Dad, I’m like 37, you can’t force me to mow the lawn anymore.
But crossfade into the DiLaurentis residence, where Jason and Mr. D are fighting. Looks like Mr. D doesn’t trust Jason to leave the house.
Nooo, no, no, not ALL men.
Emily awkwardly pops out with the Misandrist Dog who seems not to mind Jason and Mr. D. Mr. D is like, “Wait, who the fuck bought a dog?” He seems to think Mrs. D is hiding out in Philly, where Jason wants to go.
Aria stomps on into her own damn home to find Mona and Mike canoodling on the couch.Guh-ross.
Quick, Lucy, look surprised. GREAT. Okay, now try disgusted. PERFECT. Pissed? Nailed it. Kind of sleepy? Got it. Good, good, now do all of those in one expression. And go.
Mona makes a remark about Aria walking around all by herself, given what happened to Alison. Hmmmm. Mike mentions he borrowed Aria’s iPod, which could explain where the violin music came from. He also says the violin music was coming from his room. Suss. Aria calls out Mona for being a fake as soon as Mike leaves the room.
So then you wrap your lips around it like this, and flick your tongue kinda lightly, and, well, you’ll see.
Mona’s dangerous. She wears leather jackets. Now that Aria knows about the Lost Woods and Mona, she can’t even pretend to trust her. Mona asks how Mr. Fitz is doing. Soooo, she knows.
Dog totally isn’t having issues with Mr. D. All is well that ends well, right? Right?
Totes innocent tho
Hanna heads on over to the DiLaurentis house to give Mr. D the emails from Jessica’s account, mentioning she was on a yoga retreat? Yeah, right. Emily comes back from walking the pup, and they leave together to climb into Hanna’s car and scheme. Hanna wants to tell Hanna about the email she found, and Emily reports that Jason is hiding Mrs. D in Philly.
Just then, Jason pops up at the window and scares the shit out of Hanna and Emily, threatening them from helping our Mr. D re: Mrs. D any longer.
They follow Jason to Philly, naturally, and he visits a strange apartment building.
No, sir, we really definitely completely don’t want to be buying what you’re selling.
Emily and Hanna wait for him to leave so they can visit the apartment he was in, but a super creepy dude tells them to leave before they can find anything. Womp womp.
Yeah, babe, but I’m stuck on this level of Candy Crush and I need to focus on what’s important to me right now.
After what I’m assuming was sex with a cami and bra still on, Toby and Spencer spoon. I’d like Toby so much more if he was the little spoon. Also, can we all agree that his hair is the weirdest it has ever been? What’s going on there, buddy? Spencer’s phone is ringing off the hook as she cuddles Toby. Just put the damn thing on silent, seriously, I’d be so pissed if my girlfriend’s phone was psycho ringing like that. Toby picks up that Spencer is upset about something, but she doesn’t tell him anything, because the Liars are way better at bottling things up then letting people in. Can you even blame them at this point?
GUYS IT IS SO META CAN YOU EVEN STAND IT
Down at the Mossoleum, a totally perfectly normal place to hang, Ali is visiting her grave. Mona finds her there and Ali pleads that she’s changed, that they could be friends now. Mona’s not buying it.
In fact, she confesses that she sent the text. Looks like no BFF necklaces here for the moment.
Aria’s over at Spencer’s house, saying she’s FOR SURE going to the cops, but Hanna and Emily are plotting what they need to do about Jason instead. Aria’s freaking about Mona knowing they were in New York, and Emily assures her Mona is dead as Hanna says A is dead. Aria’s not so convinced.
You’re breaking in to my house at night and I’M the creep here?
Spencer isn’t at the house meeting at her house, because instead she’s busting into Ali’s house. The door’s open, she waltzes on in, and Jason is sitting in the dark. Spencer asks him if he was in New York, and he denies it all. He asks if Spencer thinks Jason is the one who kidnapped her, and that Mr. D is trying to frame him for it. But before we can get answers, the Man Issues Dog is barking outside. Is it a man? Is Timmy stuck in a well? They walk outside and Emily asks the dog what’s wrong like it’s going to answer.
Maybe the shelter lady actually meant “Issues With Digging Up Dead Bodies”
You know what’s wrong? The dog found Mrs. D buried in the yard, right in the same spot as Alison.
Mouth slightly agape? Check. Glistening eyes? Check. Furrowed brow? Check. See – totally upset.
When Jason sees, he looks honestly shocked and upset. Now, he’s always been a good actor, but that didn’t seem like a I Killed My Mom look, you know?
blending in don’t even worry about it y’all
The cops show up to take the body and Ali stands in the middle of it in a black hoodie, like no one is going to notice the girl standing in the middle of everything in a hooded jacket. Poor Alison. I genuinely feel bad for her at this point. Her welcome home isn’t going very well at this point, is it?
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The fact that Emily was clinging so hard to the fact that Shana was A really bothers me. Like, do the girls not realize that doesn’t make sense? Maybe they’re just doing that cause they really want things to finally be over, but you’d think they’d have learned that you can’t let your guard down when things appear to be calm–that’s when shit gets real! Anyway, I actually loved Aria in this episode because she was the only person properly distressed by what’s been going on.
And on that subject, I guess I’m confused. Are we (the audience) supposed to think Shana was A? Cause I don’t buy that. But Mona just came out and said she sent that text to Ali. So I am confused–is she evil but not A? Or did she just openly admit to being A and now the mystery isn’t the drama of the show, it’s the fact that the liars are caught in their lie again?
Anyway, Mike was looking cute this episode. If he was a lady, I would be all up on that short on the sides but longer on top hair cut. Toby, on the other hand, was bringing back the 90s in a totally gross way. I always think he’s gross though…why do he and Spencer get all the implied sex scenes?!?!
Ugh, Alison is the literal worst. She’s so needlessly dramatic and such an asshole, even now. I’m kind of dreading how she’s probably going to be directly ruining the other Liars’ lives now, rather than indirectly like she has been.
I liked you better when you were dead, lady!
I’m really loving how weird it is having Ali back in Rosewood. The episodes so far in this season are certainly showing us, this is an entirely new show now. IT kinda re-birthed itself, yet all the same story is there. :) There really isn’t a lot to talk about from these episodes, they’re more showing us the differences and adjustments, than answering any questions. =D