Hello and welcome to this thing we’re doing where we help you figure out what you’re gonna put in your mouth this week. Some of these are recipes we’ve tried, some of these are recipes we’re looking forward to trying, all of them are fucking delicious. Tell us what you want to put in your piehole or suggest your own recipes, and we’ll talk about which things we made, which things we loved, and which things have changed us irreversibly as people. Last week, we ate weeds.
My junior and senior years of college were the best years of my young life, mostly because I ate pizza twice a day every single day throughout them. Like clockwork, I snagged two slices for lunch and dinner while I was working in my office or headed home to get fucked up. I regret a few things in my young life, but I’ve never regretted spending over 700 days eating pizza, AKA my lifeblood.
In order to help y’all follow in my pizza-filled footsteps, I’ve found you 45 pizza recipes because 45 times 8 is 360 and some of these have even more than eight slices, SO THERE. A slice a day will keep all the sadness and awful things away. Or at least, it’ll make them better.
Now, let’s get cheesy.
1. Flammkuchen
2. Smoked Salmon Pizza
3. Loaded Mashed Potato Pizza
4. Mexican Black Bean Pizza
Mexican Black Bean Pizza | recipe at TidyMom.net
5. Brown Butter Lobster and Spinach Pizza with Bacon and Fontina
6. Shaved Asparagus Pizza
7. Breakfast Pizza
8. Thin Crust Pizza
9. Naked Pizza with Basil & Garlic
10. Prosciutto and Arugula Pizza
11. Thai Chicken Pizza
12. BBQ Chicken Flat Bread Pizza
13. Chicken Tikka Masala Pizza
14. Caramelized Onion, Goat Cheese, and Prosciutto Pizza
15. Garlic-Ranch Chicken Pizza
16. Classic Margherita Pizza
17. 10 Minute Mac and Cheese Pizza
18. Four Cheese White Pizza
19. NY Style Pizza
20. Sausage & Egg Breakfast Pizza
21. Cheeseburger Pizza
22. Roasted Vegetable Whole Wheat Pizza
23. Pineapple Pulled Pork Pizza with Bacon, Jalapenos, & Cilantro
24. Greek Pizza
25. Kale Goat Cheese Pizza
26. Easy French Bread Pizza
27. Hawaiian Pizza
28. Mushroom Pizza with Havarti Cheese, Fresh Herbs, and White Truffle Oil
29. Healthy Veggie Pizza
30. Jalapeño Popper Pizza
31. Spinach Artichoke Pesto Pizza
32. Cast Iron Pizza
33. Avocado Pizza
34. Laura’s Grilled Pizza
35. Beet and Goat Cheese Pizza
36. Vegan Basil Pesto Pizza
37. Pretzel Crust Pizza
38. Grilled White Pizza
39. Minimalist Baker’s Favorite Vegan Pizza
40. Philly Cheese Steak Pizza
41. Caprese Pizza
42. Grilled Chicken Fajita Pizza
43. Green and White Pizza
44. Olive, Goat Cheese, and Roasted Red Pepper Gourmet Pizza
45. Pumpkin-Chorizo Pizza
This has made me extremely hungry at work. I can’t wait to make lots of these. I’ve got really lazy with cooking in the past few months (a lot of it related to my anxiety/depression) and this has inspired me. :)
Plus a delicious-looking vegan pizza I can make my girlfriend? I hope I get some brownie points for that one! Thank Carmen!
vegan brownie points, one hopes?
Of course! ;)
i can relate to this :( i’ve also been going through a rough couple of months. i usually love cooking and eating and being social through food, so not enjoying those anymore or finding the energy to do them makes me feel so alienated from who i generally take myself to be…
but i’m trying to get back on track! maybe with pizza!!!
Yes, it’s really frustrating! Let’s try to get on track together Laura – we can do it!
you deserve ALL the vegan brownie points! let me know how it goes and if it’s as delicious as it looks!
Carmen this list is so overwhelming but in a good way. Like damn, where do I start first?
the only way out of this list is (eating) through (it)
GODSPEED.
You had me at ‘pizza’
The spinach artichoke pesto pizza has me salivating in my cubicle. It looks delicious!
We should do a pizza making workshop at Camp omg.
i would die but also i would want to live like never before, y’know?
Ancient grain pizza tho.
Vegans, tell me about your pizza happenings!
My best bro and I are making pizza this week from scratch (even the dough!), like we’ve done for years, but it’s our first attempt at making a vegan pizza.
We could make a rich pesto sauce instead of cheese, or venture into the world of vegan cheese they have at Trader Joe’s though both of us are giving big side-eye to vegan cheese rn lol.
What do you think?
Thanks Carmen for these wonderous pizzas!
Friend who makes his own pesto likes walnuts instead of pine nuts, for depth of flavor.
My parents use almonds in the pesto, along with fresh mint, and a hit of cayenne.
If your Trader Joes has vegan cheese go for, it’s not bad for what it is. Do note though they have soy cheese slices, it’
s not vegan as it uses milk casein(and possibly whey too). However, if you want more of a variety in your vegan cheese go to Whole Foods, like a spicy & Swiss. Another option on the pizza could be tempeh pepperoni, or the vegan packaged kind.
Thank you both so much! Writing these on my grocery list for tomorrow’s pizza adventure.
pesto + cayenne sounds so dreamy, woww
i’m not a vegan but i’m always here to cast an enthusiastic vote for ALL PESTO EVERYTHING.
also, lemme know how the bro-pizza-venture goes!
it is really hard to find good vegan cheese (they do exist, but they are difficult to get and always hella expensive… i highly recommend heidi ho cheese if you ever see it!) and so pesto is a really great option. and you can make it out of virtually any combination of nuts, greens, herbs, and oil you want so it is really versatile. the other great option is a cashew/tofu cream sauce. there are lots of recipes online and most are just some combination of tofu, cashews, lemon juice, nutritional yeast, salt…sometimes miso or garlic for extra flavor. sorry i dont really have exact measurements to share bc i just throw those basic ingredients in a food processor and make it to taste but you really cant go wrong. when you bake it, it really gives the veggies something to stick to which is key. you could use it on its own, but i also really like combining it with tomato sauce to make like a pink sauce.
the other day, i made a pizza with tofu cream sauce, fresh strawberries, garlic scapes, green onion, preserved lemons, and drizzled a balsamic reduction on top and it was sooo amazing. vegan pizza can be the best pizza because it forces you to get creative with combinations and flavors!
good luck :)
A food blogger I peripherally follow was like “Kitchenaid’s new freezer has a pizza shelf, clearly our priorities are not in line with most Americans.”
And I was like CLEARLY KITCHENAID WILL HAVE MY BUSINESS (IN THE FAR FAR ADULT FUTURE).
Great list, Carmen! I want to make everything on it.
That’s such a good idea. Pizzas are awkward, may as well plan for them.
Who are these people whose priorities are not in line with a pizza shelf for the freezer?!
Mutant alien lizards?
i’m so upset rn that my freezer does NOT have a pizza shelf
I loooove making pizzas, but I’m pretty basic in my toppings (cheese, fresh tomatoes, maybe a bit of meat) so I’m looking forward to trying my hand at some of these… :9
Thanks for the awesome list, Carmen!
I love pizza so damn much. This article will be excellent evidence for me in an argument with my partner. She says that pizza has certain requirements, I say that it’s really more of a format that can be used to serve most anything.
very glad to have been of service in keeping the pizza peace!
I make the same pizza all the time. I can totally try some of these recipes. Lol, as an aside, now I know why my 3 year old says “totally” all the time.
MAC N CHEESE PIZZA?? It’s happening.
Perfect gif response is perfect
Totally my first thought! At least half of these recipes would also lead to furious making out, tho.
ALL OF THE PIZZA!!! ALL OF THE TIME!!!
THIS IS THE WAY THAT WE LIVE
You’ve got me sitting here drooling over pictures of pizza at work. Looking at my baked chicken lunch like “why aren’t you more??”
This is hella delightful to my very soul.
Things I have:
– an excellent no-knead pizza dough recipe from a friend
– ideas for many tasty toppings and the means to buy them
– an oven
Things I don’t have:
– a level of self-control to prevent piling approx 8000 tonnes of toppings on each pizza, such that the poor base becomes merely a doughy tissue valiantly failing to support the ambition of my appetite
I love this list so much
Since moving close to my parents, my mother and I make pizza together every Sunday. It’s hard to break the tradition of Sunday dinners when you have an Italian mom. We make everything from scratch including the dough. We always create one “out there” pizza then a traditional Margherita. Buffalo chicken is my personal specialty as well as a Reuben pizza with corned beef, sauerkraut, Swiss, and thousand island dressing on a rye crust.
We’ve talked about doing a comedy cookbook with pizza recipes and autobiographical short stories with each recipe. Maybe I should get on that!
I’ll be real for a second. I’ve always been too lazy to make anything that’s in these lists, I always just scroll and dream of what could be and then probably make premade pizza rolls later.
That spinach artichoke pesto pizza is really tempting and looks pretty simple to make so I’m bookmarking it and making it with my mom or girlfriend (or both). MAYBE PICTURES LATER? Unless it turns out to be a disaster.
re: you taking the dive and cooking a recipe from this food list:
CAN’T WAIT FOR THE PICS
PIZZA!!! <3 I've often made french bread pizza when I'm too lazy to make dough, its fast and easy. I totally want pizza right now!
mmm i love french bread pizza!
I am a lazy pizza dough person. I buy the dough or get someone else to be pizza making mule. (why buy the cow when you can get the milk for free? etc) so I felt very deeply Laura’s Grilled Pizza comment about Safe Spaces for those of us inclined towards instant creative decorating gratification and are only here for the topping. The topping is when it gets fun. These are excellent pizza classics and I would be proud to showcase planet earth’s pizza genius to extraterrestrials if they ever wanted a great pizza.
As for pizza dough, I will retain my pizza dough making mule.
the topping is totally my favorite part! GO MAKE A PIZZA YOU BELIEVE IN ON YOUR TERMS, ANNALOU.
I need to up my game and start making my own dough. These look so freakin’ good.
What do we want?? PIZZA!
When do we want it? EVERY DAY!!!
can i get that tattooed on my face
Autostraddle, Carmen, you know the way to my heart.
<3
I tried to “like” one of the photos, and then I realized this is not Facebook or Instagram. WHOOPS.
I really love pizza. It’s my favorite thing. As a New Yorker, there’s nothing like a brick oven baked thin crust margharita pizza.
Can Crystal please write an entry in her immortality column about how to incorporate mass amounts of pizza into one’s diet? K thx.
I LOVE PIZZA AS MUCH AS I LOVE YOU WEIRDOS!!!
“Can Crystal please write an entry in her immortality column about how to incorporate mass amounts of pizza into one’s diet? K thx.”
Get Baked: The Immortal’s Pizza
Mmmmmm I love pizza, the cheesier the better, but I am rather inept at cooking. I might have to learn how to make pizza because looking at this list made me hungry despite the fact that I ate dinner not long ago.
You could always try the pre-made dough from the supermarket. That’s more assembly than cooking.
Dear heavenly pizza,
Thank you for this post.
Bless it to our use.
Bless the hands that have prepaired it.
In Carmen’s name we pray.
Amen, shalom, blessed be, etc
In the name of the crust, the cheese, and the holy marinara, amen.
Love this compilation! Has anyone else been following the pizza theme on The Kitchn’s website as well? Great tips and tricks for making great dough, whether or not you really need a pizza stone, etc.
Pizza 4EVER
Arugula on top of pizza for every meal, please.
Bookmarked some of these! Is there anything better than pizza?
Hint: No
I never make pizza and as I was scrolling down the list I was trying to figure out why, and I think it’s because there are so many damn ingredients. Like, if something’s has more than three or four ingredients, I am that much less likely to make it for dinner.
I love to bake, and things I bake have upwards of a million ingredients. And so I thought about that too, and my theory is that if I’m making dinner I’m already hungry. So I would like for it to be ready NOW PLZ. If I’m baking, though, I’m baking to have delicious food in my mouth, not in my stomach, and my mouth has a little more patience for the cooking process.
Also if I’m baking I’m probably drinking. Related? Maybe.
what if you made the pizza after eating a light lunch and then by the time it hath cooked and cooled, IT’S DINNER TIME.
I’m gonna try this and let you know. Probably it will change my life forever.
haaaa yes, keep me updated @womanbankis! #pizzaupdates
So what you’re telling me is that, except for 7 week out of the year, I could have pizza for dinner on Fridays and make a different one every single time?!? I mean, the vapid fluff, the personal stories, and political coverage are all great, but THIS is really why I come to autostraddle dot com every day.
ugh why did i not do 52 pizzas. WHY.
but also <3
OKAY LET ME TELL YOU ABOUT A THING.
I’m vegetarian, and allergic to tomatoes and pineapple. So pizza is pretty much out of my life unless it’s home made. I LOVE HOW MANY OF THESE RECIPES ARE WITHIN MY DIETARY NEEDS. Y’all are the best.
i feel so happy imagining you finally getting the pizza you deserve in this life
This is a beautiful beautiful compilation of pizza. Bless.
Stop with this deliciousness. How am I supposed to eat anything again without lamenting that it is not these pizzas??
this could be a good opportunity to practice your visualization exercises tbh
I honestly could have done with just the mashed potato pizza and the mac and cheese pizza. wouldn’t have been disappointed. appreciate all the other pizzas on this list though!
avo. on. pizza.
HOW did this not occur to me before.
Oh sweet sweet pizza. Ugh, I miss cheese so much sometimes. Real cheese. Not vegan cheese.
*HEART EYES*
Now THIS is the kind of quality content I’m looking for
Ohhh that mushroom one is going directly into my face as soon as I can buy the ingredients.
I can’t form words anymore, just sounds.
is it the sound of you cooking and consuming these pizzas because if so RT
RT not eating anything else for some time.
Can I gay marry this post? I was just in Italy, and obv ate all the pizza, but instead of being sick of it I just want MOAR
“Can I gay marry this post?”
it is so ordered.
I went to Italy last year and I was like “This is it. This is where I shall get tired of pizza.”
Just made me want more. So I relate.
THIS IS MY FUCKING POST RIGHT HERE. I am forever a pizza-enthusiast.
I’ve only recently realized how amazing fresh greens taste on a pizza, so I am happy seeing so much of it here! Thank you for taking the time to make our lives complete.
I’m so excited to try some of these. My mouth started watering at the Asparagus Pizza, but omg I MUST EAT that olive/goat cheese/roasted red pepper one ASAP. (Full disclosure: I’m vegetarian. Also, thanks for always including lots of vegetarian recipes in these articles!)
Any advice on a decent gluten free crust? I’ve tried and liked cauliflower pizza but I really long or a chewy savoury crust I’ve yet to find since being diagnosed as coeliac
I don’t normally crave pizza, but this post just got me so excited about pizza! Who knew?
It’s official, this post inspired me to make my VERY FIRST PIZZA DOUGH! It was…surprisingly simple I gotta say. I’m following the NY style pizza dough recipe which calls for a “cold rise” in the fridge for a couple days (to get all those flavors happenin’) so I will update when it makes it out of the fridge and into the oven!
Jalepeno Popper recipe and more @ http://www.thewoodfiredenthusiast.com