Oh, Hey! It’s Alyssa #49: Pride

“Oh Hey! It’s Alyssa” is a biweekly webcomic by Alyssa

Alyssa is a totally complete incomplete paraplegic and thirty-something hanky-in-the-pocket cartoonist weirdo!

A. has written 68 articles for us.


  1. TERFs are counter-revolutionary agents of the patriarchy, and they have no place at Pride, or really, any event that claims to be by and for marginalized people. Hand a TERF a gun, and I’d be as scared of them as I am of the cops.

      • I agree with what I understood as the essence of this comment. And I am very glad labeleism isn’t as strong here in Europe – as far as I am concerned – as it seems to be in the USA…

        Be who you are and accept and be kind to each other regardless!

      • Hi Isla, I think you’ll be glad to hear that parents and doctors are also extremely cautious abut trans kids physically transitioning! Social transition *always* comes first with pre-pubescent trans kids. Once they reach puberty, they are often given a hormone blocker that just delays puberty. This is reversible – once they stop taking it, the hormones their body produces would kick in and start puberty. Or, they have the choice to start taking hormones and go through the puberty of their choice. If the family is lucky, they’ll have access to a therapist specializing in gender identity and kids. All of the specialists say that the important thing is listening to who your kid says they are and how they talk about themself and giving them space to explore that. I.e. specialists counsel that just because a girl plays with trucks it doesn’t mean the kid is a trans boy. You can’t make a call based on that because gender identity is about who you are, not what toys you play with.

        I agree with you that all kids (all people) should have the freedom to explore their identity without stereotypes and assumptions thwarting that!

        I can’t think of a lot of resources for trans kids and their families off the top of my head, but here are some:
        MyKidIsGay.com – has some articles on trans kids as a resource to parents
        RaisingMyRainbow.com – a blog run by a mother in California where she talks about her gender nonconforming son an her family’s life
        HowToBeAGirlPodcast.com – podcast by a mom in Washington about raising her trans daughter (who is now 8 I think?)
        check out the stories of Jazz Jennings and Coy Mathis, two trans girls

      • Isla, I think that if you truly listened to trans people, you’d know that “growing up to be themselves” is probably the single most important value that the community shares. You are aggressively misinformed about trans kids, and I hope you do some reading.

      • I understand that this comment is earnestly intended but it’s based on a false notions about how trans identity and access to health care are practically experienced by children. You make it sound like the minute any child shows any signs of not conforming to his or her assigned gender they’re pushed by outside forces to identify as trans and then fast tracked to irreversible hormone therapy. This simply isn’t true. Transition isn’t casual for anyone, least of all children.

        Trans kids are often required to insist to their (usually) cis parents that they are trans for a long time before being taken seriously, and most parents resist accepting them before realizing that their gender identity isn’t going away. Medical authorities proceed very cautiously with these kids. They are given extensive counselling to confirm that they aren’t simply cis kids who don’t conform to the binary rules of gender. Trans health care isn’t like buying a gun. There are a lot of hoops to jump through, even for adults. There are twice as many hoops for kids.

        Prepubescent trans children are given the means to DELAY puberty and that delay causes no irreversible physical changes. The vast majority of them end up confirming that they want to transition and are happy with the results. Studies show that kids are *more* distressed when denied access to puberty blockers and hormone therapy. (https://www.sciencedirect.com/science/article/pii/S1056499311000770?via%3Dihub)

        As an aside, does the fact that the medical establishment is patriarchal mean that we should do away entirely with birth control, an invention developed through racist experimentation? What about abortion? Or breast reconstruction surgery for cis cancer survivors? Or fertility treatments for cis women struggling to have children? Or hormone treatment for menopausal cis women? Or the countless medical conditions and disabilities that require a lifetime of medical intervention? If we are going to use the patriarchal nature of the modern medical establishment to deny trans people health care, why draw the line there?

        I understand that medical intervention makes people nervous (this is why there are ethical guidelines to follow) but choosing *not* to allow kids who identify as trans to seek medical intervention is itself just as radical and ideological. Denying kids the right to identify as trans and access health care increases negative mental health outcomes like depression and even suicide.

        Trans kids are not confused homosexuals, but they do have one significant thing in common with us: denying them the right to self-determination is psychologically devastating and constitutes a human rights violation.

  2. yesss! I so agree! As a person from eastern Europe I see this change (from pride that is a new movement to corporate rainbow event) happening just in front of my eyes and that is a bit sickening. On one hand, hey – we, as community, don’t have rights to marry, nor even to have the most basic form of partnership, are not protected from homophobia and are very very vulnerable, so recognition and support seems to be very needed. On the other hand tho, it sucks. I don’t want to march with global companies, pinkwashing their issues, I want to march with my friends.

  3. This is very much how I feel. From cops showing off in their older base motor Mustang Convertible(police car, w/no flags or color other than b&w on there); to corporations pretending, it’s not for me.

    • It shouldn’t be an argument cause HELLO the first Pride was a riot against police harassment and persecution of queer people.
      Sure it was against the law to wear less than 3 articles of clothing intended for one’s assigned gender, but there’s plenty of proof cops “had fun” arresting our fore-parents because society didn’t give a shit if what happened to them and some times even found it hilarious. >_>

  4. Completely agree.

    Love me a good “off pride” though.

    Also sometimes in smaller cities/communities you’ll get to experience a truly special pride. Two years ago in Nottingham QTIPOC & BLM got to lead the march and make it super political. Too bad cops were marching like 5 rows behind ?

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