1. Lesbian Steel is the name of my post-punk alt band. Now accepting applications for lead guitar, vocals, bass, keyboard, and on-tour catsitter.

    • Wait, what about a drummer?! I am basically shit at drums, but I do own my own kit so what I lack in talent I make up for in fiscal responsibility.

      I am also good at driving to liquor stores and killing spiders. I feel like both of these talents should put me in the running for something.

  2. “Juliette Lewis.”

    “Wha…ew..god…get outta here!”

    I’m just glad the Jew outside the temple joke made it into the final cut.

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