After April’s gentle lessons to release and surrender, May is here to get us into trouble. I’m talking about butterflies in the stomach, heart pounding wildly, head full of bad ideas. Venus, planet of love and pleasure, is officially direct and out of its retrograde shadow, but will be in Aries all month—not the easiest placement. With Venus in Aries, our passions and our tempers run a little hotter, and we’re more likely to both take risks (new flings, intense sex, leaving a bad relationship) and run from the consequences of our actions (lots of processing, committing to someone, taking accountability). If you are in the habit of being impulsive or irresponsible in your romances, this energy will require careful handling. If you’re more the suffer-in-silence, avoid conflict type of lover, this month could bring some welcome self-assertion and clarity about what you want and don’t want.
Add to the mix that Mars will be in Gemini all month, and things just get more exciting. Mars represents our passions—what propels us toward or away from each other: desire and anger. In Gemini, Mars is quick and curious and active. Gemini and Aries together are potentially explosive—think of wind blowing over sparks. If you’re thoughtful and intentional this month you can direct this fire where you want it. If you’re not careful, you could end up in some tense situations quite suddenly. Aries is our courage and Gemini our curiosity: this month, it will pay off to take risks in your effort to learn more about yourself and your partners. Just don’t jump to any hasty conclusions before you have all the information!
Finally, May brings us the second trine between Saturn and Uranus, on the 18th. This aspect repeats three times over the course of a year, and gives this year a constructive-yet-wildly-revolutionary quality. Saturn is the part of us that wants to establish safe, secure, stable foundations: a longterm marriage, a monogamous commitment, the ability to sacrifice in order to maintain closeness. Uranus, on the other hand, is our desire to completely wild out. Uranus couldn’t cares less about gay marriage and is more interested in subversive acts of love and lust that resist assimilation. As these opposing forces meet harmoniously this month, you may find yourself better able to integrate these impulses in your own psyche. How can you rely on your strong work ethic to open a space of total freedom in your relationships? How can commitment and wildness co-exist? What does sustainable, revolutionary love look like?
As always, the astro-literate are advised to read their Moon and Venus signs first, followed by the Sun and Ascendant. I’ll be taking a break from giving readings for most of May, but you can always shoot me a message or book a personalized reading for June and beyond. Good luck out there, this month!
I can’t actually guarantee you all the hot sex and wild romance you desire this month, but I can say if you don’t get it the fault is not in your stars. This year is a powerful one for you, and this month is one of the highlights. Have you been dreaming of meeting the perfect top? Flirting with your hottest friend? Getting into rope play with your longterm boo? Whatever is fanning your flames right now, you’ll have ample opportunities to ask for what you want and the odds are on your side that you’ll find it. The 19th is the best day for making your dreams a reality—just be careful that what you begin this month is worth following through on in the months to come!
You’re learning so much about what you need in love and desire that you may get thrown this month by what’s still very much hidden. Your self-awareness is excellent when you’re alone or explaining your revelations to a friend, but there are still emotional patterns that will surprise you this month. Watch for these faithful old habits (defensiveness, withdrawal, jealousy, oh my!) to rear their alarming heads when you’re really getting close to someone. Especially on the week of the 19th, pay attention to what makes you react strongly and why. This is an excellent month for paying close attention to those slippery assumptions and anxieties we often ignore. Be brave and kind to yourself as you do this important work!
With Mars in your sign all month, this is an eventful time for you! Your passions are strong, and could lead you in some interesting directions. Forget what you thought you knew about what turns you on—or at least, be prepared to discover a different side of you. Watch out for a tendency to get stymied, though. You could be unsure if you’re over- or under-thinking something. You don’t need to act on every urge this month, but it’s worth exploring a few of them, alone or with a willing helper. Expect some insights and some challenges to come your way from your closest partners and your community at large. Let anything too hot cool off a bit before you engage.
One of the major themes for you this month is freedom versus responsibility. Are you in touch with your deepest desires and longings? Does it feel dangerous to try to name them, much less seek them out? If you’ve been hurt or disappointed, you may feel safer not wanting or hoping for anything. This month stirs long-buried dreams and reminds you that you are stronger than you thought you were. Let yourself heal from the story that you are not enough.
This is a shinier month than usual for you, but don’t get hung up on the surface sparkle. How you choose to show up right now—femme or glittertrash or diesel or a little from all the columns—is far less important than how it feels to be seen. You’re wearing your history. You are a living map of what you’ve experienced. How comfortable are you about being truly seen and recognized? In all the excitement this month (and there will be fireworks!), remember who sees you completely and holds you in unconditional love.
In the incredibly true adventure of two Virgo girls in love, their first date might be taking a Sharpie to the collected works of some misogynist writer and creating feminist poetry from the words that remain. This month, you’re channeling some fierce critique into romantic and creative activities. Don’t be afraid to make waves. Don’t pass up the opportunity to get weird with some strange and beautiful queer just because it’s safer to stay at home.
This month is all about finding the right words, and the right time, and the right person to say them to. Linguists call some words “performative speech acts,” which means that saying them aloud changes reality. Words like “I do” in a wedding ceremony fall under this category. Witches call some words spells, meaning that saying them with strong intention can help change reality. This month, treat your words as sacred acts. Speak the truth you want to create.
Now is the perfect time to exhale and release. If you’ve ever been to a chiropractor or had a deep tissue massage, you might recognize that phrase as the prelude to some intense structural readjustment. Don’t tense up in anticipation, though! The changes that come to your relationships this month will all help you deepen, relax, and release. Dedicate yourself to this practice on the 10th during the Full Moon in Scorpio. Promise yourself that you don’t have to be stuck in anxieties and scarcity. Know that you deserve love that lets you fully relax.
Your hard work is paying off this month. Whatever you’ve been trying to achieve, you are notably more competent and confident right now. You may notice a lot of energy and passion for the partnerships that sustain you—this could translate as hotter sex, or longer fights. Try to reduce the latter, especially if you’re in platonic connections, by doing something playfully competitive together. The vitality, passion, and enthusiasm of this month can all be deeply nourishing to you as long as you don’t get stuck bickering with someone you love. Listen carefully, feel your feelings completely, and enjoy this influence!
Some relationships are all about small adjustments. Maybe your girlfriend is more of a processing junkie and you need silence and space to unwind. Maybe your partner asks for guidelines around polyamory that feel restrictive to you. Maybe the girl of your dreams is just always running late. Whatever the recurring issues are in your most important connections, romantic or otherwise, this is a month when you’ll have a lot of energy for making adjustments. How do you both get your needs met? What kind of compromises work, and what kind just feel like no one is happy? Where do you need to get more clear in your language, and where do you need to just stop talking and hold each other? Remember, imperfect and temporary solutions are still better than none!
Decisions that might usually feel private and internal are strangely external and visible this month, like you’ve written out a pros and cons list on your forehead, or accidentally shared your diary on social media. Luckily, what you’re grappling with is worth sharing widely and you might get great ideas from unexpected quarters. This month is a particularly powerful one for you, as your sign ruler, Uranus, enters a trine with Saturn—this configuration helps you name and build and grow something tangible and solid from the stray electrical currents of your imagination. Invite a partner or group of friends to collaborate.
If there’s any tension in your home, this month will tease it out. Of course, you’ve probably already been feeling it in the form of headaches or depression or wanting to retreat to your bed the moment you get home. The good news is getting things out in the open (this could mean structured conversations with your domestic partners—or your broader family, if you live alone) will dramatically improve your conditions. The bad news is you’ll be required to demonstrate impeccable self-confidence as you resolve any issues. Practice trusting that you don’t ef up every relationship, that you’re totally capable of mature intimacy, and that you can be patient with whatever you’re still learning.