Real L Word Episode 208 Recap: The Hardest Time to Write This Rhyme

Back to Parents Week where Sajdah the Eager Homogay, dressed for a cold afternoon at St. Mary’s School for Wayward Boys, carts Mom to a Special Gay-Friendly Church to shock her socks off.

waiting for god(ot)

This church sitch is mega-important ’cause:

Sajdah: “I grew up in a Christian Church and I’m talking Bible Study on Wednesday, choir rehearsal Saturday morning, church Sunday morning and church Sunday night. We were churched to death.”

just like jesus!

So basically Mom interviews about her relationship with Sajdah and Jesus Christ has this woman been THROUGH IT:

Mom: “I was 16 when I had Saj. And I didn’t even realize that I was pregnant until I was probably like 7, 8 months because I was just that ignorant. I didn’t know anything about the female body or anything. So that’s why I think her life is the way that it is, because she was in pure innocence…”

in other words, she wasn’t kidding about not knowing how to have sex

Sarita: “I really wanted to make sure that she wasn’t as naive as I was growing up, so I asked Saj to do one thing for me, go to school, get a good education, and she’s done just that. So now, if she chooses to love on a woman, marry a woman, bring me some in vitro babies, I am fine. I am.”

You’ve got a choice here to get hung up on “chooses to” or wonder what she meant by how Sajdah‘s life “is the way that it is,” or you can do what I did, which is almost cry. Sometimes I feel like things are just changing so fast, you guys. Every year the chances of coming out without totally destroying your entire life/family seem slightly higher.

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Back to WhitneyWorld!

Rachel, in her glam-baby hangover giant sunglasses, Flashdance sweater and all-around “hot mess” demeanor, is sucking straws with Whit at another outdoor eatery, and Whitney just seems so much older than Rachel in this scene. I’m not gonna lie, this scene made me cry out of both eyes, because it’s surprisingly emotional, when you’re on the other side of clinical depression, to see someone like Rachel, still knee-deep in the hardest parts of it.

no my sunglasses are bigger, mine are

So! Whitney had a rough-and-tumble adolescence involving black lipstick and giant sweatshirts and, apparently, drugs. It’s hard to say which came first, but I’m guessing it was drugs and THEN black lipstick.

Whitney: “I come from addiction and I know what things look like and what behaviors look like. When I was young, I had a problem, for sure, and then when I was … starting to get clean with it, my best friend passed away from drugs and I don’t wanna see that happen to anybody that I care about again.”

whitney mixter, urban camouflage edition

Whitney’s scared that Rachel’s gonna take the wrong Kolonopin Kocktail one day and honey aren’t we all.

and then i’m doubly surprised to see i live in your tool shed in LA for some reason

Rachel: “I mean, I don’t care. Sometimes I’m honestly surprised that I wake up like — I’ve been surprised before where I’m like Oh. Here I am.
Whitney: “That scares me.”

 What if Rachel thinks she’s in a documentary about addiction but later will face an intervention?

Rachel: “I’m totally drowning right now, and honestly, I really just don’t care. I don’t want to live anymore like this.”

Rachel breaks down crying. Whitney suggests therapy. Rachel’s sad and she needs therapy and can’t afford it. This is like Our Generation’s Problem — we’re all crying, we all need therapy, and we can’t afford it.

THIS

Rachel: “I need you to help me.”
Whitney: “I swear to G-d I will help you.”

Whitney will help foot the bill for therapy and it will probably be Dan Foxworthy.

and sometimes inside you

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Romi, all business and sense, says it was Kelsey’s inability to recognize the significance of the wine, not the wine itself, that led to their dissolved relationship. Like Elijah.

and how do you know when it’s time to let go

So now Romi‘s panicking like Kelsey’s starting kindergarten tomorrow and starts hovering and giving Kelsey gems of wisdom like, “you should save up money and get your own apartment” which is, I’m sure, a news flash –

Kelsey: “You won’t have to worry about me anymore, Romi.”
Romi: “Kels, I’m always gonna worry about you, and I’m always here.”
Kelsey: “I feel sick.”

ohhhhh is that how people get apartments

Romi needs Kelsey to give her an ETA on Kelsey’s next stuff-retrieving mission ’cause Romi can’t just have “someone come in through her house” at all hours.

Kelsey: “I’m gonna come by tomorrow.”
Romi: “Why? Not tomorrow! Like, let’s have a minute — I need — I need, Kels, I need–“
Kelsey: “I NEED I NEED I NEED I NEED!”
Romi: “A break — I need a break –”
Kelsey: “I NEED I NEED I NEED!”
Romi: “And then we’ll be fine if you don’t give me that little minute of space it’s gonna be hard for me to like –”
Kelsey: “Girl, I’m gonna give you plenty of space.”

She’s gonna give you so much space you’re gonna need to bring astronaut ice cream.

Final words from the Man in the Yellow/Grey Hat:

look me in the heart and unbreak broken it won’t happen

Romi escorts Kelsey to the blurred-out face she’ll be crashing with and because they’re lesbians, Kelsey shares her intended processing grieving plan with her ex-girlfriend (won’t “sit around and mope” over it).

After dropping Kelsey off and at the last minute volunteering to bring food next week if Kelsey’s hungry, Romi starts driving around town like a crazy old man in his like campfire jacket and warmest winter hat, ranting about how people are adults who can take care of themselves. “In my day you couldn’t just order a babysitter on the internet, you had to go to a Tupperware Party and find her YOURSELF. We didn’t have NannyCam. We had TRUST! AND GRAPE JUICE!”

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Back at Sarita’s Hotel, Sajdah’s all hopped up on Fun-Dip and Tootsie-Pops and wants her Mom to stay forever-ever.

i had a bad dream

“This is just another chapter, toffee,” Sajdah‘s Mom says. “You’re doing well, you’re doing real good, you’re a good person, God will continue to bless you.”

Sajdah‘s gotta put God first in everything that she does, including vadgeblasting.

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Francine is at her job which is NamiWave Media. NamiWave Media is a company that provides home entertainment contraptions similar to Redbox. You can rent movies from NamiWave media for only a dollar a day. NamiWave Media: It’s a Thing!

NamiWave Media NamiWave NamiWave NamiWave

NamiWave, which sounds like the name of a hair product Claire would use to de-frizz her banglets, does bizness in Japan and so the Japanese girl (Francine) is learning Japanese I think she’s learning Japanese I really think so. Learning Japanese I think she’s learning Japanese I really think so. Learning Japanese I think she’s learning Japanese I really think so.

how do you say “i wish you could love me for who i am, mom”

I love how Francine’s got her sunglasses perched up on her head like that. You never know when sun’s gonna hit.

for example your friend claire, maybe don’t take her to japan

Francine: “Growing up being Japanese it’s very different, no one’s very open about being gay… in Japan you don’t wanna be the one that’s different because you’re dating girls — so you just wanna fly under the radar and not say anything. But you know what, this is who I am, and if it’s about the people who love me, they’re gonna love me no matter what.”

I mean — look at this face. How can you be mad at this face.

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So, back at Whitney’s Box Office, a little backyard party is coming together…

Whitney: “We’re not gonna lie, we’ve been working on a little project.”

THANK GOD! I hate it when people lie about projects!

easy as pie

So, Whitney’s invited Cori & Kacy, clearly, and also Romi, because: 

a bath and some xanax?

Right! Also, Romi’s got a weave or something all of a sudden, or maybe it’s part of her hat.

who wants to play capture the flag

Wow I am really tired of writing this recap

alyssa will be followed by the cock-ring bearer

Sidenote: It’s so crazy that sperm is in such short/expensive supply in this episode/life because if you’ve ever lived a gnarly heterosexual lifestyle at any point in the past/present, I think you could confirm that sperm is in no short supply at all. In fact men are essentially and often literally lining up or willing to pay YOU in exchange for permission to lie on top of you and dispose of their excess sperm. There should be some way for straight girls to just pass that excess muck off to their lesbian friends. 

This is Almost as cute as Mr.bendy

Cori, never afraid of the dirty words, laments over prior recommendations to impregnate herself via anal douche, and commends this recent technological development.

Kacy: “There was never a more thoughtful dildo given then that little inseminator.”
Cori: “It was not little.”

No really though, it’s super sweet, the cherry on top of Cori’s empty uterus:

also a great party favor for baby’s first circumcision

The happy couple goes home all happy and shit and nightfall crawls through the last remaining minutes of this excruciating reality television experience.

this

Alyssa asks Whitney who she’s “rampage texting” and Whitney, the smooth operator that she is, says she’s “tweeting.” You know. “Tweeting, updating.” Updating what, exactly?

think about twitter what does it feel like to look at twitter just act like you’re looking at twitter

Whitney says she’s gonna go to bed so she can get up early, which obviously means she’s gonna fuck somebody with a dildo. The dogs know what’s up, like Pretty Little Liars.

is it tor i really hope it’s tor please be tor

Is it …

Jenny Schecter?

Or is it…

Evan Rachel Wood Bisexual?

Or…

Emily Fields?

For that matter could it be…

Ghost Allison?

No, it must be…

Santana!

If not Santana then perhaps it could be…

Megan Rapinoe?

Or wait what about —

The Kool-AID guy?

No wait maybe it’s…

top-on-top

Frankie from Lip Service?

Wait actually I think I know who it is, it’s…

Justin Bieber, who got lost on his way home from T-Ball! NO NO NO I know who it is, it’s…

Whitney herself!

Or, perhaps it’s…

HAHAHAH JK!!!

IT’S ROMI!!!

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Riese is the 33-year-old CEO, CFO and Editor-in-Chief of Autostraddle.com as well as an award-winning writer, blogger, fictionist, copywriter, video-maker and aspiring cyber-performance artist who grew up in Michigan, lost her mind in New York City, and now lives in The Bay Area. Her work has appeared in nine books including "The Bigger the Better The Tighter The Sweater: 21 Funny Women on Beauty, Body Image & Other Hazards Of Being Female," magazines including Marie Claire and Curve, and all over the web including Nerve, Bitch, Emily Books and Jezebel. She had a very popular personal blog once upon a time, and then she recapped The L Word, and then she had the idea to make this place, and now here we all are!

Riese has written 1760 articles for us.

133 Comments

  1. Thumb up 0

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    I saw the episode a couple of days ago online. I thought it was pretty sad. I don’t wish anything bad against anybody. I just felt that this whole season was a big downer. Then again, it had its moments. I noticed that Whitney doesn’t blog about the show anymore. I am with you, Reise. I will be glad when it is all over too. I am burned out from this show. I wish all the cast members the best with their lives. Peace.

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    i felt so uncomfortable watching this because it was so fucking personal. also, there was a cricket that was loose in the house and it kept chirping during whitney and rachel’s scene which made the awkward pauses even more awkward.

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    Riese thanks for keeping up with this for our entertainment. I have to admit I’ve been waiting for your recap as this episode left me with a weird sensation.

    Kudos to Kacy for handling her wife so calmly. Romi this ep: wtf?. Whitney sometimes makes me believe she really is a good person and then something happens.

    I loved all the surprising guests you proposed… brilliant!

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      I’m also glad that it’s over. Though I’d wager that also Romi has a lot of growing up to do.
      All her complaining bout how she has to take care of Kelsey and basically putting the blame for that on Kels… Romi put herself into that position of mommy-ing her girlfriend… her wanting Kelsey to text her that same night, so she could know she’s alright is a good example for that…
      As much as Romi doesn’t want to take care of her girlfriend I believe she herself wants to be taken care of. Wonder how that hookup with Whitney will play out.

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    I once knew a guy named the warhammer
    And he told me he had friends in the slammer
    The one good thing about him was his meat
    Which he supplied to all of us which was no easy feat
    I’m not talking about the thing that Whitney used as a model
    Mine is more along the lines of that thing that used to stand in a field and dawdle
    It would be easier to say that I’m talking about a cow
    But forget that because these girls need to take a bow
    I’ve never seen this much drama in my life
    Hopefully Chaiken won’t make me live through it thrice!

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    Sajdah’s mom is pretty awesome. I wish everyone’s mom could have that same positive acceptance.

    The Surprise Guests were the best thing about this recap, aside from: “That’s why Romi is the femmiest fem in all the femland. She could wear pants WITH pumps and nobody would dare second-guess her. Romi could swing a hammer while fucking a girl wearing a double-headed dildo and yelling “Call me Daddy!” and still — still even then, in that outlandish and pornographic and slightly unpleasant situation — her eyes would still give her away.”

    I feel like this episode had waaayy too much going on. Just so many feelings, urrrgghhh!

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    There’s probably somewhere else that has this information but…. where’s the best/easiest place to find these episodes online? After catching all the recaps this season, I feel that I may need to actually see an episode.

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    “Hi, I’m Ilene Chaiken” – Lmao!

    I’m sorry but this episode gave me another reason to cringe every time Romi was onscreen. How dare her slow but sincere girlfriend have a glass of wine, while she bangs Whitney whose dreads probably reek of alcohol from a mile away? The writers on this show suckkkkkkkkk!

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    “Whitney trusts everyone else is keeping better tabs on her behavior than she is, because they are.”

    The truth, you speak it Riese.

    Romi is a class act. And Kelsey might as well have had the whole bottle for the price of one glass it seems. Fuck girl, grab some brie, a baguette, lock yourself in the cellar and make it a weekend.

    Other than that, I like Kacy. Kacy can stay.

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    the inseminator is back!
    and yeah, now i can totally see how they needed to make a mold of whitney’s friends wang instead of just drilling the appropriate holes for the catheter into an ordinary off the shelve dildo. NOT.
    at least it comes in a nice shade of hulk green.

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      It was explained in the recap of the episode when the inseminator was introduced that they couldn’t use a regular dildo because of copyright issues. I think if it works, the idea is to actually sell this as their own product which is why they can’t use already existing dildos.

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        Totally agree with you, Jessie.
        Can’t deny I’m somewhat pissed off with the inseminator’s creators.
        Getting that bogus explanation of copyright infringement and hygenic issues for having to endure that craptacular fest-o-wang felt like an insult to my common sense and sucked. But I was willing to give them the benefit of the doubt, that they indeed did some research which we didn’t get to see ‘n’ all that jazz.
        And now all that deep deep research amounts to a catheter?!

        I think Alyssa and Whitney very well know how reality tv works and play the game – making up an interesting storyline (latching on to kacy&cori’s), providing enticing visuals (penis galore) and milk it (selling the inseminator).

        Hence I consider it legitimate to criticize them for the storyline they provided just as much as ifc.
        In this case it read: dykes just can’t do without a penis. Also women have penis envy.
        It’s old, it’s lame and I’m effing sick of it.
        I just wanna hurl book copies of Judith Butler at’em. At high velocity.
        It’s not about the penis, you nincompoops, it’s about the phallus! (And in comparison to that penis looses.)

        Going with a living penis model instead of molding their own dildo from scratch was entirely their decision. It makes for ‘interesting’ footage, maybe they prefer very penis-like looking dildos themselves (I don’t wanna know!) or assume dildo-using dykes do. Whichever way in doing so they pushed that age-old trite theme of the dance around the male’s dong.

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          I don’t really understand your anger with Whitney and Alyssa. Sure, the producers milked the whole inseminator thing and totally turned it into something to keep the large male fan base entertained but I think Whitney and Alyssa created it with good intentions. Sure, it may just be a dick mold and a catheter but there’s nothing else on the market like that, so it needed to be created. I mean, isn’t that what Whitney said from the beginning? It’s so simple it seems ridiculous that it didn’t already exist. Some of the greatest inventions are the simplest, just look at the snuggie! Just because the solution to the problem was simple doesn’t mean this was an unnecessary invention or that they didn’t do their research.

          And while you may feel that the inclusion of the dildo at all was unnecessary we saw that Kacy wanted to be involved in the process in this way, they went looking for a product exactly like this and couldn’t find one. I don’t think it’s appropriate for anyone to judge her decision or what would make her feel more comfortable. I know personally that if I was trying to have a baby my girlfriend would definitely want the inseminator and it would be extremely important to her. It’s not about penis envy, it’s about wanting to be involved in the process in a more “natural way.” With a product like this a woman or a trans* man could actually impregnate their partner themselves in the middle of a sexual act as opposed to in an office or with a turkey baster or, god forbid, an anal douche. While some people may say that the desire to do that is just some ingrained heteronormative idea of how a baby should be made I think it’s up to the individuals to make that decision themselves.

          The summarize this extremely long comment: Some people are going to be really glad for the inseminator and I think Whitney and Alyssa knew that when they created it. With the producers did with their good intentions is the fault of the show, not them.

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          Maybe there are some misunderstandings.

          I think it’s Alyssa and Whitney who milk(ed) the inseminator thing. (And in general (try to) use being part of this tv show as a platform for other business endeavors. The show’s a vehicle to make money.)

          I don’t think the inclusion of the dildo is unnecessary, but of the penis/Caes/the dipping of the no-no parts. To make an ejaculating or in this case inseminating dildo a penis(!) is simply not necessary. At all.
          My critique gears at W&A chosing to go the route of dipping no-no parts. Which does it’s part in reinforcing age old narratives of penis envy, heteronormativity yadda yadda fishcakes. Or as Riese wittingly put it in her recap “Whitney’s hatched a plan to help Cori & Kacy get preggers “the natural way.” Obviously this involves a penis, which is the Superior Method of Conception.”
          That’s one thing that has me throwing hissy fits.

          The other thing’s Alyssa wrote “I could have molded something out of clay first to cast, but PLEASE PEOPLE… REMEMBER WE ARE TRYING TO MAKE ENTERTAINING, FUNNY, INSANE moments that people will remember.” (her caps, not mine) and thus admitted that they are very well aware of the tv format/genre they (Whitney and Alyssa) are in and casting themselves as stakeholders/knowingly, deliberately acting (as in ‘to take action’) protagonists.
          As thus I think it is admissible they may bear the brunt of the criticism of this fab ‘lez representation’ they’re cooking up. In this case it’s defo not just IFC or ‘the producers’.

          In no way do I judge how Cori and Kacy go about conceiving their child(ren). Whether they (wish to) use an inseminating dildo (or which shape it has) I did not discuss.
          (Btw, when my partner and I will try to have a kid, there is a very high probability that one of her favorite dildos will get drilled for the catheter plumbing. With that variety of dildos on the market for that huge variety of preferences of all the different lesbian vaginas out there…)

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    I was so surprised when Sajdah’s Mom showed up bald because on that one episode she was all like:

    “I ain’t on the bottom of nothing, You ain’t pulling my hair out. No, I ain’t on the bottom of nothing.”

    I was legit confused, I think I have OCD.

    Anyway, loved this recap, especially the ‘who is it’ part at the end. It was suspenseful even though I knew who it actually was.

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    oh riese, every trlw recap you write just convinces me further that you are actually a great queer warrior sent to earth to protect us all from ilene and the pain of having to watch this show in real life.

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    ugh really? Romi just seems so cold.
    Kelsey can come drink wine with me anytime.
    Sorry I even on the recaps I just kind of skip over all the baby parts. I really wish they fleshed those girls out at least a little bit more. I know there has to be more to them then sperm.

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      Kelsey acts like a stoned 14 year old boy. Her girlfriend is going through a detox and Romi did say that they should break up. It was Kelsey who said that she wanted to give up drinking for their relationship. Romi is obvs not perfect, but why is everyone Team Kelsey. That girl needs to get her shit together.

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        wellllllll i don’t think berating your girlfriend on a day to day basis about her lack of moneys (p.s. unemployment in california is 11.8%) and adultness and not treating you to things you know she can’t afford is pretty damn lame. also didn’t she like do the cooking, cleaning, and beer runs, shit i’d love a girlfriend that would do all of that without being asked. anyway if there is one good thing ifc is doing is giving these people another stream of cash flow.

        on the other hand i do think kelsey needs to get her shit together, maybe go back to school or just try no fly solo for a bit and pick herself up from this messy break up. but at the end of the day…i have no real fucks to give, they can do whatever it’s not really affecting me (as long as mr isn’t involved, obsession begins now)

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        I speak only from recaps as I haven’t watch the show,or previews or really anything(which means really I have no idea what is going on). I just see pictures and well Kelsey is cute and I have a thing for stoned like personalities so maybe that’s my attraction. Really it’s just that Romi always seems so mean to her, berating her either to her face or to anyone that will listen. And yeah Kelsey is young but she does seem like she’s trying, having a glass of wine with family is not the same as getting drunk.

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        1. Like many said, Romi was constantly putting Kelsey down. Yes, Kelsey needs to get her shit together, but as a girlfriend it’s more important to help and support (notnecessarily financially) her, or try to get help for her, rather than constantly berate and complain about her, especially in front of family and friends (AND ON CAMERA!).
        2. Romi obviously wanted to break up with Kelsey a loooonng time ago (that was probably why they were not having sex), and this whole drink thing is an excuse for it
        3. Kelsey DID stop drinking with her. She had ONE glass of wine while she was away, when Romi wasn’t even around. Obviously she did not do it out of spite, nor did because she was addicted to it, it was just the situation. And she was honest about it (she very well could have lied).
        4. Apart from helping support Kelsey financially, Romi is pretty self-centered, everything has to be done her way (because she’s older?), everything is dictated on her terms. Whatever Kelsey says gets dismissed as because she’s young or she doesn’t see it yet, etc. Kelsey was completely right when she said that Romi cares more about herself than everyone else, she is pretty selfish and Kelsey was giving A LOT of herself for Romi.
        5. Remember the first few episodes, Romi just wouldn’t put out? then BAM! right after the break up SEX WITH WHITNEY. (Who also drinks, btw.) Add to that how she gossiped about Kelsey with Whitney at Francine’s party? That whole ending was messed up.

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      also, didn’t everyone see this whole romi whitney thing coming??? I mean those nights out with whit talking about how kelsey is too young and not on the same page and can’t take care of romi like a princess…..and then they cut to whitney (in that same episode) where she talks about liking to take care of girls and buying them things like princesse…. i mean no surprise here

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        yeah it has seemed pretty obvious Romi was pushing Kels away and trying to get back in with Whitney (and Whitney just seems to want it because well shes Whitney does she say no? hit it once then leave it till it finds something new), which seems like a really bad decision on her part but whatevas

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    I loved how Kelsey handled that breakup. She finally redeemed herself for me in this episode. I realiZe the show is edited, but damn romi came off as crazy, selfish and manipulative (to me). She constantly made condensing comments to her or spoke disparagingly about her to others. It didn’t seem like she respected Kelsey. If there’s a season 3 I hope kelseys on it. I also hope she doesn’t try to get back with romi- but it looks like she’s with dani Campbell now?

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    Seven Brides for Seven Brothers is one of the creepiest movies ever made. My mom thought it was romantic until I asked her how she would handle me getting kidnapped by a mountain man for the purposes of shacking up/falling in love/producing babies. “Oh… I never thought about is THAT way /sadface.” Krystle 1 Mom 0 (for once).

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    Reise, I really like what you wrote about, “Every year the chances of coming out without totally destroying your entire life/family seem slightly higher.” I feel that way sometimes. What a wonderfully exciting, emotionally taxing feeling that is.

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    okay this line is cold and hilarious at the same time: Hi, I’m Ilene Chaiken, director, producer, and executive creator of Showtime’s lowest-rated series, The Real L Word. LMAO!DAMN, THAT WAS FUNNY.

    anyway, i loved all the scenes with sajdah’s mom. for the first time, i truly saw the sweet and respectful side of sajdah because she was in her mother’s presence. and i’m happy her mom seems to be coming to terms with saj’s sexuality.
    romi was being manipulative and selfish to get kelsey to stop drinking and kelsey is a grown adult who seems like she’s high as a kite, can’t keep a job, and can’t support herself. romi was controlling and kelsey was co-dependent. they needed to seperate. i do have to say that i thought it was disrespectful for romi to be talking about kelsey behind her back to whitney.
    and whitney and romi hooking up again…huh? and why? i’m not sure why romi would want to go back down that road again, because it didn’t seem like she could handle whitney the first time.
    rachel’s situation is very upsetting and frightening. i’m mad at whitney for not paying attention to her until she was at a crisis point and suicidal. i hope rachel got the help she needed, during the show and after the show.

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      I feel like Rachel wants Whitney, bad, but she can’t admit it. (Following her to SF? Constantly waiting for hook-up opportunities? Getting fucked up on pills and mixing it with drinks to get Whitney’s attention?) Whitney can sense it, and that’s why she was keeping her distance. Well, of course, that, and the fact that Rachel won’t acknowledge that she has a pill/alcohol/addiction problem. Part of Rachel’s problem IS Whitney as well.

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    Can we talk about Romi’s hair at the end of the episode? Did I dream that weave?

    By the way, I wonder why no one has commented on Francine’s relationship with this Kristhianne(sp?) She seems to have moved at the same rate that Sajdah did with Chanel. One episode they’re just meeting, then the next she has a lower third as “Francine’s Girlfriend”

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    WAIT CORI AND KACY I HAVE A BETTER IDEA WHY DON’T YOU JUST ASK CAES YOURSELVES?!?!?!??!?!?!!!!!! he seems nice enough, big of wang and generous of character.

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    I want a flipbook made of all the people who could possibly be knocking on Whitney’s door, that was pretty fantastic. Except… the Kool-Aid man doesn’t knock. He just bursts through your wall and yells “OH YEA!”

    Everyone needs to stop wearing poodle sweaters on their heads. Stop it. Now.

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    That end recap of who was at the door was hilarious. But yeah, Stevie Wonder could have seen that Romi/Whitney hookup coming. Whitney suggestively smirks at Romi everytime she looks at her. Interesting how Kelsey had to beg Romi for sex, but Romi doesn’t hesitate to give it up to Whitney.

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    The “who is at the door” was completely, wonderful hilarious. And the “deplaning lesbians.” And the “just like jesus!” also excellent, possibly my fave, so many excellent goings-on here. and was this like a particularly jew-y recap, or am i being a crazy person?

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      maybe i was feeling really jewish this week

      my gf also laughed at “deplaning lesbians,” it’s interesting to me when jokes i write are unexpectedly more funny to people than i imagined they’d be

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    I give Kacy credit for not flipping out when Cori suggested sleeping with a man as a baby-making option. I think I would have walked out at that. What an incredible insult, not just to their relationship, but to Kacy’s butch ID.

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    This is why I love AS:
    1) because one moment you can say
    “This is like Our Generation’s Problem — we’re all crying, we all need therapy, and we can’t afford it.”
    which are some of the realest words I’ve ever felt
    2) and the next you can say
    “Learning Japanese I think she’s learning Japanese I really think so. Learning Japanese I think she’s learning Japanese I really think so.”
    which is just funny
    3) then
    “I love how Francine’s got her sunglasses perched up on her head like that. You never know when sun’s gonna hit.”
    another funny statement
    4) before
    “Wow I am really tired of writing this recap”
    so honest.
    5) and finally ending on Romi after the most magnificent montage ever.
    Maybe it’s just the vino or brandy talking but i think i’ve finally realized i love AS so much because it’s REAL. and not like Real L Word real, like actually real. honest, funny, good stuff. anyways thanks friends

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    This show: proving that even if you come out and introduce your parents to your brand-spankin-new ubergay lifestyle, the first thing your mom will mention will still be the holes in your jeans. “You bought them like that? Why would you pay for jeans that already need to be patched?”

    #lolmoms

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    I am very glad on how Kelsey handled the breakup with Romi. I will give her a high five for that. However, I do think that Romi hooking up with Whitney at the end of the episode was very tacky.

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    Can I just say that I freaking love Sarita!? The fact that she thought the “gay-friendly” church would be Homo Central and everyone would “look” gay cracked me up! Well, that and the Jack Daniels on the plane. MOAR RITA.

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    LOL at the door pictures. I didn’t even see the episode (because why the fuck would I watch this show?) but that made me laugh. It also made me feel extremely conflicted. I would open the door for almost all of those people… Santana, Emily, the Kool-Aid guy. But I think I’d go with Megan Rapinoe. Win!

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    Someone tell Romi to get over herself. Kelsey has the right to a frikking drink with her family once in a while without her dominator of a girlfriend making her feel guilty about it.

    It’s good to have support from your other half, but geez its ROMI with the drinking problem. Take a fecking chill pill. ugh I HATE THAT WOMAN, I CANT STAND HER FAKE ATTITUDE. and then she bitches to whitney about her.

    she’s meant to b your girlfriend romi, not your personal bitch.

    i am officially taking this stupid show way-too-seriously

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    Somehow I knew that Romi and Whitney were going to happen again, somehow. Honestly, I’m sure Kelsey was sick enough of Romi yelling at her that I don’t know if she’ll care.

    That’s probably going to be awkward though. How long did she even wait, a few hours?

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    I cried like a baby three times this episode..damn you Ilene! Cori/Kasey, Saj/her mom, and Whitney/Rachel. As much as I believe some things are scripted, those three moments felt very real.

    Favorite LifetimeTV moments: When Cori & Kasey are arguing and Cori walks off, Kasey’s instant reaction was ‘I have to check on my wife’. In that moment, it was about her relationship and not about filming a reality show. I love how Kasey is always very aware of how her partner feels and seem to always know how to respond in a way that gets her point across but not alienate her partner. Next favorite moment was when Saj & her mom where in bed talking and Saj just starts crying and lays in her mom’s arms. You are never to old to need your mom and get that validation that no matter what you choose to do with your life, your mom is always there to give you a hug and a kiss. I am a grown married mother of two and there are so many times I just want that affirming love from my mother. Maybe it’s because my relationship with my mom is so not what I need it to be, that’s why that moment struck a cord

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