Saturday Morning Cartoons: The Suburbs

Welcome to Saturday Morning Cartoons, a segment where four artists take turns delighting you with their whimsy, facts and punchlines on Saturday mornings! Our esteemed cartoon critters are Cameron GlavinAnna BongiovanniMegan Praz and Yao Xiao. Today’s cartoon is by Anna!


Suburb1

suburb2

suburb3

suburb4

Suburb5

Before you go! Autostraddle runs on the reader support of our AF+ Members. If this article meant something to you today — if it informed you or made you smile or feel seen, will you consider joining AF and supporting the people who make this queer media site possible?

Join AF+!

Archie

I'm a cartoonist living in Minneapolis. Co-Author and artist of A Quick And Easy Guide To They/Them Pronouns. Author of Grease Bats, coming out Fall 2019 with Boom! Studios! If I'm not working I'm socializing. If I'm not out with friends I'm drawing. If I'm not doing any of those things I'm probably depressed. Support me using Patreon.

Archie has written 117 articles for us.

30 Comments

  1. “Despite being on earth for 25 years men are still able to freak me out.” TOO REAL. Loved this

  2. In this scenario I am def Scout but hope to one day be Andy.

    The best part is ‘we’re together so it’ll be ok.’ <3

    Great comic.

  3. Oh gosh. Some days I’m Andy and some days I’m Scout. It’s scary/infuriating that I don’t have complete control over which response my body decides to go with. But I guess it’s trying to protect me either way.

    This is just perfect though. Maybe my favorite of yours.

  4. Back in VA when my hair was short and I was still in denial over what chest binding was doing to my back, I had “faggot” screamed at me from a moving vehicle

    it was very confusing

    Everyone involved was very confused

    • My sibling use to call me faggot or variation of sometimes and each time I’d correct him on his slur terminology. It never seemed to stick tho.
      But he’s like supposed to be the superior being and all so I don’t know why he didn’t seem to retain a simple correction.

      Anytime a queer lady person gets called faggot it is confusing to all involved. So it must be a rule or something.

  5. This happened to me and a friend. Conveniently, I had a sandwich and threw it at the car. Revenge is better than white bread any day.

    • I don’t think I can throw food at a car, I’ve seen what happens when someone throws something at a car, even if did no damage.

    • Is revenge the best thing since sliced bread???? *Drowns out crickets laughing at own joke*

  6. Yelling does feel great.

    This reminds me of the time my fiancée and I were walking at night to go get some food. We were crossing the street and this car almost hit me, even though we had the right of way. The car just stops and this woman starts yelling obscenities out of the window some of it homophobic and racist. We gave the finger and my fiancée got so upset she started yelling in an accent I can only describe as new yorkerish?

    She said something along the lines of “Next time watch where you’re going bitch!” Then the car starts backing up towards us like the woman was going to do something. My fiancée was all like “what you gonna do?! Nothing! Get outta here!” And we both started running towards the car. The woman drive off like really fast. Then we both laughed and realized that there was a bunch of cars at the intersection watching and waiting for the whole thing to blow over. That just made us laugh harder. Good times.

  7. I wish I could have channeled my inner Andy about three weeks ago, in Stanley Park – the last time I was called a ‘DYKE!!!’ I always think I will be prepared but usually just go into shock and stand there like an over-sized 5 year old. Maybe I’m warming up to a Gloria Mendoza-esque mic drop!

    • I think my own reaction totally varies! If I’m with other people I tend to last back more, but if I’m alone I am totally the same–shock and just stare at whoever’s yelling at me. I wish I had more control over it!

  8. Ugh. You get me. I keep getting called a femnazi at work because I’m sick of my coworker’s ska music (the same 20 tracks for a whole year- A YEAR) and I speak up about it.

    So I…imagine Nazis painting their nails and being super catty. Because anything else makes me want to beat him to death with his own cutting board.

    • omg how terribly boring your coworker must be to only listen to the same music for an entire year! BORING!

  9. I’m Andy in that situation but with an unholy possibly sadistic glee at the chance to mess with someone, but be in the right.
    Like my whole face just lights up and I have to struggle not to smile like a super villain.

    But I struggle with polite smalltalk. >_>
    Adaptive trade off maybe?

  10. What’s nice about the car yellers though is that mostly they LEAVE REALLY FAST because there’s only so long you can be condescending from an enclosed, seated position with increasing degrees of neck crainage. And like, tell me something I don’t know! Oh my god! I (personally) didn’t dress this way to be mistaken for a straight person!

    The weirdest heckling I ever experienced was walking just off-campus at night to a Vagina Monologues cast party with my ex and their ex-ish (like you do, I didn’t realise how l-word gay this situation was til I wrote it out). Some drunk dude started following us and shouting “Ellen! ELLLENNNNN!!!” at us? Like he and his friend followed us TO THE DOOR of the party. Just shouting “Ellen” from a few feet away before someone yelled at them and before they could think of another celesbian.

    • So this supports my theory that I could have drawn a street harasser saying LITERALLY ANYTHING and someone would have “same thing happened to me”

  11. So much this! Ugh! This was my experience the entire last two years of high school due to a crew of dudebros from my year…and all their friends… So yeah I’m a weird combination of Scout and Andy these days, depending on location and companions. In my head I’m Scout but then the rage takes over… Mercifully it’s been a while.

    • uhhhh sooo terrible! :( sorry this happened to you for two years in high school!

  12. When I first went out with my now-girlfriend, I walked her through a parking lot for her to catch a cab on the other side. I was walking my bike. We weren’t holding hands or being overly affectionate as it was our first outing and were nervous.

    A man started yelling “dykes” at us and started complaining that the city was becoming overrun with lesbians. That everybody was a lesbian now. This was the best news I had ever heard but was still terrified.

  13. I’m terrified that with my short hair I’ll get harassed and called names-luckily this hasn’t happened yet. I just get harassed for having giant breasts, not for being queer -_-

  14. Last time I got yelled at (I think it was ‘lesbo’), no words came to me so I just turned around and gave the two guys (who were waiting at a bus stop) the biggest, most smug grin I could master. It was quite satisfying! I was in a busy area during the middle of the day with lots of people around though, so I guess I also had a sense of safety.

Comments are closed.