she came out. I remember when I told my sister, afterwards she was like “Was that ok? Did I do all right?” She was really concerned she hadn’t done a good enough job being there for me. The more I think of it, the more I realize our dynamic is really similar to Kara and Alex’s.
I’m also really interested to see where they go with Alex and Maggie. As a 32 year old who is working her way through coming out, my biggest fear is that nobody will want to date me since I’m so late to the party. So, I’m pretty curious to see if Alex does end up with Maggie after a couple episodes of making us wait, or if she forces herself to get out there and try to date.
I think you’ll still find plenty of queer women willing to date newbies. You shouldn’t worry.
Also, every out queer woman will have had different experiences with dating and relationships. Although I’ve been out for 10 years and I feel incredibly confident in my identity, I still feel sometimes like a newbie myself because I’ve only ever been with one woman (am still with her because she’s the smartest, most beautifully complex person!). But if I ever were to date again, I would definitely not mind my dates being “inexperienced”, seeing I won’t really consider myself “experienced”. In any case, I would never think less of someone who is “just fresh of the boat”, even if she’s 30 or 40, if I really like the person, all this wouldn’t matter. Plus, everyone is different, and in every relationship, you have to adjust and re-learn a lot of things anyway.
On another topic, I, too, relate very strongly to the Danvers sisterly bond. I kind of have the same guarded personality as Alex while my baby sister is this bright, open, sociable, lovable person. I’ve also always felt very protective of her. When I came out to her, she was the most supportive, as I knew she would be. Of course, two years later SHE came out to ME haha…
Hi Vicki! Just a quick fyi, I came out at 28 and was also really worried, but being ‘new’ was never an issue for the people I dated. I didn’t specify that I was newly out in my OKC profile but when it came up in the course of conversation it was always a non-issue, thankfully.
Vicki, I honestly think part of the reason Maggie was hesitant to start something with Alex so quickly was that she herself was just out of a relationship, and also because she didn’t want to ruin their already-established friendship. So even though she stated the reason being that she was fresh out of the closet, there are more underlying factors. There are plenty of people out there who would have no problem dating someone who is recently out! Plus, Alex came out and kissed Maggie all in the same day, only a few days after realizing it herself. So you’re already miles beyond where Alex is! Even Maggie would date you now! :)
I sense a new girl coming into Alex’s life in the near future.
Kate Kane would be nice.
Since they seemed to make a point of telling us the name of Alex’s high school best friend – first AND last name, first name repeated twice – I’m thinking we might see her. Like Alex decides to look her up to apologize for and explain why she pushed her away back then, or Kara decides the best way to help Alex heal from Maggie’s rejection is to bring in the one other woman she knows Alex has been interested in. It seems like the sort of naive well-meaning scheme Kara would come up with.
I don’t want Kate Kane because she’d end up with Maggie. Alex already feels humiliated by Maggie’s rejection; I can’t imagine how much further humiliated she’d feel to then lose a woman she’s interested in to Maggie.
Does anyone else need the SuperCorp train like me???? Well it inspired me to write my first ever fanfic. VERY NSFW.
Cross-Shock (4232 words) by adventurewriterChapters: 1/1Fandom: Supergirl (TV 2015)Rating: ExplicitWarnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive WarningsRelationships: Kara Danvers/Lena Luthor, Kara Danvers & Lena Luthor, kara/lenaCharacters: Kara Danvers, Lena Luthor, Alex DanversAdditional Tags: SuperCorp, Supercorp Trash, Smut, sin – Freeform, Kink, I am supercorp trash, CrossfireSummary: Lena pursues and seduces Kara, at the office, at her loft, and at a gala. But Kara offers so much more…
Filling in the promising blanks of the S2E5 “Crossfire” blanks with Kara/Lena smut. Hot, heavy, and a little kinky. Fully onboard for the Supercorp ship, with no fillers and no boys.
Be nice, it’s my first ever fiction!
I’m overwhelmed by Alex’s storyline, super happy!
Also, did you guys notice Nikolh Boosheri from Circumstance?!
when she said that she was almost 30 and felt like a kid again, I was like, ya, same here. I’m FAR too giddy about this e n t i r e thing but it’s one of a few things bringing me joy right now, so I accept.
Before this episode (and all these comments) I honestly didn’t know that avoiding a baby gay on purpose was a thing. I’m feeling really lucky right now that my wife gave me a shot almost 11 yrs ago even though I was mostly closeted and had never even kissed a girl before. I knew myself well but school and med school and internship etc gave me enough to do to be able to hide. Wow. So thankful.
So many feels! This episode was unusually hard for me because I normally look at plot developments on a meta level and so I can be somewhat detached. To wit, Maggie breaking Alex’s heart – I understand that it’s actually a GREAT sign that the writers are taking this entire storyline seriously and plan to do it right. They see that the romance needs to be a slow burn instead of one of those lightning-quick things that usually are the f/f storylines on TV, and they also want to underline that Alex is a lesbian. She had that realization because she met Maggie, but she’s a lesbian whether she’s with Maggie or not – this isn’t something where if Floriana Lima leaves the show Alex will just go be with a guy. So normally I would just be totally happy with how everything went in this episode, pump my fist, and move on.
But I couldn’t do that while watching this, or the many times I’ve rewatched this. Because I love Alex, I absolutely love her, and I hate seeing her in pain. I’ve watched other characters I love be in pain before, and been totally okay with it because on the meta level it means good things. But for whatever reason, I can’t detach myself from Alex.
I do fault Maggie in one thing: The reason she caught on to Alex being gay in the first place was because Alex was so obviously crushing on her. Maggie has a policy about not being with a first-timer, which, fine. I didn’t have a problem with her telling Alex no, but I did have a problem with how she acted with Alex leading up to that. She wasn’t just acting like a friend, she was being flirty. If she hadn’t had any idea that Alex was attracted to her until Alex kissed her, that would have been one thing, but she did have some idea, that’s how she realized Alex is gay in the first place. Alex had reason to think the answer she got from Maggie would be a yes. And of course Maggie’s not obligated, but if I’d been her, I would’ve drawn that line much sooner instead of waiting until the girl outright hit on me and THEN drawing the line.
And that does give me pause about Maggie, because we found out in the previous episode that her ex-girlfriend is not a fan. People have bad breakups, but “sociopath” is a harsh word to toss out. Not that I think Maggie will turn out to be a true sociopath; she’s a canon DC character who fights on the side of good, not a villain. But, to quote Alex’s line that she’s had twice in two seasons, there’s some truth to what the ex said. Maggie IS kind of insensitive. She was careless with Alex’s feelings leading up to that final scene between them, and Alex consequently got hurt more than she otherwise would have been.
Sooooooo…I still want to see Maggie and Alex get together (and I’m sure that’ll happen). But I have very specific ideas about exactly the way I want that to happen, now. I want to see Alex date around now, get a few hot women, bed at least one of them. I don’t want her to make any further advancements towards Maggie or keep acting lovesick around her; when the time comes, I want Maggie to have to chase her. Not just flash a flirty smile – Alex already saw enough of those and they turned out not to mean anything – and have Alex fall right into her arms.
And I want Kara to be kind of cold to Maggie when they first meet – Maggie’s met Supergirl, but not Kara. (Actually, come to think of it, that would be an interesting way for Maggie to realize that Kara is Supergirl, if Supergirl turns cold to Maggie and then Kara acts cold to Maggie.) Maggie hurt Kara’s precious sister, made her cry in a way that Kara’s probably not seen since her dad died, and Kara’s not the type to have a rational response to that. It wouldn’t surprise me if it takes Maggie longer to win Kara over than Alex. Alex has feelings and attraction to Maggie to help sway her, but Kara only cares about Alex.
Sheesh, I sound like a Sanvers hater, and I’m not. I want to see them together…I just want Maggie to have to work for it. This is such a great storyline!
Black Knight, I agree with most everything you said about Maggie. I’ve been rewatching the episode and watching reaction videos on youtube everyday since E6 aired. As a lot of people have already said, Alex’s coming out storyline for me, is the best I’ve ever seen on TV. That being said, I haven’t seen too much criticism about Maggie. I have reservations about Maggie because of what she said her ex said. I know the show isn’t about her but that relationship seems bizarre because it seems like Maggie thought this woman was really special and the woman thinks Maggie is a sociopath. I mean, that’s a serious word to throw around. If someone said that to me, my feelings would be really hurt.
As far as Maggie flirting with Alex, sometimes people are just flirts and I can see how a lesbian flirting with a straight girl could just be seen as fun and harmless. Because they were/are getting to know each other, this could just be how Maggie is with women she doesn’t think of dating or women she doesn’t like that way.
Like, I used to be a friendly flirt with everyone but the person I liked. Just sharing another viewpoint.
I would like to see Alex maybe date Lena. It would be cool if Maggie and Alex are good friends for awhile before they date, if they ever date.
I don’t agree that a “baby gay” needs to go out there and sow her oats. Some folks aren’t built that way. I do think because Maggie just suffered through a breakup that emotionally she is not ready to date and especially dealing with a newly out person who is super infatuated with her. That would be intimidating. I’d be thinking, “it won’t work out. I’ll lose my friend.” I think Maggie really cares about Alex and can be a better friend to her now than a lover or romantic partner. Plus, it will be great to see a jealous Maggie if it turns out Alex moves on.
I kind of think what happened with Maggie is that she took a hit to her ego after her ex dumped her (and called her a sociopath in the process, which as you said is extremely hurtful), so she was content to let Alex’s crush on her continue as long as Alex didn’t take it to a point where Maggie had to address it one way or another. Not the nicest thing to do, but hey, she could’ve done much worse – like sleep with Alex first and then hit her with a “let’s just friends” speech.
I agreed with everything Alex said to her in the next episode, and I was happy Alex got to say it because it needed to be said and Maggie needed to hear it. The ex was clearly not totally wrong – Maggie’s not a sociopath, but she is insensitive. So Alex will be very good for her, because Alex isn’t the type to let that slide for long.
And yes, I would not mind Alex having a fling with Lena. I do want Maggie and Alex together, but it seems pretty obvious that the show is going to do a storyline where Alex gets involved with someone else and Maggie gets jealous. I’m all for Lena being the interim fling, not just because Lena’s hot, but because Kara’s reaction would be hilarious.
I agree with you about baby gays not always needing to sow their oats – especially when it’s a woman who’s past her teens/early twenties, as Alex is, or when it’s someone who is just kind of a really serious person in general, again as Alex is. Some people really enjoy casually dating constantly, all varieties of people, and some people are just not into that at all – it’s a serious relationship or nothing, because they don’t like spending time and energy on something that’s not serious. I think Maggie’s projecting onto Alex there, because Maggie certainly seems like the type who, when she first started seeing girls/women (not sure when she started), wanted to date around and not get tied down to someone early. I don’t think Alex cares about that kind of thing at all. Her issue, once she gets into a relationship, will probably be more about how to make enough space for the relationship given her commitments to Kara and the DEO.
I’m looking forward to the crossover when Alex meets Sarah Lance. MAKE IT HAPPEN CW!
Every good lesbian story has a Feelings Bench. Bahaha.
Oh, coming out without actually saying the words, that scene felt almost too real. My family has been laughing (in a nice way) about the complicated phrasing I used in my coming out, something to the effect of “I should tell you something, I’m single, and I have been single for a long time, and I believe I will stay single, but if I don’t remain single it is quite possible that I won’t be with a man”.
The word ‘lesbian’ is such a difficult word to get comfortable with though…
This episode was painful to watch, but in the best way.
What a great review, Thanks. I’ve really missed AfterEllen.
First off, I am so glad they moved on from the James/Kara romance idea. I was ready to stop watching the show when I saw yet another bad-ass woman pining over a guy, I can barely watch Blindspot w/o getting sick. Supergirl doesn’t need to be a lesbian but she does need to rise above the I’m lovesick over a moron trope.
Secondly, I could be wrong but it seemed to me that for James it was more the adulation of being a hero than it was about being an actual hero. There was no humility and tons of self congratulation.
Third. As much as I would love to see Supergirl/Lena, I know it will likely never happen because of the potential loss of the straight fan viewership. We can’t have too many lesbians on one show as it might normalize us. Cynical I know.
Forth. I congratulate the writers on what was one of the best coming out stories thus far. It was touching and true to life. The actors did themselves proud.
For those of us still recovering from the bs death of Root, let us not give up hope, surely they can’t kill us all off.
“And then she talks about the truest thing, something that every single queer person I have ever talked to has been able to relate to: She’s seeing certain things from her past in a new light.”
Gah.. that was so on-point I got hit with the feels all over again. Your recaps are awesome, as always.
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