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TV Show Recaps

Once Upon A Time 310: This Doesn’t Even Make Sense Anymore

There is a scene in this episode involving Snow and Charming taking on a Medusa that looks like she’s straight out of a Sega Genesis game, and it is ridiculous. I can’t even describe to you the completely ludicrous nature of this scene, I really can’t.

Kate December 11, 2013 18 Comments
Geekery TV Show Recaps

Star Trek N00b, Episode 1: The Cage (of Forced Heterosexuality)

“The Talosians realize that Pike isn’t sold, and try to seduce him with a bizarre harem illusion with Vina as a green exotic dancer. Dayum, Pike. You’ve got some weird fantasies.”

Loraine December 10, 2013 45 Comments
TV Show Recaps

American Horror Story Episode 308 Recap: The Sacred Faking

“Apparently the witches’ journey to New Orleans was just like the Oregon Trail, only with less fiber and more smelly vaginas! This fucking show, you guys. This. Fucking. Show.”

Chelsea December 9, 2013 10 Comments
TV Show Recaps

Glee Episode 508 Recap: Previously Unaired Christmas Gets A Little Too Much Air

What drug were the Glee writers on while designing this year’s Christmas special? That question and more will not be answered in this week’s recap!

Riese December 8, 2013 23 Comments
TV Show Recaps

Once Upon A Time Recap Episode 309: Gay-Ass Mommy Issues

At this point, we’ll be lucky if we make it out of the season without a reveal that Pongo is the father of Rapunzel who is married to Smee who is secretly the child of Flounder who is actually the son of one of the scary trees from Snow White.

Kate December 3, 2013 22 Comments
TV Show Recaps

Glee Episode 507 Recap: Puppet Masterpiece Theater Should Girl It Up Maybe

This week on Glee, everybody turned in to a muppet and Santana and Dani didn’t make out!

Riese November 29, 2013 29 Comments
TV Show Recaps

American Horror Story Episode 307 Recap: The One With The Zombie Threesome

Welcome to the seventh episode of American Horror Story, featuring an award-winning musical score by Hans Zimmer. I’m sorry, that’s not Hans Zimmer; it’s two goblins humping on a Casio keyboard. My mistake.

Chelsea November 24, 2013 17 Comments
TV Show Recaps

Glee Episode 506 Recap: Movin’ Out Of F*cks To Give

This week on Glee, everybody sang Billy Joel songs and everything hurt!

Riese November 22, 2013 31 Comments
TV Show Recaps

Once Upon A Time Episode 308 Recap: Magical Daddy Issues

I hope you like dad jokes, because this recap is chock full of them.

Kate November 19, 2013 24 Comments
TV Show Recaps

American Horror Story 306 Recap: Fond Memories of the Jazz Age

Welcome to the sixth episode of American Horror Story, where I come face to face with my greatest fear: bad New Orleans accents!

Chelsea November 18, 2013 8 Comments
TV Show Recaps

Glee Episode 505 Recap: The End of Twerk Should Really Be The End Of Will Schuster’s Career

This week on Glee, enthusiastic children danced and sang and broke walls as William Schuster toed the blurred line between “the worst” and THE WORST.

Riese November 17, 2013 31 Comments
TV Show Recaps

Super Special Double Feature “Once Upon A Time” Episodes 306 and 307 Recap: Part of Your Healthy Uterine World

“But then again, my favorite princess was Belle, whose Stockholm Syndrome didn’t register as an issue to me, so long story short: Disney princesses fucked with all of our childhood concepts of healthy relationships.”

Kate November 13, 2013 26 Comments
TV Show Recaps

Glee Episode 504 Recap: Stop Trying To Make “A Gaga or A Katy?” Happen

This week on Glee, everybody took turns dressing up like idiots and my gay boyfriend Adam Lambert showed up to sing a tune or two!

Riese November 10, 2013 22 Comments
TV Show Recaps

American Horror Story 305 Recap: Burn, Witch, Burn

“Just when all hope seems lost, Zoe beheads the zombie while wielding a motherfucking chainsaw! Look who just became an interesting character!”

Chelsea November 9, 2013 12 Comments
TV Show Recaps

American Horror Story 304 Recap: Fearful Pranks Ensue

“I would love to know how much money this show spends on snakes, drummers, and chalk.”

Chelsea November 3, 2013 11 Comments
TV Show Recaps

Once Upon A Time 305 Recap: The One With Two Moms

“But then Mulan came charging out of the closet, and one million homos stood up and said I KNEW IT, I FUCKING KNEW IT, MOTHERFUCKING HONOR TO US ALL.”

Kate October 29, 2013 38 Comments
TV Show Recaps

Pretty Little Liars Halloween Recap: Grave New World That Has Such Lesbians In It

It’s Halloween in Rosewood! Actually it isn’t, but it’s Halloween here and the Liars are in costumes with quite a lot of cleavage!

Lizz October 28, 2013 17 Comments
TV Show Recaps

American Horror Story 303 Recap: The Replacements

Welcome to the third episode of American Horror Story, the show for all your minotaur sexin’ needs!

Chelsea October 26, 2013 12 Comments
TV Show Recaps

American Horror Story 302 Recap: Boy Parts

“Snakes hatch from eggs and crawl on them. They stab each other in the chest with needles. You know, typical married sex.”

Chelsea October 21, 2013 24 Comments
TV Show Recaps

Once Upon A Time Recap, Just The Queer Parts: Mulan Is in Love With Sleeping Beauty and It’s Awesome

Are you interested in seeing this, but don’t really want to sift through 50+ episodes just to find the cute bits? You’re in luck! I mined this series and all its queer gold and put the shiniest pieces in this post.

Laura Mandanas October 19, 2013 29 Comments
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From the Archives

  • No Filter: Ashley Benson Has Commenced in the Customary Post-Break Up New Pet
  • Unearthed Photographs of Queer Celebrities Together
  • Orange Is the New Black Episode 306 Recap: All That Is Gold Does Not Glitter

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