By Kate & Carolyn
Welcome to Movie Night!, where we choose a movie based on any number of variables and feelings, create a themed menu to match, then spend the night eating these foods and watching these movies! It’s an uncomplicated and promising plan.
This week’s movie is A Perfect Ending, featuring the scandalous liaison between a rich housewife and a sexy callgirl. Follow this flick with the delicious and unexpected coupling of Lemon Pepper Spinach Linguini and Cantaloupe Sorbet to give your tastebuds as much of a shock as the movie’s surprise ending.
A Perfect Ending
A Perfect Ending, the newest feature from the director of Elena Undone, is now available to watch on Wolfe On Demand. In terms of cheesiness, it’s premium quality ooey gooey, best paired with a generous helping of lesbianism. It’s a tale of midlife sexuality that is only about half as awkward as The L Word‘s Phyllis narrative, with twice the amount of lengthy sex scenes and emotional processing.
Barbara Niven is a middle-aged housewife who’s never had an orgasm, and hires a female escort to do the trick. That female escort is Jessica Clark, aka super hot Lilith from True Blood. What follows in an imaginably complicated and erotic way is history… er, herstory. This movie has everything: exotic ambiguously-ethnic call girl, bored WASP-y housewife straight out of a Lifetime movie, a madame with a Barbie fixation, and every possible film transition known to cinema. But lesbihonest, folks: you’re not here for the narrative. It’s a cheeseball fest that you and your girl can quote for years to come. Cathy DeBuono has a cameo in it, too.
Lemon Pepper Spinach Linguini
Lemon Pepper Spinach Linguini
Most versions of this recipe (actually, all of them) omit adding arugula or baby spinach at the end, and while there is a lot to be said for not messing with perfection, there is also a lot to be said for liking vegetables and besides, the extra green looks pretty. Most versions of this recipe also call for 1/4 cup of heavy cream added when you boil the olive oil, which we’re omitting.
If you want to use nutritional yeast instead of Parmesan, make it taste cheesier by pulsing 1/2 yeast flakes with 1 cup walnuts and 1 tsp. salt in a food processor until crumbly. Make sure to add the lemon juice slowly — I found the flavor went a lot further than with cheese. You will also need to add less pasta water.
1 pound linguini
1/4 cup olive oil
1/2 cup freshly grated Parmesan (or nutritional yeast with walnuts)
Handful fresh basil leaves (about 4 stems’ worth), shredded
Arugula or baby spinach (optional)
1. Cook the linguini in salted water until al dente.
2. While you wait, zest the lemons until you have about a tablespoon of zest, then juice them — you need 1/4 cup of juice, but may want the option to add more.
3. Scoop out 1 1/4 cups of the pasta water. Drain pasta and set aside.
4. In that same pot, boil the olive oil, 1 cup of the pasta water and the zest for 3 minutes over high heat. Add the pasta and stir until coated. Add 1/4 cup lemon juice and the cheese or nutritional yeast and toss quickly until coated. Taste and add more lemon juice if you think it needs it. Add the basil and spinach or arugula and stir.
5. Serve, season to taste with salt and black pepper, and sprinkle with extra cheese or yeast flakes.
Easier to make than it is to spell.
sugar (will likely be unnecessary)
1. Cut up a cantaloupe (or melon, or really almost any fruit you want) into small cubes.
3. Remove from freezer and puree in food processor or with hand blender until smooth. Add water to make smoother. Add sugar if needed. Cut with a banana or some sort of dairy product if too sweet.
4. Serve. The leftovers will last in the freezer for a few weeks.