Listling Without Commentary: 22 Excerpts From Brutal Amazon Customer Reviews Of “The L Word”

While re-watching L Word episodes on Amazon in order to screencap them for our 17 Devastating Lesbian Breakups post I drifted, as I so often do, into the customer reviews of The L Word. The one-star and two-star reviews, of course.  You’ll not be surprised to learn that people have very strong opinions about this program.

So, I present, ripped mercilessly out of context and sometimes edited for clarity but sometimes left totally intact and horrible, some of the best things amazon reviewers had to say about the show we will forever and always love to hate.


1. I heard that this show was the lesbian version of Sex and the City which is not at all true. They don’t delve into fashion at all.

2. To all the men who have daughters…… KEEP THEM AWAY FROM THIS SICK SHOW.

3. This show bored me to tears. The plot was a total drag. I don’t care if someone is a lesbian but for heaven sake there is more to life than picking up people for sex, etc.

4. I gave this show a fair chance. I watched the pilot and the next 4 eps. The characters are anorexic, they’re way too focused on each other’s lives (busy bodies from hell on crank), they’re not working nearly hard enough to afford living in LA, and they’re just not that interesting.

5. Way too raunchy! Story line could be good but falls short due to over abundance of porn scenes.

6. This show feeds the desire to go against the physical faculties of our body created to procreate. Society has compromised by creating a “Do it if it feels right” mentality. Immoral behavior feels right too, but it is still wrong. In my book, wrong never has a grey area.

7. i thought the L word was short for The Loser Word. lol

8. I bought this without truly knowing what it was about. When I found out, I threw it away. I am not against homosexuality, I just don’t want to watch it.

9. Those who think this series will aid lesbians in their quest for equal rights are kidding themselves.

10. We’ve got two power lesbians who keep saying, “let’s make a baby.” Two women cannot “make” a baby. This notion is ridiculous.

11. Yes, Jenny needed to die – but was it necessary to make ME want to be the killer?

12.  My advice to the L chicks: get a life or maybe take all that time you spend in despair and do some volunteer work for the underprivileged. Just a suggestion.

13. I watched this show for the first couple of minutes and it became very clear to me what the “L” word means. This is not my kind of show.

14. These self inflicted dejected, disappointed, grieving, heart-sick, melancholy, miserable, bellyachers are the poster children for those groups of trendy home-owning high end European car driving never satisfied with being successful-comfortable-financially-stable so all they do is whine about everything that nobody cares about.

15. It’s a little too much for me — cross-dressers, pregnancy, affairs, etc. It was a bad soap to me. I have no prejudice one way or another, truly. I just couldn’t “get into” the story lines enough to keep me interested.

16. I couldn’t bear having it in my room so I broke it and threw it in a huge garbage next to our house. Hope this review stops you from buying it, don’t repeat the mistake that I’ve done.

17. Turns out lesbians aren’t that interesting.

18. The episode “Lucky” has “provocative scenes” that depict the Son of God, Our Lord Jesus Christ, in carnal situations. The plot seems to be that art can be interpreted by anyone in their own way, art should have free expression, and it is okay to depict someone’s art even if it is offensive to some groups. Well, that being the case, will someone please tell me if in other episodes will there be offensive depictions of Mohammed and Moses? Why is it that art can offend Christians but not Muslims and Jews? I refuse to watch the rest of the episodes.

19. Wanted to know what all the hype was about. Fell aslee. Watching. Bored me and I didn’t even get through half of disc one

20. I hate to break it to those people, but lesbians tend to dress like men, act like men–and look like men. The “hot babe” is about as foreign to the lesbian demographic as “Mexicans” are to the nativist crowd these days.

21. Don’t watch this show with your family. Very sick subject matter. Looks like the L’s deleted my last comment on here. Warning people that this show is sick is wrong now. WoW.

22. The whole point of the series is to show nude women having sex in front of the camera. I’ll bet the actors aren’t even lesbians.


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Riese

Riese is the 40-year-old Co-Founder and CEO of Autostraddle.com as well as an award-winning writer, video-maker, LGBTQ+ Marketing consultant and aspiring cyber-performance artist who grew up in Michigan, lost her mind in New York and now lives in California. Her work has appeared in nine books including "The Bigger the Better The Tighter The Sweater: 21 Funny Women on Beauty, Body Image & Other Hazards Of Being Female," magazines including Marie Claire and Curve, and all over the web including Nylon, Queerty, Nerve, Bitch, Emily Books and Jezebel. She had a very popular personal blog once upon a time, and then she recapped The L Word, and then she had the idea to make this place, and now here we all are! In 2016, she was nominated for a GLAAD Award for Outstanding Digital Journalism. Follow her on twitter and instagram.

Riese has written 3017 articles for us.

124 Comments

  1. Personally, I watched the entire show wondering why no one wanted to murder shane. Shane broke the hearts of multiple people, never walked into a room with out some one crying, broke up marriages, families, etc. I get the jenny was a bitch in final two seasons. But shane never had any redeeming qualities and she was a very popular character. I still don’t understand.

    • I share the same unpopular opinion about Shane as you do. I just never thought why people thought she was God’s gift to lesbians. She wasn’t that hot to me and her behavior made it worse. Give me Carmen or Tasha any day. And I personally thought Jenny was an absolute fucking riot those last two seasons. I howled with laughter during every scene.

    • My friends and I debated Shane. We all came to the conclusion that we loved her so much because we all know that Shane girl and have mostly been heart broken by her. What happens to the Shanes of the world anyway? I’m really curious as to why, having known more than one, why I still loved her character. Could be because I just thought she was super hot. *shrugs* I’d rather not delve any deeper into that question lol ;)

    • I enjoyed her as a character for most of the series because, while she was a terrible woman to get involved with, she was a hell of a friend. But then she hooked up with her best friend’s girl, so that certainly canceled that out quite a bit. D’oh!

      • Yeah that was kind of the moment where I felt they’d totally lost all since of direction. And I wasn’t even watching it on DVD after the second season. I was content to keep reading the recaps on AfterEllen and if an episode or moment sounded somewhat good (which became less frequent as time went on) I’d just catch the scene on youtube or something.

        The theory I have about melodrama is that it only works if you stay true to the characters and The L Word really proved that for me. You can have the story twist and turn any which was you like a ship at sea, but the masts have to adjust to the changing winds. They can’t just take on whole other forms just because them to do whatever shakes up the plot!

      • When though? When was she a good friend? I mean ok if i’m wrong, and i’m probably blocking out those memories because i hate her, but i can’t think of a single time Shane was a good friend.

    • My friend and I have an ongoing theory that Shane is very popular because she’s the closest thing the show has to butch. I really don’t get it, nor do I get the Bette and Tina love. They are, by far, one of the worst TV couples, gay or straight. They reminded me of the friends I have who are great apart but are awful together, and your group of friends continually cringes when they announce they’re back together for the sixth time.

    • We like Shane because she’s simultaneously in pain and self-aware. I feel like humans are super drawn to vulnerability so long as it’s not inappropriate/desperate. But I agree, Shane did some awful things and seriously skewed my idea of how to be desirable to other women. Pro tip: acting aloof and uncaring doesn’t make you hot, it just makes people think you’re a weird jerk.

    • YESSSS YEEEEESSSSSSSSSSSS OMG MAE FINALLY SOMEONE ELSE THAT UNDERSTANDS MY TOTAL HATRED OF SHANE!!!! Good grief she was a drug-fueled, egomaniacal, poorly-coiffed idiot. All the way through the show everyone was raving about how she’s so hot (really don’t see it, but to each their own) and about how she treated women badly but it was ok because she was such a good friend. WHEN??? When was she a good friend? I can’t remember her doing a single thing for someone else.

      Also she totally went to prison for fraud (burning down Wax and taking the insurance money) after the show was over.

  2. woooowwwwwww.

    I mean we all have the right of free speech but damn…know when to comment and know when to let it go.
    if you have something mean to say that is going to offend enough people, put it on a piece of paper then burn or shred the paper but don’t post it.

  3. Christians and/or homophobes are hilarious. “This show accidentally ended in my dvd player so I watched all 5 seasons and HATED every minute of it I SWEAR!!!”. “This is so offensive to our lord and savior, one star. *queues up next episode*”

    • P.S. And to number 21, who even looks at the dvd cover of this show and goes ‘I think I’ll sit down with the kids and watch this’? Just what the hell? Not every tv show is meant to be family entertainment.

    • Gee, could it be because the Christians on this show are easy caricatured targets, while this show would never *have dared* to go after Muslims, people who *kill* the lesbians they find, rather than merely disagree with them?

  4. “I couldn’t bear having it in my room so I broke it and threw it in a huge garbage next to our house.”

    i didn’t own the dvds, i only watched this show on netflix, but this is exactly how it felt to be me when i was finally done

  5. You would think one would read the synopsis of the show before they started watching it, no? To be fair I started watching the L Word around the end of season 1. Part of the reason I watched it was a similar reason to #1(saw it in a review that said something to that fact). That and I live in L.A. so there were adds all over & the attractive cast sold me.

    On a side note, I just found out one of the head tech writers for the Wall Street Journal(Joanna Stern), met her wife on Twitter looking for other L Word fans to discuss the show with. So, the L Word connects and saves.

  6. “Storyline could be good but falls short due to over abundance of porn”

    perhaps this person got their intended review backwards? like maybe they meant “porn could be good but falls short due to over abundance of storyline”

    if that was not the case, I desperately hope this person has since had the opportunity to view other television programs. or maybe even just a well-written commercial? because honestly I saw an insurance ad the other day that had better dialogue and emotional payoff.

  7. A lot of the Web 1.0 crowd floats around places like Amazon and Yahoo. I posted a review about a game on Amazon that earned a low rating due to lack of marriage equality. A good amount of commenters were from the Applebees crowd saying the typical ignorant stuff.

  8. *facepalm* 18 really doesn’t watch the news, do they? Uh, hello? Muslims, Charlie, bombs, death threats, shootings?

    These reviews make me want to watch The L Word just to see how disappointed I’ll really be.

    • Tell me about. I’ve heard that kind of talk before. Of course you can find images that are offensive to Jews or Muslims, if you actually bother to look for them. There are some people so warped up in the own religiosity they think the rest of the world is supposed to be working for them or against them.

      • Well, if they missed the hordes of Muslims attacking the American Embassy in Egypt, the drama in Melbourne, and other not so fun episodes I’m sure made it to international television, I can only imagine how deep this person is in their religiosity (never used that word before).

        • What I meant was they are excessively devoted to their own religion and look down on or ignore other points of view. If they are following the religious violence committed by Muslims, than they’re only bringing it up to showcase how much BETTER we Christians are. I can’t remember the exact context, but I think it was in response to statements the POTUS made about The Crusades. Namely that ONLY Muslims use religion to justify violence!
          That makes this talk about how only OUR religious is subject to supposed blasphemy, shows there only thinking about themselves. It’s scary because that’s the kind of talk that really can encourage religious violence. The idea that WE ARE UNDER-SIEGE and everyone one else has the advantage. That sort of mind set is what most violent extremism thrives on, religious or otherwise.

          • I totally understand what you are saying. I grew up (still growing, I suppose) in a conservative Muslim household and community, I actually see this applied to Muslims too. Bringing up crazy Christian cults, The Crusades, whatnot has been used to justify the crazy stuff some Muslims do, almost to say that hey, crazy people are in all religions, like you said.

            I think for a long time I actually thought only Muslims were the subject of religious intolerance and bigotry because my household did have that WE ARE UNDER-SIEGE mentality, and 9/11 didn’t really help. My community stuck and dwelt on these negative issues, completely ignoring anything bad that was happening elsewhere, and it drove a lot of the young people around me nuts. It drove me crazy, although non-violently. There is dwelling unhealthily on an issue, and then taking an issue, looking at the negativity, being constructive about it and altering it. Apparently being upset and angry was all we managed for 14 years. There is what I call Muslim-victim (pretty darn similar to your Christian victims) going on, and it has lead a lot of people to join organisations like ISIS. To be honest, I think Muslims are often served more shit than they deserve, but then Muslims need to get a backbone away from terrorist organisations and stop playing the victim and start fighting —positively, nonviolently— for what they believe in, too.

            So, in summery, what I’m trying to say (what we are both trying to say?) is that the issue here is being so self absorbed in your own victimisation you forget that other people are victims too.

    • I hated everyone too by the end but I stuck it out because I hate starting a show and then never finishing it. I was already fully committed at that point. The only show I have stopped watching by Season 3 is the Vampire Diaries. I am still torturing myself with General Hospital and Grey’s Anatomy.

    • Honestly it’s probably because of The L Word I even learned what “femme” means.

      Couldn’t when we a few customer reviews who naively assumed this show was “so educational?” I expect most customer reviews to be stupid or shallow, but I’d prefer stupid and dopey to stupid and conceited.

  9. “2. To all the men who have daughters…… KEEP THEM AWAY FROM THIS SICK SHOW.”

    Absolutely – send your daughters outside to get some exercise … say, playing softball for a local women’s team, or if your daughter is into a slightly more physical sport, then try the local gridiron women’s team … Yep, don’t watch the series, just go and play the sports.

  10. How funny coming across this thread today. My wife and I literally just plunged into another L Word marathon – starting of course with the unbearable fashion of Season 1!
    We are at Season 3 now.

    And for the record for #13, we’ve watched the show from the very start and it was always very clear what the “L” word meant. What can I say, it’s our kind of show ;)

  11. Astonishing how many of these people are “not prejudiced.” I bet some of their best friends are even lesbians!

    I have this funny little quirk of reading plot summaries before watching things like TV shows. Saves me the trouble of destroying them and burying them in the neighbor’s trash.

    I only do that with the bodies of my enemies.

    • In all fairness, I am not heterophobic, but I would not want to watch tons of explicit heterosexual sex scenes.
      This is why I don’t by a season of DVDs of a t.v. show that I’ve never heard of. That’s actually the part of #8’s comment that I have the greatest problem with.
      (Also, can we get a heterophobic t-shirt? I would wear that shirt.)

  12. I’m so depressed about all these people throwing the DVDs away. I’ll take them off your hands! The DVDs are worth it for all the extras. Jerks.

    Also, who actually purchases a TV show without even knowing its most basic premise?

  13. I thought this would be an appropriate place to say that two days ago I found the soundtrack for The L Word among some CDs my dad had checked out at the library. Last night it was playing during dinner. I HEARD THE THEMESONG COME ON WHILE I WAS EATING MY SPAGHETTI. Is my dad a lesbian. Is the world even real. I don’t know what life is anymore.

  14. Wow, the homophobia in those reviews is disheartening.
    I was expecting something more along the lines of “One star, because I couldn’t give it minus stars, due to incredibility, because WHO LEAVES Carmen de las Picas Morales at the altar?” or “Why did Mr. Piddles have to die???”
    My brother was kind of set on watching the show after I came out, to get a better understanding of “my world”.(Which was actually very sweet of him.)
    I might have told him, that the show was super, duper horrible (imho of TV shows, it is pretty much a train wreck) just so that he wouldn’t be watching all of the sex scenes, thinking, “So, this is what my little sister is up to all the time now.”
    I still cringe at the thought of my family members watching the L Word.
    And that Baby Shower scene.
    I still cringe at the thought of that,too.

  15. 22 is on point!

    I can’t believe the amount of people who bought the DVD having ‘no idea’ what it was about or ‘didn’t know what the L was’. What the hell! – serves ’em right, I’m glad they were horrified.

  16. I feel like I’m the only one who actually loved this show :). It came out when i was in high school and it helped me figure myself out. I actually liked Jenny’s character development though the seasons.

    I adore shane! How could you not ;)

    • Same for me, but I watched it during my second year of college! It was kind of my saving grace while I was figuring out that I’m gay. I was acting as social chair of my big southern sorority by day, marathoning the L Word at night…

  17. I tried to watch the show and frankly would have to agree with this review
    “3. This show bored me to tears. The plot was a total drag. I don’t care if someone is a lesbian but for heaven sake there is more to life than picking up people for sex, etc.”

  18. The only “boring” season was Season 6. That should’ve never happened. Replacing Dana with Max was also a mistake. And yes, Jenny’s melodramatic ass was annoying from the jump (especially those godawful writing scenes).

    But aside from that? Loved every minute of it. A show doesn’t have to revolve around d1ck to be interesting…unless you’re a boring, self-obsessed straight person that is.

  19. Whoa I couldn’t even through this list, that is some pretty horrible homophobic shit there.

    And the L Word…hmmm it had a time and a place but I prefer now to pretend like I don’t remember what happened after Season 3. And also Shane wasn’t a jerk, and actually had some character development and married Carmen and they lived happily ever after. The End.

  20. I have to agree with number 4, 12, and 11 :) Also I’m pretty sure 17 was written by someone queer, who observed that having gay characters doesn’t make their drama any more interesting than straight drama (okay maybe a little).

    For me though it was the classism and transphobia evident with Max’s introduction to the group that really made me stop watching. Oh and biphobia. Oh and gender policing. These are the mean girls of the queer world.

  21. Personally I’m stunned so many people bought a whole dvd/box set accidentally-on-purpose without-a-clue what the series was about. They’re either illiterate, or was subconsciously drawn to lesbian storylines.

  22. The only comment that mattered, “I understand that Jenny HAD to die. But was it necessary to make me WANT to be the killer?” Yes. I hated Jenny so much. Sorry. She’s not feminist or interesting or anything of value. She was horrible. Like really.

  23. Ummm…has #20 ever actually MET a lesbian? It doesn’t sound like it because I can 100% guarantee that we do NOT all ” dress like men, act like men–and look like men”! I am a 100% lezzy that hates pants and wears make-up and high heels every, single day. I’ve never been mistaken for a man in my life!!

    Geez, how insulting can they be? Lesbians come in all shapes and styles just like straight people do!!! Stupid idiot!! LOL!

    As for the rest of the comments – all I could do was laugh; and then cue up my DVD player to watch it all again! :)

  24. “We’ve got two power lesbians who keep saying, “let’s make a baby.” Two women cannot “make” a baby. This notion is ridiculous.”

    soooo I’m assuming that particular review was written by Melvin Porter?

  25. 14. These self inflicted dejected, disappointed, grieving, heart-sick, melancholy, miserable, bellyachers are the poster children for those groups of trendy home-owning high end European car driving never satisfied with being successful-comfortable-financially-stable so all they do is whine about everything that nobody cares about.

    This one is actually true. A lot of the melodrama was that bougie boredom kind

  26. Okay, they’re bad comments but number 11 is totally legit though. Just putting that out there. We know what you mean, 11. We’re right here with you. The rest of you comments, go away.

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