Welcome to You Need Help, where you seek advice and we try our very best to give it. This has traditionally been done by way of individual Formspring accounts, Autostraddle’s Tumblr and a Formspring Friday column, which has all been very fun and insightful.
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For more info on sending in questions, see the bottom of this post. Let’s get down to bossing people around on the internet! Today we’re going to talk about dating your co-worker.
We went on one date. We’re going on another one and we’re great one-on-one, but we work together and now all of a sudden I freeze/get so shy with her at work. Any tips on how to overcome this? It’s still so new, but I don’t want to hurt her feelings.
People act differently at work than they do on dates. You’re obviously still you either way, but a working environment calls for a detached politeness, maybe even authority, and dating requires this super vulnerable honesty and sweetness. It’s probably a little weird that the two of you get to (have to?) interact with both sides of you from the get-go. I think this is why dating co-workers isn’t advised: the sheer awkwardness.
But here you are, dating your co-worker, like sexy little renegades. I would acknowledge the awkward of this situation. Just saddle up that elephant in the room and ride it like a pony. May I suggest this:
HELLO CO-WORKER THIS IS AWKWARD, that we’re co-workers and also I want to bone you, right? Too bad I can’t be sexier / flirtier at work but that’s just the way it is, eh? Good thing we’re going bowling next Wednesday — I can flirt my ass off on the lanes! IN MY ZONE, BABY. Hahahaha ok back to work!
And then you just get back to work. To keep things balanced, I suggest ramping up the flirty side the next time you’re out together. She’ll feel really special and you’ll be doing your part to keep your personal life separate from your professional.
Or ask any team member you’d like: Meet the Team
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