NSFW Lesbosexy Sunday Is Not A Love Bomb

Feature image of Barbary Rose and Rion Rhodes in Crash Pad Series episode 277. All of the photographs in this NSFW Sunday are from the Crash Pad. The inclusion of a visual here should not be interpreted as an assertion of the model’s gender identity or sexual orientation. If you’re a photographer or model and think your work would be a good fit for NSFW Sunday, please email carolyn at autostraddle dot com.

Welcome to NSFW Sunday!

Chocolate Chip and Emperatrix

Chocolate Chip and Emperatrix in Crash Pad Series episode 278

Here’s how to make and uphold your own sexual boundaries:

“The goal should always be a sexual experience where everyone feels safe and taken care of. Think of each other’s boundaries as a road map for sexual pleasure and emotional wellbeing within a relationship, and remember: Boundaries around sex differ from person to person. For example, I have a hard limit on spankings. I never want to be spanked and I communicate that with any person I have sex with. How people react to the expression of boundaries can also be telling and reveal possible red flags. If someone communicates their yeses, nos, and maybes and the person they’re having sex with doesn’t respect their boundaries, that may be a sign that the relationship should not continue in such an intimate way, at all.”

Blair and Megan Reeves

Blair and Megan Reeves in Crash Pad Series episode 279

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Are you horny? How do you tell? What does that even mean or feel like in your body?

It’s okay if not everyone likes you.

La Muxer Diosa and Zoie Blackheart

La Muxer Diosa and Zoie Blackheart in Crash Pad Series episode 281

Staring down your first-ever breakup? Here’s why it could feel like the worst thing ever:

“Although people are often quick to call first relationships puppy love, Boodram says, ‘our first breakup tends to be our most serious breakup.’ She explains, ‘I don’t think we manage expectations well enough. We don’t say, Hey, love is an extremely powerful drug, and after your first hit of it, you’re going to find it excruciatingly hard to separate, so be prepared. If we started to manage expectations better and really educate people, the first breakup might not be as much of a gut punch.'”

Blair and Megan Reeves, shot through the bars on a headboard

Blair and Megan Reeves in Crash Pad Series episode 279

Love bombing can be a mechanism of control:

“One of the problems with love bombing is that popular culture paints a bombardment of attention as the pinnacle of romance. […]

The dangers of love bombing are often overlooked because, really, who actually minds being showered with gifts, lavished with attention, and being assured of all your best qualities? But love bombing is a form of abuse – it forces you into a state of vulnerability that allows you to be easily manipulated, opening you up to much more sinister and harmful behavior.”

Carolyn Yates was formerly the NSFW Editor (2013–2018) and Literary Editor for Autostraddle.com. Her writing has appeared in Nylon, Refinery29, The Toast, Bitch, Xtra!, Jezebel, and elsewhere. She lives in Los Angeles by way of Montreal and Toronto. Find her on twitter or instagram.

Carolyn has written 972 articles for us.

7 Comments

  1. My previous partner started getting love bombed while we were still together, and later dated that person and ended up in the most fucked-up toxic situation I’ve ever witnessed. I would say this kind of behaviour is almost always indicative of someone who at the very least has poor boundaries, and at the worst sociopathic tendencies. I really appreciate your ongoing commitment to bringing these kinds of issues to light, because they don’t get talked about enough.

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