No Filter Pregamed For The Emmys With Samira Wiley, Carrie Brownstein and Brittani Nichols

Welcome to No Filter, the most intellectually stimulating and psychologically rewarding column on all of Autostraddle dot com. This week, everybody walked a red carpet and looked glamorous and presumably hobnobbed with one another. You might have heard about it! Otherwise, they’ve been lounging in the park with their gal pals, walking their tiny dogs or wearing cute hats. Let’s hop to it:


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Samira, Selenis and Diane are Taylor, Cee and me on the staff bus to A-Camp, apparently.


Oh, just my dream date Carrie Brownstein squiring Miranda July to the Emmys, just a typical day.


All of our favourite lesbians’ weirdo homo soccer league got cute uniforms!


Who us? Injured? Nah. @camgrey @bsunitedsoccer #stitches #brownrecluse

A photo posted by Kate Moennig (@kateomoennig) on

Kate Moennig and Camila Grey didn’t get uniforms because they are injured. Ruby Rose didn’t get one because she’s on tour, slicking her hair back and staring intensely at people.


ellen

According to Riese, “I don’t even know if we are ready for what Ellen Page openly having a girlfriend means for us as a society.” She’s right. However, one thing it definitely means is more unsolicited opinions from brandon_jacob_34.


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Is it in bad taste for me as a neutral, responsible journalist to comment on how crazy hot Trace Lysette looked at the Emmys, like she does in this picture with Hari Nef? Because if so, I’ll leave it to you. I believe this is what esteemed Dr. Lizz Rubin would refer to as a “smokeshow.”


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Fashion week lives.


Hollywoo Stars and Celebrities: What Do They Know? Do They Know Things? Let's Find Out!

A photo posted by Brittani Nichols (@bishilarious) on

I’d like to celebrate Brittani Nichols’ excellent post-Emmys look here. She describes it as “lesbian mobster,” only I read it as “lesbian monster” and kept thinking “aw, but she looks nice.”


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Why, how’d you celebrate YOUR Emmy night?


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Tegan and Sara had a birthday and somebody got them these hats, portraits of the cats and an “IT’S TWINZ” banner. I hope they ate a lot of fried carbs.


Throwing back young Oneal

A photo posted by Tatum O'neal (@tatum__oneal) on

Mainly posting this so that we can A) dream of a time when we would have asked the very dreamy young Tatum O’Neal to the A-Camp prom, B) speculate about wtf exactly is going on between her and Rosie and C) admire how adorable people her age are when they try to figure out things like “Throwback Thursday” (a previous post includes the hashtag #tbthursday). You’re so close, kid!


We got locked in the elevator!!! ???

A photo posted by Lindsay Lohan (@lindsaylohan) on

Remember Lindsay Lohan? Well, she got locked in an elevator. Lindsay Lohan is reliving her days in the hit blockbuster smash Just My Luck these days.


Join us next week, when teen gumshoe Encyclopedia Brown investigates just who’s been putting bisexual former child stars in elevators around here.

Stef Schwartz is a founding member and the self-appointed Vapid Fluff Editor at Autostraddle.com. She currently resides in New York City, where she spends her days writing songs nobody will ever hear and her nights telling much more successful musicians what to do. Follow her on twitter and/or instagram.

Stef has written 427 articles for us.

16 Comments

  1. This was all super cool Stef but the best bit was the Encyclopaedia Brown reference! I dutifully borrowed every single book in my primary school library, & sunk into a malaise after I read them all.

    I was also obsessed with Tatum O’Neal because we had Paper Moon on video & now I know why I had to keep watching it.

  2. Ok Brandon_Jacob_34 is amazing. Just in case you all are reading this on your phones I have transcribed his soulful and literate comment for posterity:

    “wait a min so ellen is dating a tomboy tall lesbian i thought ellen would date someone who more like a women who likes dress up eetc. for example perfect women for her .they cute but i dont think theyare going last though and also i dont ellen really in love with her though just saying my opinion. you say in love with someone doesnt mean really in love with them, i think”

  3. YOU GUYS last night I had this dream that I was just strolling around Paris with Kate Moenig and she was dry and witty and a great wingwoman, and I directly attribute dreaming this to reading Vapid Fluff yesterday. So I’m just gonna go ahead and leave this here.

  4. I don’t know about you guys but I can’t wait for brandon_jacob_34’s new book on love and relationships where he’ll dazzle us all with his incredible insight!

    Sidenote: I just rolled my eyes so hard I think I sprained them. Ow!

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