Friday Open Thread: House, Pajama, Dance, Rooftop, Rent — What’s Your Favorite Summer Party?

feature image via Shutterstock

Hello road warriors, nymphs and radical debutantes! Welcome to this week’s Open Thread. We’ve had an exciting week. We saw Furiosa the Movie in theaters, used tarot cards to guide our self-care practices, and figured out that we’re all wondering what she’s doing when she’s not texting you back. So many things were accomplished and still the beautiful, extended, Memorial Day weekend is upon us. You know what that means for us in the States: beaches are open, people are on holiday and it’s time to do the rounds at all the first-weekend-of-summer parties.

harry potter gif

I’m not talking about boring hetero parties fueled by drinks with names like Lemon Lime Strawberry Hennessy ColadaRitaBloodyLongIsland, where dudebros are acting a fool and in less than six hours the entire thing will be covered in vom and passed out people. To me, that’s not a party; that’s a dangerous, stinky, hot mess. Or just something weird where Zac Efron works his poom poom.

zac efron shimmy

I’m talking about queer parties with brujas, loverbois, Harry Potter heads, and geeked out cyborgs. Parties where introverts have a space to be quiet and Extroverts have the dance floor.

We Party Like This:

Hot Rabbit Party NYC

Hot Rabbit Party NYC

And Like This:


Somewhere in Portland

Tonight, I’m going to a Bad Lesbian Movies On Netflix Party and I wish you all were coming with me. It’s so chill. There’s a mix of sober and non-sober folks, introverts, extroverts, inbetweenaverts, and nice jumble of ethnicities and identities. This shit is gonna be so v. chill and still it’s the first party of the summer for us. The only way it’d be better was if it was also a slumber party.

Princess Nokia's Pajama Party

Princess Nokia’s Pajama Party

So how do you party, baby tigers? Does it have to be loud, sweaty, and sexy? Or are there only two people at your party, and you’re one of them? Are you light as a feather and stiff as a board? Do you dance? Do undertake the very important job of holding up the wall at a party? Is a party filled with you and your baby and your friends and all their babies? Or are you naked and dancing with non-baby-having friends right now? Tell me. Also, got any safe for work party pics? Probs not, right? Here’s one from me!

The We-Got-Kicked-Out-Of-The-Movies Battleship Party

The We-Got-Kicked-Out-Of-The-Movies Battleship Party

Also, as always, please use the thread to share a week in your life. I’ve got two job interviews next week and my best little homie is napping on my couch right now. I’m happy and it’s weird. So tell me happy things, anything that made you smile this week.



Ain’t no party like an AS party cuz we party on top of a fucking mountain.

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Gabrielle Rivera is an awesomely queer Bronx bred, writer, spoken word artist and director. Her short stories and poems have been published in various anthologies such as the Lambda Award winning Portland Queer: Tales from the Rose City and The Best of Panic! En Vivo from the East Village. Her short film "Spanish Girls are Beautiful" follows a group of young Latina and Caucasian girls who like girls as they hook up, smoke up and try to figure sh*t out. She also freelances for while working in the film and television industry. Gabrielle is currently working on her first novel while bouncing around NYC performing spoken word and trying to stick it to the man.

gabby has written 102 articles for us.


  1. It’s Eurovision on Saturday so like most of the continent I will be at a Eurovision party, where, just as our ancestors did, we will use vast quantities of alcohol to overcome the fact that Eurovision makes for some of the most boring TV in the history of the world.

    • oh my goddess, EUROVISION! i’m so jealous that y’all have that, like seriously. I want to go to your eurovision party. wait, why boring? isn’t it also campy and exciting?

      • Because the voting process takes longer than most general elections. But this year I’m going to an awesome queer bar where they are doing some kind of thing where they have the show on a screen and a drag queen comments over the top. Not quite sure how but am looking forward to it, although nothing can beat last year and Conchita

        • link plz? last eurovision i can remember off the top of my head was something about an operatic vampire dude or something.

    • But the voting is the best part!! I am the only person I know who likes it, and I have loved Eurovision since I was old enough to watch television. The music is awful, the fashion is awful, everything is so bad, and it makes my heart sing.

      I made everyone watch it with me last year (it was held in right down the street from me, here in Copenhagen), so I’m not sure I’ll be able to coerce them into it again this year. The year Norway finally won though… it was glorious… so glorious!

    • I am so down for Eurovision, you have no idea. \o/ Considering I’m only going to be watching with my partner (as opposed to the usual battalion of reluctant friends and friends-of-friends) the 20+ snacks and numerous types of booze I’m planning and prepping will be excessive as hell, but if Eurovision doesn’t give you license to be excessive, what does? At this point, I feel like some streamers and balloons would be in order. Fireworks? Fireworks are an A+ idea, right? Yay fireworks! Yay Eurovision! \o/

    • Missus and I cancelled other plans when we realised it was Eurovision, it’s a Party for two we have dubbed “Gay Christmas” it’s the most camp awful brilliant thing and Conchita Wurst will be fabulous so there’s that to look forward to. Eurovision parties where people have to bring food/beverages from a country performing are also good fun.

  2. A party for me involves sitting on the couch with my dog, watching Netflix.

    I went on a date (!) this week. I’m going on a second date (!!) next week. What is my life? She’s probably reading this. *awkward potato*

    I went to the gym today, and we play a name game at my gym (I go to a weird gym), and we each had to say what food or beverage we’d bring to a (hypothetical) Memorial Day BBQ Party. I said I’d bring a watermelon. What would you bring?

    Also, I wrote the lyrics to 2 new songs this week and have been super productive. Auditions for my play were this week, and rehearsals start next week. I’m on my phone right now, but I’ll totally share info if any of y’all want to come see it. It’s a totally queer-lady play called “Present Tense”, and it will be performed at the Radioactive Festival of women playwrights on June 11 and 13.

    You rock. Don’t ever change. -Lizzie McGuire

    • i’d bring guacamole and chips. like you can’t go wrong with either of those things. cheap, tasty, now i want some.

    • I would bring homemade limeade, because it’s sewwwwww goooooodddd *insert heart-eyes emoji*.

  3. hellooooooooo cats and kittens!

    I like parties! I used to be the go-to party host, then I moved out of my house with a hot tub and in with my gf, and she is intense about clean the house has to be before we have a bunch of people over and we have a high maintenance dog, and that’s not super fun for people.

    A lot of my friends these days, they’ll have parties of under 8 people at their house, but if it’s gonna be more people than that they more often do a happy hour situation or go out someplace, just because the amount of time and prep and cleaning and whatever isn’t worth it to folks. Which I feel sorta bad about, but also I definitely see my friends! We just mix it up with being at each other’s places vs out in public- we had a bowling brunch a few weeks ago-this spot does 2 free games of bowling if you have breakfast there, it was super fun!

    I think that’s what is the thing with me about being an oldster, like I saw my friend a couple weeks ago for literally 45 minutes, because it had been two weeks and we missed each other, but I was working till 8 and she had to pack and go to bed at 9:15, so I sat on her bed and ate chicken teriyaki and caught each other up. It was sweet, we’ve been friends for a long time.

    Mostly I do a lot of porch time with people in the summer- we have a pretty nice porch with rocking chairs, and some of our friends have decks, and we spend a lot of time chilling outside with some wine or iced tea (really into iced tea lately) and enjoying the mellow sunny evening.

    I like hanging out, but party sort of ups the ante, like if somebody says “party” then I am more likely to be like “should I bring something over” or “should I dress a particular way.” Which isn’t stressful, it just means I gotta put on something cute and bring a decent six pack over.

    It’s my birthday in a couple weeks and this year I am just having a drop-in-when-you-want-to at my house with snacks and some stuff to drink but if gets to be around dinner time we’ll order pizza or something but THIS IS GOING TO BE AN EASY PARTY. and nobody will starve, we always make too much food.

    • oh man a birthday porch party sounds sooo good. you basically described my dream life, minus the high-maintenance dog – omg sorry, pup! nervous dogs make me nervous and i feel bad for them but then i’m on edge too and it just creates more weirdness.

      but yes, drop in, eat and order pizza, is f*cken golden. ay. where’s my teleportation device?

      • yeah dude. you are invited to pizza on my porch anytime you get your teleportation device in gear. sometimes gf even makes pizza, she got fancy pizza stone she likes to mess with.

  4. I love just packing a cooler of cheap beer (Usually Narragansett or PBR, but I’ll put a few cans of Busch, so I can ask my friends if they “want Busch”) heading to the beach and tossing a football around while listening to throwback tunes. If that makes me a dude bro while rocking a bikini top, board shorts, a snapback and a beer can covered with a koozie that says “Beauty is in the Eyes of the Beer Holder” then I embrace my broness. That being said, bad movie parties are awesome. I remember back in college we used to do things like that on Friday nights. We also used to have parties where we would analyze ’70s and ’80s porn. I went to an art school, so it was normal…I kind of want to throw parties like that again!

    • all hail you, unapologetic beach bro, describing a sweet ass summer day.

      yo, i tweeted once about wishing I was a brewer so I could name my beer DYKE and then people could go to bars and order dykes all night.

      • We might be spirit animals! I wanted (still do) to create a craft beer brand called
        LesBrau. Bull Dyke Bock, Lipstick Light Lager, Sapphic Stout, and Gold Star IPA would be our launch beers. I’ve given this A LOT of thought over the past 5 years or so. Haha.

        • LesBrau sounds amazing! Also art college we would watch bad porn and turn the sound down and do the voices…less analysis more wtf is this insanity at 2am.

    • That sounds a great idea to analyze porn for the 70s and 80s. Where there any interesting flicks or stories from that era? Any queer films?

  5. My favorite kind of party is a game night! Whether it’s board games or video games or some other games. Whatever. I like sitting down with drinks of varying ABV values and plenty of snacks and getting all my favorite people in a room with controllers or dice or cards in their hands.

    I suppose game nights aren’t exclusive to summer, but summer opens up the option of grilling something on the back deck, then making s’mores over The Fire Pit of Dubious Legality, and then playing games on the deck on the folding table in the dying summer sunlight.

  6. I like “we shall lounge under the trees” parties, all hours of the day or night. I also like chill parties where people put baby animals in my lap. Does this happen to other people?

    • like a petting zoo party? cuz i’m afraid of adult goats but lil goats, kids if you will, are totally ok and non-scary.

    • I really like those kinds of parties too! though people have more baby humans these days and fewer kittens.

  7. I’ve now just flashed back to a party I held at 15..

    I set up the corridor with a curtain in front, no lighting, filled rubber gloves protruding from the walls, cling film (Saran wrap) hanging down at head height, and recorded spooky noises. I had the cling film and rubber gloves on strings so that once everyone went into/through the corridor I could pull then away as I turned the lights on and it would seem as though it had all been in their minds.

    I also decorated the entrance as though for little kids, with pin-the-tail on the donkey etc, and greeted everyone in a frilly party dress saying “I haven’t had a party since I was six, I hope this is alright”.

    On reflection, I find it astonishing I had any friends. I was a weird theatre child.

    I also went to a friend’s 1920’s murder mystery party, where my character was a dapper guy who smooth-talked the ladies (I was 14 then). Which my best friend told me I did far too well…..*sigh* so many clues I never picked up on, and parties that could have been even more entertaining.

    • all of this sounds incredible. this is the part that messed me up: I had the cling film and rubber gloves on strings so that once everyone went into/through the corridor I could pull then away as I turned the lights on and it would seem as though it had all been in their minds.


      • It sounds so much more psychotic when it’s read back to me…!

        I feel as though I should be paying for therapy for anyone who attended.

  8. Hey y’all, I’m stoked for this weekend! I’m having a dinner party/sorta-housewarming tomorrow night because I moved in with my ladyfriend (OH MAN GROWN UP STEPS). So we’re making Korean fried chicken and waffles because duh.

    Sunday we’re gonna go see Mad Max, Avengers, and Pitch Perfect 2 (again) because she loves that I love action movies and that’s cool.

    Buuuuuuut what I’m really bouncing around about is that we got tickets to the #nofilter show in Chicago for this Thursday ahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh!!!

    Stay safe this weekend and have a good time, y’all. Oh, and Gabrielle what is on your Bad Lesbian Movies list?

  9. I had a bummer of a week, feeling kinda sick an depressed, but I manage to keep on top of cleaning and working on resumes so I’m really really looking forward to having a graveyard picnic this Sunday with a few close friends I haven’t seen in a while. As perfect for this time of year as could be.

    (Currently accepting encouragemt that the job search might eventually reward my hard work with maybe even just one interview…?)

    • Don’t give up on the job search! I remember having to apply for a ton of jobs before getting call-backs, and then suddenly I had ALL THE INTERVIEWS. When it rains, it pours. Pours jobs. Good luck!

  10. Despite being a hardcore introvert, I am actually a big fan of rowdy, boozy parties. House parties are the best, or dance parties at clubs. Anywhere with enough darkness and chaos that I can kind of come and go as I please, either blend into the background and people watch or get a little buzzed and let loose for a bit. The best parties I’ve ever been to were hosted by my bff in my hometown and always ended on her kitchen floor drunkenly singing along to some cheesy, melodramatic songs. We still talk about how good those nights were, actually. (#oldfolks).

    • Yes! Big house parties are actually my favorite as an introvert also. It’s dark, everyone is drunk and there’s no real pressure to be doing something/talking to anyone, plus MAJOR people watching like you said (and bonus because drunk people are more entertaining). Plus if I’m feeling like getting totally drunk (or what that means for me. normal drunk I guess) there’s always going to be a ton of people as drunk or more drunk than me so I don’t have to worry about judgement. Plus you can flirt with people who you probably won’t ever see again, which if you’re like me is a blessing.

      I’ve been getting invited to what I think are going to be boozy/dance music parties that end up being small kickbacks with people I only sort of know and it is the WORST. Lots of awkward sitting/leaning and people trying to make small talk or asking you why you aren’t talking to anyone.

  11. Its Friday!! Next week we will be on the mountain!!! Mt feelings and Klub Deer here I come!!! With the deer cufflinks and tie.

    Half the time I feel really really old too party. But I still manage to be at Deer til it closes. This year I am bringing my gopro so pictures everydayyyyyyyy allllll dayyyyyy.

    Im waiting for my Transformers metal earth to arrive which wont happen til after camp. =( trying to think of what pics I can post this week. Ill be back for that later.

    Also you guys I think I got plAgue early this year. Whaaaaat.

    • take some vitamin C, eat some fruits & pop-tarts, drink mad water and chocolate drank and watch lots of tv so you can feel better for the mountain!

    • BAAAAAAAAACK. So basically I’m feeling better/worse because my sore throat is going away kind of but now I have a serious case of the sniffles. What is this? plAgue before camp??

      Here is a picture of Andy and my wife. He loves to cuddle. Also it’s normal that he kneads the blankets and bed sheets right??? We think he does it to help him sleep?

      Also my car finally had a nose job done! That thing took me a while to get installed. The front isn’t all done yet I still have some headlights in mind to do but I do have a new sticker I’m putting on the windshield and if you’re coming to camp I think some of you will like it =)

      PS my mom told me she likes my car’s look more now. SHe said it looks like Darth Vader. LOL

  12. I live above an art gallery in a cute historical district in my town, and every Friday starting today there is a street fair kind of thing with live music/food trucks/etc. There is a party happening literally right outside my window.

    Tonight is Bon Jovi night. I’m walking outside in a little bit to get a funnel cake.

    • OMG i almost died today when someone drove through my neighborhood blasting Bon Jovi. I only ever hear salsa, reggae, and reggaeton. Living On A Prayer was a wonderful change of pace. enjoy!

  13. I’m standing at one of those little tables at a party as we, uh, speak.
    It’s in a hotel foyer at a con and exudes the charm of a hotel foyer someone is blasting Rammstein over.
    The catch is, though..
    It’s at a con! So, the couple at the table next to me is dressed in very well fitting ST:TNG gear. So now, I’m bascically trying to figure out how many Gin Tonics it takes for me to believe I’m in ten forward, while wiggling my eyebrows every time someone reads my “You’re Being Watched” shirt, which I shall henceforward wear to any and all parties..
    Someone please come and whisk me away!!!
    My ideal party:The very Britney Spear’s “I’m a Slave for You” video, preferably with music along the lines of “Wiggle It”.Hide the children.

  14. The best part of living far north is that it never gets dark in the summer.

    I like the bright, excited barbecues that turn into big, rowdy parties that turn into dance parties that turn into sharing a blanket with your best friend or convincing a cute girl to have breakfast with you. And then you walk home in the sunlight and pull down the shades and go to sleep with no regrets, because the sun would be out anyways.

  15. I am trying to make myself be more active, but these days most of my partying involves me being the DD as my friends blows off steam before he starts his new job out of state. Side note, we go to bars that have good whisky so I have at most 3 old fashions at most. My friend is a light weight, which sometimes is a problem cause he’ll have like 4 mix drinks and then decides maybe it’s time to refund the drinks a little. So, there maybe something to that straight people and vomiting bit.

    So, yesterday a telemarketer called my work and I answered. I kept telling the person please stop calling here we aren’t interested. He kept insisting he will be short, I kept saying no. He was like “ma’am please if you will no need to raise your voice, I will be only 30 seconds.” I abruptly hung the phone up. It’s just like a fucking cis male telemarketer to tell a queer to be quiet.

    On the positive side, last night I met up with a friend at a local queer bar.It was very nice and was surprised to see how many ladies where there. I was looking nice with my jacket on and reddish purple lipstick, and unisex perfume. Sadly, our gaydar must have been off cause we could not tell who was the fruit fly and who was queer, beside the ladies who were making out on the dance floor. I also may have been the only trans person there. :-/

    I took this earlier in the week & thought it had a bit of a queer vibe to it.

    Thank you for reading and viewing my post.

    • Yuck, sorry about the telemarketer.

      Being the only trans person in a queer space isn’t so unusual. Hopefully you were able to just own it!

      That picture of the street art is really cool!

      • Well I tried to own it as best I one could, while spending half the time outside tables having a smoke and people watching. Thank you!

  16. The best parties come with booze and good people. Bonus points if there’s water. Unfortunately I don’t live close to the water or pools are kind of out of the question here.

    This week was awesome because of all the forward momentum: a big anniversary, grad school coming to a close, and made the decision to move to a new city. Fab.

  17. So my favourite party is a pop tart party. There is only one person and a lot of pop-tarts. Sharing is overrated.

    I went to a meeting tonight to share about something that happened to me. It was an LGBT meeting and I was hoping for a queer lady to be in the group, but nobody else showed up, so it was me and a gay dude. This isn’t something I often share… okay, I have never shared this in a public space. I need a safe space to say this. This time a year ago, I was raped by my then-partner. I hate her and pity her. I’m not looking for “poor you” replies. There were very very few resources for me, and in general there are little to no LGBT sex/domestic violence resources. If this is something that’s happened to you, and you want to talk about it, feel free to PM me. I called the rape crisis centre. The woman who answered the phone sounded so fucking similar. And what were my other options? I really just need to say it out loud. I also really just want to curl up in a ball for a few days and cry about how angry and sad I am, and angry that I’m happy that my recovery process began from that moment.

    For the record, this is one of my favourite parties, because we get each other through lots just by showing up. Another favourite is when a bunch of people show up to talk about how and why they stay sober. So that’s where I’m going. Thanks for reading, guys.

    • I’m sure you’ve seen the articles on AS about domestic partner abuse in our community. Those seem helpful. If you need a consensually hug, an ear, and/or lemonade with muddled cilantro we are here for you as your friends. <33

  18. I just really want to say thank you to everyone who posted on my comment on last week’s open thread. This week was busy, and I kept meaning to reply and forgetting, and I’ve been sick and then having sinus problems, so my head’s been everywhere. But it meant so so so much to me, and you’re awesome wonderful people, thank you.

    I’m actually going to a going away party on Sunday, but it’s not queer :( They’re the type of people who use phrases like “divine masculine/feminine”, “we are all one” & the subsequent ignorance of privilege that comes with that. They also use the term “g*psy”. I’ve been having difficulty understanding how I should navigate my relationships with people like this. They’re not bad people, they just say and do things that are sometimes ignorant. And I still do so bad with conflict, that I get scared and never rock any boats. I smile and nod and shut myself up. Even knowing now, with DBT, that there are ways to handle interpersonal things effectively, im still very afraid. I don’t think I trust people, really. I’m often waiting for the shoe to drop, for them to hate me.

    I always just try to be an example, and I post things on fb about us whites and our privilege and how we need to be true allies, (especially after the riots and surrounding protests) but I don’t know if they see, much less read, them.

    • Oh but my favorite parties are usually where I get to get drunk :/ around friends, which is really safe for me.

      And im sad that I don’t get to go to Camp this year ; 3 ;

    • I’m going to a 3 year old’s birthday tomorrow. I’m 98% sure I will be the only queer person there. Certainly the only trans person. She’s the daughter of some longtime friends of mine, and just the cutest, smartest little girl. Fortunately there will be other longtime friends and folks like that present. It should be okay.

      I totally agree with you on the best parties being close friends and a few drinks.

  19. I’m staying in because I just finished my finals and my body and soul need some self-care

  20. I think my ideal party is a dinner party, except without the party. Three to five people, preferably of the queer variety, would arrive just as dinner is ready to be served. We would eat and drink quietly, the silence–never awkward–broken only by the sound of utensils and satisfaction. After dinner, provided no guests have a nut allergy, I would serve Chocoate Hazelnut Macaroon Torte (a specialty of mine) and coffee.

    And then everyone would leave immediately! Unless you (singular) wanna spend the night. In which case…I keep ready-to-be-baked scones in the freezer for breakfast.

  21. For me, parties typically mean beach time… be it a potluck with friends or a book by myself. If only there was wifi so I could also bring netflix…

    My family adopted a boxer puppy this week, so I get to visit and spend most of my weekend playing with a 14lb floppy mess. She’s basically incapable of walking because her paws are too big for her body. It’s adorable.

    • I also got a puppy about two weeks ago. He’s tiny and about 6 pounds, but still super uncoordinated. I love it. Puppies are so awkward and adorable.

      • Yes! My favourite is when she tries to beat up the neighborhood dogs, who are all much larger. She’ll lunge, miss, fall over, and try again. She thinks she’s so ferocious. She also likes to attack the garden monster (known to us as the garden hose). The comedy never ends.

  22. Hallo–longtime lurker first time in the comment pool. And it’s so hard for me to stop myself from bounding through everyone’s posts like a slobbery puppy being all HAI I LYKE YER COMMENT PLZ BE MY KWEER FRIEND PLZ PLZ PLZ I LUV U.

    I am 54 days sober today (yay!) so my partying no longer involves booze. I moved to NYC a few months ago though, and have yet to really explore the queer lady scene in any depth. so if folks have suggestions for lezbiactivities where alcohol consumption is optional, give me a shout.

    Also, I’ve been to Hot Rabbit twice and maybe they’ve both been off nights but I was not impressed! The dancers on the stage were great, but the folks on the dance floor did not seem into it. Maybe I need to go later in the night? Anyway, I need a good reliable place to dance my ass off so if you have suggestions I’d love to hear them.

    Sober Queer Femme (SQF; pronounced Suh-Queef)

  23. I recently moved back into a suite in the same house I lived in previously, so I suppose if I had a party to celebrate that, it would be a house-reheating party?

    On that note, I’ve been spending extravagant amounts of money on stylish furnishings to distract myself from the fact that I’m living on my own and single again for the first time in five years. Though I think I’m more afraid of starting to feel lonely than actually feeling lonely. So far, anyway.

    I forgot how much of a chore it is to feed myself three times every day. How do people find the time and energy to subsist on more than smoothies and toast?

  24. Well, first things first: Phoebe!

    This FOT is kind of timely! So, I’m not a big party gal. I like a small get together with people I know more than a big blowout party. But, I have been wanting to dance lately.

    So last weekend, I went to a party at a friend’s house. I had an okay time. I just feel that maybe there isn’t a whole lot that trans lesbians and gay men have in common? I don’t know, conversation was rough, though everyone was very friendly. But I did find a group of gals, and had a good time once I started hanging out with them. Of course I was talking to a beautiful and tragically straight lady for most of the night. But, she was awesome. So, for me, that party was like C+ as far as me having a good time vs having spent money to prepare a vegetarian chicken salad (chickpeas) and bring the mixings for vodka tonics.

    But, apparently I was something of a hit. People told the host, my friend, that I was pretty, lady like, and friendly. I’m operating under the assumption that”lady like” means I’m a bit proper.

    This was me the night before:

    A friend was doing a photo shoot for a project involving photographs of trans people.

    Tomorrow night, there is a drag king show here in town. I guess I’m going. A group of gals I like is going. I’m not really into drag, but also… THE woman I like is going. I honestly don’t think she’s interested, but we did trade numbers after some Facebook messaging following the party I went to about three weeks ago. But she dated one of my friends, and it didn’t end well, do I’m going to have to split my time, or commit to seeing her or not really seeing her. It’s so tough. Even if she isn’t interested, I think she’s a great person and a cool friend, so it’s not like hanging out with her is bad.

    Who knows, maybe if I’m fabulous and get out, I’ll find someone else who may be interested in me.

    Okay, sorry, last thing! A friend invited me to go shop and help her pick out a bridesmaid’s dress. I’m so excited!

    Okay, love ya gang!

    • You’re incredibly pretty and YOUR DOG. I KIND OF WANT TO STEAL HER. SHE’S THAT GREAT. You must hug her from me; she’s absolutely gorgeous! Don’t worry, I’m not actually a dog-stealer, I just play one on Autostraddle. :)

      • Oh yeah, and thank you! I feel I should say that the selfie was not part of the project, I just snapped it because I felt fabulous after the shoot. I can’t wait to see the actual pictures. : )

    • I always love reading your posts, and I just wanted to share this:
      I saw the post by Phoebe above saying they’d been a long-time lurker, and for one glorious moment I pictured it being your Phoebe. Which was really just kind of wonderful.
      Thanks for all your lovely posts and photos, & have fun this weekend!

      • Is it strange that I thought the same thing when I saw the post by Phoebe!? Wait… wait.. My Phoebe has been laying beside me all evening after our walk. Phew!

        Thanks! I’m glad people like to read what I write, because I really like to share. Transitioning is amazing and something I desperately needed to do, but of course learning about life as a woman when actually living that life is challenging as well as rewarding.

    • Yay for corgis! Your dog is adorable.
      Also, I’d like to echo the sentiment above mine where I had a brief moment where I thought the new commenter, Phoebe, was your dog going rogue and posting on the FOT.

      • She’s the best and I love her so!

        Okay, so I looked over to where she was laying and gave her a wink, and then she winked back.

        Then she blinked another time, so it could have just been a coincidence. But really for like a second I was thinking “AHHHHH! She knows to wink back when I wink at her!”

  25. Dance party all the way.
    Momma says I was born a dancing fool and that is the truth…once I let go, let the music flow through me. I spent an inordinate amount of time in my pre-adolescence and adolescence trying to tune the music out, keep my body still, stoic and hopefully unnoticed. It’s jarring to grow up in ballet ect then do something that feels completely ordinary to ya in the “mundane” world and get comments that suggest who ever becomes my lover will be very happy indeed wink-wink nudge-nudge or a don’t do that in mixed company lecture. Casting a shadow on things that bring you joy b/c the patriarchy, aka the universal experience of womanhood.
    But now I’m 23 and don’t give a fuck if moving garners attention or not. I wanna dance can’t stop me, not even you fucked up socket joint for I can dance in a chair. If it’s music I don’t know the steps to or can’t figure how to dance to, salsa moveset activates.

    My brain finally doesn’t feel like that whiplash feeling one gets after being popped a good one in the face/head are. Nor do I feel burn the fuck out but uh I’ve backed myself into a corner of sorts. All the summer sesh classes that woulda been degree related are snapped up and I’ve lost priority with fall. But having my summer free gives me a chance to pull together the loosy goosy part of my life that need uh pullin? I’m afraid though I’ll just end up wasting my summer reading, watching stupid things and going nocturnal.

    Ehhh I have a query, an awkward query. What do you do as the white partner in a mixed relationship when racial microaggressions or straight up racist bullshit fucking awful jokes occur?
    And your boo just looks like they folded in on themself, but tell you later there’s no problem it’s just so and so being himself ect when you ask politely in private if they’re okay/they need something or you try to assure them they don’t need to hang out with toxic ass people if they don’t wanna.
    Obvious answer is be supportive to their feels and not be pushy or sanctimonious.
    Just I’m one person and my experiences are not the same, being called an ugly ass Asian girl by an eight year old as an eight year old or getting called race traitor are not in the same field, same campus tho.

  26. I went to see Pitch Perfect 2 this week (I have no shame), and the cinema was almost empty. That was the best party of my life! Great opportunity to sing and chair-dance my way through it. But really, I don’t need much to have a great party.

  27. Last summer for my birthday we had an Ice Cream party, it was my 31st and we had all the stuff we loved as kids to sprinkle on top or pour over or mix in. So much fun. Funny thing is my buds still talk about it fondly, it was just vanilla ice cream and treats, board games and a few friends and it was amazing. Over the years I’ve had some more “party” parties, but now I’m enjoying the more chill things in life.

  28. I’m pretty chill when it comes to socialising, especially since most of my social interaction is online. But I went to this awesome uni get together yesterday of different collectives, including the queer collective, and we watched Pride!! It was my second time watching it, and it was probably even better just because everyone else obvs loved it as much as me. Yay Pride. So yeah, pretty much watching movies is my fav party activity.

  29. Parties were never really my thing (thanks, crippling social anxiety!). When I do go hang out with people, it’s usually a pretty low-key gathering at my sister’s house, because she got all the social skills. We usually just hang out with friends and play games. If we end up playing Cards Against Humanity, I always end up being the one that has to explain the heteronormativity card. Fun times.

    Today marks 2 weeks since I got my Watson. He’s such a funny little guy. I mean, this is how he sleeps.

    We usually go on walks each day after I get home from work, but he’s not always a fan. He likes to stage passive protests.

    He also provides fantastic opportunities to send entertaining snapchats to my friends. This one was taken as I was giving him his second bath of the day earlier this week. He just keeps insisting on rolling in gross things, and then gets mad when I give him a bath to clean him up.

  30. Long weekend in Argentina too.

    With my friends we have a tradition, since 2010. We celebrate LGBT accomplishments, the latest was Malta’s GIGESC bill.

    And tonight we’re gonna have a Saint Patrick’s Day Reload, in honor of Ireland Referendum. So, I have my bottles of Bushmills Black Bush, the Guinness and Harp are already cooling and heavy doses of ibuprofen are on the way.

    By the way, we’re anxiously waiting for june’s SC decision, so we’re already looking like crazy for some Bourbon, any suggestions?

  31. I live for a certain monthly queer dance party in Seattle. I really like going out dancing, but I don’t make it out as often as I’d like due to school/money/life etc. I also don’t have a ton of queer pals, and my girlfriend likes it when we go in groups vs. just ourselves. (Where are you, inclusive/nonsnob queer pals in Seattle?) I also dig house parties for the coziness, DIY everything, and people.

    This weekend I’m having a pug party aka I’m watching my brother’s dog while he has fun on vacation. I’m not too mad about it. Penny is a little worried.

  32. Anybody else here hooked on “Penny Dreadful” like I am? I was really, really torn up by last weekend’s episode, and I don’t have anybody to process that with. It was really gut-wrenching — sisterhood, mentorship, passing allusions to queerness, loss, and EVIL EVIL EVIL culminating in violence that I really wish I had looked away from. Also a complex layer-cake of politics and feelings. Lots of feelings, for me. If anybody else had feelings about that episode, I’d like to hear them.

  33. This so easy!! Maryanna finally knowing I am the female who loves her….. and she cuddles me and kisses me and she knows I am supposed to be her lovey gf!!

  34. I’m sick in bed with a cold, so I’m having a party of one! I’m snuggled under a blanket, drinking spearmint tea and watching Pretty Little Liars Season 5. :)

  35. No parties in the immediate future… We close on our new home soon, and we have to do some big fixes right after that. But I am looking forward to relaxed cookout gatherings later this year!

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