Bring Cheer to Queers: Host an Autostraddle Holigay Party This December!

The holiday season is about love and togetherness, so why don’t we spend it together? Sprinkled in-between the holiday magic of consumerism, family gatherings that might provoke extreme stress, and the depths of seasonal affective disorder, a couple of hours with your fellow ‘straddlers can go a long way.

This December, keep it queer and full of cheer. Host an Autostraddle Holigay Party in your city!


Last year, Autostraddle readers partied for good at HoliGAY meet-ups around the world with their chosen queer families, close friends, and probably a few cats. This year, we’re doing it all over again!

Hosting an Autostraddle Holigay Party in your city is as simple as a sugarplum. Just set a date, make a Facebook event (not required, but recommended), and mosey on over to our events portal to tell us the details and get the event posted on our calendar. You can even click here to download a custom image for your Facebook event, and once you register we’ll send over some more graphics to help you promote your party all over social media.

If you’re afraid of hosting, don’t be! Your holigay celebration doesn’t need to take place on a private resort or involve a walking, talking snowman to earn our respect. You can keep it simple and make brunch or dinner reservations at a neighborhood hangout, get personal and have some folks over your place for dancing and drinks, or just go with your gut and get gussied up to go out on the town.

There’s no format for these parties, and there are no rules (except maybe, y’know, being really f*cking awesome to each other once you get there). Live your dreams! And also, live your truths. Because that’s important to me.

We’ll be announcing all of the parties on December 1, so be sure to make plans now if you want to host! If you’re looking for inspiration, check out our holigay craft and clothing ideas from seasons of yore like 2013, 2012, and 2011, follow our holigay board on Pinterest, and keep an eye on the front page of this really revolutionary website, Autostraddle Dot Com, which I heard through the grapevine will be providing you with fashion advice, recipes, and decoration ideas galore as your party nears. How magical!

Until December comes, you can find your fellow ‘straddlers, share your party ideas, and generally express holiday delight with reckless abandon by using the hashtag #HappyHoligays. I’ll be watching that hashtag and checking it twice until the whole gosh darn season comes to a sad end, so HOP ON IT.

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Carmen spent six years at Autostraddle, ultimately serving as Straddleverse Director, Feminism Editor and Social Media Co-Director. She is now the Consulting Digital Editor at Ms. and writes regularly for DAME, the Women’s Media Center, the National Women’s History Museum and other prominent feminist platforms; her work has also been published in print and online by outlets like BuzzFeed, Bitch, Bust, CityLab, ElixHER, Feministing, Feminist Formations, GirlBoss, GrokNation, MEL, Mic and SIGNS, and she is a co-founder of Argot Magazine. You can find Carmen on Twitter, Instagram and Tumblr or in the drive-thru line at the nearest In-N-Out.

Carmen has written 919 articles for us.


  1. ALRIGHT OC STRADDLERS AND LA STRADDLERS I’ve been wanting to do some sort of pre-Christmas pre-Hanukkah crafting/present wrapping/eating and drinking get together party thing; does brunchtime on the 6th or 13th of December sound okay? I can host at my house! I’ll post something on the fb groupm, too!

    • I would say 12/13 is better because it gives people more time. Also it’s before the start of Hanukkah

    • I made a meetup! It’s on the calendar. Ended up being on the 6th because that’s when most of our fb commenters could go; there seem to be a ton of other parties/things in the 13th and not so much on the 6th. Anyway,


  2. Any Straddlers in the north of Spain? I’m in the Basque Country. If I’m not the only one around these parts, I’d love to do something.

  3. Western NY and Central NY take note, I’m bringing the straddleverse to Rochester, NY! Details coming soon, but if you live near-ish Rochester (or Buffalo or Syracuse), I’d love to meet you!

    So don’t make it weird and like it’s just me and my boo and the cat. I’d be sad. Let’s do this!

  4. CINCY STRADDLERS: what are the chances of having a fiesta after the 12th? Because I really wanna meet y’all and I won’t be in the nasty nati ’til then.

    • I’m up in Logan so I can’t really organize, but I’m 100% behind doing a thing! (On not-a-weekday!)

      • I’m in Logan also. If this shindig is planned for a weekend then maybe, my lady friend and I can make it. Whatever the case, it’s nice to meet local straddlers :)

      • Well Kae, what do you think about just starting up a Logan group? I have a few friends who would go for a coffee after you all get done w/ semester. Find me here or on Facebook if you would like to hang out w/ us sometime. Happy Holidays :)

  5. I’ll be in PDX Dec 7th-14th, Boston/Cambridge area 15th-21st, and Buenos Aires for the rest of the year… So I wouldn’t be able to host, but I’d love to get as much holigay goodness in my life as possible!!

  6. Anyone in Southern Oregon? I’m in Ashland, I’d be willing to host if there are people in the area. I may be able to travel to portland depending on timing.

    • Hey! I’m new to Bend from Arizona do I’m not sure how far away you are from me but I’d be down to figure something out! If you’re interested message me and we can get it happening!

  7. London straddlers lezdo this. (I’d offer to host but I’m barely active on AS and am also about to become embroiled in the biggest pile of work ever.)

    • there are seattle straddlers, many of them lurky loos.

      I would help you plan that, tho my cookies do not travel east of lake washington, but I am also not in charge of everybody.

    • I’d be up for a Seattle thing. Can’t really host though (not out to my roommates). Happy to help make food or whatever though :)

    • Tacoma here. I’d also be interested in something in the south sound area (Tacoma, Seattle, or some parts of the east side), but not hosting. I’m still in the closet to most people and fairly introverted, so hosting an event would be pretty far out of my comfort zone at this point in time. But I’d love to meet some people here. :) (And of course, happy to help contribute to food.)

      • so a few options:

        we could have some kind of brunch/drinks meetup at the type of place that is insufficiently fussy so we could bring things like cookies and whatever to share, or just get festive brunch (there are a few places in georgetown that might be a reasonable distance, idk)

        we could designate a meetup (I am sort of obsessed with renting rooms for free at the library lately), tho I don’t know the library’s stance on cookies

        alternatively, I could host, tho I live in fairly far north Seattle and it’s not super accessible by transit, also we have a doofy medium-sized dog, but our house is cozy and we could make a fire, so.

        What do y’all think?

        • Any of those sound good to me. I’m all for cheap stuff, so free library rooms sound great. And I have a car, so commuting isn’t a huge issue for me. Your house and dog sound awesome, if you’re willing to put in the extra work of having it at your place. But of course, I don’t speak for everyone.

        • I’d be pretty much ok with whatever.

          I think Chuck’s Hop Shop lets you bring your own food, but I’m not sure how well cookies and beer go together. We could probably also convince to let the Asgard Tavern let us have food (they’re super chill), but again with the beer thing.

          I also have a car and could probably give rides to 2-3 people who don’t (to wherever it ends up being), but not super in to driving all over the suburbs.

          Depending on when it is and how many people there would be, I *may* be able to host a small-ish thing … but my place isn’t incredibly large.

    • I’m in downtown Orlando and would be interested in hosting one! Literally steps away from the only lesbian bar we have…

    • I’m in downtown Orlando and would be interested in hosting one! Literally steps away from the only lesbian bar we have…

    • I’m in JAX!Just submitted an event for a meet up but we could change it to a weekend to make it a FL wide one.

  8. Some Philly area straddlers are putting together a holiday card making party/fundraiser/potluck brunch for Black and Pink (

    It’s on Sunday December 14th at the William Way Center. More info to come, and all are welcome!

  9. I just wanna drag some humans not from NOLA that live here to Celebration in the Oaks, but alas it is at night and I have no form of driver’s license what so ever or even a facebook.

    It’s in City Park and you can take the Canal streetcar line down to NOMA and walk but it’s a night event and I don’t want to possibly put anyone in a dangerous situation trying to get home at night alone.

    I wish I had a commerical driver’s license and a bus so I could pick pick people at pre-agreed upon points and have jug of mulled cider in the back and some gingerbread to pass around.
    Holigay party bus….damnit I have too many good thoughts that require more cash than I gots.
    Any NOLA peeps got any better ideas for this?
    Cause its fucking beautiful and I need to shaaaaare.

    • Actually, I was thinking the same thing when I saw this and didn’t know if anyone would be interested.

      • Celebration is the Oaks is beautiful but the night is dark and full of bad GOT references I can’t finish because I feel too lame and don’t want scare people off

  10. Hey all! Would anyone be interested in a West Hollywood/Valley/Silverlake CA meetup? Laguna Beach is a bit of a hike for me. Happy to host at home or at a restaurant/etc?

    • hey @manglebrot! just letting you know, LA is kind of a huge hub for ‘straddlers. i’m sure if you host something, folks will come! encouraging you formally to DO IT!

      (also, you’re in the LA straddlers group, right?)

        • I’m sorry Laguna’s such a trek! I’m sure whatever you put on will be totally awesome.

          And yes, that’s the right group! Maybe see you around sometime! :)

  11. There’s an AS writer living in Dublin! this is Awesome! Good Luck with your Holigay Party Kate, agus Céad míle fáilte romhat!

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