Also.Also.Also: “No Slut Sauce for You, Mr. Homophobe” and Other Stories We Missed This Week

The Internet is especially bright this morning, my darlings, because last night I got the Internet in my new apartment that I’ve been occupying without the Internet for about nine days and I was gonna go crazy. Also, because Eli is especially soft these days. Here’s all the stories we missed while I was rewatching The Darjeeling Limited over and over and over again.

This Week In Homophobia

Let’s start in the United States this week, where Obama signed into law a provision with a ‘conscience clause’ excusing homophobes from, well, having to feel bad about themselves. Oops! Too bad those darn Republicans choose to hide stuff like this in the military budget. 

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Closer to home in the Bay Area, The Gay Boy Scout Who Could is the Gay Boy Scout who did – because he’s an Eagle Scout, despite being gay! In Alabama, one more lesbian takes a large leap for humankind by making efforts to destigmatize homosexuality in sexual education curriculums for the state.

I wonder if anyone at The Pentagon knows about all this. Do they know anything about us? Do they really care about us? Why can’t people at the Pentagon read gay websites.

Americablog editors were notified that their website is unaccessible on military-issued computers. Then Americablog uncovered that several websites geared toward progressive causes and LGBT rights, including The Advocate, Good As You, The Human Rights Campaign’s blog, Pam’s House Blend, and Bilerico, have all been banned using a filter labeled “LGBT.” Conversely, websites of antigay news outlets and organizations including the American Family Association, the National Organization for Marriage, and Red State are not blocked.

According to Americablog, the LGBT filter existed before “don’t ask, don’t tell” was repealed in 2011 but has not since been removed. The Pentagon has been notified of the problem as early as summer 2012.

In Ganey Tikva, a suburb of Tel Aviv, a 17-year-old girl was “mobbed and assaulted” for having a “lesbian look.” The group of teen boys that attacked her threw stones at her face, causing injuries. In Nigeria, LGBT people won’t let the bastards get them down and they just keep on partying in order to build community and express themselves as part of a drawn-out survival mechanism in a fucked-up world.

In the end, though, we shall eat our cake. And our pizza, too. And all the homophobes in the world will just have to wait in line.

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Ke$ha is Still Bisexual

Ke$ha is still bisexual.

Appearing on the cover of Seventeen‘s February issue, the 25-year-old “Die Young” singer admits she’s equally attracted to men and women. “I don’t love just men. I love people,” the musician explains. “It’s not about a gender. It’s just about the spirit that exudes from that other person you’re with.”

In the accompanying interview, Ke$ha also speaks out against teenage bullying. “I’m all about standing up to gay/lesbian/transgender bullying, but it’s also about my little brother. He’s 13 and he gets made fun of because he has a stutter. I just have zero tolerance for people making fun of others,” the glitter-loving pop star says.

This Weird Shit Going On W/ Azealia Banks on Twitter: The Micro-Breakdown

OMG have you heard. So here’s what happened: Azealia Banks, who got famous on the Internet, got into an Internet fame fight and went toe-to-toe with Angel Haze, even resulting in some dis tracks – none of which, by the way, even come close to the one I never recorded but definitely wrote two years ago when Lil Carmen was in a Twitter beef with Lil Kim for like, 35 seconds. (She never responded.) When Perez Hilton, notorious Internet bully and sadly one of the first Internet-famous homos in history, tweeted #TeamAngelHaze Azealia Banks took that shit to another level and called him a “faggot.” She remedied the uncomfortable situation by tweeting, “A faggot is not a homosexual male. A faggot is any male who acts like a female. There’s a BIG difference.” Awesome!

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As the situation broke down, Banks apologized on her Twitter with lots of exceptions – saying she isn’t sorry “for Perez tho” and that she “knew what she was saying” and thought it was okay. One of her last tweets about the whole mess? “If u listen to my music and are not offended by the word nigga…. We’re not gonna go here with this faggot shit… We’re just not. Lol.” And at that point, she dropped the mic and walked away. Metaphorically, of course. Janet Mock, writer and activist, shared her thoughts on the whole thing.

Amber Riley’s ALH

Amber Riley got a total alternative lifestyle haircut. And thinks change is good!!

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Homos In Paris, Other European Regions

Vincent Peillon, French Education Minister, is urging 8,300 Catholic schools in the nation to stay neutral on the topic of gay marriage and allow children to escape from their cold, occasionally isolating religious communities unscathed by self-hatred.

It doesn’t seem appropriate to bring the debate over equal marriage rights into schools. I have the deepest respect for the Catholic school system. But, the institution, which is under contract with the state, must respect the principle that everyone has the right to a neutral and free thought… We must never forget that we are dealing with young people and that attempted suicides are five times higher among teenagers who realize they are homosexual than others.

But either way, this one gay French mayor is saying no to marriage so whatever. I wonder what France’s first baby of 2013, who has two moms, has to say about all of this.

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Meanwhile, in Italy, Berlusconi supports gay marriage but is probably lying through his teeth. Or at least exaggerating.

Mo’ Money, Mo’ Episodes

In Hollywood, Liberace’s life is too gay to be made into a film. So HBO picked it up to make sure we controversial homos got our fix. But on the Internet, YOU have the power to fund the videos you want to see in the world! Yes, you! You tiny little ant is this monstrous landscape of our universe, you.

Are you extremely, potentially vengefully, angry at Kim Kardashian for acting on her last hopes for fame by shacking up with Kanye West, only to later on be near the verge of publicly raising his spawn? Then meet Kam. (And fund her existence!)

Creators Fawzia Mirza and Ryan Logan have launched a Kickstarter campaign for Kam Kardashian, which introduces the world to Kim’s fictitious lesbian sister.

Four episodes of the series have already been released, which is plenty of time for viewers to get a solid picture of Kam’s personality. She’s jaded and vicious, likes her whiskey straight, and tells it like it is, with no remorse for her ‘famous’ family. A series of auxiliary characters exist mainly to fuel Kam’s distaste for her estranged siblings.


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Carmen

Carmen spent six years with Autostraddle, most recently as Community Director, Feminism Editor and Social Media Co-Director. She is now the Managing Digital Editor at Ms. , host of Bitch Media's POPAGANDA podcast and Contributing Editor and co-founder of Argot magazine. Her words have also been published by BuzzFeed, ElixHER, Everyday Feminism, Girlboss, Mic, MEL, and Feministing, among others. Her successful work over the last decade in digital feminism—as a writer, social media maven and activist leader—has earned her the titles of "digital native," "intimidating to some," and "vapid and uninteresting." Everything else you need to know about her you can find out at carmenfuckingrios.com.

Carmen has written 1 article for us.

51 Comments

  1. The AZ Banks issue is really interesting. I’m sort of in two minds about the whole thing.

    Half of me thinks:
    Just because Perez Hilton is an idiot doesn’t make using homophobic insults ok.
    And while Banks’ probably sees it as a superficial insult just like the disses in her music, just because you don’t MEAN to be a shithead doesn’t mean you’re NOT a shithead. (as this article discusses http://genderbitch.wordpress.com/2010/01/23/intent-its-fucking-magic/)
    She clearly isn’t homophobic, but someone who reads this spat/hears her music might be, and their behaviour could be reinforced by stuff like this.

    But on the other hand:
    Freedom of speech is important and I don’t like the idea of banning words.
    Reclaiming words like ‘faggot’, ‘dyke’, ‘nigga’ potentially robs them of their power, which would be a good thing.
    This interview with Syd tha Kid (gay girl member/producer of Odd Future) talks about desensitising like this w/r/t their ‘offensive’ lyrics

    but it’s interesting that she chooses not to employ the same tactics in her own music as ‘The Internet’.
    And it would be out of order to excommunicate AZ from society without excluding white people like Fassbender and Sheen, who do wrong things with their actions not just words.

    At the end of the day I still think AZ is cool, so shoot me.

    • I’m probably late to the show but my feelings on the matter of why do so many people (usually white) people) go rabid with POC celebrities when they are homophobic and then LUMP as party of “oh POC/black communities are *especially* homophobic/anti-women/etc. ‘etc!!!!” originated from the whole RiRi and Chris Brown thing.

      I thought it was so fucking rich that the people I knew dismissed RiRi pain as “well black people” and Chris Brown to being a thug. ALL THE WHILE the very people had the same domestic violence in their history, their mothers STILL with their fathers, including my own and yet all this harsh judgment. I’m all too aware of the very problematic things other white celebrities do but it’s hush hush or “you know it’s music, she grew up with black people (yes this is a real thing), it’s art…from South Africa blackface there has a different context (which is true but still…no, nice try)!”

      “[And] it would be out of order to excommunicate AZ from society without excluding white people like Fassbender and Sheen, who do wrong things with their actions not just words.”

      This, this, this!!! Can I add a good chunk of the senate, congress and Mel Gibson!?!

      • I didn’t really mean she was reclaiming it like “I’m a faggot, Perez is a faggot, haha let’s be faggots together and overthrow the homophobes!”

        Did you watch that interview I linked? I guess what I’m trying to say is that we shouldn’t read too much into the politics of what was essentially a throwaway comment and that maybe in the hip-hop world the words I listed have less significance and are less offensive than in other realms. And if people aren’t being offended by stuff, that is good.

        Obviously using someone’s sexuality as an insult is a bit ridiculous since no sexuality is worse than another. Frankly it shows a lack of creativity and reasoning on Azealia’s part, since she has so much material to work with to illustrate that Perez Hilton is a slimy little shit.

        • I’m so over this. In what way is calling anyone a faggot a throwaway comment? I just don’t get why we let people in our own community get away with this based on the sole fact that they’re in the community. It’s offensive, no matter what realm. This should be a big fucking deal. It’s super neat that she’s a great rapper. So is Chris Brown.

          • Okay. I’ve tried to look at it from both sides as you can see from my initial comment. I didn’t say calling someone a faggot SHOULD be a throwaway comment, but that is how she is using it, in a similar way to the countless insults present in her songs.

            I am sorry that you feel offended by her words (and me, probably), but personally I prefer to laugh at rubbish like this than cry. To each her own.

          • Believe it or not side-eyeing can be just as cathartic.

            My personal example: “I love Amanda Palmer!!”
            Me: Oh reallaaay? *side-eyes*

    • I agree with you, I still think Azealia Banks is awesome. I had heard little bits about this story and finally read the xojane article and tried to decipher the point of the original alleged “beef” last night and I mostly just feel that black entertainers are demonized at a higher rate for bad behavior, but ultimately they don’t care. This argument was already getting heated. The point of beef is to spawn creativity (see Jay Z and Nas)through the insults. To be fair Angel sort of lost this fight and it didn’t really lead to much new material. While I don’t love Azealia’s use of that word or her definition (although Perez was being a cunt)I think words do matter, but knowing you are going to take shit from the public about how you react (see Kanye West)just for reacting and being a person of color probably doesn’t encourage you to think twice about hurting feelings. You are sort of screwed either way.

    • I actually don’t see why we can’t exclude them all. The disproportionate reporting on POC folks who do this is definitely a problem, but there is no reclaiming going on in her use of f*ggot, much less in the subsequent transmisogynistic-shit-filled “definition.” She sucks for saying these things, even in passing, just like Sheen, Fassbender, Germaine Greer, Mary Daly, Adrienne Rich, Sheila Jeffreys, Gloria Steinem, Kelly Osbourne, Roseanne Barr, and Perez himself while we’re at it.

      Personally I’m giving none of them a pass, and they can all go to hell. It’s sad and wrong that the white people who say the same shit and worse get a pass. We should not let people forget the white assholes who do this and get away with it every time a POC says something equally fucked up. But still, that’s no reason for me to give AZ a pass for saying shit that hurts me.

      • Ok wait—here’s where I have a problem with the Banks controversy. What she said is NOT in any way transmisogynistic. Because to call it that, you would be saying that trans women are men, as she said “men who act like females.”
        What she said is a douchey comment about effeminate men, gay or straight, and speaks to internalized misogyny (feminine traits are bad, weak, etc) and a patriarchal socialization.

        • Sorry, I definitely got a bit more offended than I should have. But forgive me if I don’t assume that she’s making that distinction when she’s using “f*ggot” in a derogatory way in the first place. It wouldn’t be the first time that women like me have been lumped under it.

        • Did you read Janet Mock’s piece on this? She quotes a song called “Us” by Banks:

          “She got that Adam’s apple and she asked about that fashion/And we passed her with that laughter.”

          Ms. Mock writes :”Again, aren’t trans women just so fucking funny? People can’t help themselves.”

          Let me explain this to you… most trans women (not all, but femme ones) grew up hearing the term faggot thrown at them even more than most gay men (many of whom aren’t in the least femme). Faggot is indeed about MAAB femininity, so yes, the term faggot as she used it has a LOT of transmisogyny built into it, not to mention those other lyrics.

          Again, just because someone is a bi cis woman of color doesn’t give her permission to say that shit. Nor does being a gay cis latino give Perez Hilton a right to say all the transphobic shit he has through the years. (which he, at least, has apologized for).

          • She directed it to Perez Hilton, who is not trans, and is a slightly effeminate man, which led me to the conclusion that her comment was about effeminate men, again, gay or straight.
            As someone who is brown, femininity in the males of our communities are largely looked down upon, and leads to LOTS of violence against them. I can think of five guys I know personally, only two of whom are gay, that have been beaten up because they displayed “feminine” characteristics. One of them is my brother. All of them have had “faggot” hurled at them again and again. I thank God every day that my young brother hasn’t joined the lists of bullied boys who displayed “feminine” traits who ultimately committed suicide.
            These guys might have cis privilege, and male privilege, and in some cases, straight privilege, but especially in POC communities like my own, they still face plenty of discrimination for not being “man enough.” Machismo reigns.

          • It’s about people who are called faggot. Every trans woman of color I’ve ever known was called faggot constantly (even post transition). See, people who call other people faggot in that way don’t really consider trans women to be women, they call them faggot because they have sex with men, and are femme. Sorry about your brother getting that (I know I have, all my life pre-transition) but it’s really not up to you, as a cis woman, to be telling me or anyone else who’s been called a faggot for much of their life whether it was about them or not.

          • Believe what you will, but don’t negate the experiences of men who suffer violence and bigotry due to their “feminine traits.” If you feel this is an issue of transmisogyny, fine, but don’t cancel out the fact that because it was directed at an effeminate man, that makes it very clearly also about perceived femininity in men, gay and straight.

          • She isn’t negating those experiences at all. Yes, this time it was directed to a feminine cis man. But the same “femininity in men is shameful” motivation affects trans women immensely. Because trans women pre-transition, pre-passing, even pre-coming out, would be seen by certain people as “a man wearing women’s clothing,” and therefore a massive target for slurs like “faggot.” You say it’s about “perceived femininity in men, gay or straight,” but I highly doubt people who are using the term “faggot” in a derogatory way are going to care about things like gender identity or preferred gender pronouns. Their definition of men includes trans women.

          • Yes, she did direct it at Perez Hilton, who is not trans*. It is clearly about perceived femininity in men. But guess what? As someone who spent her life up until very recently (when I started blending as a woman better) being called “f*ggot” at least once a week, seeing that shit get thrown around, and especially that definition, hurts me too. And I was seeing a lot of “Oh, this was just a spat” in the comments here. Should I have just shut up? Because god knows NOBODY in the rest of the media will be talking about the offensiveness of these comments to effeminate gay and straight men as trans women’s feelings ALWAYS dominate over them in that sphere, am I right? Noted for next time.

          • Also love the bit about gay men suffering violence and bigotry for being effeminate. Trans women’s stats when it comes to violence are significantly more severe. Not saying it’s not awful when gay men experience violence due to their sexuality or gender expression, but being a trans woman is considerably more dangerous and their deaths receive considerably less attention or sympathy from even queer organizations. My cis privilege could very well have saved my life, or at least a lot of grief, given that I was raised in the Deep South.

          • I didn’t say Banks wasn’t transmisogynistic.
            I said the quoted comment wasn’t.
            There is a marked difference.

    • This is not about “freedom of speech.” Freedom of speech is incredibly important, and I would never support criminal penalties for even the worst forms of hate speech, but Banks’ freedom is not being infringed upon when she’s called out for making homo/transphobic and misogynistic comments. The freedom to speak your mind does not make you immune to criticism – she can say whatever she likes, and we’re all equally free to respond to it.

      Nor is it relevant whether or not Perez deserved it. There is nothing wrong with being gay or with being feminine, nor is there anything wrong with female genitalia. There is something seriously wrong with those things being used as insults, and it shows how deep prejudice runs in our culture that a progressive, openly queer woman would still use them as such.

      The unequal treatment of people of color is obviously a huge problem, but the fact white entertainers are sometimes allowed to get away with similar behavior doesn’t change the fact that Banks said something inappropriate. I don’t think it makes her a bad person, or takes away from her worth as an artist, but her remarks were hurtful to many people and that type of language isn’t OK. I’m not sure why this is controversial.

    • Right, guys…I think I’ve changed my mind a bit about this. Autostraddlers are the best kind of people so if so many of you disagree with me I’ve obviously gone wrong somewhere. I think my relentless optimism got the better of me, and being from the UK – where faggot is a kind of meatball and a fag is a cigarette – my privilege is showing.
      So if you’ll excuse me, I’m gonna go back to my real-life tactic of avoiding conflict in every situation ever. Peace out.

  2. Man this whole AZ thing depresses me, especially since Azealia and Angel are my heroes and I know they were friends at one point so I don’t see why they have to fight…and frankly I’m shocked that Angel used colorist insults against Azealia, because she came out with a Youtube video a while ago talking about how stupid she thinks the “light skinned” vs. “dark skinned” rivalry is. I totally agree with bra that too many white people are going to use this incident as an excuse to espouse thinly veiled racist views, and I’m not giving up on either rapper because I think they’re awesome and inspiring. However, I’m sad that they used such problematic language and that they felt like they had to duke it out via Twitter in the first place.

  3. Hey!
    So, I feel really weird about the definition of “f*ggot”. Speaking as a gayish trans* guy, saying a f*ggot is any male who acts like a female is trans*phobic, misogynistic and generally terrible. I’m really disappointed that the quote got a response of “Awesome!” in the article. She isn’t reclaiming it, she’s just being mean and using a really gross slur with the intent of causing hurt. Being in the community doesn’t give you the right to say f*ggot as much as it doesn’t give you the right to use the t slur. Not. Cool.
    -andy

    • hey! just wanted to say that that “awesome!” was definitely the equivalent of my laughing as so not to cry, and was probably more sarcastic than most of my feelings about the world in general, which is a lot. i totally think what azealia said was not only uninteresting and tired, but completely fucked up and really weirdly out of place with most of her work and her intentions.

      in fact:

      “Being in the community doesn’t give you the right to say f*ggot as much as it doesn’t give you the right to use the t slur. Not. Cool.”

      exactly how i feel.

  4. I wanted to clear up that I personally hate that those words are being thrown around and the trans-mysogny, ew, ew ,ew. Respond to this however you want, BUT time and time again this just been so CONVENIENT as Krissy says for the thinly veiled racism in a lot of the criticisms of being a person of color being an asshat and/or doing bad things when there are white entertainers that do the same thing and I do not nearly hear enough of the white public being as critical. It’s just simply disproportionate, point blank.

    • I’m with you on this. As a femme trans woman, I’m waiting for several white academic feminist icons to get ostracized for their transphobic shit before I worry too much about AZ’s awful definition. I’m cool with going after all of them simultaneously, if anyone’s interested…

      • Alexandra, if it means anything, there are lots of trans women (yes, even white ones) who have been writing about certain white second wave feminists and their transphobic writing for years. . It’s just that, honestly, most people ignored those critiques and didn’t give a damn (or thought we were raining on their ‘real women’ parade, bitter wannabes or Debbie Downers). So, Germaine Greer, Julie Bindel, Adrienne Rich, Mary Daly, Sheila Jeffreys and all the other crew have been criticized for many years, even decades by trans women. Now have cis women bothered to listen without being defensive and dismissive… that’s another issue which has just very recently turned a corner.

        So much has to do with who is bothering to listen to critiques and, moreover, listen AS AN EQUAL. Needless to say, up until very recently, most gay and lesbian publications (and what trans ones there were) didn’t take the issues of people of color seriously nor, most times, even bother to listen. Any change in that is also a very recent phenomena. And needless to say, way too many white people in the trans community view their issues through ‘colorless tunnel vision’ and denial about the intersectionality of issues.

        • Definitely with you in the last paragraph. Anyone watching a TDOR gathering where only white trans* people are speakers while the overwhelming majority of the deaths were people of color should notice something terribly off.

  5. Kesha’s admission that she’s bisexual has made me respect her more. Not that I like her music more than before she came out, but her openness helps.

    My grandmother went to high school with Liberace. Yes, that Liberace.

  6. In totally unrelated news, does anyone wanna talk about the Les Mis movie?

    specifically, Eponine as played by Samantha Barks and her total babe-ness? also, who the fuck thought casting Russell Crowe as Javert was a good idea, and was it the same dumbass who thought Hugh Jackman’s range fit the role of Valjean? (he did a good job overall, but there was a lot of awkward straining on the high notes) and what was up with all the EXTREME CLOSEUPS? pretty sure I know how many freckles Marius has now, and I didn’t really need that knowledge.

    • Agreed completely about Hugh. They even changed the key on a few Valjean parts (specifically “Who Am I” was a 3rd lower…) and it was still out of his range. His “Bring Him Home” was too loud and strainy the entire time.

    • I always wanna talk about the les mis movie. And while I agree there were a lot of maybe unnecessary extreme close ups, Anne Hathaway’s close up in I Dreamed a Dream was amazing. It was so much more gut wrenching to be seeing nothing but her expressions and the tears in her eyes while she sang.

  7. The first French baby of 2013 led to this amusing twitter exchange:

    http://inagist.com/all/286373766462836736/?utm_source=inagist&utm_medium=rss

    A Catholic priest replied to an article tweeting that the first baby has 2 mommies, “Dear journalists, please remember your life sciences classes, this child can’t have two mommies, he has 1 mommy who has 1 partner.”

    Two which a spokesman for the ecologists party quickly replied, “When you believe a story where a virgin gives birth to the son of god, you don’t give lessons in life sciences.”

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