GOP Candidate Michele Bachmann Latest Victim of GLITTERBOMB

Michele Bachmann, mutual enemy of the gays and GOP presidential candidate, was leaving the stage after giving a speech at the RightOnline conference, a conservative media convention in Minneapolis when, like the great American heroes Newt Gingrich and Tim Pawlenty before her, Bachmann was attacked with glitter! Oh, the humanity!

Minneapolis gay-rights activist and lawyer Rachel E.B. Lang approached Bachmann after the representative’s speech and hurled glitter at her from a small container. As security escorted her away, Lang yelled, “You can run, but you can’t hide,” in reference to Bachmann’s ties to “You Can Run But You Cannot Hide” youth ministry, which is pushing for a same-sex marriage ban and for church-things to be hip among teenagers who would rather be smoking weed.

Here’s a video of Glitter Armageddon ’11:

GetEqual later released a statement, in which Lang said,

“My response to Michele Bachmann’s hateful and anti-gay rhetoric was light-hearted, but these issues are very serious… Bachmann’s support of groups like You Can Run But You Cannot Hide show exactly how extremist she is — she in no way represents the values of Minnesota and certainly does not represent the values of America.”

Bachmann is about as right-wing as it gets when it comes to LGBT rights. She isn’t just anti-gay and -women’s rights; she believes that being gay is “part of Satan” and that Planned Parenthood is “the Lenscrafters of abortion.” Her serious candidacy hurts my feelings, so I’m glad that she became the third GOP presidential candidate to “suffer a glitter attack.”

I hope they keep letting hippies into these events and that Sarah Palin is next.

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Grace Ellis has been writing and making hack-job graphics for Autostraddle since 2011 and is a co-creator and co-writer of the comic book series Lumberjanes. She is mostly an intern in name only. (Mostly.) She lives in Columbus, Ohio because why anything. Also, she wants to write the Black Widow movie and feels like if she just keeps telling people, eventually she will be allowed to do it. She has a Twitter and a Tumblr, both of which are pretty above average.

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  1. Agreed, that was kind of anti-climatic. Bachman needs to get like a massive container shot at her via gay-cannon patrols.

  2. They need to start using full canisters of the tiny, tiny glitter. That shit NEVER goes away…. she’d have had sparkly hair for like a week.

  3. I think glitter is becoming quite the fashion statement among the uberconservative crowd.

  4. I feel like that was… ineffective. I don’t really see what this accomplishes. On the surface, it’s kind of funny, but I feel like this whole glitter thing creates more hostility than anything else.

    • The fact that it was totally ridiculous is true, but the point of the matter is that it calls attention to why someone would want to waste their time doing this, which in turn puts the spotlight on Bachmann’s hate policies. Yeah, it’s silly, but the attention is still there.

  5. The phrase “hurled glitter” is absolutely scintillating. I liked this, I liked this a lot. And on a side note, Lang is totally adorbs.

  6. In fact it was funny. That background music, was so circus, haha, srry. And that’s an original and cool way to protest

  7. she should have waited until bachman got off the stage. buuuut, it was still cool and i appreciated the background music

    • I like that she did it while Bachman was on the stage, she just needs to practice her throwing arm a little. Or bring a glitter cannon.

      The fanfare music was appropriate for the clown she is, it should be played for all of the GOP frontrunners. It goes well with glitter.

  8. This somehow reminded me of the whole deal with witches & water. I thought the glitter might make her melt.

  9. we need Coach Sue Sylvester with her twin glitter cannons in these situations. That would make an impact.

  10. i know this is all serious and stuff and i love this article.

    but the only thing i can think of is that GLITTERBOMB is a dope ass name for a girl party…

        • i’ll just be on stage blowing glitter bubbles. wait…that sounds kinda uncomfortable…

          • you could get a bubble gun. with GLITTER.

            like the dairy queen commercial. “we don’t just blow bubbles, we blow bubbles with kittens in them”

  11. I feel like more glitter and waiting until she got off the stage would have been more visually effective. And that shaking little screech of, “You can run bu you can’t hide!” as she was being man-handled away was underwhelming.

    I get the point of all this. And I commend her and think she has a lot of guts to try that. But I feel like it doesn’t make the positive impact she had intended.

    One glitter-tossing activist at a pro-Bachmann event isn’t going to shame that terrible woman. She doesn’t view gays as human enough to feel shamed by them. It might even result in strengthening her resolve that she’s right. And the media will inevitably spin it to make the activist look crazy.

  12. The fact that someone who says with no sarcasm that ANYTHING is “part of Satan” can be a viable presidential candidate is depressing.

    • Well, she’s not very specific on which part of Satan it is. If being gay is like, his toenail or something, you’d think she could let it slide.

  13. am i the only one who giggles a bit when i hear “Lenscrafters of abortion”? it’s just such a funny phrase to think of. its obvs wrong, but like why not walmart or something? why choose Lenscrafters? it makes me chuckle.

      • The only slightly fun part was when I realized the date was in a nosedive, so I started talking about everything from how hooved animals often have rectangular pupils to human sacrifice. After a while I had to leave though, I could not abide that level of unfun-ness.

  14. Let’s arrange an event in which Michele Bachmann’s speech is attended only by butch homos. Like tell everyone else that it is cancelled, and she looks out into the crowd and it is a few hundred of us.

    I personally would not waste my time at such an event, but I’m just saying.

    • And some nuns. Butches and nuns = opening the Gates of Hell for Bachmann, probs.

  15. That sounds like something fun to do on a Thursday. “I’m bored, let’s go glitterbombing.” Has anyone thought of doing this with skittles? That’s right, “Respect the rainbow, taste rainbow.”

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