FRIDAY OPEN THREAD: Every Last Nook and Cranny

Happy Friday, passengers, and welcome to the ride of your life! It’s been seven days since our last Friday Open Thread, which happen every Friday whether you like it or not, and I’m here to apply low to moderate social pressure on you in order to solicit your feedback below. Just kidding! What I really want is for you to fork over photos of your pets, new kitchen appliances, and really amazing perfect humans in your life – and stories about them and everything under the sun – in the comments.

But first, can we please ooh and ahh over Rori Midhani’s genius.

tea party (just image)

What I’d really like to talk to you about this week are english muffins, which might seem weird, but hear me out. Geneva went back home, which means I’ve reverted back to eating Cup O’ Noodles for lunch and slices of cheese for dinner. When I’m challenged to actually fill the endless void that is my hunger, I reach in to the fridge for an english muffin, maybe put a slice of aforementioned cheese on top, and let things get toasty in the oven while I bing-watch Netflix. Considering it’s been proven scientifically impossible for me to wake up early enough to eat english muffins at their rightful time – breakfast – I like to think that at least I’m making use of something that otherwise would end up going bad. I also love bread, and if you don’t understand, you probably never will.

As much as I’d like to commit to growing up and learning how to, I dunno, cook, now I’m just stuck in the english muffin zone. I sit around thinking about how I could make english muffin pizza, or learn to poach and egg and eat it on an english muffin, or spread this friendship dip on my english muffin, or, like, buy hummus and just cover my english muffin in it, or finally get over my fear of the butter I bought that had a weird little tear in the plastic when I went to first use it and spread that on my english muffin, or trick myself into getting up at an ungodly hour just so I could savor one with my morning coffee, jam everywhere.

I’m in too deep.


America is not the world, though, and english muffins aren’t my universe. Because that’s your job! I’m all yours for the night – I’m here to listen to your woes, celebrate your victories, and show you photos of my dog. (The only catch there is that you post a photo of yours first.) I want to know absolutely everything about your week, your plans for Easter, your Passover traditions, and, more importantly, your 4/20 game plan with respect to what you’re eating, how much, and with who. SPARE NO DETAIL. DIVULGE ALL YOUR SECRETS. AND, MORE IMPORTANTLY, PICS OR IT DIDN’T HAPPEN.

Tell me everything, Straddlers Of My Dreams. Every nook and cranny. And this week, I double-dog-dare you to comment on someone else’s post, too!


How To Post a Photo In The Comments:

1. Find a photo! This is the easy part. Find a photo on the web, right click (on a Mac, control+click), hit “Copy Image URL,” and then…

2. Code it in to your comment! Use the following code:

<img src=”http://imageurlgoeshere”>

If you need to upload the photo you love from your computer, try using imgur. You cannot use the imgur link, though. You still have to right click and copy the image URL when you’re on the image page. The link you use should end in .JPG or .GIF or .PNG or something like that.

How To Post a Video In The Comments, Too:

1. Find a video on YouTube or Vimeo or WHATEVER. Click “embed.” Copy that code – NOT JUST THE URL! – but first make sure it’s for 640px wide or less. If your player is too large, it will not display properly.

2. Copy the code and paste it directly into your comment.

3. Go forth and jam.

Before you go! Autostraddle runs on the reader support of our AF+ Members. If this article meant something to you today — if it informed you or made you smile or feel seen, will you consider joining AF and supporting the people who make this queer media site possible?

Join AF+!


Carmen spent six years at Autostraddle, ultimately serving as Straddleverse Director, Feminism Editor and Social Media Co-Director. She is now the Consulting Digital Editor at Ms. and writes regularly for DAME, the Women’s Media Center, the National Women’s History Museum and other prominent feminist platforms; her work has also been published in print and online by outlets like BuzzFeed, Bitch, Bust, CityLab, ElixHER, Feministing, Feminist Formations, GirlBoss, GrokNation, MEL, Mic and SIGNS, and she is a co-founder of Argot Magazine. You can find Carmen on Twitter, Instagram and Tumblr or in the drive-thru line at the nearest In-N-Out.

Carmen has written 919 articles for us.


  1. I wish I could have an english muffin. It’s matzo until Tuesday night. :(

    I’m currently in rehearsal for a reading of a musical that I’m stage managing. My musical (that I wrote) had its reading on Tuesday, and it was amazing, and I have so many feelings.

    I have work tonight. Ah, life in the theatre.

      • Unfortunately, there are no pics. All the actors are in the actors’ union, so no recording of any kind. Maybe after much rewriting, there will be an actual production. If you’d like to see the cast picture, or some fun rehearsal-y shots, send me a private message.

  2. OK so I am confused about what an English muffin is and feeling kind of silly for not knowing what they are. Do we have them in Britain? Are they similar to crumpets? The things in that picture look sort of crumpety, but not quite crumpets.

    Anyway. I am happy this Friday because I am finally on Easter break after the longest term EVER and off to Portugal for the first time next week, yay!

    • We do have English Muffins in Britain, they’re right next to crumpets in the supermarket but in no way the same even though they look simular…they’re more bready. They are super nice with a tonne of butter and scrambled egg on. :)

  3. Howdy! It’s my birthday today and I’m going to the baseball game! (In my neck of the woods that means Red Sox vs. Orioles, rooting for the latter.)

  4. I’ve been chowing down on pack after pack of this cinnamon raisin bread that I keep at my desk at work. It stays soft for weeks at a time and its ingredient list sounds eerily similar to the flame retardant chemicals I’ve been researching.

    I’m probably mummifying my insides, but this is just so convenient and tasty that it might be worth it? Also it’s really cheap.

    • well, at least if it catches on fire, it should be fine, just slightly toasty. …….right…..?

    • Bah – everything is chemicals anyway :p – thats my excuse at least (fellow chemist (in training)).

      • Hah yeah. The more I learn about chemicals in consumer products, the more convinced I am that everyone will eventually get cancer if they just live long enough. It was alarming at first but now… meh. Just going to go ahead and get some vending machine dinner food.

  5. I bought a juicer this week, and I’ve been juicing everything humanly possible to extract juice from.

    Any juice recommendations?

    • -^Yes yes. Also carrot, apple and ginger.

      -Our standby is carrots + kale + cuke + apple + celery + whatever other fruits might be lying around (oranges, kiwi, strawberries, or lemons usually).

      -Beets!! I would put beets in every juice if my gf only had the same love for them as I.

      Also, some friends told us that it’s extra-important to have super clean fruit/veg for juicing due to the fact that you’re consuming such a large quantity of them in raw form. They gave us a tip for washing which I shall now pass on to you: put your juiceables in a big bowl, cover with cold water, add 2-3 capfuls of white vinegar and some lemon juice. Let them soak for 10 mins and then use a scrubby thing to scrub off any residual dirt/pesticides.

      • I actually have some beets here right now. I’m going to experiment with this! I did carrot apple the other day so I should try carrot and oramge. I tried apple kiwi and the kiwi made it way too bitter. Also, I tried to juice a banana. *facepalm*
        Thanks for the tip on washing fruit!

  6. It’s 9:40 sumthin p.m. here in England and missus and I are still rearranging furniture and will be for the foreseeable, or at least until we can see the bed again…seriously. It’s under there somewhere.
    Hooray the DIY is nearly over. Cups of tea and English Muffins with scrambled egg all round! If you’re ever in North Yorkshire you should try the Scrambled egg and bacon on a muffin at Bettys Tea Rooms. It’s amazing. And no Betty has no apostrophe. It kills all grammatically minded townspeople. Truth.

    • Bettys got a mention on autostraddle! My girlfriend took me there for the first time about a month ago (she is a proper yorkshire girl and knows it well) and we did the fancy tea thing – next time it will have to be English muffins with egg and bacon!

      Good luck with the DIY!

      • Excellent! Yeah a full on Victorian tearoom mentioned on AS is a tad crazy I know….but damn those muffins are good. The cream tea is also excellent. Good on your Yorkshire lass for taking you there, from one to another.

  7. mm english muffins

    i have mostly slept today because my body sucks & it hates me

    took a wtnv buzzfeed quiz & got the faceless old woman so that’s cool

    that illustration of Rori’s is really gorgeous; i really like the level of detail but it doesn’t feel overwhelming at all. and that it was balanced out with the predominantly flat coloring. and the composition is so well-balanced without being too balanced & thus stiff.

    also i got my first comment award, in conjunction with two other commenters, hehe

    i literally have nothing decent to contribute at all; i feel kind of bad & i have no life, nor am i having fun times on 4/20, nor do i have a cute pet. nor do i have anyone to snuggle me. (and that always awkward moment when someone likes one of your depressed posts on tumblr. haha idk idk) so i’m about as entertaining as a dead fish.

    by this point, i’m just trying to hang in till May, at least.

    • you definitely do have something to contribute, i was about to mourn having shitty cramps, but now I’m finding out which character from wtnv I am so you’ve basically made my night THANK YOU

      • haha, aw you’re welcome : ) i’m sorry about the cramps; i get them really badly, myself :(( do you have a heating pad you can use? -sends you one if not-

        i hope the cramps stop being bratty soon ♥

    • getting a comment award is awesome, and by default, means you are way more entertaining then dead fish! Also, the way you articulated Rori’s illustration proves you have PLENTY to contribute, friend

    • Congratulations on your first-ever Comment Award! Wishing you many more to come in the future. <3

  8. Love having Good Friday off. I took a guiltless late-afternoon nap. Now I’m making a late dinner… soon, some right-on-time gin.

    Not gonna lie, I’ve also read the “26 ways you described yourself when registering for A-camp” article for maybe the 10th time, just so I can kitten wiggle with excitement.

    Also, outstanding illustration.

  9. I just joined after sporadic lurking over the past year. I love this site, and am currently reading my way through the archives. <3

    I'm only 3 months away from moving back home, but I;m going crazy! I'm saving money like mad and have no friends up here, so I have no outlet! I can't do anything that requires money, have no one to hang out with or fuck, nothing to smoke…so I've been baking and cooking a lot. I've gained 15 lbs, and I wasn't exactly petite to begin with.

    • Unfortunately my girl is out of town for Easter+I am at homebase working all weekend. I did get an Easter care package from the parentals (with THREE novels about rediscovering Catholicism, because I vaguely mentioned praying 3 weeks ago. But, I also got chocolate and gift cards so who am I to complain, really?)

      In other news, I came out to a fellow co-worker, so I’m FINALLY getting somewhere in what seemed to be a homophobic workplace!

    • wooops, sorry Ashara, I put up MY stuff instead of a comment on yours!

      I was going to say that I feel 90% of what you are going through. I have no friends where I’ve been living too, and trying to save money on my end means doing next to nothing. If you can, may I suggest sharing your baked goods with people you work with, neighbors, landlords, etc. I used this strategy in my own high school friendless years and it got me multiple marriage proposals and some moderately FB friendships. Hang in there!

  10. Being the religionless heathen that I am, I was unaware that today was Good Friday. I reaped the benefits regardless, and only worked a half day in the office. I was informed that you’re supposed to rest on this day, but I said fuck that and got an oil change because, as my friend so descriptively put it, I’ve put it off for so long that my car was smellling like melted crayons when I started it. Then I finally finished a book I started like two years ago (Steppenwolf by Hesse), and sat around in the normal contemplative haze that most Hesse novels induce.

    Now I’m loafing on couch after just lurking through A-Camp photos and wishing I could go this year. Maybe I’ll drown my sorrows in english muffins? I got invited to see my friend’s band play and I really should go but I’ve taken a sabbatical from social gatherings and I’m not quite sure if I can be convinced to take the interstate. Besides, this thunderstorm that just descended upon my home is telling me that I have a commitment to sweatpants and Netflix. This guy doesn’t make it any easier:

  11. so I have a sore throat so my water-drinking instinct kicked in even though I KNOW that water is poison and I’m drinking an average amount of water but I have this very very small bladder so I am literally going to the bathroom to pee every 15 minutes and just nobody understands these small-bladder woes

  12. My week is going good, I was going to go on a date but it got called off because of some minor flooding in our town. I’m WAY behind on my novel though. I’ve decided to de my bangs, which is exciting.

  13. I was supposed to go out and do something “social” but the wheather sucks, so I decided to stay in, maybe smoke a little (speaking of which, I miss High Femme!) and catch up on tv shows (also known as best night ever).
    Also I’ve never tried english muffins and I think that maybe that’s the thing that’s really missing in my life.


      also — i want to smoke a little but we’re going out and i’m afraid i’ll fall asleep at the bar. life is so fucking hard.

      • That why you get day time meds, and have a little mango juice(not from concentrate), and you wouldn’t want to fall asleep.

      • Yeah, I don’t think they exist where I live? I don’t know, I must do some research and find some ;)

  14. So on the “26 ways you described yourself when registering for A-Camp” article, I decided with some other lovely people to start a Beatles tribute band. The problem?

    …the only instrument I know how to play is ukulele. HELP!


      • Thank you! Is that a good “oh my god”?

        I’ll definitely keep playing the ukulele- a few days ago I learned “Wonderwall”! *cue groan*

        • a good one! c:

          i’m actually not familiar with that song so i am not groaning, eheh. c:> are you guys really gonna perform at camp? because that would be cool c;

        • Love that song!!!! =) I can kinda play (or at least I think I still can) “champagne supernova” on guitar. Wonderwall is such a challenge some of the chords are a little fast on strumming! See you on the mountain? =)

    • Ok so with the right glasses and my hair really long I can look a touch like 70s Lennon… I too only play the Uke… Lesbian Beatles Ukulele tribute band here we come.

      • Say what? Okay, that didn’t post right. What I wanted to say was I have never heard anything that sounds more “me” than “lesbian Beatles ukulele tribute band”

  15. I’m spending my friday night addressing the metric ton of work due before final’s week and my crushing indecision over what I want to do with my degree by watching vintage Futurama and eating copious amounts of italian ice.

    In recognition of my first post on the open thread, I humbly offer this tribute:

  16. 10:55pm here UK time, parents and sister just got back from holiday (I was cat sitting while on Easter break). So essentially spent a week procrastinating and not doing my literature review (current word count 910 -> 2700-3000 required). Of the many cute things the cats have done, this was the only one caught on camera: *crosses fingers that the html gods like me today* – Her name is Lucy and yes that is my wardrobe and yes she stayed there watching me while I tried to get to sleep, and no that wasn’t the only time she did that…..

  17. I heard some comments that were pretty essentialist that bummed me out a bit, but thankfully Sunday is near and I can relax in Malibu enjoy the sights and sounds of nature doing things one would do on the 20th of April.

  18. Hi, I’m brand new here. I came across this site after thinking that a girl had a crush on me, and it seems pretty cool. I’m not sure if I belong since I’m asexual, so someone please tell me if I should go back to lurking.

    • @icanbme — everyone is welcome here. you’re here, so i welcome you. i welcome you with open arms. i welcome you like that scene in the lion king. i will lift you up to the rest of the kingdom in your glorious way.


  19. i think i just accidentally meditated
    or something like that
    and now all my eros woes are gone
    not permanently, i’m sure
    but i can’t yet feel the dread

  20. HI ALL.

    So like, I’m doing effing great. I had the day off, I worked out for a couple hours, and I’ve become incurably obsessed with Sailor Moon.

    Like…to the point of pain. I love it much too much. ALSO for anyone else who likes Sailor Moon, definitely watch the live action series Pretty Guardian Sailor Moon. It’s so good, and ReixMinako is pretty much canon in it. Like…it’s not explicitely stated, but it’s very very clear and obvious and dude is it freaking hot.

  21. I spent hours glazing a piece for my ceramics class. It’s A-Camp inspired and I am so excited for the finished piece!!! I’ve also been making self care quote pictures for a collage project I’m doing. Artsy Friday!!!

  22. Today is Spring Cleaning and I’m on a mission to destroy everything that’s dirty, dusty, & dated

    • i think i might be ready to start mad men, actually. i went through a deep mad men phase before people liked it, like, when it was actually ummmm on tv and not on netflix and everyone was like “EW WHAT YOU WATCH AMC?” and i gave it up bc i had no cable or netflix, and then bc i was far behind, but now it’s ending so i’m like… maybe i’m ready.

      i feel you, is what i’m saying. i feel you.

  23. Every time I tell myself I am going to post to the Friday thread because let’s be honest…I like talking about things I want to do even if no one bothers to read it. I usually get sidetracked by a shiney object and then I never post. But alas good autostraddlers there are no shiney objects around, let’s make this happen.

    I am moving to Seattle post A-Camp (yeah in a month-ish) Like legit right after camp…like as soon as camp ends I will be trekking to Seattle (or anywhere for that matter) so if you see a small child like critter with too many suitcases for a 5 day camp it is only me.

    Oh and work doesn’t know yet because well that is a whole other story, I won’t bore you with those details.

    I want to scream from the rooftops, “I’M DOING ME! Oh wait…no not like that…well kind of like that…err”

    Let’s all name things they would like to scream from rooftops.



    • jealous of your move to seattle. awesome place! scream my name from the rooftops so that when i visit, people are like “oh my god, you’re carmen rios?”

      just an idea. #famewhore

      • I would like to scream “Anyone out there that can give me an alternative lifestyle haircut? Anyone?” because we are slowly venturing into mullet territory right about now, and I’m not sure if I trust a salon named Trimmers attached to a fish n chip shop in a town of 3,000 people to do this. I might have to just go for it though, because I am an overgrown mess, and I may have identified one possibly queer girl in town. ALSO HI NIKKI!

        • OH Hey Katie! I am so sorry you might have to venture to Trimmers.
          But you could get fish n chips too.

          P.S. if I am still in Seattle when you come back to the USA I might lure you there :)


        I am just waiting for the person to type, “WHY IS EVERYONE YELLING! DO YOU KNOW HOW LATE IT IS?”

  24. I spent an hour debating the reasons I hop buildings when I have to pee during classes longer than an hour. I am squishy and tiny stalls are claustrophobia inducing. Seriously, my hips do not need to be touching the dispenser on one side and the shiny silver box on the other. Public bathrooms and I do not get along.

  25. I’m trying not to nap, watching Game of Thrones/listening to my “nostalgia” playlist – middle school music – which is exclusively white stripes and killers discography. This is my first time watching it, and after being thoroughly spoiled by tumblr, I’m actually a bit…disappointed? I think I’m doing it wrong, because I don’t care about Jon Snow, the Wall, Stark angst, or Khal Drogo, which seems to be an unpopular opinion? I never felt the need to watch it because I felt like I already had, and had all these mental connections between the gifsets on tumblr that are actually all wrong. I LOVE CERSEI and Daenerys and kind of Joffrey, the little shit, too??? Very confusing world we live in. I just feel like they have everything this show needs, you know…

    • I love the gif! That pretty much says everything that is awesome about the series.

      I have not yet watched the show, but I have read the first book and adored it. I also love Daenerys (and her dragons), and I like Cersei (probably a lot more because Lena Headey plays her). I’m also fond of Tyrion.

  26. I’m at home being super uncomfortable because I got a notice from my property management company that they were showing my apartment at 2 today and then at work, someone mentioned they were seeing an apartment in my building at 2.

    Hopefully they weren’t too observant, or I just got outed by my giant LGBT for Obama sign hanging in my bedroom. Not that I’m particularly in the closet at work, but the idea of a work acquaintance wandering around in my home without me there really creeps me out.

  27. Does anyone know about/live in Summit, NJ? I just got an internship placement there for the summer, and the town seems cool, but I am unable to find a lot of what it’s like other than a lot of fancy restaurants and fancy gyms.

    Cool areas? Demographic info? What to do when I get bored (other than take the train in to NYC)? Good ethnic food? Do I NEED to bring my car (which would involve driving from Wisconsin) to get around, or can I manage on foot/public transit?

    I’m sure I can direct all these questions to my internship, but also looking for a variety of perspectives


    • uh my bff lives basically in summit? also she is super queer. so the queers, they exist in summit! i know nothing about the town tho. if you want, i will ask her stuff or maybe put you two in touch.

  28. I am working on my undergrad thesis which is due Monday and also my laundry! Anyone else up for some thesis and/or laundry solidarity??

    • I’m spending tomorrow working on my undergrad thesis. I put off laundry until Sunday so I can say that my entire weekend was productive.

    • I’m spending the weekend “working on my undergrad thesis” aka watching netflix…..every night next week will be spent actually writing while wondering why I’m so incapable of doing homework on the weekend

    I could massively expand my knowledge of food.
    Delicious meals, all the time.
    I’m sure they would teach me baking, which is so difficult for me because I don’t have the ability to follow a recipe. I just put things together and it’s magical. Unfortunately, unless you know what you’re doing, my style of cooking doesn’t apply to baking at all.
    I may really enjoy being in charge of people in a kitchen.
    If I worked in a kitchen, it’s unlikely that I would ever feel cold at work.
    I would have a sense of accomplishment that only comes from being able to put art and food together on a plate. Cooking is an art that involves all of the senses. It has texture, taste, smell, and it’s always nice when food is visually pleasing. I suppose you don’t hear most food, after it’s on your plate, but I bet, if challenged, I could come up with an example for food that you can hear.
    Maybe I would get famous. Probably not, but I certainly have a better chance of fame as a chef than I do as unemployed.
    People would call me Chef Meg, which I’m sure sounds great out loud.
    Running around a kitchen for many hours would probably be fantastic exercise.

    Being a chef is not a very family friendly job. Long hours, not very many days off. I have a 1 year old daughter.
    What if I can’t pay off my school loans?
    What if nobody wants to hire me?
    What if I get hired, and then suck at my job?
    What if I get hired, and the owner of the restaurant won’t give me control over the menu?
    Ritilan, or another ADD medication. People who really have ADD don’t get high off of stimulants, thus making them annoying and a whole bunch of other unpleasant adjectives.
    What if I choose a school where the culinary arts program is a joke?
    Being a chef is hard work, and it is NOT optional for a chef to not have the ability to control a room and make people listen to them. I’m just not naturally intimidating, this could present an issue.
    Cleaning. Maybe as a chef I’ll be able to tell people to clean for me, but I just can’t visualize them cleaning as effectively as I’d like things to be cleaned. If you want something done right…
    What if I get famous? Famous people deal with a lot of criticism. That doesn’t sound like much fun at all.
    What if I can’t ever bake?
    What if I can’t be on my feet for that many hours a day? I’m very out of shape.
    What if I don’t like my job as much as I thought I would?
    What if cooking all day long ruins cooking for me?

  30. Well since i’m Jewish I can’t have bread until Tuesday :(
    but I have a date tomorrow and maybe i’ll eat a muffin who knows ;D

  31. I don’t really have anything interesting to share other than that I am going to a wedding tomorrow.

    But, since you mentioned English muffins I feel compelled to share that I really love them and that they’re a bit of a comfort food for me. I eat them whenever I get sick because they’re just bland enough to not upset my stomach.
    A couple of months ago I caught a bug from my tiny, adorable pre-school aged niece and ventured to the kitchen for one of them and, lo!, they were nowhere to be found! I had JUST bought them the day before, and had only eaten one. After a few minutes I got a hunch and called my sister to ask if she had absconded with them after visiting that afternoon. Her response: “Yeah, I took them to use as hamburger buns because I didn’t feel like going to the grocery store.”

    *I really hope that gif works, because that story is pretty irrelevant to….well, anything really, and I just wanted an excuse to use that gif.

  32. I’m re-watching season 1 of Orphan Black before the new season starts tomorrow, I’ve been looking forward to this (the final re-watch before the new season (I’ve been looking forward to the new season since immediately after the season 1 finale aired)) for like the last month.

    Also, I totally had English Muffins made into little pizzas as a kid and they were awesome

    • Oooh, I completely forgot that Orphan Black’s new season starts tomorrow. Here’s hoping for some AS recaps. Maybe?

    • if anyone (like me, hi) was freaking out at the possibility that they might kill off Cosima, I found this quote quite heartening. it’s from the writers’ reddit AMA today:

      “The Cophine relationship, we really loved anyway and to see it get that much support and to see that people thought that it was an important relationship to be on TV made us want to continue it and bolster it. And yeah, why the hell is that? Why do lesbian characters always die in TV? RIP Tara.

  33. It’s Saturday for me here in New Zealand, where I’m long-term backpacking, and I have a one day weekend before going back to work at my temporary job that I begrudgingly took to save money for more traveling! It’s like after 1pm and I’m still laying in bed and feeling horrible for wasting all of my free time since I’ve gotten this job, because I am in a bit of a depressive funk and being a sentimental homesick sad sack (which I know is bullshit, because I hated it at home). I’m surrounded my mountains and loveliness, but all I do is go online and look at radical tumblrs and feminist shit and look at jobs on Austin’s craigslist. Also the older married couple I am renting a room from are starting to drive me nuts, and the husband said something complainy about all of the “queers in Sydney,” and I was so shocked I just stared at him and was like, what?? and reply maybe a little too antagonistically to his misidentification of Dhani Harrison as Paul’s son (“No, it’s George HARRISON!”). Honestly I’m so over dealing with horrible homophobic/misogynistic men on this trip, I am just too tired to talk to him about it and/or find somewhere else cheap to live for the next 3 weeks, so I’ve been hiding in my room. I am going to try to go hiking today I guess. It really is lovely here, I just am really seeing how much I need to live somewhere with a queer community.

    • Hi Katie,
      Just wanted to say that I too am in a mountain town in NZ (methven south island) on holiday and am loving the town, and I can relate big time to the need to cultivate and enjoy queer women’s community. I plan to live here someday and am scoping out the possibilities.

      where are you going hiking today? I am enjoying seeing and BEING in the Southern Alps again, bliss. I love it here.

      • I went on a walk in Te Anau on a small part of the Kepler Track. I always thought of myself as a city girl who loved nature, but now I could really see myself actually living somewhere smaller with great access to good hiking and outdoor activities. So it’s a real conundrum, isn’t it? I think I’m going to have to have some youthful queer funtimes in a bigger city and maybe “settle down” somewhere more remote farther down the road. But statistically speaking, you know there have to be more queer ladies hiding somewhere in these smaller places! I know I can’t be the only one!

  34. Let’s see…I’m studying for my three exams next week and looking forward to tomorrow, when my dad is meeting my girlfriend for the first time! Yay!

    • Update: Dad and GF get along really well, test material appears manageable, and it’s a beautiful day! Everything is even better than expected.

  35. I’m under 21 and my housemates are not so they all ditched me to go to a bar. I am compensating my watching Destiny’s Child “Survivor” on repeat on youtube and drinking their alcohol ( I got permission).

    • This is like me except for I’m the age where driving is a big deal so all my friends go get in their cars and I’m like “I’ll be there an hour after you because I have to wait for a city bus to arrive, have fun without me!”

  36. TOMORROW is going to be awesome. My girlfriend and I were telling our friend that we can never be alone together so now this friend is giving us a key to her house while she’s out with her brother and her mom is out of town.


    And that is the most exciting feeling ever for us high school lesbians. Especially us high school lesbians who have parents that won’t let your girlfriend come over when they aren’t home.

    These brief three hours of tomorrow will be the best I have had in… ages.

  37. I’m excited because this week I have managed to not miss the friday open thread like I always do! Also, yesterday I wore my first ever plaid shirt outside of the house and it was a very exciting experience. How many selfies is too many? asking for a friend

  38. Earlier today I sent my girlfriend off on a bus to see her family for Easter weekend, our first bit of time apart since we moved into our studio together. Therefor I’m spending Friday night at home alone with the cat, subjecting him to my pathetic lack-of-lady-induced sappiness. I was hungry, so I laid out all the fixings for a delicious taco. I got up for one second to get a spoon for my sour cream, only to discover that Boobahz had chewed a hole in the middle of my tortilla in my absence. So I made him wear it:

    He’s had it on for about an hour now.

  39. I don’t usually comment on these/don’t usually comment a lot in general but I feel like I should mention that I had an English muffin for tea today?

    Is there a muffin club? Can we start one and exchange our favourite ways to eat them? I would comment all the time if there was, you guys.

  40. my littlest two cuddled up to sleep! which is my main friday night plan, without the cuddling…oh well

  41. Hello Straddleverse! Today I hauled around large tree branches to clean up the camp I volunteer/work at and also chopped and sawed wood while wearing flannel!

    Do I get lumberjack points or lesbian points? In this case, I am not sure.

  42. This week has been the most difficult in a while. Not only am I currently swamped with classwork, but my long term gf and I decided to call it off… among other reasons, my closeted status finally drove her away. Idk how to deal with this break up and being so tired of the closet… Any advice from you lovely straddlers?

    • awwwww I am sending you lots of love. being in the closet can be hard.. and especially if the person you are with doesn’t understand.. so first of all don’t be too hard on yourself. second of all, do something for yourself today that you call “self care” pancakes? manicure? Massage. I love massages, :). Maybe go to Tj Max and buy yourself something. Whatever works. Give yourself some time to think, or if that is too much, see a comedy or a movie. You have to come out of the closet on your own time. sending you lots of love.

      • Thanks for the comment and advice, Danielle! Really appreciate it. You’re right, though. Gotta come out on my own time and do some self-care in the meantime.


  43. I maintain that friday isn’t over until I go to sleep. My grandmother died on christmas this year, and easter’s the first family holiday without her around. I’ve spent this week being insufferable and talking nonstop about Germans, philosophy, quitting academia, and nothingness until I finally realized that I’m also just really sad. Grief’s funny like that. So I gave myself today off and had a game night with some friends last night that followed into brunch today. Pancakes help with everything. I just got back from seeing Tycho at Webster Hall in Manhattan with a good friend of mine, made myself a spicy hummus and veggie sandwich and a big ass mug of tea. Tomorrow my best friend and I are going to see the World Inferno Friendship Society and deal with how much we both hate holidays. And sunday is going to be awkward. I don’t really know how I’m going to feel aside from full of cream eggs.
    I also met a girl at work. Completely different department and I’m not 100% if she’s not-straight but she’s pinging pretty damn hard (our coworkers aren’t the most friendly in this regard). We’re planning a couple different occasions to do stuff outside of work, so I’m really hoping that works out. Fingers and toes crossed.

  44. carmen i love you but an entire open thread about english muffins is a fucked up thing to do to me on passover.

    • YES, what Stef said. I’m eating so much peanut butter on matzah right now and it’s not an english muffin. fuck.

      • just think of it as the ultimate test of your willpower, y’all.

        if it helps, i love matzah, but couldn’t afford it.

  45. I’m stuck in the uni library on a Saturday and everyone else here is clearly an exchange student, which is cosy but sort of affirms that I should be doing something Easter-y? When I ventured outside to buy Belgian waffles (no English muffins, but close enough I guess? I have never had an English muffin) I had to sort of politely nudge my way through a whole bunch of tourists. I’m reading about cyborgs though, so that’s cool!

  46. I just brought my plane ticket for A-camp so excited!!!! Time to get cute for my Nephew’s birthday party

  47. I had a week of flowers. My ladyfran bought me a ‘just because’ bouquet earlier this week then drunkenly picked me more last night. She’s a friggin’ dreamboat and all I want to do is write shitty but heartfelt haiku for her.

    Tomorrow we’re going to my brother’s annual Easter Feaster. Skittles vodka + ham galore. Life has been really good to me lately. As always, I am sending the most positive of vibes to everyone.

  48. Weekend goals: A list –
    -Try to not obsess over impending a-camp
    -Visit new niece at hospital
    -Try not to wear out my and my camera’s welcomeness in said niece’s face
    -Practice more uke
    -Work on deciding to/not to sign up for a camp second stage spot
    -sub goal-work on not wanting to puke @ idea of doing stuff in front of a crowd
    -Work on photography edits & stuff
    -Go to work
    -Take older niece & nephew egg hunting
    -Convince them to give me eggs that I may then devil and eat
    -Make time for video games/sleep/tv

    Bonus new niece picture:

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