Tag Yourself in This SNL Lesbian Reality Show

feature image via youtube

This week’s Saturday Night Live debuted the lesbian answer to Logo’s actual and upcoming drama-filled reality show that follows six gay men during a summer-long, gay-mecca beach party. Fire Island, meet Cherry Grove, the affluent-lesbian-with-child silent retreat. (Careful with this one, finding this offensive would make you the exact kind of person it’s parodying.)

These tropes that package gay women into overly emotional bores and gay men into hot beds of fun have been very, very, very well established to a point that could be classified as tired, and the queer landscape has changed so much even in the past five years that this really feels like the last year you’re going to be able to get away with something like this without calling attention to the fact that you haven’t met a gay person below the age of 30 in a decade, but in the meantime, who are we here?

I’m Beth, the lesbian that no one seems to be able to find.

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Erin

Los Angeles based writer. Let's keep it clean out there!

Erin has written 208 articles for us.

122 Comments

  1. So so tired of this trope.
    But I would say I’m Beth too, provided that she’s missing because she’s child-free and bored out of her mind with all the baby talk going on around Cherry Grove
    As I child-free lesbian over 30 I would last around 30-45 minutes in there before “disappearing”

    • I agree. A great example would be Dinah Shore weekend Palm Springs, the one in Vegas, and that one in Atalanta for woc Autostraddle had an article about. Seriously, Dinah is like a queer utopia, and know questions your choice of using a restroom, bikini choice, or dancing.

  2. I’m also Beth…..who nobody can find because she has gone one beach over to Fire Island to party with the boys….I can’t resist a dance party!

  3. To me, the point of this skit is that highlighting all these lesbian tropes is just as stupid as the trope of the naked boys on fire island. Nearly every gay guy I’m friends with thinks that (ridiculous) show on logo will set the community back 7-8 years. To gay jersey shore.

    Also those babies really need to be replaced with cats.

  4. i’m the guy in the tank top who said “it’s gay disneyland, y’all” except without the mustache

  5. OMG! I laughed so hard through this. So many great lines.

    I’m not any of these really. Although I can relate to the “It’s 9 o’clock” part.

  6. I’m at work but without watching this I can still confidently say that I’m the one off in a guest room making friends with the cat

  7. “…the queer landscape has changed so much even in the past five years that this really feels like the last year you’re going to be able to get away with something like this without calling attention to the fact that you haven’t met a gay person below the age of 30 in a decade…”

    omg ERIN, I hope so!!!

  8. I’m so conflicted right now…

    Am I “I see you” while sobbing in bed? Or do I more readily identify as “celebrating the wolf sanctuary puzzle”? Ugh, this is so hard for me, emotionally.

  9. I’m “I see you. I see you.”

    (nearly snorted out my green tea, in a vegan cafe, watching this)

  10. Gah. I was watching this on Hulu with my girlfriend yesterday and I had to both roll my eyes in annoyance and laugh. It’s annoying to default to such an old trope, but also the stereotype is definitely not dead. I lost nearly half my women’s hockey team to baby-making two years ago and now they host lesbian mommies and their babies gatherings on the regular. I’m happy for them. We’re all in our mid-to-late 30’s and I know the struggles they’ve been through to start a family and the concerns they have just being parents under this administration. But… I am not settled down and interested in talking about getting a baby to take the nipple during breastfeeding or whatever baby crap I’ve been trying to tune out in the lobby after our hockey games now. Send me to fire island, please, where I can be aggressively and repeatedly walked into as if I don’t exist or my presence is an insult. At least there’s a bar there, and no screaming babies or plans on how to share a CSA.

  11. I aspire to be Sasheer Zamata’s above-it-all side-eye, but alas, I’m Chris, the no-screen time rule ignorer and lactose intolerant one.

  12. Much as I’d like to be the one in bed with Kate (because obviously), I’m definitely the one sipping wine in the corner and silently watching everyone else’s relationship drama unfold.

  13. What’s the name of the song that they’re all humming around the table? It’s driving me crazy that I don’t remember

  14. Erin, can you lead lesbian stereotype improv games at a-camp?

    I have no other ideas to contribute to this concept but I just feel like you’d do a good job.

  15. i’m sasheer, the unnnamed black lesbian who looks away when the “no screens” drama starts so she can grab her phone to start a story thread for black twitter #screenbae

  16. Was there one that is equal parts terrified and curious of babies, while doing a jigsaw puzzle and drinking kombucha, because that is def me.

  17. I’ll be Chris if I can be married to Puck. (Cecily Strong – swoon!) And yes, I’m also team Bette

  18. I’m the one with the screens. Pockets full of screens. So many “please do not talk to me, I’m frightened of socializing, this is stressful” screens.

  19. I’m the “I need you to see me” sobbing on the bed, after being shocked that people still make noise at nearly 9 pm.

  20. I’m the whole “I thought we said no screens” conversation. Also because it’s hard to be in love with me.

  21. I need a Cherry Grove: Brooklyn Edition season. It’ll be a group of millennial queers arguing about who is more radical than who while hanging out at Riis Beach, drinking beers and smoking cigarettes dramatically on a stoop, and posting on Tumblr and Queer Exchange.

  22. Okay, now that I’ve found the un-geoblocked version and actually watching it, I’m absolutely whoever started the dinner table singalong.

  23. Wait is Scarlett Johansson Beth? Unless wolf sanctuary mom has options for who’s packing the water socks.

    (I’m miracle of home water birth #3)

    • It took 3 watches to realize long blonde hair was Scarlett Johansson and not Kate McKinnon claiming dibs on being two lesbians in the same sketch

  24. I just exchanged texts with my gf about how water births make us gag so I guess I’m the Fire Island gays.

  25. didn’t keep up with my plan to refresh the comments all day but this 91 total comments were such a treat to come back to. I see ALL OF YOU ❤️

  26. Ahahahaha yeah the stereotypes are a bit outdated in some ways butttt this is also a great representation of what I often find myself ranting about to straight people: gay men and lesbians are very different groups and “homosexual” is not a uniting enough force most of the time. Our hobbies are often very different…
    It started when a soccer mom who works in my place of employment found out I was gay and was like “omg you must know my [45 year old gay] brother!” No ma’am. No my early-20s-flanneled-lesbian-self does not.

  27. I’m Beth, cause I’m also a femme with long blonde hair who often wants to just cuddle new babies. And maybe get kissed by Kate McKinnon.

  28. I’m the conflicted lesbian who wants all the things lol.

    Part of me is Beth because instead of a party I’d rather be at home playing dinosaurs with my autistic step-daughter.

    Another part would be secretly replacing all the babies with cats because the only cute babies are my own.

    Another part would be hoping for some great stimulating conversation.

    And yet another part would be trying to start a game of Truth or Dare in hopes of getting to make-out with Scarlet and/or start an orgy

    Can I has all of that? I want all of that lol =^.^=

  29. A lot of people seem to want to replace the babies with cats. This is a reality show I can get into.

  30. I’m the one hiking in the day time, drinking wine and reading books on the beach at night, and hiding from all the drama by just avoiding all people. This is why I’m not in the clip – I was just gone. I’m also the one that’s single forever…

  31. I’m whoever gets with Scarlett Johansen! She’s my secret crush. I’ve watched more than one terrible movie based on how she looked in the trailer.

    Sadly, I’m also the bi woman who’s not on the show due to bi-erasure.

  32. I’m definitely sobbing in bed and then yelling at my wife to stop shouting at people out the window because it’s too late. She’s so Kate McKinnon in that… except no hat. Just really dapper brown leather shoes and the beer.

  33. I know this is stereotypical, but like… my fiancée and I ARE the crying-in-bed lesbians, the singing-around-the-table lesbians, and will probably be the tired-at-9 p.m. waterbirth lesbians. Sometimes stereotypes are based on truth.

  34. I’m the unseen single friend who spends the whole time sitting on the beach under a gallon of sunscreen and an umbrella, earbuds firmly secured in ears, reading books and ignoring both the babies AND the boys.

    • Is there room under your umbrella for another headphone-wearing book reader? Because that sounds much more appealing than a house full of babies or noisy drunk boys.

  35. SNL was never very good even when it was new. Now that they have a has-been hack regularly attacking the only non-globalist POTUS who will protect us from islam & sharia law, I await their cancellation.

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