A blast from the past.

In which Santana doesn’t kiss any girls but she does wear a series of sexy outfits and boss everyone around while holding adorable puppies.

Welcome to a deluxe two-in-one review of the sixth and seventh episodes of season two of Orphan Black! These would have been up sooner, but things like A-Camp, A-Plague, and A-Pain of Returning to the Hetero World have sidelined me. So what did I miss? ALL THE THINGS, apparently.

This week in Rosewood Rumer Willis drops by to show off some sexy pictures of Emily drilling. Drill, baby, drill.

In which Paige and Emily virtually U-Haul and Aria considered a longterm sub-dom BDSM relationship.

Last week I was on a mountain with no internet! So welcome to your very very overdue “Faking It” recap, just in time for tonight’s episode.

This week on “Faking It,” the lesbians got crowned homecoming queens and everybody had sexual dreams about each other!

What drug were the Glee writers on while designing this year’s Christmas special? That question and more will not be answered in this week’s recap!

The season premiere of Pretty Little Liars finally answered all of our burning questions! Like which college will Emily and Paige UHaul off to in the fall?!

This week on Glee, Brittany had a mental breakdown and ate a lot of Cheese Puffs. Sponsored by Crayola.

It’s time for long drives, short cries, thwarted dates and exes who aren’t quite ready to say goodbye!

This is the greatest television show of all time.

Go get ’em, Supergirl.

On the very last episode ever of “Faking It,” everybody attends a very weird New Year’s Eve party.

It’s going to be a big summer, so we’ve made you a calendar to use as a queer lady TV-viewing guide.

This week on Glee, the new kids finally got some lines! NOT THOSE KINDS OF LINES

Lena teaches Stef to twerk, says the phrase “heteronormative thinking,” continues to be flawless.

This week on “Faking It,” Amy doesn’t win Miss Congeniality, but neither does Lauren, and neither does Karma. Neither does Liam! Or Duke or Shane or Reagan. But everybody’s hair looks GREAT.

This week on Faking It, Girls Night becomes “Lots of Girls Night”!

Everyone: ALI NO
Ali: ALI YES