If You’re a Dandy and You Know It DapperQ is for You

Jamie’s Team Pick:

In the next couple of months I’ll be attending two lesbian weddings, one of which has a “Kentucky Derby style” theme, and I’ve been debating what to wear.  Google image searching “twee” and “bowler hat”  wasn’t sufficient fashion advice so dapperQ and their weddings section is a welcome discovery.

photo credit: dapperq

The website DapperQ describes their mission as ” a visibility project that celebrates the inner and outer beauty of masculine-presenting people of all colors, shapes and sizes” defining a dapperQ(n.) as “a transgressor of men’s fashion. An authentic, courageous genderbender who uses fashion as a means to expressing our ever-evolving capacity to advance change.” AKA Lots of good stuff happening here.

For example: Remember Katie Miller, the West Point Cadet who resigned because of Don’t Ask Don’t Tell? Check out the dapperQ interview with her  where she discusses her decision to cut her hair, the resulting style transformation and how this has since increased her dating prospects exponentially. (In case being an out advocate for gay rights and hanging out with Rachel Maddow didn’t do the trick.)


photo credit: dapperQ

I’m also enjoying a new feature series on dapperQ, Owning It! which “spotlights everyday dapperQ’s who rock their own style.” The photo below is from the first part of the series Owning It! Featuring Sam.

photo credit: dapperQ

Be sure to check out their How-To video section for advice on topics like How to Tie A Bow Tie and How to Buy A Men’s Dress Shirt that Fits.

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Jamie J. Hagen

Jamie lives in Boston and is currently a PhD student in Global Governance and Human Security at the University of Massachusetts Boston. She is a freelance writer and also a team associate for the Boston chapter of Hollaback!.

Jamie has written 76 articles for us.


  1. I was actually just on their website last night getting inspiration for a secondhand shopping expedition.


    Just kidding I love you.

    I also love their how-to-tie-a-bow-tie video. Now I just need to find a bow tie.

  2. Okay, I just have to say that the picture on the front page for this article is from Marimacho, which is an awesome clothing line for those who are inclined towards the dandy style of dress. And, I know them! Crystal and Ivette are great!

  3. I tried being dapper once and I liked it. Sadly, my ensemble was mostly borrowed and I’m having trouble finding my own (cheap)dandy gear. Should I let my inner Oscar Wilde wither away?

    – Desperate Autostraddlin’ Novice Dandy, Yo

    • Thrift stores! you can often find some amazing things in genuine thrift stores, not in marked-up-vintage-boutique stores. also, H&M and Express Men’s have pretty nice dandy clothes, and sometimes they have deals or sales. I’m slooowly building up my dandy collection mostly through these means, cause I’m broke.

  4. STORY TIME!!!

    When I was a young(er) lad I wore skirts and looked a hot mess in them. I didn’t know how to wear them and I felt silly. One day I was watching the “Talented Mr. Ripley” with Jude Law and Matt Damon and something about the wardrobe clicked with me and I said to myself, “dammit I am going to be like Jude Law (clothing wise)!1111!!!”

    Like crazed sexy homogay beast I went to the nearest Nordstrom (Rack-I’m thrifty!)and bought all the things that I could afford to be dapper and dandy.

    I felt confident, sexy and endearingly pretentious(jk)as I walked through the halls with my wingtips, matching three piece suit and a pocket watch I saw at a garage sale. I was reborn and felt like a sexy Booker T. Washington or someone from the Harlem Renaissance. Just. So. Dapper.

    I am addicted to the DapperQ site and I am glad AS covered it. GO AS, you sexy beast!!!

    The end.

    • I really like this story. I was bracing myself for the part where it all went horribly wrong, and it never. did.

  5. Seriously as a word of caution:

    For those who are Dandy sometimes the sex appeal and swag can be a bit much and things happen….sexy awkward things.


  6. “(In case being an out advocate for gay rights and hanging out with Rachel Maddow didn’t do the trick.)” Oh, god. I laughed so hard.

    This is going to go in my bookmarks, definitely. It also makes me want a lesbian wedding SO BAD. Love the Workin’ It section.. heh

  7. Thank you for introducing me to this!!

    I’ve recently been having identity crises trying to find ‘professional’ style clothes for a new job. This is exactly what I needed! I’m going to peruse this site and be ready to own my style!

  8. Incidentally, some friends and were just discussing that, rather than being gay or queer or lesbians, we want to be referred to as fancies. I like to view myself as a fancy, and now I can add dandy to my alternate ways of describing myself. Thank you for that.

  9. Dear Jamie,

    Thanks soooo much for this shout out! Your post generated more than 2,500 views in 3 days. You got the power and we are grateful you shined the light our way.

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