Boob(s On Your) Tube: “The 100” Buries Lexa and Maybe Itself

It appears that we lost two more lesbian TV characters on The Vampire Diaries last night. Heather is at the tail end of her vacation and will do the research to report back to you on in Tuesday’s Boob(s On Your) Tube. We’ll also see the return of Empire, a late but great peek at this week’s Grey’s Anatomy, and some much needed queer sitcom happiness. In the meantime, Lexa’s funeral happened last night, and the episode was even more abysmal than I imagined.

The 100

Thursdays on The CW at 9:00 p.m.

Written by Karly

The 100 -- "Stealing Fire" -- Image HU309b_0022 -- Pictured: Eliza Taylor as Clarke -- Credit: Cate Cameron/The CW -- © 2016 The CW Network, LLC. All Rights Reserved

What’s under that cloth?

The 100 -- "Stealing Fire" -- Image HU309b_0019 -- Pictured: Cory Grute-Andrew as Aden -- Credit: Cate Cameron/The CW -- © 2016 The CW Network, LLC. All Rights Reserved

The 100. It died.

Lexa. Lexa. Lexa. Lexa.

The name kept repeating in my head. My heart pounding in my chest, blood pounding in my ears, sweat pouring out of my body, and adrenaline sitting in my legs with nowhere to go. This was a panic attack. My third in three hours. I’ve never felt them at this rate or severity before. They’d fade after 10-15 minutes and then return right when I let my guard down. That’s what it felt like at least, but of course it was completely out of my control, guard up or down.

This was six days after Thirteen aired. A few factors probably contributed to my attacks, but my brain-on-fire chose Lexa to repeat in a voice that didn’t entirely sound like my own. It sounded like something far away, like in that space between dreaming and consciousness when you don’t have any control of where your mind is going. Except I was wide awake. The next day after my attacks I felt so drained, but I also felt afraid. What has happened to me?

My life was in hyperdrive but Lexa hadn’t left my thoughts at all. I’m in graduate school full time, TA two classes, and I have another part time job in the evenings. And I was hurdling toward midterms. I wrote my recap for Thirteen in a one hour break between class and work, with little sleep and no food. In fact, in the days between the episode and my panic attacks I hadn’t eaten more than one meal a day, some days only snacks. I remember being genuinely amazed by this because I’m hypoglycemic: usually if I don’t eat every 4-6 hours, my blood sugar crashes and I become seriously ill. But I didn’t feel shaky or fatigued or hungry. I was in starvation mode. This was truly affecting me physiologically. It wasn’t until I had my attacks that I realized how much.

“Grief isn’t in stages, it’s continuous cycles,” a friend told me. And I felt them.

Yes, I was angry. Yes, I was sad. Sometimes switching back and forth, other times simultaneously. They won’t get me again, I swore to myself on my drive to school one day. They won’t fucking get me to buy into this again.

But I was also ashamed. How could I have had such hope? How can I feel so upset about a character? Why couldn’t I just cry then heal like I have with so many others before her?

When I tried to explain what was going on to my coworkers and family I couldn’t stop smiling because I realized just how ridiculous it would sound to them, and immediately felt uncomfortable. (And when I feel uncomfortable in social interactions, I smile). Thank God I have my friends online who understand. I can’t imagine how much worse this could have been without them. We went through this together.

Thankfully I was talking to my friends right up until last night’s episode because I was dreading it. It was the funeral and the first 13 minutes had already been released. I had avoided watching them, but heard what happened. But I knew I had to watch it. This may be triggering.

Clarke and Murphy have been held in Clarke’s bedroom for the last 24 hours, where Lexa’s black bloodstains still remain. The nightbloods have been summoned for the conclave. Titus wants to let them go, but Clarke wants to see Lexa. They go to the ceremony room. Lexa lies in a sheet, and Aden is performing a ritual, with all the other kids on their knees behind him. Clarke keeps herself from getting too emotional: she wants to confirm with Aden that when he becomes commander (he was Lexa’s favorite after all), that the SkaiKru will be safe. Aden assures that whoever is chosen will protect Clarke and her people; Lexa made all of them vow it. They loved her.

This tender moment is ruined by Ontari and Roan, who have returned from Ice Nation for the conclave. Ontari is a nightblood so she must be allowed to compete for the “flame” (the AI in Lexa’s neck). Ontari has no intention of competing fairly. Clarke doesn’t want to leave until she is certain Aden is chosen and tries to persuade Titus to make sure he wins. And while they argue, Ontari slaughters every single young nightblood, dousing herself in black blood. When the crowds are summoned to the ceremony room, Ontari shows them Aden’s head.

They do not show the murders, they do not show Aden’s head, but the violence of this act strikes deep because of how senseless it is. Just like Lexa, these children are murdered 90 seconds after they show emotion, the minute they express love and grief.

Later, Clarke reminds Titus of the nightblood who wasn’t killed at Lexa’s conclave. Her name is Luna and Clarke conveniently remembers that Lincoln knows where she is. Titus gives Clarke the flame and a book with the Ascension ritual inside. This is all neat and tidy storytelling and doesn’t make any practical sense. But it’s all for naught. Ontari realizes the flame is gone. Titus commits suicide and the camera hovers over it for way too long (who directed this episode?). Ontari just decides “tell the people I’ve ascended, they won’t even check.” Why has this never happened before, if this is an option? Ontari is the commander anyway and will attempt to wipe out SkaiKru. Good riddance, really.

In Arkadia, everything is still awful. Bellamy has had a change of heart and he has a hard time understanding why people are mad at him? Octavia chains him up with Indra while she attempts to rescue Kane, Sinclair and Lincoln from their executions.

While they escape, Pike announces on the radio that if Lincoln doesn’t turn himself in, all the grounders in jail will be executed. Lincoln can’t let his people be slaughtered, so he surrenders. He is led into the middle of Arkadia in chains, pushed down to his knees, and shot in the head. He was shot because he loved his people and wanted to protect them. Octavia looks on from outside the gates. She weeps leading up to the execution but after it’s over, her face hardens into steely resolve. Women have to suck it up, you know.

These deaths hurt because there is no hope. In the beginning, I believed the point of this show was that we have abilities inside ourselves, like strength, adaptability, pragmatism, wisdom, and capacity to love already that make us able to survive in a world like The 100. But not anymore. Now this show is trying to say that if you love someone, that if you have hope, it will be robbed from you. Is this the kind of story they really want to tell?

I still think of Lexa often. I still feel sad and angry at times, but it’s quieter now. I’m comforted knowing there are so many others like me, and I know now we shouldn’t feel ashamed. We contributed to some real good with the Trevor Project fundraiser. We’re holding creators accountable and gaining attention from so many mainstream sites. Our fight isn’t over. Ste yuj.

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Karly has written 9 articles for us.


  1. What I get from season 3: love is weakness, wanting peace will get you killed, minorities are disposable, mass murderers will get redeemed. Such a great show, huh?

    The whole thing about nightbloods makes no sense. They are so rare, so why kill them in the conclave? What happens if Ontari gets killed before they find Luna? The flamekeeper is super important and yet he is the only one and has no apprentices? Titus blames Clarke for Lexa’s death (!) but has a change of heart two seconds later and decides to give the most important thing in his life to Clarke? Why is Ontari accepting whatever Murphy is doing? There are no guards in the tower? How did Ontari have access to the nightbloods? No one heard anything? No one fought her? This whole plot is so absurd. This show really shot itself in the foot.

    RIP The 100

      • I haven’t watched the episode in full, but is Clarke the flamekeeper now? Then why is that even a special thing if you can just say “well, you are the flamekeeper now, congratulations”. There is nothing magic about that?!?

        • Titus was created to kill Lexa. That was his sole function. Logic does not apply to the rest of the flamekeeper/conclave/nightblood storyline.

          • Exactly!

            Seriously, why is there only one Flamekeeper? There’s not a trainee at least?
            Where are the guards in the tower? Guns are strictly forbidden in Polis, yet no one came running at the sound of a GUNSHOT?
            Shouldn’t all the natblidas be separated & under guard the night before they BATTLE TO THE DEATH?
            What if all the natblidas die at the conclave?
            I could go on but I don’t want to. None of this shit makes sense. Jroth shoehorned this entire season around the AI/flame/chip idea.

        • Yes, she is the flamekeeper now. Everything he had to do so she could accept this new role was to touch her forehead, like for real, that was it! LOL

          I think there were other flamekeepers before him because he says he served four Commanders but Nicole is absolutely right. Nothing makes sense here. The minute Titus served his purpose plotwise (killing Lexa and making Clarke the flamekeeper) he is killed off because he was never a character to begin with, just a plot device.

    • Lexa had SO MANY apprentices (?) and Titus had NONE.


      I work in childcare and we literally have a list twenty people long who are the “boss” when the boss is way, then when the second boss is away, the next stand in person, next, next, next, next, next, next…

      • They needed Clarke to be the flamekeeper, that’s why Titus didn’t have any apprentices or whatever. That’s S3 in a nutshell. Plot over characters. Nothing exists outside of being a plot device.

  2. The imaginary of a black man being shackled, put on his knees and executed is extremely disturbing and offensive. All the other black men on the show have less than favorable portrayals as well. I also hear Ricky Whittle was treated by pretty terribly by certain people who make the show and that doesn’t help the situation either. Jason Rothenberg just stays taking Ls.

  3. Da fuck.

    It’s like they’re trying one up the irradiation of the Mountain, that is the only thread of “sense” I can find in this.
    Trying for a bigger, nastier gut punch than the killing a whole community.

    • I feel like JRoth’s aspirations got the better of him. There is a total disconnect from the social context.

      • That’s what made the show enjoyable to me.

        Wanton violence in fiction is boring unless it’s a video game and our world has ISIL in it for pete’s sake.

        It shouldn’t be how shocking the death of beloved or innocent character is, it should be the whys and ramifications, the plot first. Not just I want to shock people.

        Even the Red Wedding had definable reasons, both in the books and extra brutally with Talisa on the TV.

        But yes his aspirations outweighed his creativity, ability to plot and integrity if he had any.

        • I agree, shock for the sake of shock does nothing to me.

          I remember in season 1 when this little girl killed Wells I just sat there numb for a few seconds and was like “What just happened?” It was shocking, of course, but did it add anything to the narrative? No. Just another POC murdered for shock value. How very original.

  4. Aww, Karly. It really was so awful. Many were similarly wrecked by it and, I definitely was mad at myself for even hoping this would be different.

    Thanks for the recap. This is the only way I can/will keep up with the show from now on.

  5. So, basically The 100 has stopped trying to be Battlestar Galactica and is now trying to be Game of Thrones. Just endless misery.

    • It’s so blatant how hard they are trying to compete with the bleakness and sensational deaths of shows like Game of Thrones and The Walking Dead. I can just see thought-bubbles over their heads going “Oh, GoT murdered a kid last season. Lets murder all the childrens!” Those two shows have their own history of being problematic when it comes to some of their deaths and the media has called them out on it too. Why would anyone want to mimic that?

      And don’t even get me started on The Vampire Diaries killing two lesbians at once, all Thelma and Louise style. What is The CW’s problem?

      • I can’t even tell you how often I heard the words ‘nobody is save’ coming out of his foul mouth. He is stuck in and with this mantra and doesn’t seem to care about anything else.

      • I think that Rothenberg’s one step away from making this show another Game of Thrones. We all know what GoT’s favorite trend he’s missing, but he’s already gone off the deep end, so, as we say in my country, “what will another stripe do to the tiger?”

        • Since Lexa happened I was wondering how it was possible that no one from the creative team had any objections about this way of storytelling. I mean, executing a POC who is shackled up and on his knees, how can that possibly not send a negative message into the real world considering the current political climate? How the hell did no one realize how fucked up that is?

          And then I read this tweet from Ricky:

          Thank you to the writers whom constantly have their hands tied,they're so talented & wrote some great stories for linctavia in season1— Ricky Whittle (@MrRickyWhittle) April 1, 2016

          • Knowing what we do about how Ricky was bullied right off the show, the way that Lincoln was killed is especially disgusting. I’ll be happy when the truth comes out. Maybe that’ll light a fire under the network’s ass.

      • They cannot complete with the bleakness of a supernatural winter that can last years, skeletal drowned zombie children and frigging magical beings that wage war on life itself.
        Sentient magical beings warring against life itself with an endless army of undead because they make zombies like you and I would make toast.
        Or pop popcorn.

        Just y’all stop you cannot complete that, be your self no body else.

    • I guess this is what happens when you’re chasing Nielsen’s numbers, you go the easy way.

    • I’m so tired of writers learning the wrong lessons from Game of Thrones. It’s deeply problematic in a thousand ways, but to its credit, when its writers say anyone can die, they really mean ***anyone can die.*** Major protagonists, even the straight, white, male ones, get killed off on a near yearly basis.

      But The Walking Dead will never kill Rick. The 100 will never kill Bellamy. Instead, they’ll just keep killing off women and minorities in increasingly horrible ways for the sake of “shock value,” without realizing that the thing that makes GOT so very shocking is NOT the violence, but the sheer audacity of the fact that it keeps killing/torturing/maiming all the pretty whiteboys who we’ve all been conditioned to believe are invincible. There is nothing AT ALL shocking in treating women and minorities as disposable when their lives were never valued as much in the first place.

      (Of course, I think there’s an argument to be made that Game of Thrones’ own writers have completely lost their way by now too, but that’s a rant for a different thread lol.)

      • Oh crap, you’re gonna make me defend TWD!

        Things are better now with Gimple at the reigns than they were in the first few seasons. Minority characters do get a fair shake when it comes to the quality of their stories ( – my fave TWD scene), but… where is Bob now? Minority characters don’t fare so well when it comes to longevity.

        I respectfully disagree that characters are killed off for shock value. The deaths can be shocking, but I think that’s the nature of the beast. I’ve also seen WAY worse in the source material. I can only think of a few deaths that seemed somewhat disrespectful to the characters, but nothing like Lincoln or Lexa’s.

        Now GoT, grrr. It’s slid right down into Torture Porn territory. And the rampant sexual assault, ugh. Why is it that fantasy worlds treat women just as shitty as reality? Definitely says something about whose fantasy we’re dealing with.

      • Great point. “Anyone can die” on GOT means something completely different than it means on The 100, where certain characters will never die.

        I rage quit GOT after the last season. I guess it’s only logical that I’d similarly quit The 100 which apparently is trying to emulate GOT.

      • Not that I want to excuse The 100 — it’s enormously problematic. But they killed off Finn last season too, and he was not only a straight white guy, but part of the core cast from the very first episode.

        • I think the point they are trying to make is that there are certain man on the show that they would never kill like Bellamy. And one straight white guy in the middle of all those minorities characters doesn’t make them like GOT where that happens all the time.

          And because he was a straight white guy he got an honorable death while we got a stray bullet you know, cause life is fragile and who cares if one of the strongest female characters dies in a humiliating way when you think of her role in the show.

          And of course let’s not forget all the white straight guys that were left floundering for representation after Finn was killed.

        • One straight male character dying does not make up for how this show has always treated every single POC character they’ve had since season one. They die at a rate that is disproportionate to that of white characters on the show. And it annoys me that they keep killing off the “good” characters in favor of keeping around problematic characters like Jaha and Pike and even Bellamy at this point. When the only POC you want to keep around are the truly villainous ones, it says a lot.

          Don’t even get me started on what they’ve done to Bellamy this year. I think Jason believes he is writing some amazing redemption storyline but nothing that Bellamy has done this season has made me sympathetic to seeing that. This is of course, all leading to his inevitable reunion with Clarke and I’m gagging at the thought that they put her with a man that helped start a chain reaction that led to the deaths of not only Lexa(a woman the writers claim she truly loved) but so many of her people as well. Bellamy is on some Finn type shit this season and he deserves the same fate Finn got. Why does Bellamy get a redemption arc but Finn had to die? And I hope they don’t excuse his with “Well, technically he was brainwashed by Pike”. I don’t give a fuck who influenced him, he was still willing to participate in genocide.

          • By the life of me, I don’t understand what happened between season 2 and 3. This is not the show I once loved.

  6. Oh, Heather. I relate SO HARD to this. Thank you for writing it down.

    Grief is the right word. Weird and intense and sometimes embarrassing but so very necessary. But that silver lining–the community that’s come together to rage against what’s happening, to rise up and take the power back and to do better with it–it’s a big one. And it will get better, I have to believe.

  7. When I started watching The 100 I really loved the way the showrunners portrayed women; every single female character was strong, fearless and they were running things with such a level of badassery that it was amazing.

    Well, forget about it. This is a “dude-show” now, with all the classic points:

    – The villains are caricatures and cartoonish, we already had an example with Pike now we can add Ontari. Is too much to ask for some freaking context? A half-ass reason as to why people act the way they do? I’m not asking for a Greek tragedy, but, you know, something a little more elaborated than Bellamy’s five minutes girlfriend.

    – Minorities or women are always the evil doers.

    – Clarke now looks like a lost character from that piece of crap Supernatural, everybody is dying around her, but she acts like a freaking stone. This could be a matter of interpretation to anybody else, but this is the way I see it.

    – And the big point is that you have the same circumstances for 2 different characters (Alycia Debnam-Carey and Ricky Whittle leaving the show) but you decided to give the man an honorable dead and the woman, the BLOODY HELL FUCKING COMMANDER, a fucking stray bullet.

    • YES – this is a “dude-show” now! You’re exactly right. But how in the hell did that happen? Think of where we were at the midpoint of season 2:

      2×08 & 2×09 were game-changing episodes. Finn’s death was shocking, but not gratuitous or cheap or lazy. It was a tragic story about how war and violence are insidious, destructive forces that damage the best of us. Clarke being the one to wield the knife made perfect, horrific sense. Finn’s death was a necessary sacrifice at the altar of peace. But Lexa and Lincoln’s deaths were none of these things. They were shocking solely for shock value, not because the logical conclusions of their storylines were tragic in nature. They were gratuitous, lazy, and not worthy of the importance of those characters.

      Also during season 2, women were the driving forces behind the storylines. Now, things happen TO the women that they must to endure. Clarke has been reduced to a diplomat, Abby gave up her role as chancellor, Raven was put on disability, Octavia has been skulking around in the tunnels, and Lexa’s decisions were questioned and undermined at every turn by her male adviser.

      WTF happened? I don’t understand how we went from awesomeness to shit-show in one year.

      • I have no idea what the fuck happened with my favorite show.

        Maybe all the women were cast on another show in another network?

        The end of the world is coming and only Rothenberg knows about it and that’s why he’s moving so fast that nothing makes any sense?

      • JR really loved the comparisons with Game of Thrones and he bought into his own hype. Season 3 is all about shock over characters. Yes, this has always been a brutal show but I also thought this was a hopeful show, a show about what it takes to be a leader, what leadership means in terms of personal sacrifices for the greater good. Even the Mt Weather people were making morally wrong decisions in order to save their people. But season 3 is nothing like that. Pike, Hannah and probably Ontari are cartoonish villains whose motivations we do not understand. How anyone in Arkadia is still supporting Pike? His actions don’t make any sense, his whole plan is dumb. They cannot survive without some kind of relationship with the grounders. They will never win any war with the grounders. Same for Ontari. What does she want exactly besides power? She just an evil girl, that’s it?

        And the messages in season 3 are appalling. Love is definitely a weakness, wanting peace will get you killed, the whole thing about Bellamy and his redemption arc is vomit inducing, he will probably be forgiven and get the girl in the end, the same girl Lexa died for loving. Women are reduced in power or made villains. I have a feeling the last two episodes didn’t really do well in terms of the Bechdel test btw. Why, for instance, Emerson gets to be banished but Lexa and Lincoln “have to die”?

        In the end it seems like The 100 is trying to beat Glee in terms of how fast a show can destroy itself!

        • “In the end it seems like The 100 is trying to beat Glee in terms of how fast a show can destroy itself!”

          Fucking figures that I haven’t been so emotionally invested in a show since Glee’s Season 3… This entire article and the comments are really painful to accept.

    • I remember that one time, when Bellamy’s clusterfuck started, I wrote that people didn’t need reasons to act like assholes. Although my comment may seem like a contradiction, I still think the same.

      The problem here is that you can’t have a bunch of characters, with zero background, acting like assholes without any reason. And for this, this season is the greatest example of lazy writing and one of the stupidest decision I’ve seen in a long time.

    • When I started watching The 100 I really loved the way the showrunners portrayed women; every single female character was strong, fearless and they were running things with such a level of badassery that it was amazing.

      I totally agree. I have to admit, I hopped on the train only very late in the game. I watched the first few episodes when the show premiered its first season and I wasn’t sold. I liked the premise, but the whole Bellamy-Murphy thing really annoyed me. Then I got wind of Lexa being introduced as a gay character so I gave in to my lesbian urge and watched her scenes on youtube. And only after Lexa was killed off I felt I needed more context so I watched seasons 1 and 2 in like three days or something.

      They way they portrayed all these powerful women was really surprising to me. I was always waiting for some of the men to doubt their leadership for instance but that never happened. That was sooo refreshing to see. And so it kind of surprised me to hear how they fucked everything up in season 3. I mean, those are the same writers after all.

      And really, what I am sad about the most is that they had such a huge opportunity on their hands. A few years from now nobody is going to remember some stupid A.I. storyline, but imagine they had managed to keep Lexa and lo and behold, even make them endgame? This could have been the way the show would be remembered.

      • Yes! That’s so true, I never thought of it that way. An AI storyline will definitely be forgotten and this show will be just another show in history. But a show with the first main characters who are strong women in a relationship together. Now that would’ve made this a very memorable show.

  8. (Warning: this is from the point of view of someone that hasn’t seen The 100 but gets extensive recaps from her now very sad lesbian friends.)

    Jason wants The 100 to be Game of Thrones sooo baaaad. “Yes, Game of Thrones is successful because it kills people, that must be it!” Very classy, killing off your lesbian character and then having almost everyone she loves die at her funeral. That’ll definitely win your fans back. And as always, no respect for POC characters given. Killing off a peaceful black male character by having him be unarmed, shackled, then shot in the head and left to bleed out in the mud? No words…my condolences to everyone who used to enjoy watching this show that is now miserable because a certain man thinks that playing with his viewer’s emotions and making them cry is a sign that he’s a good writer.

    • “my condolences to everyone who used to enjoy watching this show that is now miserable because a certain man thinks that playing with his viewer’s emotions and making them cry is a sign that he’s a good writer.”

      Thankfully I never got into the 100, but this reminds me of so much other media that kills off lesbians and bi women. Like the absolute WORST stuff has to happen to us to get through the thick skin of the male audience so they can feel something.

      Meanwhile all the lesbians and bi women who see ourselves in the characters are utterly fucking destroyed, because of course we care about the characters. Why else would we watch basically anything that we can find with them in it?

      • Please stop saying that lesbians are “destroyed” by this very unfortunate story line. I was late to watching the 100 but was impressed by some of the moral questions raised in season 1 & 2. From the beginning season 3 seemed like a different show with a much less compelling direction. The whole AI thing was boring and the Pike story was just plain stupid. I am glad I had pretty much decided none of it was worth my time. And it’s not. My question for one and all is “why are you still watching,caring, thinking about a show that so clearly has gone in the crapper?” I’m sorry Lexa got done in but nothing this asshole does is ever going to destroy me. Change the channel or better yet go have a coffee with a friend. I do understand how and why people are so pissed off about this but the point of any show is viewership so at least deny them that. Because they don’t deserve us and they certainly don’t deserve the ego puffing of thinking they can “destroy” people with their uninspired, hack storytelling.

        • I don’t agree. First off, many people who have been hurt stopped watching. Second, have you ever managed to stop caring and thinking about something that gave you so much pain or just in general just because you wanted to? Seems like an unhealthy coping mechanism when you simply suppress your feelings.

          You make it sound like the solution is to simply stop watching. But that doesn’t take away the feelings. I agree, if you have a hard time coping you should not put yourself in a position where they can possibly hurt you even more. However, what’s done is done.

          Also, you can’t judge whether people are being destroyed by that or not. You are not them. Sorry if this sounds harsh, but I just don’t like people telling other people how to feel.

    • Unless a show killed off a Ned Stark type character in the first season, it will never touch GOT. Also, do they have dragons?

  9. I hear you, Lexa’s death was brutal, and not only in a personal way but it’s certainly a big loss for the community in terms of representation. After what the show did to Lincoln this week there is just no redeeming itself for me. I will not tune in to watch that show ever again.

    At this point I’m just so damn tired of watching myself die onscreen. We’ve lost 10 lesbian/bisexual characters already this year, and 4 of them have occurred on The CW network. The “bury your gays” trope needs to end, it is disgusting and harmful to a already vulnerable community. It’s so so important that we keep fighting for better treatment of minorities in the media.

        • Trish Bendix put out a tweet saying that she was sent a screener of a returning show where two lesbians are killed. After TVD killed Nora and Mary-Louise everyone asked her if this was the show she was talking about. She said no, that the show she was referring to will air next week.

          • that’s bad. I’m trying to figure out which show has 2 queer women left to kill- OITNB isn’t coming back until June, Wentworth and POI in May… F#$# if it’s Orphan Black. but she didnt do AE’s recaps for it. ugh.

          • If she’s talking about Orphan Black there will be hell to pay, mark my words. And by the way, she’s playing guessing games with this? Are you kidding me?

            Ok, wait, with the queerbating crap that AE’s recaping all the time I need to think about this.

          • @Freakazoid:
            yeah, def hell to pay if it is OB. not like OB could kill Cosima and blame TM’s new job.

          • you know what guys, I had a thought. maybe it’s Empire, Mimi Whiteman is secretly TWO identical twin lesbians, and they’re both gonna die. gotta be the least upsetting Lesbian Double Death Configuration.

          • No, not Orphan Black. Please no. If even OB is doing this, I’m gonna lose faith altogether.

            I’ve also heard that it’s Empire. I don’t really care for Mimi, I thought her storyline was awful, but it still would be horrible to have another addition to the death count.

            I am wondering, was there a secret meeting of all the writers and showrunners where they came up with the grand plan to all kill off their lesbians?

          • Well if Mimi Whiteman is one of the characters this will be another Jenny Schecter case. Not a lot of mourning there.

  10. I felt so stupid for being so upset about Lexa. It was actual grief i was feeling and was wondering if it was a sympton of having no life. Then i talked to other people on the internet who were even more upset and what was even more surprising to me people who were angry.I could feel competely jusified in how i felt about this fictional character.

    • I think a lot of us wondered what was wrong with us because of how intensely we reacted to her death. I was in a fog for 3 days, totally in shock. On day 3 when Kim Shumway finally confirmed that this wasn’t a trick and yes, Lexa was truly dead, I fully lost my shit.

      And you’re right: it was grief we were feeling, and it was just as real as if it were someone we know IRL. I am still recovering and still have good days and bad days.

      I will never forgive JRot for taking my favorite show and my favorite characters and fucking them all to hell. Add the bigger picture and it’s just a clusterfrak of epic proportions.

      • I had no more than 2 or 3 hours sleep per night after Lexa was killed and the funny thing is I totally didn’t connect the dots.

        Then last Wednesday it was particularly bad when my mind just wouldn’t shut off. I switched between trying to let sleep claim me and checking on Twitter (I am in CEST so for me at night Twitter is like a carnival) until 5 in the morning. The whole time I was wondering why I couldn’t sleep when I usually don’t have a problem with that at all. And then it hit me that this started the day Lexa died. I didn’t even watch the whole series before, I was not baited and betrayed like so many and I am also not in my teens and it still affected me so badly I can’t even explain.

        • Wow. Same here – 3 or 4 hrs sleep per night for a month. If I actually try to fall asleep, my mind just settles on images of Lexa dying, and I just cry myself out. So instead I stay awake & check twitter & tumblr until I literally pass out. If I had a bad night, I’ll listen to the Televerse podcast while I get ready & cook breakfast & take the kids to school. It seems so ridiculous! I can’t really explain it.

          I’ve been thinking of putting together a comprehensive poll to gather data on the physical & emotional effects that Lexa’s death has had on us. It’s so widespread, through all age groups, and whether or not we were involved in the fandom beforehand. And most of us seem to be surprised with how deeply we were hurt, and with how long that hurt is hanging on.

          • That’s exactly it. You think it can’t possible affect you that much because you are not one of those vulnerable teens dealing with so much shit in their lives and then given hope over and over again. I can’t even imagine how horrible they must feel.

          • I think your idea about a poll is a really good and important one. I fully support this endeavor.

    • also: are you going to keep writing recaps for the show? i know there’s still clarke and she’s not nothing, but ugghhh i feel like the show doesn’t deserve our attention or enough respect for it to be written about after all this mess

      • I go back and forth about this every day! I’m not sure yet. I’m definitely covering the finale though.

        • This is the end for me, so much crap is going around in the world that I can’t deal with this show anymore. I don’t want some crappy bubblegum show, but this is toó much.

          • Everything I’ve read about what is supposedly going to happen in the finale definitely makes me not want to watch. Scratch that. I’m NOT going to watch but I’m sure their will be a shitstorm about it on social media right after it airs if those spoilers turn out to be true. Now that, I will pull up a chair for.

          • Jea, I won’t watch either. I have not enough imagination for there to be hope that it is not going to result in heartbreak all over again.

  11. Yeah, the 100, uh wow.
    This was way,way too gory and I concur with the Game of Thrones comments.
    However, I do like that a large part of the plot still revolves around Lexa without having to have ADC on screen.
    Clarke as the flamekeeper was a cool twist and I can’t wait to meet Luna.
    Also:Clarke&Murphy: Win.
    Lincoln’s death was so unnecessary, though and way,way too graphic.
    This season really isn’t about survival anymore, it’s just bleak as hell with little redemption.
    Also Kane is definitely the cockroach of this show. That guy survives absolutely everything.

    • However, I do like that a large part of the plot still revolves around Lexa without having to have ADC on screen.

      I can’t decide whether that’s a good or a bad thing.

  12. Let me get this straight. First they kill Lexa. Then, two episodes later, they kill all but two of the nightbloods (one of whom was the murderer), Titus, and Lincoln? I was considering going back to the show just because there are so few with bisexual main characters, but it’s like this guy is deliberately trying to be awful.

  13. Stealing Fire – I don’t even know where to begin. All the nightblood children who loved Lexa, whom Lexa loved, were slaughtered in their sleep. Right after Clarke and Aden shared a rather touching moment that would have sat well had more needless violence not overshadowed it. I thought the point of this season and Lexa’s death was to world build and show the conclave, show how a Commander comes into power…now that all the nightbloods are dead, I feel like the audience loses out on such an important aspect of grounder politics.

    Then Titus constantly blaming and attacking Clarke only to make her the new Flamekeeper…okay.

    The plot holes this season are killing the logical part of my brain.

    And Lincoln’s death…it hurts twofold because we know Ricky Whittle was bullied by the showrunner and was forced to quit the show, but Jason’s choice to have Lincoln on his knees, shackled, in the mud, shot in the head, by an authority figure, all because he was trying to help his people escape…well, it’s reminiscent of how black men today, right now are being killed by figures of authority; it screams the black lives matter movement, and it nails the show as being ridiculously and inherently racist. Lincoln was also in an interracial relationship with Octavia and she had to watch him die…how did Jason sign off on this episode.

    It’s quite gross when you consider this white man in power who was bullying Ricky Whittle chose to kill his black character off in such a disturbing manner – also sensationalizing it by doing it in slow motion, getting graphic with the bullet going through his head and having him bleed out, dead on the ground. Not to mention…Lincoln is basically put down by Pike in front of everyone at Arkadia.

    People watch this show, their worlds are influenced by what they see, and this is the kind of racist visual that’s being put out there. For claiming to be all about diversity, The 100 is becoming one of the biggest shams I have ever had the displeasure of watching.

  14. I read on tumblr something along the lines of, “Rottenberg wants to show that life is precious. He thinks queer folk dont know this? poc?” this show, the actors, the characters, it all could have been so good, you know? i’m speechless with whatever this is.

    really, really sad to hear how traumatic these past few days have been for you. that you were dreading watching this, what could happen when you did and you watched it anyway,….saying thank you for the recap doesnt sound like enough.

    if it helps, swedens pbs covered LGBT Fans Deserve Better


    • Rottenberg wants to show that life is precious.

      This is the most stupid thing I have ever seen. It just goes to show how disconnected this man is from societal issues we are dealing with.

  15. I named my Stardew Valley character Lexa. She lives on Griffin farm. Her favourite thing is “Clarke”. I’m fine.

    • Is Lexa going to let one of the lovely ladies of Stardew Valley heal her broken heart? Or is she going to channel her pain into her farm and stay single to the end of her days?

  16. Is there a new category in the Emmys? I don’t know, maybe a “killing lesbians and bisexuals” award?

    Because clearly the CW is winning by a landslide.

    • I have to say, wouldn’t it be time for the CW to speak out about this whole mess?

      I mean, the only one that really cared about the heartbroken fans was Javi, who for days did nothing else but connect with them via his tumblr. I think Kim was the one who tweeted suicide hotlines on twitter and answered a few question.
      But the only response officially aimed at fans came from Rothenberg and I think we all have a not so favorable opinion on that.

      So why is it that the CW keeps their mouth shut? Is it a common PR technique to wait until the storm has blown over? Someone please enlighten why it would make sense for the CW to behave the way they do.

  17. I felt exactly like you did after that episode. My wife and I, who are 37 and 30 respectively, enjoy tv but never really get into fanfic, etc. this death really threw us and we were both in a haze that weekend. We were so upset and frazzled by it for over a week. And I tried to talk with my coworkers about it but it’s hard to understand when you’re represented everywhere on tv. Thanks for the great recap.

  18. I’ve been too embarrassed to admit this because it was all because of a fictional character…
    After 307 I took a nose dive into the worst depressive episode I’ve had in about 5 yrs. I felt dead. The world around me sounded muffled like when you walk outside after a snowstorm. Friday at work I was on the verge of tears all day and ended up hiding in a conference room most of the day. Saturday and Sunday I walked around like a zombie. I had a drink for the first time in 3 years and then realized what was going on. I was ashamed that as a fucking adult my mental stability was knocked off kilter by a fictional character. By Wednesday my mom called me because I missed our weekly checkin and she knew I was broken. I lost it on the phone and scared the crap out of her. She’s only seen me cry a handful of times in the last 10 years and I was sobbing out of control. She helped me process and I forced myself to take the necessary steps to pull myself out of the darkness. I allowed myself to believe and much like Icarus I flew too close to the sun and got burned.
    I’ve never dreaded an episode of tv more in my life than I did stealing fire and rightfully so. Childers were murdered in their sleep for being compassionate. Lincoln was assassinated for caring. JRoth wants to show how life is precious? It doesn’t look like it. If there’s no visible light at the end of the tunnel what do you have to keep yourself fighting? We open ourselves up to stories to discover unknown truths about who we are. Storytellers have a responsibility to their audience and JRoth fails at every turn. Ignorance isn’t an excuse. In fact he taught us that when Clarke met Anya on that bridge and learned they unintentionally started a war burning a grounder village to the ground with their flairs. They didn’t know but that didn’t excuse their crimes.
    Sorry, that ended up being a really long ramble rant.

    • Thanks for sharing. And don’t feel embarrassed or ashamed! This was done to us: we were manipulated. We trusted this creator to do what he said he was going to do. No matter your age (I’m 26), we still open our hearts to these characters and that’s never a bad thing. Don’t feel embarrassed.

  19. Thanks for sharing your experience, Heather. Since Thirteen aired, I’ve also experienced a significant increase in anxiety, and a fair amount of depression in the week following Lexa’s death. It really brought back a lot of negative feelings I felt as a teenager, which felt so ridiculous, since I’m almost 28, you know? It helps knowing I’m not alone.

    Going to watch this episode tonight. Knowing what happens ahead of time will help me through it, I hope.

    Ste yuj.

    • It’s the only episode of The 100 I’ve been spoiled on. I purposely read spoilers and it did help. Sort of like putting on armor before battle.

  20. Thank you for this recap and for sharing your story. Adding my name to the list of people who were surprised at how viscerally upsetting Thirteen was for me, and how much my sadness and anger stuck with me. It actually made me realize how much I need in life in person queer community, so I’ve been focusing a lot on making that happen.

    I don’t think I can watch the show any more — it’s gone over the edge from cathartic angst to desolation angst, and I’m too busy to make room for Thursday evening desolation. I’ll definitely be following the recaps, though, because I still care so much about Clarke and want to check in on her (and also because I find it really hard to look away from metaphorical train wrecks.)

  21. I never watched The 100 until after Lexa died and I was still devastated. I just couldn’t believe it kept happening, and that that other lesbian media site was not as rigorous in questioning the death of lesbians on tv as it was before. I mean, where are we supposed to go if we don’t get coverage from a site that professes to play for our team? So I continue to grieve for those two things – for Lexa and that site. I thank Heather for her tweets during those confusing days. Im glad I followed her here.

    The 100 has lost viewership since episode “Thirteen.” It got some back with the latest episode but still far from where it was ratings-wise at the beginning of the season. I don’t wish the cast and crew any ill will – I put this whole debacle squarely on Jason’s shoulders. But there is something to be said if a show posted a -12% change in viewership in less than a month, and the boss of the show lost over 15 thousand twitter followers in less than 10 days.

  22. So how long until all the episodes of all the shows with LGBT characters filmed before Lexa’s death have aired? Like do you think all the showrunners planning LGBT deaths just sat around praising their own genius and originality until Lexa happened and Bury Your Gays gained mainstream attention? And now they’re just like “well shit”, but there’s nothing they can do to stop their impending train wreck?

    • Probably that’s gonna happen and maybe next year all the showrunners will have another brilliant idea and play a Gotham/Renee Montoya stunt on every freaking show.

  23. Yeah, I’m sorry but you referring to your feelings about Lexa’s death as “grief,” saying that you understand that grief is not stages but rather continuous cycles is so deeply offensive. Please don’t act like you know what “grief”is just because you watch a tv show where a character died, it’s honestly terrible to say that when you clearly don’t know what grief actually is.

    • Look, fictional characters engage us emotionally, we form parapersonal relationships and they affect us.
      With Lexa it was also the belief that things could finally be better, the hope for finally having a leading lesbian couple without resorting to tired tropes, that passed.
      A lot of us loved her a little bit.
      Because we felt we could.
      So, yes, the reaction is, actually, strangely enough, grief.
      Of course it is not like losing an actual person, I’ve always found the English word “to be bereft” the most befitting there.
      I think, what a lot of people were so startled by, was their intense and visceral reaction to the death of a fictional character.
      It won’t be as intense and as long lasting as a real person’s passing, but it’s there, like a shadow of the real thing, and it’s still valid.
      I’m sorry for your loss and that you’re hurting.

    • You ever hear the song ‘Walk Away Renee’? You should go take a listen, and dont let the door hit ya on the way out.

    • amidola covered what I was going to say pretty well, but I’ll also add – you’re talking to the queer community right now, you think we’ve never experienced grief before, in real life?! please take a minute to think about what you’ve said and what motivated you to come into a place where people are clearly, truly hurting to say it.

    • Renee, I agree with what amidola said and wouldn’t assume that the writer of this article or any of the commenters haven’t experienced grief much greater than the loss of Lexa simply because they chose the same word to describe different circumstances.

      But I suspect that if you are reacting so strongly to the use of the word, then you either have experienced or are currently experiencing some very painful grief. I’m sending good thoughts your way, which isn’t much but it’s all I can offer.

    • We are humans, most of whom have likely dealt with many actual deaths and losses. Spare us the lecture on what grief is, because we know. We are allowed to define our own feelings without being told our feelings are invalid.

      I’m 44 years old. If you think I haven’t experienced enough life and loss to understand what grief is, you’re way off base. No one here is saying it’s the same level of grief equivalent to the loss of a real person, but Lexa’s death triggered a lot of memories of loss and hurt and anger that for many people actually is tied to very real personal situations.

      Your dismissiveness toward people who are sharing their pain is noted. You might want to think about how shitty and mean that really is.

    • I think most of the grief is actually coming from the loss of hope.

      The way the crew of The 100 interacted with the fanbase concerning Lexa lulled everyone into a false sense of security, and a lot of people were tricked into believing that this straight, white male showrunner was actively going out of his way to be different. He claimed to be ‘progressive’, he claimed to be listening to all the young women who opened up to him about their past experiences with L/B characters, and he promised he would reward our trust and loyalty with good representation. As a result the show was praised as ‘groundbreaking’ by the online LGBT community, and was given a TON of free publicity thanks to these young fans (I, along with many others, only started watching as a result of all the ‘clexa’ gifs on tumblr, coupled with the high amount of praise the show was being given).

      Lexa life was a promise. That promise was like a drug that kept this loyal fanbase busy promoting the show, and then the rug was pulled so viciously from under them.

      Lexa’s death was a reminder that we live in a world where we are considered by the mainstream as nothing but disposable secondary characters who are meant to suffer and die, and that our love is not as significant as the love that exists between men and women. Where our lives, sexuality, suffering, and dying are only relevant when furthering the plot of another character (in this case a character who will undoubtedly go back to being with a male – probably the male character who will get redemption even after executing 300 allied soldiers in their sleep).

      My grieving, at least, was not for Lexa – rather for the hope that Lexa embodied.

  24. Thank you for this recap. I too had an intense depressive episode after ‘thirteen’. I was in bed and crying a lot for several days in a row, surprised and trying to think of the last character that I cared about this much and honestly coming up blank. No to nearly the same degree, but I’m also pretty upset about Nora and Mary Louise on the vampire Diaries last night. I’m grateful for the ability to see other people processing here, for the support around all of this I’ve found online, and the visibility and donations the community has achieved.

  25. Lincoln was killed in public, shackled for trying to escape.

    Seriously, Rothenberg, we already understood that this is a narrative of colonisation. You didn’t have to go all-out on the horrifying visual to get that across.

    And just like with Lexa, he’d just hide behind things like “but there are other POC on the show” and “anyone can die” and “we’re so diverse!” if ever cornered on it.


    At least Lincoln got a bit of agency with his death. But that’s not saying a lot. Titus did too. EFF it all.

  26. Karly, thank you for your article. (sorry for my english, not native)

    I grew up with tv shows who had more animals in leading roles then women (no offense to Boomer, Black beauty, Flipper, … you where great as well) but there was no such thing as LGBT characters, no one to compare with.
    Now (30 years later) I’m happily married to my girlfriend, we have the cats, great job, … the full package. And for one moment, out of the blue, I’m emotionally blown away by a tv show, by the death of a character (cried like a baby). Ashamed for what I felt, the sadness, trying to explain to friends.
    I realize now that no matter how old you are, if your alone or not, you long for representation.
    It’s good to know that I’m not alone with this grief, that there are so many like me.

    Thank you for fighting, all the way to Belgium. Ste yuj.

  27. Ricky is going to be opening up about the bullying that went on for him on set when he was playing Lincoln over the next few days on twitter.

    I saw this on tumblr ( and am posting re: Lincoln’s death.

    Now let’s talk about how minorities die on this show :


    Got repeatedly stabbed over nothing
    for the sake of shock value
    Got 5 seconds to die
    no last words.
    Before his death barely got any screen time.
    His death wasn’t even about himself
    No emotional moment


    A bullet
    died in the fucking mud
    got 5 second to die
    no last words
    Her death was only there for shock value
    no emotional moment
    wasn’t even mentioned after


    died for wanting peace
    Was executed

    They are the one who deserved better. Now let’s talk about Lexa :

    She got an extremely long unrealistic death
    she had the chance to say goodbye
    got an emotional death
    got plenty of screen time before that
    Had a funeral
    she’s constantly mentioned since then


    Lexa was used as a plot device just as Titus was. (I have a HUGE problem with Lexa’s death as well, just thought it would provide something to think about in regards to how racist this show is.)

    Also, Finn had a really drawn out death, is mentioned constantly, etc, etc, had his ashes carried around forever.

    Anya has been possibly my most favourite character out of the whole show and I couldn’t believe how quickly they just got rid of her too and it’s like she didn’t even exist? Also, there was no mention of them taking the chip from her and putting it into Lexa? Anya wouldn’t have had the rituals done.


    Also, the way Titus died and Lincoln died in this episode. I felt so sick watching it. Why am I still watching it?

    • oh gosh i read the Ricky thing on here. I thought I read it somewhere else.


    • Just took a look at that blog. That came from a Bellarke. While I completely agree where it relates to those POC deaths, they don’t give a shit about Lexa or what her death meant in terms of the negative impact it’s had on Lesbian representation. The post itself was a response to an anon who questioned previous statements by that person about Lexa’s death. Just wanted to put that out there.

      When it comes to the 100 fandom in general, it baffles me that they are just now railing against how POC have been treated on the show or point out how Ricky was treated badly by Jason but still turn around and defend Jason and the show on social media when it comes to it’s crappy LGBT representation and people wanting to boycott it in general. The racism on this show has gone on for 3 seasons without improvement. The POC characters are always made to suffer and/or die . The bisexual lead is constantly put through trauma after trauma but I guess her very existence is enough for some people. The gay couple don’t get near enough screentime and development IMO. And their token lesbian is dead. All these things should be enough to want to be done with this show or at least publicly hold the writers accountable but nope. They are going to keep watching because their ship might happen and that trumps everything it seems so everyone else just shut the fuck I guess.

      I quit The Vampire Diaries back at the beginning of S3 for the exact shame shit that I see is going on with The 100 and never looked back. Same with Teen Wolf. You can’t pat yourself on the back for how diverse your cast is when you just turn around and kill off those characters every chance you get and pull the “Everyone can die!!!!” excuse when you get called out on it. Also, beware of writers who boast that their own writing is “brilliant”. That kind of narcissist is never going to listen to constructive criticism and actually apply it to their work.

      • I hadn’t looked at their blog, was just searching through the 100 tag and thought that the comparison of how a lot of the characters died really highlighted more of the racism in the show. Even in the death scenes they are treated poorly.

        Someone further up in the comments really nailed it. It’s a straight, white guy show now.

        • I saw this too and the points re: POC are completely valid. It’s a shame they had to pit it as Lexa v. POC deaths which matters? when they can both be important and stem from different issues and we can care about both.

          • That’s what I keep hearing everywhere. Trying to divide between POC and LGBT issues. As so many before me said: It’s not a competition.

            Stop attacking people for caring about Lexa death based on your assumption that they didn’t care about POC before.

      • Fandom wars are the worst. It makes you constantly check everything people say because someone may make a good point but then it turns out they only made it to insult a character or pairing you like. People could be fighting together against their common enemy (or enemies, because at this point the network itself should be held accountable), but instead they spend more time trying to sabotage other people’s efforts because they’re on opposite sides of a ship war. It’s messy.

        Similarly, you’ll sometimes find arguments that not wanting Bellarke to happen is biphobic. But let’s be clear, the people making this argument don’t give a shit about bisexual representation. These are the same people who go through some impressive mental gymnastics to try to prove that Clarke is straight.

        • I don’t believe they really care about Bisexual representation either. These same people were frothing at the mouth with rage when they first heard that Clarke was going to have a sex scene with a woman because “it’s fetishizing” but now they think boycotting the show of Lexa is “bullying”. These same people were quiet as church mice about all the racism of the past 3 seasons until it was convenient for them to go “Oh, you care about Lexa dying well what about the racism on the show?” I don’t know. You tell me because nobody wanted to speak up before and they STILL don’t want to truly hold Jason responsible. All of their complaining is CLexa related instead of contributing to the voices who want change and it pisses me off that they are trying to make this some kind of competition of racism vs homophobia and which is more important. It doesn’t help that one of the biggest LGBT websites in the world basically backed them up by writing a scathing article addressed specifically to Clexa fans chastising them for this very thing. I’m still pissed at Afterellen for doing that.

          • I’ve seen some people (including QPOC) say that they’ve been trying from early on to call attention to the racism, but they were either ignored or silenced until recently. From their point of view, it must be really infuriating to see people suddenly becoming passionate about a cause now that it fits into their larger plan of bringing down show and showrunner, when just a few weeks ago they were saying that Ricky Whittle was an asshole for badmouthing his boss. But yeah, people are dismissing other marginalized groups to make their point and some are pretending to care to make the opposite faction look bad and it’s painful to witness.

            At this point I really don’t understand anyone who is aware of the situation and still supports Rothenberg. Apart from the Bellarke fandom I’m not sure who still trusts him. As you said, they really want their ship to happen. Because it’s not as if they can open any post-apocalyptic YA novel and find a similar love story, right? And they don’t seem to care that everyone involved with the show spent months (years?) all but insulting them and just changed their tune in the past few weeks to win them back. I’d be offended if I were them.

        • Yessss, common enemy. (Y)

          I regret posting something that was fandom related/had just seen it as contrasting the circumstances post death.

          Going to stop checking replies because feeling really anxious.

          Sorry for hitting people right in the feels.

  28. Didn’t realize there’d be a spoiler about TVD! Oh man. This episode is going to be so tough to watch now that I know…

  29. *edit-full disclosure: this is rather long.i wanted to just quickly comment but there was no friend with confused ‘i don’t get it’look to interupt and i guess after 4 weeks of frustration and disappointment i needed to went*

    oh my,this show. what a mess.i can’t even…

    the sad thing is i liked the show..i was not in it for clexa. i have ditched it after watching the pilot, binged it between the seasons after hearing good things about it and loved the 2 season. them introducing lexa, revealing her as gay and clark bi was just bonus. i did not ship it (i’m completaly happy to have the end of the world served without the romance) and i loved it for what it was- post-apocalyptic sy-fi full of badass ladies..unheard-of!!

    they even killed ever boring Finn and Bellamy stopped being total d**k for about 5 min…

    i was sure they gonna kill lexa by end of 2nd season and when they didn’t and announced the ADC is coming back i was happy and content to see how this plays out, knowing they will have to write her off the show eventually.

    when 3 season, the moment they began to play up the romance i knew they gonna kill her. like i said i don’t do ships, don’t follow the fandom or spoilers so i had no idea about the communication between the showrunners and writers with the fandom but in my mind there was NO WAY there’s gonna be same sex female couple running the post-ap world. NO WAY!! so i made my peace with it, kept watching and refused to get emotionally involved.

    but then 307 happened and half way through the episode i have boarded the ship and by end of it i was crying like a baby. my straight best friend was laughing, telling me that only sucker can board a Titanic after it hits the iceberg.. i was sad and i was pissed. usually the best cure is avoidance and time but that wasn’t really an option this time as long as i went online. so i have followed the reactions, read up on the prior communication between the people from the show and the fandom (the level of queerbaiting was ridiculous), i even finally sign up for a twitter account so i could keep up with this shitstorm.

    And it’s been fascinating to say the least. people finally talking about the tropes we so used to is refreshing and the fandom fundraiser for trevor makes me proud.

    The interesting thing i have noticed is that there’s so many people angry but they can’t seem to agree on what about. i have realized that while trying to explain to my straight friend why there’s such fallout because she didn’t get it. i went through the numbers, dead lesbian trope, death after love scene, stray bullet, queerbaiting,etc.. and after multiple ‘but it’s not just that…it’s..’ she looked confused and i got frustated by my inability to pinpoint the reason for the anger. not just of the fandom but my own. because i was bothered by this much more then i usually am, it’s been weeks. was it because they killed her, because they worked so hard to make me care before they did or the way it was done? or was it just one to many lesbians dead? i didn’t know why this pushed my button so much.

    and then i’ve realized it pushed all of them. i have remembered helping my friend’s daughter with her homework, we were sitting around the table discussing the sinking of Titanic and who was ultimately at fault. and everybody agreed that it was the captain but as with every big accident you need multiple smaller f..k ups pilling up to get to the disaster. and that’s exactly what Jason Rothenberg and the 100 writers did. dead lesbian-check, new level of queerbaiting-check, sex scene followed by stray bullet-check and check..
    i haven’t realized how accurate her cheeky Titanic analogy was.

    And now Lincoln…have seen it coming from mile away but the way it was done, etc..i can’t even…it took me weeks to process lexa and this is gonna take some time too. especially if the spoilers/rumors about other cast member exiting/dying because of being on other show prove to be right..

    Anyway it seems that i really did board titanic. but it wasn’t month ago but 2 years ago. and it isn’t called clexa but The 100. and considering the season is written and shot we can only guess how many more holes had cpt.rothenberg already made…

    And am i the only one who was really looking forward to seeing how the whole conclave/ascension thing suppose to go. they never really made clear if they gonna fight to death or was always said that commander’s spirit is gonna choose.. i was kinda hoping they may skip the obvious fight- strongest kills the others for maybe the chip really choosing somehow…i guess the writers are on lazy spiral and decided to skip it al together. that’s for the promised backround into grounders tradition and off wee go to jaha storyline…

    • my straight best friend was laughing, telling me that only sucker can board a Titanic after it hits the iceberg..

      Oh my god, this analogy is golden.

  30. Heartfelt and heart-breaking, too. I echo your sentiments entirely. Ste yuj, Karly! Really so devastating and this article’s spot on, too. You’re so right about hope. Have a dark show–fine–nobody’s saying darkness is bad. But if there’s no hope to pull you from the abyss; no light to guide you in the dark–what’s the point? What’s the point in pulling shock value after shock value if it ain’t shocking anymore?

    Wish you all the very best, Karly. X

  31. Can somebody please take down the other comment from Lucas? It is a response to Rachel W. and it’s offensive as hell.

  32. Finally got around to watching this episode. The deaths of Titus and Lincoln were pretty graphic by the shows standards. Lincoln’s death was so purposeless. I can’t say I will stop watching, but I really hope the creators and showrunners feel the gravity of what they’ve done. Even when Clarke and Lexa were not a couple on the show, they were the reason I watched.

  33. I came to The 100 before Clarke and Lexa got together, and honestly, there were other characters who felt more compelling for me. Like when I first saw Indra, before we met Lexa, I thought she was in charge, and she seemed like she was going to be a super interesting character — but then it turned out the young white girl was in charge, and Adina Porter was pretty underused on the show (imo). Then there was scrappy little Octavia defying her dick of a brother and getting to know Lincoln before they could even really communicate with each other. And then there were Lexa and Clarke, like the cherry on top.

    My main problem with the 100 at this point is that there is the potential for SO MANY STORYLINES I would find super interesting, but instead they are just going for this epic war Game-of-Thrones knockoff kind of thing. They didn’t just kill Lexa, they killed all of their interesting storylines. Yes, a post-apocalyptic world would have lots of politics and bloody power struggles. But it would also have OTHER STUFF.

    I’m glad Lexa’s death started a conversation in the mainstream media about Bury Your Gays. I agree that it’s bullshit. I’m not surprised their deaths resonated so heavily with so many of us, and I hope that showrunners are sitting up and taking notice. While I don’t really share the community’s grief, I do get it.

    But also, like, it’s just not a very good show. But it does inspire me to want to run out and write some better apocalypse fiction! :-D

    PS: Clarke, I know shit’s rough right now, but maybe take a shower?

      • LOL.

        @queergirl makes a very good point here. Characters are what drives a story! You can have all the plot twists and big reveals you want, and if no one gives a shit about your characters or you destroy all the favorite characters (or even just too many) in the process, people will tune out.

        • I agree, in one way or another at the core of every show is a relationship, romantic or otherwise.

    • Hey it’s a post-apocalypse world !
      It’s “Clarke, I know shit’s rough right now, but maybe take a sponge bath?”

  34. I just watched an interview with Ricky Whittle where he said that Lincoln was supposed to have a longer story this season but after he told Rothenberg he was leaving the show Rothenberg just had Lincoln die in the next script that came out rather than go through to the end of the season. He was originally supposed to just escape with the others.

    So, it is true that Whittle chose to leave show (and good for him, American Gods is a major step up for his career!) so they couldn’t keep him around forever. But he could have/would have finished this season. It’s infuriating to know the sudden, useless, graphic death was just so damn petty. He didn’t even do it because he thought it was absolutely necessary or such a great story. Sigh.

    • OMG I just watched the podcast and i’m so glad he got out. This shit is insane, I’d hear he (and Lindsey Morgan I think?) had had a difficult time on set but this is ridiculous.

  35. I love this article’s note on online friendships. You are all mighty friends in tough times.

    This show refuses to give happy endings. That’s been oddly comforting for me. I can’t stomach war movies or LOTR where thousands of people die but hey, pretty actors, happy ending, safe camera angles so that you don’t feel it too much.

    On The 100, each death actually touched me personally – the more senseless the death, the more it made me appreciate human life. I’ll take that over a Hollywood ending any day.

    A 16yo family pet died yesterday. I grieved. Some people said: “It’s just a dog. Not even YOUR dog.” Other people said: “He’s in doggy Heaven now!” Their well-intentioned comments reminded me of the world’s reaction to our Lexa grief. Sure she’s a TV character, and sure, this life isn’t the end, but loss of life deserves a response every single time. Lexa meant something to our community. We have lost too many young people like her. We cannot afford to be cavalier about death.

    Death can’t be sewn up in a happy ending, as it usually is on TV. That’s why I’m drawn to this show despite its faults, and that’s also why I’m grateful for all of you creating a community to heal from it. You matter.

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