Rosie O’Donnell Told Ivanka Trump About Her Feelings, Wrote A Transcendent Poem About It

Listen I could talk to you all day about Donald Trump’s obsession with Rosie O’Donnell and his everything-phobic dismissal of her basic humanity and his enduring conviction that everybody finds her as deserving of mockery as he does… but I’ll spare you. Mostly because I already have talked to you about this: the first time was in 2010, the most recent time was a year ago after the Republican debate where Donald Trump once again used Rosie as a punchline. I said it then and I’ll say it again — she is not a perfect person, she has said and done things that are not okay — but there’s also a lot I love about Rosie, she’s been awesome to me every time I’ve seen her, and also I have loved Rosie for so long. (I still have the ticket stub from when she played Rizzo in the touring company of Grease, okay?) I’ve always appreciated how vulnerable she makes herself in order to help others, particularly when it comes to being open about her struggles with depression, which is one of the many things she does in a poem she published on her website yesterday after meeting Ivanka Trump.

“Rosie O’Donnell Wrote a Poem About Meeting Ivanka Trump and It Honestly Deserves a Pulitzer,” was Claire Landsbaum’s headline for a piece about this piece at The Cut. Readers: I think you will agree with Claire.

Before you stick your sporks into the loin and muscle of this fantastic work of art, entitled “8 Million to One,” can we take a moment for the opening graf that has no real bearing on the remainder of the piece?

i saw 4 cops – security i thought
well dressed
jovial – handsome – “yo rosie”
“wasssup men” my common reply

I hope you all just wrote “add ‘wasssup men’ to my everyday vocabulary” in the goals section of your Passion Planner.

Anyhow: Rosie then reveals that she’s been wrapped up like a burrito in bed since the debate, struggling to accomplish basic tasks because depression is a beast like that. But she managed to make it out of the house for dinner at Nobu, where Ivanka Trump happened to also be dining.

dear god
i prayed
guide me
out of here

Rosie is mesmerized by Ivanka’s beauty. And then they meet.

i told her of my children
some truths about myself
my pain and shame
she was absurdly kind

“i just wanted u to know”
i said in a shaky quiet voice
i then made my way down the large wooden stairway
into my waiting car

Okay, now go read the whole thing from top to bottom. Warning: the ending might punch you in the heart.

Riese is the 37-year-old CEO, CFO and Editor-in-Chief of Autostraddle.com as well as an award-winning writer, blogger, fictionist, copywriter, video-maker, low-key Jewish power lesbian and aspiring cyber-performance artist who grew up in Michigan, lost her mind in New York and then headed West. Her work has appeared in nine books including "The Bigger the Better The Tighter The Sweater: 21 Funny Women on Beauty, Body Image & Other Hazards Of Being Female," magazines including Marie Claire and Curve, and all over the web including Nylon, Queerty, Nerve, Bitch, Emily Books and Jezebel. She had a very popular personal blog once upon a time, and then she recapped The L Word, and then she had the idea to make this place, and now here we all are! In 2016, she was nominated for a GLAAD Award for Outstanding Digital Journalism. Follow her on twitter and instagram.

Riese has written 2753 articles for us.

13 Comments

  1. No lies, I thought you said “Now go read the whole thing bottom to top”… which I did, (about a dozen and a half times- I even used different methods- backwards by word, line, stanza. yeah I committed to this).

    FYI: this poem, no matter how you read it, does not go backwards.

  2. Rosssiiieeee! FUCK TRUMP you are so beautiful and brave for posting this. Depression sucks <3
    Riese, thanks for that link to your old article about Maddow. I used to have long hair that went down to the middle of my back and I cut it all off last year and my Dad brought back the mean nickname of "Erica's little brother, Eric" from when I cut my hair that short the first time in 4th grade. It's not like my Mom and her sister have short hair, his sister has short hair, LOTS OF PEOPLE HAVE SHORT HAIR. He has to make fun of me because I look like "a boy." Well, fuck you old man, I'm going to look like whatever I want.

  3. Speaking of Rosie, I was listening to NPR this morning, and they were doing a segment on Republican voters. A lady in her mid-sixties was interviewed, and one of the questions were along the lines of has Trump ever said anything that you just can’t get on board with, like building the wall, chasing out the Muslims, or calling out Rosie O’Donnell during the presidential debate? Her response was a chuckle, followed by the comment “I do think Rosie is a pig. She does deserve everything that comes at her.”

    I was floored. Since when, does any woman/human, DESERVE disrespectful jabs on such a large scale? I think having heard that interview this morning gave me a little more perspective into Rosie’s poem. The amount of support Trump has, doesn’t just anger me, it spears directly into my soul. To think, this is the man people look up to in any capacity befuddles me in a way that I’ll never come to terms with.

    • Speaking as another woman in her sixties, I couldn’t agree with you more. The only partial consolation for me when I come up against situations like this is to remember that there are far more stupid and frightened people out there than it’s possible to believe.

      Just keep banging your head up against brick walls, it’s trying but fun when you break through. Good Luck with life!

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