Feature image via tara beth photography. All of the photographs on NSFW Sundays are taken from various tumblrs and do not belong to us. All are linked and credited to the best of our abilities in hopes of attracting more traffic to the tumblrs and photographers who have blessed us with this imagery. The inclusion of a photograph here should not be interpreted as an assertion of the model’s gender identity or sexual orientation. If there is a photo included here that belongs to you and you want it removed, please email bren [at] autostraddle dot com and it will be removed promptly, no questions asked.
Welcome to NSFW Sunday!
+ Sex gets better in old age, according to a study that takes what the people involved actually consider “good sex” into consideration:
“[A]s people in the study aged, they placed more emphasis on the quality – not quantity – of sexual encounters. For example, frequency of sex became less important with age, and the amount of thought and effort invested in sex became more important.
These changing priorities were key predictors of sexual quality of life for older adults, and appeared to buffer its decline. When we matched older and younger adults on key characteristics of their sex lives – along with sociodemographic characteristics, and mental and physical health – older adults actually had better sexual quality of life.”
filthy_versace via rodeoh
+ Mouthwash can block STIs from spreading orally, according to a very old study that a very new study has confirmed:
“In 1879, an new antiseptic emerged to help clean floors, eliminate odors, and treat diseases like gonorrhea. The product’s creator, Joseph Lister, called his product Listerine, which as it turns out, makes a fine mouthwash thanks the 21.5 percent alcohol content.
A new study published yesterday in the peer-review journal Sexually Transmitted Infections finds that the late Lister was no kook: His product works as advertised, significantly reducing gonorrhea bacteria colonies in the mouth and throat.”
+ Here’s what asexuals fantasize about.
+ And here’s what sapiosexuals fantasize about.
+ Some of the most popular Christmas porn searches include “santa,” “xmas present,” “christmas orgy,” “christmas threesome,” and “merry christmas.”
Playful Promises lingerie via the lingerie addict
+ Blocking porn doesn’t work.
+ At Oh Joy Sex Toy, Mady G writes about appearances.
+ The We-Vibe was found to be collecting data on users’ vibrator use without permission earlier this year. Standard Innovation Corp., its parent company, has settled a related lawsuit out of court.
+ The Vulva Gallery is an instagram account of illustrated vulvas.
+ Sex shop employees fought off a robber by throwing sex toys at him.
@_Qtip_ via rodeoh
I’m a bit disappointed about the sapiosexual link being included. Of course people can find intelligence attractive, but the idea of that as a sexual orientation or as am organizing way of classifying attractions strikes me as ableist and racist due to our understandings of how intelligence is measured and classified to favor certain groups over others and how intellectually disabled people are discriminated against.
Seconded.
It’s not discrimination, it’s realistic. If people can’t keep up with me intellectually, I get bored. I find intelligence more attractive than looks or personality, and I go by how ‘I’define that, not how others do. That’s not to disparage people with for example learning difficulties, who of course have the right to sexual/romantic relationships, if those are things they want. Also relationships with that imbalance can be creepy, eg someone with Downs Syndrome in a relationship with someone who doesn’t have any kind of learning difficulty/impairment is likely to get taken advantage of, and there are increasingly documented cases of this.I agree definitions of intelligence can vary, you can have people without any kind of disability who choose not to read, listen, think and act questions, and who can access and understand that information.. but I don’t find those people attractive.
Learning difficulties/disabilities have nothing to do with intelligence. In order to be formally diagnosed with a learning disability, a person must score average or above on an IQ test.
I didn’t say it did, in fact I rather said it didn’t. Also, your definition isn’t true in England.
What part of the definition? Because the intelligence vs academic performance thing is pretty standard in Western psych when formally diagnosing people with learning disabilities such as dyslexia, for example.
So which is it, you agree with my definition or my definition is wrong? If you were not attempting to conflate the two you may want to rethink your wording, because I’m not sure how else to interpret “I find intelligence more attractive than looks” followed by “That’s not to disparage people with learning difficulties”.
The real disgust of that article is almost all of them saying that the people who are not smart enough for them are kind of worthless. No one could like them except for their looks and the sex. Like what is wrong with you? Just because the conversation isn’t compatible doesn’t mean they’re “imbeciles” like the last guy stated.
No one will force you to date someone you’re not compatible with, but you don’t have to openly insult their intelligence and personality in the process.
And this definitely intersects with ableism and racism, even if some people break through the barriers against them.
Agreed.
Additionally, I am very open to the idea of there being people whose primary sexual attraction comes from intelligence, but I have yet to hear of someone identifying as sapiosexual whose primary sexual attraction didn’t come from some unrelated physical attributes (including gender identity and expression), making sapiosexuality at best a secondary sexuality. But even then, having certain preferences in a long-term partner isn’t exactly a sexuality, is it? We’re not artsysexual or stableincomesexual. Slowly losing interest over the course of several dates because of X, despite initial sexual attraction, doesn’t make X a defining sexual identifier, does it?
At the same time I feel a little torn, because obviously I don’t want to expect sapiosexuals to be attracted to all intelligent people equally, just as they shouldn’t expect a very particular bisexual like myself to be attracted to everything that moves just because I’m bi. Of course it’s fine if certain male sapiosexuals only are attracted to conventionally beautiful female intelligent humans, for example… but if conventionally beautiful and female are the only characteristics necessary for attraction, is calling yourself sapiosexual anything but a pretentious way of declaring your other preferences? I don’t want to write off people who might genuinely be sexually attracted primarily to displays of what they consider to be intelligence, but there either seem to be a lot of poseurs or they define “sexuality” in a way I just can’t get behind
It’s not discrimination to know I need a partner who I can engage in deep and thoughtful discussion with, it’s self-awareness. And no one said intelligent people are inherently better than anyone else, just more compatible for someone with those preferences.
The problem is calling this attraction “valuing intelligence”. just because they don’t have fun discussing the themes and symbolism of A Tale Of Two Cities does not make them stupid. Who you are attracted to just has similar interests.
I’m not entirely convinced that that sapiosexual article isn’t satire.
Same…
“A woman who can actually win debates against me is unbelievably hot. Oh, and yes, a library is a turn on as well, as long as at least one classical work exists in it.” More sexist, or more classist/elitist/generally pretentious? I can’t decide. Probably satire; maybe just the patriarchy.
“Whether he is making me think or just dropping impressive knowledge bombs, that feeling has a whole-body effect.” Is “dropping impressive knowledge bombs” the same as mansplaining? I feel like it is. Has to be satire.
The guy who considers himself sapiosexual because he won’t date anyone who believes the Bush family eats babies, no matter how hot the person is. Hopefully satire?
Thanks Carolyn! As always. Great gallery and great links this week! And I really appreciated the sapiosexual link as one myself. Trading sapiosexual memes with this woman I started seeing might have been the hottest sexting I’ve ever had the privilege of enjoying.
god bless listerine
That sapiosexual one would be more interesting if it didn’t boil down to “I took people at face value and was shocked when they weren’t stupid like I assumed they were at first glance” tbh.
Man the sapiosexual link is insufferable and condescending. Liking someone with the same interests as you doesn’t make you special.
very very nice post keep sharing