“To L and Back” Generation Q Podcast Episode 201: Late to the Party

Well it sure has been a minute, hasn’t it! Many things have changed in the last year and a half but one thing remains true: The L Word and our love of gabbing about The L Word. There is at least one very fun change to the podcast this season, which is that Riese will now join Drew and me as a host for Season 2! Only time will tell if there will be more fun changes in store but we’re thrilled to be back.

After what feels like truly forever, we finally get to check back in with our Gen Q crew! On this week’s episode we get answers to burning questions like, who was Sophie running toward in the airport? Will Shane ever learn who she’s allowed to flirt with? How much do we love Carrie? And is thinking cheating? Just kidding, that last one will be discussed until the end of time, apparently!

SHOW NOTES

+ Riese’s written recap of Episode 201: Late To The Party
+ I was wrong – it’s Breakroom 86 that you enter through a vending machine!
+ The Bachelor Mansion AirBnB, which actually costs less than I originally guessed
+ Riese’s recap of the original Is Thinking Cheating conversation, The L Word 5.10 “Lifecycle”
+ Drew’s copaganda-critical essay


Drew: Hi, I’m Drew!

Analyssa: I’m Analyssa!

Riese: And I am Riese! And this is—

Riese, Drew, and Analyssa: To L and Back!

Drew: Generation Q.

Riese: Gen Q. Much like Generation Q is the spinoff of the original L Word, this podcast is a spinoff of a podcast about the original L Word, and it’s owned or supported, I don’t know what the words are, by autostraddle.com, a website.

Drew: Yeah. Well, I’m so excited to be back after all this time.

Riese: Me too.

Drew: There was a whole pandemic since we were recording Gen Q To L and Back episodes.

Riese: Right. And also you’re in Ohio, which is weird.

Drew: I am in Ohio right now working on a movie. I did not move to Ohio.

Riese: I love Ohio.

Drew: Leaving LA for a short period of time. I’ll be back.

Riese: Oh, should we explain who we are?

Drew: Oh, sure.

Riese: I’m Riese. I am the CEO and co-founder of Autostraddle and I was also the co-host of To L and Back. And I know way too much about this show.

Analyssa: I’m Analyssa. I co-hosted the first season of this with Drew and we’re thrilled to have Riese join because she knows so much about the show. And I’m gay. And I live in Los Angeles and I work in TV. I’m going to be a studio exec someday. Someday, she says. And that’s me.

Drew: I’m Drew. I’m a writer for Autostraddle and a filmmaker. I am also gay. Wow! And I’m trans. And I know a lot about movies and some about television and I love The L Word so much and I hate The L Word so much. And there’s a world where Gen Q wouldn’t continue that tradition and it’s certainly a different — the love and the hate are very different, and yet the complicated feelings continue on. I’m excited to get into this first episode and see how we’ve all grown in the year plus since we were last — it’s been a year and a half, wow! — like a year and a half since Gen Q was last on and we were discussing our lives through the lens of this beautiful, beautiful show. Should we start?

Analyssa: Okay. Let’s get mad about The L Word.

Riese: Let’s get into it.

Drew: We begin the second season of this television program with—

Riese: Not at the airport.

Drew: Nope.

Analyssa: Not at the airport where everyone wanted it to start.

Drew: Nope.

Analyssa: But in fact, at the Bachelor mansion, basically.

Riese: Right, exactly.

Analyssa: I watch a lot of The Bachelor, that’s something about me. And I was like, this is the mansion, which by the way, you can rent that mansion on Airbnb.

Drew: I didn’t know that there was only one.

Analyssa: It’s like $10,000 a night or something.

Drew: Wow!

Analyssa: A fun idea.

Drew: Fascinating.

Riese: Well, I guess Showtime sprung for that.

Analyssa: Anyway, Showtime shelled out the $10,000 a night and that’s where we are.

Drew: Yeah, and like Sophie is greeting Dani and it is their rehearsal dinner for their weddings, so they didn’t get married—

Riese: Yikes!

Drew: … but they are still together and they are getting married and Dani’s dad gives a nice little speech and I was just like, okay, I guess this is how they chose to start this season.

Riese: Yeah. I was like, there’s no way this is going to be like, they’re not… There’s no way that this is going to be like they actually get married and then lived their lives. They didn’t set up all that drama for nothing. You know?

Drew: Yeah.

Riese: That was my thought, but I was also like, Dani’s dress is really nice.

Analyssa: She does look beautiful. Sophie said that and I was, okay, I agree, but why are you here? I don’t agree that you’re here but I agree that she looks beautiful. Notably, none of their friends are in the shot. We only see her dad and I was stressed.

Drew: Her dad who, last season, was pretty terrible.

Analyssa: Yes, but now he’s here and here to talk in a thick accent. He says, “Mi Yee-ha,” which I thought was insane, it’s fine. I’m going to try to let that one go because I think it’s going to come up a lot, but just know that that’s something I think about. Anyway, this is my least favorite thing in TV, actually, when something cuts to a thing and goes blank hours earlier or like blank days earlier.

Drew: Oh interesting, why?

Analyssa: That may be a personal problem, I don’t know.

Riese: I love it.

Analyssa: You’re like, unpack the drama for me. Show me.

Drew: Yeah. I also like it, so I’m curious why you don’t like that.

Analyssa: I don’t know. Instead of leading up to something dramatic and you have this sense of unease the whole time, you’re like, “Oh, something big is going to happen.” You know that something big has happened and then they drop you back.

Drew: Yeah.

Analyssa: And so, you’re just building to the thing. Anyway.

Drew: You don’t like the dramatic irony of it?

Analyssa: No.

Riese: It is a weird thing to think about in terms of like, this also is related to if you like spoilers or if you like to read the back of the book before you read the book, like the different experiences of viewing or reading something when you already know.

Analyssa: When you know what it’s building too. It’s like, okay, well, when do we get there? When do they line up? Anyway, and this episode delivers on kind of a fun, when do they line up, which I thought was fun. Anyway.

Drew: What’s interesting about this 15 hours earlier is we don’t go back — it’s not like we go back to Sophie and Dani. It’s this 15 hours earlier and it’s Shane and Tess—

Riese: And a dog.

Drew: And a dog going to a speakeasy in a vending machine.

Riese: To see Lena Waithe.

Analyssa: They’re basically going to… Have either of you been to Davey Wayne’s? They’re basically going to Davey Wayne’s.

Riese: No.

Analyssa: You enter through a refrigerator.

Riese: Oh, I have used a vending machine before though.

Drew: Wait, Riese. You’ve used the vending machine like a normal vending machine or like a speakeasy vending machine?

Riese: Yeah. I’ve gotten snacks from a vending machine, yeah.

Analyssa: Sure.

Drew: So you have personal experience as well to contribute.

Riese: I’m a person of vending machine experience. I just want to identify myself.

Analyssa: That’s important. Representation is so important.

Riese: It’s so important.

Drew: They’re greeted by Lena Waithe who’s playing a character named Eddy, first guest star.

Analyssa: Just out of the gate.

Riese: Yeah.

Drew: I want to talk about the fact that Eddy is introduced and introduces herself as saying that she’s the Black Shane, which is how Papi was introduced. It was like Papi is the Latina Shane. And I was just like, are we making zero progress? Are we just not… we’re just not going to make any progress in all of these decades. I’m just like, okay, and Tess works for both of them and they play poker and it’s like whatever.

Analyssa: Shane immediately flirts with the wrong person, which is like Shane’s whole bullshit. Well, that’s what you need to know.

Riese: It’s weird because Shane also just came back to LA.

Analyssa: Right. She’s been gone and she’s supposedly famous enough that Lena Waithe of her own volition lives in a completely different lesbian community than Shane does. At least with Papi, there was like, “Oh, the chart.”

Riese: Right.

Drew: Well, Alice found her.

Analyssa: Yeah. That’s how they figure out who she is and then she’s like, “Who the fuck are you guys? You guys aren’t in my orbit.”

Drew: Actually, we’re not just not making progress, we’re actually, it’s worse. Speaking of things that are making no progress and are also somehow worse because of that, Alice and Nat are still together and they’re dropping off kids and they’re immediately bickering and we’re just like, oh right, this couple that wasn’t fun to watch and decided to get back together are going to…

Riese: I found them fun.

Analyssa: I thought they were fun in the car. And also, they have new hairstyles or hairdos, which I think maybe makes them more spicy to me. They felt a little sassy. They felt like they had come out of the salon shiny haired and were like, “I’m going to get some quips off.” But then crucially, Gigi slides into the backseat and here’s what I have written in my notes: “Gigi, capital, I love you Gigi, I love you.” That’s all I have in mind.

Gigi: Morning.
Alice: Hey, Gigi. Hi.
Gigi: Wow. Happy to see you’re still super into public sex.
Alice: Is she kidding?

Drew: Gigi is my favorite person, not my favorite character on The L Word: Generation Q. Just like my favorite person. I love her so much.

Analyssa: Yeah, in the world perhaps. Also, Alice and Nat, just to roast them, to let Drew roast for one second, they do do this thing. So she gets in the back. She’s making jokes about their threesome, which I think is hilarious.

Nat: What do you want?
Gigi: To get back together. I’m kidding. I’m joking.

Drew: Love it.

Riese: Yes. I loved it.

Analyssa: As a person who’s been in a threesome, like the third person in a threesome, I do think that’s a funny joke to continue to make.

Drew: Oh my God! Wait! That happened since — the last time we were recording, I had never had a threesome and now I have had threesomes. Isn’t that beautiful?

Analyssa: There should be a year and a half between every season for that.

Drew: Wow.

Riese: Yes, so everyone can just talk up their sexual experiences.

Drew: Yeah, anyways. Continue.

Analyssa: Anyway, I think that’s funny to do, but more importantly, Alice and Nat kind of roast her for not having a life. Gigi, I should remind you, is the only person who remembered their kids whatever day it is. I didn’t care about the details, but like, she has a life. It’s being a responsible adult.

Riese: Well, they obviously want her to be around less, which I think, in my opinion, is because Nat does still have feelings for Gigi and Alice doesn’t want her around because of that. And so, they’re trying to find some other thing and they’re like, “Oh, Gigi’s around too much,” but she’s not. She literally delivered important information, looked hot, pulled jokes, called Nat out for still being into public sex, which was hilarious. And then she took two pieces of Alice’s gum, which is normal, and then she left. You know what I mean? There’s nothing to complain about there, but they find something to complain about because they have their own issues still.

Drew: In Nat’s defense, I would also still be in love with Gigi. Imagine being with Gigi and then no longer being with Gigi. That’d be really hard to get over.

Riese: Oh, and also we learned that Alice is writing a book.

Analyssa: Right.

Riese: About herself.

Analyssa: I forgot that they were even going to have car sex. Gigi entered the room and I was like, nothing else mattered to me, which Nat and Alice could use a little more of, in my opinion. Anyway, we are now meeting Carrie.

Riese: Oh my God.

Drew: Speaking of people I love!

Riese: I love her so much.

Analyssa: The long-awaited entrance of Carrie. I’m obsessed with her.

Carrie: I nicked your mailbox on the way up the driveway.
Tina: Honey, it’s not that bad.
Carrie: Listen, if you got some paint, I could touch it up for you, no problem.
Bette: Oh no, it’s okay.
Carrie: I’m so sorry. I really am.
Tina: See, it’s fine.
Carrie: Man, that hill’s a bitch.
Bette: Yeah. It can be.

Drew: I truly just — like, I’m going to be pretty critical about this episode, but if there’s two things that I’m not going to be critical about, it’s Gigi and it is Carrie as played by Rosie O’Donnell. Literally, every word that came out of her mouth delighted me so much that she ran into Bette’s mailbox.

Riese: Go girl!

Analyssa: Knock it over, it’s fine.

Drew: Her accent. She’s a public defender. I’m obsessed. I’m so happy that we’re getting this funny, hot butch Rosie O’Donnell on The L Word. It feels so beautiful and poetic and I love it so much. It’s everything to me. I love it.

Riese: I love it.

Analyssa: I also just, I delight in the fact that she is specifically designed to infuriate Bette. Everything she says, you’re like, Bette is going to hate that. And I was like, yes, I’m here for it.

Riese: Because like Bette versus Helena, okay, sure. That’s predictable enough. Bette versus Henry, who knows what happened there, but everyone hates that guy and no one wants him around, so whatever, but Bette versus Carrie, that is like, you are talking about two completely different lives for Tina to be doing. That said, Tina has how many lines, one? I still don’t have any idea what the dynamic is with Carrie, but at the same time, I also don’t care. I believe it and I buy it fully.

Analyssa: I like that Tina’s kind of sheepish. She’s in front of Bette and she’s like, I know that Carrie is kind of embarrassing, but I do love her. So like, just kind of ignoring that Bette is going to be a nightmare. It’s like when you introduce your friends to someone who you’re like, “You guys aren’t really going to love them, but too bad. I like them and I’m the one who has to kiss them.” So it’s fine.

Riese: Deal with it.

Analyssa: Deal with it.

Riese: Carrie has a Groupon.

Analyssa: Groupon got so much play in this.

Drew: So good.

Riese: For the meat buns.

Analyssa: I loved when Angie was like, “Did she make these? They’re beautiful.”

Riese: Angie she is so diplomatic, she obviously knows that her mom hates Carrie from the jump and she’s rising above all of it like a perfect angel.

Analyssa: This kid is doing so much emotional regulation in the room. She’s masking the mood so it’s chill. Anyway, Angie wants to meet her donor.

Drew: Yeah. She wants to meet Marcus Allenwood.

Riese: Who’s my daddy?

Analyssa: And Carrie’s like…

Carrie: You know, Angie, I did one of those DNA tests where they swab your mouth and you send it away and they tell you all about your ancestry, you know?
Angie: Yes.
Carrie: Turns out I’m 100% Irish, which was not a shock, but I found a whole lot of cousins down in Florida. All of them were so kind to me and one of them owns a jet ski store.

Riese: I sent off my kit in the mail. I sent my blood to, and then I was at West Palm Beach on a jet ski.

Drew: Yeah. I mean, I also think that like if, I mean, Angie doesn’t need to use that to find out anything about her dad because Bette knows him, but I do think that—

Riese: And also, she could watch season one of The L Word.

Drew: That’s true. Great point.

Riese: If she wanted to.

Drew: I just like, yeah, she needs to have somebody to tell her though that she needs to buy the DVDs because the music is different.

Riese: That’s true. She can buy the DVDs.

Drew: Yeah.

Analyssa: The box set is so important.

Riese: Oh. And also Carrie’s still stanning for Hillary, for Hillary Clinton. Adorable.

Analyssa: Crucial.

Drew: Yeah. So then going from Carrie who delights me so much, we go to a scene that in my notes, all I wrote for the entire scene was: “Dani and Sophie, blah, blah, boring, nothing new.”

Riese: Wow! You’re already bored? It just started.

Drew: No, it didn’t. There were eight whole episodes that I watched a year and a half ago and it’s the same dynamic.

Riese: We’re different people now.

Drew: What?

Analyssa: But this was 15 hours ago, Drew, please.

Riese: Yeah. Get in the mindset.

Analyssa: I do think Dani has gotten more beautiful between seasons. Is that just me?

Riese: I agree. She has.

Analyssa: She’s like radiant.

Drew: No, she’s gorgeous.

Analyssa: My only other note is, in all caps, “WHERE IS FINLEY?” That’s what I have.

Riese: Yeah, but Dani is trying to figure out their table arrangement two days before, but whatever it’s to be.

Analyssa: Doesn’t make sense also, Dani is trying to place for dad crucially, which is like, he’s just going—

Riese: Don’t your parents—

Analyssa: They have their own table, assuredly. Your dad doesn’t have a friend or uncle or random cousin that he invited? I felt like that was part of weddings.

Riese: Also, wasn’t he going to invite 100 of his coworkers?

Analyssa: Right, like he doesn’t… He’s like an important evil man. He doesn’t have people that have to come to the wedding as a favor or something? Whatever. Anyway.

Riese: Right. Evil people are never lonely.

Analyssa: You know who’s also not going to the wedding? Is Jose because he’s still married?

Drew: Yep. His storyline is also at the place where we left it.

Analyssa: Yeah, I was like, I guess this didn’t get wrapped up.

Drew: Nope.

Riese: Right. He’s back and Micah’s like, he’s saying like, it’s hard, we had to move back in together to end our marriage? Excuse me?

Analyssa: He had to give it a chance, but not a guy that—

Drew: I had no idea.

Analyssa: That’s big Grey’s Anatomy energy. I’m re-watching Grey’s Anatomy and the same thing happens in the first two seasons.

Riese: Oh really?

Drew: I’m just like… Look, I guess we’ll see where this goes. I’m really hoping that Micah moves on from this because it doesn’t seem…

Analyssa: Micah doesn’t seem pleased with the arrangement.

Drew: No.

Riese: No.

Analyssa: So that’s a positive sign for me. He’s like, wait, that seems wrong actually.

Drew: Yeah. I guess I think that a lot of my feelings about this first episode were just like, I feel like there were things that could have happened in this time off that I didn’t necessarily need to see. I have full faith that the rest of the season — like some of these storylines can go places that I’ll find interesting and fun or whatever. I guess I’m just confused by the… If the end goal is that Micah’s going to leave Jose, I don’t really know what we’re accomplishing by spending more time with Jose sort of treating Micah shitty.

Riese: Oh yeah, that’s true.

Drew: We already got that.

Analyssa: Right. There could have been a gap in… yeah.

Riese: That’s what the original would have done. They love to just chuck someone out.

Drew: That’s true.

Riese: Just chuck a tertiary character out into the sea and pretend like they were never there at all.

Drew: That’s true and that always bothered us.

Riese: But yeah, you’re right. This wasn’t necessary.

Analyssa: Yeah. Especially if it’s just going to blow up, which is where it feels like it’s headed.

Riese: Yeah. Also, I just felt bad because skipping the gym to have sex with somebody who is living with their husband to get a divorce, you should go to the gym.

Drew: Yeah. Well, it depends like what kind of sex you’re having because that could be—

Analyssa: I knew you were going to say that.

Drew: Sorry, it’s my primary form of exercise. So I need to defend that as a valid way of getting your heart rate up. Also, I have not had a lot of sex lately though because of the pandemic. So I’m really just not exercising at all.

Analyssa: Okay. We’re returning to my favorite set on this show, which is the set of The Alice Show.

Drew: Yay! I really like Alice and Sophie’s work dynamic.

Analyssa: I know. I think they’re so fun. I really think it’s sweet that Sophie’s getting her wedding suit from the show costume, like wardrobe, whatever. I don’t know. I just thought that was cute.

Drew: Yeah. It’s a good dynamic.

Riese: Yeah, that was cute.

Analyssa: It’s hard and kind of soul-sucking sometimes to work for rich bosses, but what’s nice is that sometimes working for a rich boss has fun kickbacks.

Drew: Correct.

Analyssa: I have a KitchenAid stand mixer that I got for free from my boss.

Riese: Wow.

Analyssa: Amazing.

Riese: Usually people have to get married if they want one of those.

Analyssa: I know. Now, I don’t have to put it on a future registry when I invite my evil corporation dad to my wedding.

Riese: Incredible.

Analyssa: Anyway, the point of this is that Alice misses Finley and so do I.

Riese: Oh, the segment. Alice has a new segment and she wants to hire a producer and this is where — I mean, you kind of saw this already, but Sophie appears to be not dead inside, but just not doing great, I think, mentally.

Drew: Absolutely.

Riese: Because last season, she wanted to be a producer, she was so gung-ho about it. And when Alice offers it to her, she’s politely excited, but she’s not half as excited as she would have been last, before all this stuff went down, so that’s kind of like that’s a little bit weird. And then, yeah, also the new guy can’t make coffee. So this is when we learn that Sophie’s solution to the Finley and Dani thing has been making Finley stay in Missouri.

Analyssa: Banished Finley to Kansas City. Like what? I needed to know, Drew, to your point of like, there’s so many things that we could have just left behind. What I actually needed was more information about what happened in the break. Did they call? I mean, I’m sure we’ll find out. Was there a phone call? How does Finley know that she’s been banished to Kansas city? She’s never allowed to come back? What are the rules?

Drew: The problem is that all the characters are at the exact same place sort of emotionally and the dynamics are at the same place.

Riese: But time has passed.

Drew: But time has passed. This was actually doubly confusing because you’re like, wait, what’s been happening these weeks, months, how long has it been and what has been happening during that period of time? There’s a few things specifically that will come up later where I really feel that where I’m like, “Wait, what?” But it’s The L Word and The L Word’s going to do what The L Word’s going to do.

Riese: Time is a flat circle in The L Word and we all know it.

Drew: It is what it is.

Riese: It is absolutely what it is.

Drew: But Alice is going to get Finley on the phone so maybe who knows? I will say that I think the lesson is if you cheat on your partner and you think you can just pretend like you didn’t, it might not work out for you if you are someone who experiences guilt.

Riese: Which Sophie clearly does.

Drew: And is also still in love with the person who you had the affair with clearly and it wasn’t just a casual thing.

Analyssa: Even without the being in love part, they worked together and were part of the friend group.

Drew: Yeah.

Analyssa: There’s a lot of threads here.

Drew: Yeah.

Riese: Yeah. And Finley was living with them also.

Drew: Yeah.

Analyssa: She was super present.

Drew: Yeah.

Riese: Yeah.

Analyssa: Finley was kind of like everyone’s emotional support lesbian last season. And then they were like, “I guess she’s gone. Bye.”

Riese: Yeah.

Analyssa: Anyway.

Riese: No, that would be so weird.

Drew: Well, that’s my other big question, is she talking to Micah? Is she talking to Dani?

Analyssa: Right.

Riese: Right.

Drew: Is she talking… Her and Sophie were clearly so close. Would Dani be like, “Oh, how’s Finley doing in Kansas City?” And then what would Sophie say?

Riese: And Sophie would be like, “Who?”

Drew: Right.

Riese: “Finley? Finley? I don’t know anyone by that name.”

Drew: Doesn’t seem like a good strategy.

Riese: Also, where does she run to in the airport? Cinnabon?

Drew: I think she ran to Dani. They went to Hawaii, but they didn’t get married. That was what I… That was the gap they filled in.

Riese: Oh God, I hate that.

Drew: Yeah. She ran, she smiled, she went, “It’s Dani. I don’t want to marry you right now.”

Riese: They look great together. They do. I just think that, first of all, there’s this really strong “you-were-too-young-to-be-getting-married” vibe radiating from both of them from the jump. I’m like, “Why are you? This is so…”

Drew: Yeah.

Analyssa: You don’t have to, you guys could just be together.

Riese: You don’t have to. Yeah, just be together and see how it works or doesn’t.

Drew: Or don’t be together.

Riese: Right.

Analyssa: I always think of that line in Broad City where Ilana’s like, “What am I, Lincoln, a child bride?”

Drew: Yeah.

Analyssa: “I’m 27.”

Drew: Yeah.

Analyssa: I think that’s so funny. Okay. Well, I want to move us onto a happier couple, which is Angie and Jordie.

Riese: Oh my God, they’re so cute.

Analyssa: Angie and Jordie are walking around talking about Angie’s horrible morning.

Drew: Just the cutest.

Riese: Yeah.

Analyssa: And Jordie feels really supportive and sweet, and I love that for them. And Angie also says that Bette needs a mood stabilizer, which is so funny, because then we cut to Bette at Dana’s—

Riese: Being insane.

Analyssa: Proving immediately that she needs a mood stabilizer.

Riese: And nothing against mood stabilizers.

Analyssa: No.

Riese: We’ve all been on them.

Analyssa: Who amongst us?

Riese: Whomst amongst us has not been on mood stabilizers?

Analyssa: You know who is keeping it chill? is Bette. She’s like, “I need a wife.”

Riese: Bette, famously undesirable, is wondering.

Analyssa: Famously undesirable Bette Porter is like, “Will I die alone?” And everyone’s like, “No.”

Riese: Right.

Analyssa: Stop cheating on people and you might not.

Drew: Yeah. Yeah.

Analyssa: I don’t know.

Riese: She says that being around Carrie and Tina is hard because they’re so together and she’s going to die alone because how is she ever going to meet someone who meets all of her standards, which are as follows. Number one is employed.

Drew: Mm-hmm (affirmative).

Riese: Number two, has children.

Drew: Mm-hmm (affirmative).

Riese: Number three was, what else was there?

Drew: She says that it’s not that she wants someone to be employed, she wants them to have a career that they’re as passionate about as she is, which is not true.

Riese: Which isn’t true.

Drew: Not true at all.

Analyssa: Okay, I did love that her friends were like, “No, that’s not what you want actually.”

Drew: Yeah.

Riese: You don’t.

Drew: Yeah, they immediately call her out. I really like these brunch — we have these in the first season and I like that we’re having them again, these brunch scenes with Bette and Shane and Alice. It’s really, I really like just getting to hang out with the original people and seeing their fun friendship dynamic.

Riese: Yeah. It’s also nice for me as an elder because I was in my twenties when they were in their twenties and now I’m in my late thirties and they’re in their early forties. So it’s relatable to see how your conversations — suddenly you’re sitting there talking about how to treat the other mom of the children, of the person you’re dating instead of Dana not knowing that you can squirt from having an orgasm.

Drew: Right. Gross.

Riese: Everyone’s really grown and changed.

Drew: Yeah.

Analyssa: Everyone’s grown and changed.

Riese: Yeah. And then Alice is like, “I know who to set you up with.”

Drew: Yeah. I immediately knew who it was and I was so excited.

Analyssa: Yes.

Riese: If only Bette was this excited.

Analyssa: Then Bette’s coat walks her into her next location.

Riese: Oh my God.

Analyssa: This coat.

Riese: It looks like she’s in the Oliver musical, about to steal someone’s bag.

Analyssa: There’s another Bette costume that is like, did we rip off the musical set in London in the 1800s? Why is this happening? We’ll talk about it later. But anyway, Bette’s coat.

Riese: “Lovely Ladies” is the vibe I got from that.

Analyssa: Really big vibes. But she’s the factory owner, is the thing in that.

Riese: Right.

Analyssa: She’s stomping around. Anyway, so she stomp, stomp, stomps up to talk to this man about a job.

Riese: Yeah. This purple guy.

Analyssa: Yes. This purple guy. They seem to be old enemies, which I think is kind of fun. Good for them.

Riese: Wasn’t he the husband in I Love Dick?

Drew: Yes. It is Griffin Dunne, who is also the star of Martin Scorsese’s After Hours and lots and lots of other things, but The L Word listeners will probably know him from I Love Dick, the Joey Soloway show.

Riese: He’s kind of short.

Drew: Is he?

Analyssa: He is kind of short. I mean, Bette is tall.

Riese: Right, she’s also wearing her vegan boots.

Analyssa: She’s got big boots and a big coat, so she looks bigger. The big thing is, this man wants Bette to bring in BIPOC artists.

Riese: And Bette does not.

Analyssa: And Bette’s like, “No.” I actually wrote in my notes, “Bette said signing bonuses for whites too.”

Riese: Yeah, she did.

Analyssa: That’s her big stipulation, she’s like, “I will get a signing bonus for all of my signs, including the white people.” And I was like, sure, girl, go off. Yeah.

Riese: Yeah.

Analyssa: Okay.

Drew: He says that artists of color are all the rage, which I fully believe that this kind of guy would say that.

Riese: Yeah.

Drew: But I felt like maybe the show agreed with it, it wasn’t a satire. Because people love to say stuff like that, right? They love to be like, “Oh, it’s trendy to do this.” And it’s like no. And the way they’re framing it is like, oh, he wants to get artists of color because they’re trendy, as opposed to like, oh, maybe your gallery has been racist all these years and people are starting to criticize you for that. It’s like this reframing of being like, “Oh, this is cool now.” And it’s like, no, that’s not what’s happening.

Riese: But also, I did feel like that was intentional, to be authentic to his character that he would say that. And he’s already made her a whole office?

Drew: Okay, but Bette takes jobs so quickly. Why does Bette always take jobs so quickly? This is always a thing where Bette—

Analyssa: Bette didn’t even look over the paperwork, nothing.

Drew: No. What?

Analyssa: There’s just, she’s like, “Sure.”

Drew: Do you remember when she was out to dinner with the person who broke her heart in college and then she was like, “Oh, you want to start a gallery together? Let’s do it.”

Analyssa: Ah, classic.

Riese: And before you know it they’re going “shake it, don’t make it” in this video filmed by Jenny Schecter on a next gen iPhone.

Drew: Yep. But she’s going to be working for him and I’m sure we’re going to get a lot of drama from that.

Riese: She’s going to make a bazillion dollars.

Analyssa: Yeah.

Riese: Luckily we’ve got the campaign debt taken care of.

Drew: Yeah.

Riese: I didn’t want that to be a storyline that was going to be boring.

Analyssa: I don’t want to talk about the campaign debt anymore.

Drew: No.

Analyssa: He said it even and I was like, let’s not talk about this. Yeah.

Drew: Yeah. Well, I’m sure that their dynamic is going to lead to some drama and some other drama that Alice is going to have, which she does not know she’s going to have is that her publisher is bringing in a new editor to work with her.

Analyssa: Oh, right.

Drew: And she’s like, “Oh my God, they love my book. They’re so excited, they’re going to send me this editor.” And I was like, “Oh, I’ve watched enough television to know this editor is not…

Riese: No.

Drew: Yeah, this is not going to go well.

Riese: No. Also, did she write that entire book in the last few months?

Analyssa: Wait, how long has it been?

Riese: Because I’ve been writing the same book for three years.

Drew: Wow. That’s pretty embarrassing, Riese, because Alice wrote it so much quicker.

Analyssa: Yeah. I was going to say, Riese, the thing is, if you were a talk show host, maybe you would be a lot faster.

Riese: Have more time?

Analyssa: Yeah, exactly.

Drew: Did Alice write the book or did someone who Alice hired write the book?

Analyssa: It sounds like Alice wrote the book.

Drew: Okay.

Riese: Yeah. And now they’re like, “You could use a light ghostwrite,” probably.

Drew: Okay.

Riese: So they’re going to hire that guy from Clueless.

Analyssa: Oh right.

Drew: Oh right. Oh right, oh… Yes. Cool. Well, I’m sure we’ll get to it in the future.

Analyssa: It’s all coming together now.

Drew: But right now, Alice wants Finley to come back. Sophie starts freaking out and then Sophie tells Alice about all the drama.

Sophie: Finley and I, we…
Alice: Did it?
Sophie: Yeah.
Alice: When did you? When did you guys?
Sophie: Just when we wrapped last season?
Alice: Oh. Fuck.
Sophie: Yeah. In the green room.
Alice: Oh.

Analyssa: First of all, I would never have admitted any of this to a boss because boundaries. But if I were to have admitted some of this to the boss, I would have stopped just short of, “We boned in the green room.”

Drew: Correct.

Analyssa: We could have gone, we just said, “We boned.” We didn’t have… She does it too like, “Actually, in the green room.” It’s like, no, no, no.

Riese: Yeah. I would accidentally tell the entire story for sure. I would be like, “I’m just going to say we hooked up,” and I’d be like, “but it would also be funny if I told them where we hooked up.”

Drew: I get that. Yeah.

Analyssa: Yeah.

Riese: And I did get a laugh and it did get a facial expression.

Analyssa: And yeah, it did play very well actually for me, so.

Riese: But this is probably the first person she told, right?

Analyssa: I think so. Well, aside from her sister, right?

Drew: Yeah.

Riese: Oh yeah. But the first person she’s told since.

Analyssa: Yeah. Since going to Hawaii, coming back, since everything fell apart.

Drew: Since Alice wrote an entire book.

Riese: Right.

Analyssa: Since Alice wrote a book.

Drew: Yeah.

Riese: Yeah. I wanted more from Alice here though.

Drew: Yeah.

Analyssa: Yeah, the other thing is, Alice loves gossip. She didn’t really even ask more questions.

Riese: Right. Yeah.

Analyssa: If I, as a light Alice type myself…

Riese: Alice minor.

Analyssa: I would have been like, “Oh, okay.”

Drew: Yes.

Analyssa: “More please.”

Riese: Right.

Analyssa: When did it start? How long had you guys been feeling this? What are the…

Riese: How did it end? Have you talked? All the questions we have.

Analyssa: Right. Alice was just like, “Don’t tell Dani,” basically.

Riese: Right.

Analyssa: “If you’re going to get married, don’t do it.”

Riese: Yeah.

Drew: Which I think is solid advice. But I would say the better advice is don’t be with Dani, don’t tell Dani and then don’t be… At this point, it’s been months. Tell Dani right after it happened if you wanted to stay with her. At this point, don’t tell Dani and don’t be with her anymore. But instead she decides to tell her at the rehearsal dinner. This whole, I was losing my mind. She decides to tell her at the rehearsal dinner and then all of a sudden, Maribel has told Micah and Micah is like—

Analyssa: They’re staring daggers at Sophie.

Drew: But I’m like, why didn’t she tell Micah earlier? Why is she telling at the rehearsal dinner?

Riese: Because it’s the rehearsal dinner. She’s like, “Oh my God, I can’t believe we’ve actually gotten this far.”

Analyssa: Yes. She’s literally procrastinating on telling her fiancé that she cheated on her. That is the whole thing is she’s like, “When is the last possible point? Oh shit, we’re at our rehearsal dinner. We’re going to get married tomorrow.” That was it to me basically.

Drew: Okay well, then she does the thing that I know bothers Riese a lot and it also bothers me where she goes, “I need to tell you something.”

Riese: Oh my God.

Drew: And then Dani goes, “What?”

Riese: “Is it the venue?”

Drew: And then she starts guessing. And then Sophie never says anything and then they just move on.

Riese: I hate it. I hate that.

Analyssa: I wrote in my notes that she distracted herself right out of finding any info.

Riese: Yeah.

Analyssa: She just is like, “Oh, is it the venue? Is it too fancy?” Which, yes it is, if we harken back to season one, what was going on when they were looking at venues.

Riese: Yes, it’s The Bachelor mansion.

Analyssa: This is much fancier, as Riese just reminded us. This is The Bachelor mansion.

Riese: $10,000 a night on Airbnb.

Analyssa: This is the United States’ premiere location for heterosexual romance. This is way too fancy.

Riese: Yes.

Analyssa: Anyway.

Riese: But she doesn’t even wait, she’s like, “It’s the venue.” And then she’s like, “We should go out tonight. Let’s go out tonight.”

Analyssa: Get wasted and it’ll be fun.

Riese: This only happens in TV. The bulldozing.

Drew: Yeah.

Riese: If some… I don’t think there’s ever a situation in real life where someone’s like, “I have to tell you something,” you’d be like, “It’s this. It’s this,” blah, blah, blah, blah, blah and… No.

Analyssa: And the other person also is not like, “No. Shh.”

Drew: I’m going to be generous. I’m going to be generous for a second, okay?

Riese: Okay.

Drew: And then we should move on before I get ungenerous real quick. I think there is a chance that Dani knows that something is wrong and does not want to know. I think that Dani, there’s… Sophie is being so weird this whole episode, I can’t believe, even though Dani and Sophie… Dani’s not maybe the most thoughtful partner, but I cannot imagine a world where Dani is not aware that there are problems.

Riese: Right.

Drew: So I can see Dani potentially being like, “I want to marry Sophie. I don’t want my dad to be proven right. I just need us to get married. Once we get married, everything will be okay. Once we get married, everything will be okay.” And just is in her own denial. I can see that being the case. And I’m going to, the way I do when I watched The L Word, take a theory that I have that is not really earned, and I will incorporate it as canon and I will move on so I can believe this show and enjoy the hot people having sex. Which I want to note, has not happened yet in this episode.

Analyssa: We all have the things that get us through the days and The L Word episodes, and this is Drew’s, and that’s beautiful.

Drew: Yeah.

Riese: At the end of last season, we did a whole post about our favorite ships and also people were putting their desired ships. And my number one desired ship, which I think makes sense on several narrative levels, and works for the whole dynamic would be for Micah and Maribel to get together. And I just want to say that I was getting vibes in this episode that they are perhaps closer than they were before. And that perhaps maybe in the future, they might be having sexuals.

Drew: I would love that. I’m really hoping for that.

Analyssa: Nothing brings two people together like plotting to out your sister as a cheater and break up the wedding of your friends.

Riese: Exactly.

Analyssa: They have some stuff to bond over.

Riese: Yeah.

Analyssa: Then Angie’s going to do the 23andMe. Neither of you have done a 23andMe?

Drew: Mm-mm (negative).

Riese: I did order one and then I didn’t turn it in.

Analyssa: Anyway, she’s having some feelings about whether she should take it or not, and then Bette comes in.

Drew: Yeah. And another dynamic I love, we’ve talked about that we love, is Bette and Angie. Even though it’s not maybe the healthiest parent-child dynamic, but I love watching it. It feels really real.

Riese: Yeah.

Drew: I love how the actors interact. It’s great.

Riese: I thought this was cute. She’s getting ready for a date and she’s asking Angie for advice.

Analyssa: And Bette treats her like an adult, which I like, because she is 17.

Riese: Yeah. Right.

Analyssa: So she’s like, “I’m going out. I don’t know if it’ll be fun.” Anyway.

Drew: Yeah.

Riese: Oh, she also says that the reason that they can’t introduce her to the donor is because they made that agreement with him that she wouldn’t reach out until she was 18. And if that’s true, then that’s legit. And also she said no on the genetic test because of the government collecting your data, which is also true.

Drew: Look, Bette can reach out to Marcus Allenwood and be like, “Angie’s 17, she’s asking questions. Obviously, if you want to wait until 18, you can, and this can… But I just wanted to throw it out there.” She could do that.

Riese: Oh, you know what she could do? She could call Marcus Allenwood and be like, “I’m the head of Professor Plum’s Art Gallery for BIPOC artists and I would love to give you a signing bonus in my giant glass office.”

Analyssa: That already has my name on it. I didn’t write the whole quote, so I don’t know what she says after, and I’m sure it was something serious and meaningful, but I did laugh at Bette Porter saying—

Bette: Well, for us as lesbians.

Riese: Oh yeah.

Analyssa: Just so seriously, “For us as lesbians.” I was like, “Bitch, all right.” I want to say it all the time now.

Riese: “For us as lesbians.”

Analyssa: Just about me, “for us as lesbians.”

Riese: :For us as lesbians, we just went through a lot in the nineties.”

Analyssa: Telling my roommates I don’t like what we had for dinner like, “For us as lesbians, I don’t want to order from that place.”

Drew: “For us as lesbians, I’m excited that Gigi’s in the next scene.” And she’s—

Analyssa: That’s the perfect use of that phrase.

Drew: She’s immediately game when she realizes she’s on a date with Bette, and Bette looks horrified by the realization of what’s happening.

Riese: Inexcusable.

Drew: Yeah. If I was accidentally on a date with Gigi, it would be the best day of my life.

Analyssa: Poorest reaction. The other thing though, there’s one quick interstitial of Shane getting into a car.

Riese: Oh, right. With the dog? Oh yeah, she was texting. She was texting with the wife who’s like, “I can’t wait to see you tonight,” or whatever.

Analyssa: She’s texting the woman she flirted with at the poker game.

Drew: Right.

Analyssa: And she just immediately, she’s like a heat-seeking missile for the wrong person to flirt with.

Drew: I do love it.

Analyssa: It’s shocking. Anyway, back to this date, which is most important. You’re so right that Bette has the wrong reaction to seeing Gigi.

Drew: Yeah, what?

Analyssa: She’s hot. Who cares? Whatever.

Riese: Drew, say the thing that you said to me about the hottest person in your friend group, remember?

Drew: Imagine if you were set up on a date with the hottest person in your friend group who you haven’t really had a chance to get to know, and then you’re just like, “Oh cool. Now this could be a thing.” That’s amazing.

Riese: That’s great.

Analyssa: I’ve been begging for my friend to set me up with the hottest person they know for years, and Bette just gets it handed to her after complaining about coffee.

Riese: Yeah.

Drew: Also, since when does Bette care about being entangled in The Chart? Like, “Oh, Alice was in a brief throuple with this person,” calm down Bette, what else is new?

Riese: She slept with Alice herself.

Drew: Yeah.

Analyssa: Right. Alice is one of her best friends and they used to date, so get over it.

Riese: And Bette is so rude.

Drew: Yeah.

Analyssa: And Gigi goes—

Gigi: So, you look amazing.
Bette: Oh.
Gigi: Is this is Tom Ford?
Bette: Thank you. Yes. Yeah.
Gigi: It’s hot.

Analyssa: These freaks are rooting for each other, it’s perfect.

Drew: They’re so good together.

Riese: I feel like we get to see Gigi’s personality in a way that we haven’t before. And notably that she’s really good at handling this situation with grace. I mean, the thing is, I think she’s hot and she knows she’s hot, but if you were less attractive than Gigi or less successful than Gigi and you walked up and your date was treating you like this, I would feel terrible about myself.

Analyssa: You would crumble. And Gigi is just kind of rolling with it and sort of batting it back. Look, Gigi kind of thinks it’s funny that Bette is upset. And I was like, good for you. She has unshakeable confidence.

Drew: As she should.

Analyssa: She’s like, “Let’s have fun. Let’s just do something,” as she should. As we all should really.

Drew: Yes.

Analyssa: We cut in the middle of this fun date to Alice and Nat. Well, Nat is watching TV—

Riese: SVU on her laptop. I was like, “Drew’s going to hate this.”

Drew: I lost my goddamn mind at this scene. Because okay, it’s true that I hate SVU. I hate cop shows, I hate SVU specifically. But that aside, a lot of people watch SVU, a lot of people I love watch SVU. It’s complicated. We can’t, we don’t need to get into it. Look, I wrote a whole essay about cop shows if you want to find it on autostraddle.com, you can. But what bothered me most about this, is Alice talking about SVU like it’s a new show that… What?

Analyssa: That’s what I mean.

Drew: When she’s like, she wants to hear about the hype. I’ve still seen episodes.

Riese: There’s no hype anymore.

Drew: I’ve seen several, I’ve seen so many episodes of Law & Order over the years because I’m a person and I exist in a space. But that aside, she’s been in a relationship with Nat for years, and Nat’s favorite show is SVU, but Alice is coming home and being like… What? Have you not been around your partner when she was watching her favorite show?

Analyssa: It doesn’t make any sense. Nat is squirreled away in their room watching SVU episodes while Alice works? It doesn’t make sense. It’s unhinged.

Drew: It annoyed me so much.

Analyssa: The other thing that annoyed me a lot is not falling asleep during Alice—

Riese: That was so fast.

Analyssa: Kissing her or whatever.

Drew: They’re so boring.

Analyssa: First of all, never seen someone fall asleep so fast in my life. But secondly, if you were sleepy enough to fall asleep while your partner is kissing you, why wouldn’t you have fallen asleep during SVU, which you’ve seen every episode of by the year 2021? I’m sorry, an unbelievable time to take a nap.

Riese: The amount of time it took her to fall asleep, you guys, Alice kissed her on the top of her chest right here and then conked out. Done. Done.

Drew: And here’s the thing, is that besides — It’s just making me feel like they’re boring and shouldn’t be together and wanting to just free them both to have more interesting relationships on this show. It also means that we still have not had a sex scene yet, which I know we’ve watched this whole episode so we know we’re going to get one and I’m grateful for that, and I’ll be very grateful when we get to discussing that and then the listeners will know that I’m grateful. But at this current moment when I was watching, I wrote in all caps in my notes, “Why hasn’t there been a sex scene yet?” And I was very frustrated.

Riese: Homophobia at its finest.

Analyssa: Back in the bar, Carrie and Tina have arrived.

Riese: Oh, so good. Oh my God.

Analyssa: Or the restaurant, wherever Gigi and Bette are having their dinner?

Riese: And so they come over to say hi to Gigi and Bette and it’s … Carrie is so perfect and cute.

Gigi: And you must be Carrie.
Carrie: Yes.
Gigi: I’ve heard so much about you.
Carrie: Oh, really? Anything Bette told you about me is subject to cross-examination. I’m kidding. I know we’re all part of the same team.
Gigi: What team is that?
Carrie: Yankees, all the way. 

Analyssa: This is a TV trope I do love, which is really hushed quickly, “My ex is coming over here. I need you to pretend that we’re having a good time.” Whatever it is, I’m in for that. And Gigi performs incredibly. She’s in fact even mean to Carrie, which is so fun to watch.

Gigi: Get the scallops, they are perfectly seared.
Carrie: Ooh, no. I got a texture thing with scallops, honey. No can do. I can’t…
Gigi: Well, save them for the grownups, right?

Analyssa: Bette is like letting them kind of make her feel shaken up. And Gigi’s like, “I don’t care about these people, I’ll roast them. Watch me.”

Drew: Just incredible. Incredible, incredible.

Riese: Almost like the perfect person.

Drew: Well, and I love both of these couples, I love them both together. We sort of go back and forth between seeing the two of them, the two different conversations once they’re at their separate areas or whatever. And it makes so much — Tina and Bette never really made sense to me, except that I was like, “Bette wants someone who’s a little bit boring because she wants to control the room.” But that never felt like growth for Bette. That’s why I love Bette and Jodi. I mean, I don’t love the way Bette treated Jodi, but in a world where Bette actually grew, Bette and Jodi would be my favorite couple on The L Word and maybe my favorite couple in TV history. I really loved Bette and Jodi theoretically, and the thing about Bette and Tina was it just always was like, Bette’s not pushing herself to grow at all. And with Tina, it was like, you’re just letting this person steamroll your life and you’re not really having it. So to watch the two of them, Bette and Gigi aren’t “together” together yet, but Tina and Carrie make so much sense and it’s so sweet and I really love them together. Then Bette and Gigi, I’m like, “Yes, this is who you should be with, Bette. You actually should want someone who has their own life and career and personality and can match you.”

Riese: And knows Tom Ford.

Drew: Yeah.

Riese: And also, she relates.

Analyssa: And roasts people for not liking scallops.

Riese: Yeah, also scallops. The texture of scallops is one of the best parts of scallops. Scallops are so good.

Drew: I love scallops.

Analyssa: Yeah, scallops are amazing. I do agree with her just demolishing Carrie about that. It’s fine, whatever.

Drew: For us, as lesbians, we love scallops.

Analyssa: For us, as lesbians, we love scallops.

Riese: Then she kisses Bette, right? She’s like, “Are we going to do this? We’re going to do this to make them jealous.” And that is hot because it keeps going. But also, when Tina and Carrie, when it goes back to them, Carrie’s like, “It’s okay, I’ll try the scallops. I know I’m just being close-minded. Let’s do it. Let’s have an adventure with the scallops.” And then Tina says that she thinks she’s beautiful and then, Carrie tears up. I also teared up.

Analyssa: It was so good.

Tina: I think you’re beautiful.
Carrie: Yeah?
Tina: Yeah.
Carrie: That’s a nice thing to say. I love you.
Tina: I love you, too.

Analyssa: It was really sweet.

Riese: It was so sweet.

Analyssa: The whole thing was just …  I wrote, “oh no, I love them.” I also love Carrie being like, “Tina, you are the most beautiful person here.” And Tina’s like, “Okay, but Gigi is very beautiful.” And Carrie’s like—

Carrie: Objectively, in like a common kind of way, I guess. I guess I could say so. But honey, she’s no you. Trust me on that one.

Analyssa: I thought all that was sweet. Also, Bette says to Gigi something like, “I would say that I love you.”

Riese: Yeah. She’s like, “I would say I love you, but I don’t know you well enough.”

Drew: Yeah. After the kiss, she says—

Bette: You’re very naughty.

Drew: I was dying. It was so good. I loved this the whole, yeah. Ooh. Everything that happened in there is everything that I love about The L Word and why I’m so happy that it’s back and we’re here talking about it.

And then the next scene, we get into some of the things that I don’t like as much. So they’re back seeing Eddy and Shane opens the door and says, “Ladies first,” letting Tess go. It has taken this deep into this first podcast episode for me to bring this up, but I would just like to remind everyone at home, that Tess is not canonically trans. Neither is Jordie, I guess, because Marja keeps insisting that and actually, I think was asked after my essay came out about it, and Marja was like, “We’re sticking to that and we’ll introduce more trans characters instead of making these two major trans actresses who are on the show as major characters trans.” Anyways, the reason I bring this up right now is because it felt like such a moment to me of a cis, slightly masc-of-center if we’re calling Shane that, lesbian would open the door for a femme trans woman and be like, “Ladies first.” It felt to me, so much of the way that they write Tess, I just am always like, “This little thing makes me think this is how a cis person would interact with a trans person who, they’re in this space.” So I just was like, do the writers, because they know Jamie’s trans even though they’re supposed to be writing her a cis, sometimes put things in? Like when Jamie is like, “Girls like us,” in the first season, these things where I’m just like, it doesn’t need to mean she’s trans, but I’m just a little bit like, this would make more sense. Anyways.

Riese: I thought that same thing when she said that, when she did the, “ladies first,” thing.

Drew: Yeah. I mean, there’s still no reason why she can’t be trans. She’s still trans canonically in my head. So is Jordie. Until she’s complaining about her period cramps, she’s still trans because again, just because the character isn’t like, “Taking my estrogen this morning,” doesn’t mean that they’re not trans. So all of the experiences that Tess has told me that she could be trans. You could be a trans person experiencing all these things. In fact, again, there are so many little things where I’m like, “This makes more sense if she’s trans.” So anyways, she’s still trans in my head. When a major trans lesbian is introduced on this show, I will go back and be like, “Fine. Tess isn’t trans.” But until then … anyways, moving on in this scene. So Shane tried to fuck Eddy’s wife.

Eddy: Shane, do you know why I started this poker game?
Shane: No.
Eddy: Because I wanted a place for Black lesbians to be able to come, kick it, and just vibe. Mainly because y’all take up a lot of space on WeHo. That Dina Shore shit is not for us and I don’t fuck with your music, it’s wack. What I wanted to do is sort of bring our worlds together, so by allowing you to come into our space, I assumed you’d be respectful of my house.
Shane: Ah, okay. I am. I think you lost me.
Eddy: You tried to fuck my wife.

Riese: Which I thought was actually, that was nice. It was nice to hear a Black masculine person be like, “Your scene and your whole deal is very white and I don’t feel comfortable there, so I created this whole place.” But yeah, I was thinking, because I don’t get it. Are we supposed to think that Eddy’s being unfair? Because she says that they are in an open relationship and also, the girl hit on Shane first.

Analyssa: And Shane says, “I didn’t know this was your wife.” Okay, fine. I don’t know. It just seemed… I agree that some of the white lesbian spaces, the music is wack. I feel it. Also though, yeah, it is just really confusing that she can fuck whoever she wants, but you come into this space being Shane, and that’s — what I’ve seen does not really say that that is what happens. So yeah, am I supposed to be on Eddy’s side or I’m supposed to be on Shane’s?

Drew: Right.

Riese: Or is this all just part two of the Dawn Denbo, Lover Cindy, Shane?

Drew: Right.

Analyssa: For me, as lesbians, I’ve never played at an underground poker game, and The L Word is telling me that it’s something that happens frequently.

Drew: Should we start this?

Analyssa: Do either of you have experience?

Riese: I’ve never played an above ground poker game.

Drew: I’ve played an above ground poker game, but never with a group of lesbians or lesbian-adjacent people. But sure, that would be fun.

Riese: For us, as lesbians — yeah, it’s illegal, though. So we would never do anything illegal.

Drew: Oh, I wasn’t even thinking of it like as it is on The L Word where it’s like, cool, and there’s a lot of money involved. I was just thinking we’d get together as friends and eat snacks.

Analyssa: Well, yeah, I sure don’t have the $10,000 it takes to buy into Eddy’s game. That’s just me speaking for me, not even as lesbians.

Riese: It’s always good to specify. Are you talking about us as lesbians or is it me for me?

Drew: Yeah.

Riese: The one thing I did like was when Shane was like, “Well, I would like my 10K back,” and she was like, “No, it’s reparations.” And Shane had to be like, “Okay.”

Analyssa: Shane’s like, “That’s fair. Sure.”

Riese: Yeah, Shane has the 10K. I saw this woman get off a private jet.

Drew: Yeah.

Riese: But also, if she has it to potentially lose in a poker game, then she obviously has it. But also, it’s just very confusing what we’re supposed to think. Maybe it is just like, “Yeah, she’s allowed to fuck who she wants, but did you really, you know?”

Analyssa: Yeah. I think there is a read of it where it’s like, “Shane, you don’t just get to swagger in and piss wherever you want, and the person that she chose just happens to be my wife, regardless of whether we’re in an open relationship. You can’t just walk in here and act like this is a new playground for you.” Which I think is maybe what the point was. “I invited you in as a guest and here you are.”

Drew: “You come to me this day of my lesbian poker game and—”

Analyssa: “You try to sleep with my wife?” Anyway. Also though, then Tess and Shane run out with “Don’t You Forget About Me,” basically, playing in the background, and I was like, “Did Tess just lose a job, though? What’s going on?”

Drew: Yeah. I don’t know. I like their dynamic, though.

Analyssa: I do, too.

Drew: It feels like Shane and Tess are going to be paired together even more this season and I love that. I love their dynamic. I think Kate and Jamie are really fun together and I really liked that.

Riese: I think they are together for the rest of the season because Kate did an interview, said that now her and Jamie are super close because they did almost all their scenes together. So I wonder where that might go.

Analyssa: That’s fun.

Drew: Sophie and Dani are at a club. They went out, based on how they had their conversation, but they’re out. Sophie tells Dani about the promotion, but then they’re talking about kids, and Sophie was going to get pregnant, and they’re having some drunken, “We’re at a nightclub after our rehearsal dinner, serious talks” as people do, traditionally.

Riese: That talk, though, was bananas.

Drew: Yeah.

Riese: How old are they? 25, 26? Even if they’re 30, here’s the thing: it doesn’t fucking make sense.

Drew: No, no.

Riese: If Sophie does want to get pregnant and have children and start a family, first of all, you have to take a million tests, you have to figure out what kind of donor you want, you have to do so many things after the wedding, so she probably wouldn’t be able to even start that process for a few months. When she starts the process, it could take her a really long time to even get pregnant. And I know that Tina devoted herself to it, so maybe that’s what we’re supposed to be thinking of. But also, I think Tina was supposed to be in her early thirties or something like that. Also, her and Beth already had established everything else in their lives and Bette was making a ton of money. But if she was offered a higher position, she should take that position, work it, and then take maternity leave and get a bigger paycheck for maternity leave. Not even taking the job because you are thinking about starting a family soon? That is literally just completely insane.

Drew: Yeah. Yeah.

Analyssa: Negotiate better benefits in your new job offer and figure out parental leave and … I’m nowhere near children, but they cost a lot of money. Why would you be like, “No, I’m just going to not take the higher paying job offer so that I can plan to have kids who will take up more money?”

Riese: On my insurance, my insurance covers $2,000 of fertility services. That’s it.

Drew: Wow.

Riese: And I have really good insurance. That’s the other thing. Is she going to quit her health insurance? She’s going to quit her health insurance?

Drew: Yeah. Even if Dani is the trans woman character, she’d still have to go out for estrogen for months and months and months. And it doesn’t even work very often, even when you go off your estrogen for months and months. So there’s really no way that the two of them together can get pregnant quickly. It’s just not in the cards. Though I would love that twist.

Riese: I was just like, “This is so stupid and contrived.” The point of it was Sophie saying she basically wants to be a stay at home mom, which means she could still work for the first few months of her pregnancy.

Analyssa: Right.

Drew: Yeah.

Riese: So stupid. Anyway, that annoyed me so much.

Analyssa: Right.

Drew: Then Dani makes the confession, which is that she had a sex dream about Bette and that she had a crush on Bette when she worked for her.

Riese: Yes, everyone did.

Drew: And she wants Sophie to know that before they get married. It’s a crush!

Riese: Who cares?

Drew: If my fiance was working for Bette Porter and did not have a crush on her, I would be concerned. I would be like, “I don’t know who you are. I can’t marry you.”

Riese: Yeah.

Analyssa: I feel like that’s day one conversation. Dani comes home from work and is like, “My boss is so hot,” and Sophie’s like, “Amazing. Are you in love with her?” And that’s where we go from there.

Drew: Yes.

Analyssa: And then, over the course of working on Bette’s failed mayoral campaign, you’d be like, “Today, we flirted.”

Riese: Right.

Analyssa: Unless you think it’s going to go somewhere, in which case, sure. But the way that they set it up, it was never going to go anywhere, but Dani has this very innocent and pure, “cheating is a deal breaker,” basis. Cheating can be a deal breaker and you can not be innocent, that’s not really what I mean. But she’s just got this doe-eyed like, “Is crushes cheating, maybe?”

Drew: Come on!

Riese: Everyone knows that Tasha thinks that thinking is cheating.

Drew: Yeah.

Analyssa: Yeah. Is thinking cheating? Dani’s here to take up that mantle.

Riese: They should be doing this around a campfire.

Drew: Yeah.

Riese: So then of course, Sophie does not, once again.

Drew: Yeah.

Analyssa: Well, okay. In Sophie’s defense here, your girlfriend being like, “I have something huge to tell you.” You’re like, “Okay, great. I also have something huge to tell you. It’s that I cheated on you.” Dani’s like, “I had a crush on my boss.”

Riese: And specifically, Bette Porter.

Analyssa: Right. “It never went anywhere.” Now what am I supposed to say?

Riese: I fucked Finley in the green room?

Analyssa: “Oh sick. I fucked Finley in the green room in my office. We’re even.”

Riese: Exactly, that’s so weird. “Similarly, to me, I actually had a crush on Finley. We had sex, but it was not a big deal. So like, let’s get married. I’m going to quit my job. So glad we had this talk.”

Drew: When your fiance says to you, right before you get married, “Cheating is a deal breaker,” and you cheated, no, you don’t tell her. What you do is you break off the wedding and you don’t marry this person who has different values than you. You broke the deal, so either you’re going to lie to this person and your entire marriage is going to be built on this lie, and it’s going to be found out because you had sex with someone who was in your social circle. Come on! At your place of work. You’ve told multiple people. Come on!

Analyssa: You’ve told Alice Pieszecki. I’m sorry, this is doomed.

Riese: It’s going to be on the chart. Yeah.

Drew: Okay, but here’s the thing. Here’s the thing that Sophie and Dani do well.

Riese: Have sex.

Drew: Have sex. And they do. And I want to reiterate from the first season that the intimacy coordinator of this show is the MVP. The sex scenes on the show, the only time I’ve ever seen sex scenes that are better than the Gen Q sex scenes is Vida. That is the only show I’ve ever seen, or even movie, the sex scenes on Gen Q are so well choreographed, so well done, so specific. I love them. Even when there are characters who I think should break up and not have sex or they can keep having sex after they break up. A classic.

Riese: Yeah, for sure. Oh my God, I wonder if that will happen.

Drew: I’m sure.

Analyssa: A time-honored tradition.

Drew: But no matter how I feel about the sex that’s happening, I always enjoy watching it.

Riese: Yeah. I thought that they did a great job at sexuals and I was like, “Good job. You’re still sexy. You still have that one thing in common. It’s the only thing you guys have in common so far that we’ve seen, which is that you like having sex with each other.” But I don’t know. You know what else, though? Just a side note. I’m glad they didn’t get into this because I hated it. But remember when Bette pushed that guy or whatever? What happened with that?

Drew: Yeah. I guess he didn’t press charges. Were there any charges to be pressed? I don’t know. I never really followed that storyline.

Riese: I know. I mean, the paps were all over it.

Drew: Yeah. Anyways, so we go to the wedding, where the wedding is happening. Sophie does not say, “We shouldn’t get married,” so there’s going to be a wedding and Tess is bartending because apparently, she’s the only bartender in LA, like Carmen was the only DJ. I’m like, “She’s your friend now. Why is she bartending?” Anyway, she’s bartending. And yeah.

Riese: And she says she lost her job.

Analyssa: Yes.

Drew: Right, right.

Riese: I felt like Bette’s outfit was designed for one purpose only, and it was so that, in the scene where she tells Alice and Nat that she kissed Gigi and they both go, “Gasp.” That scene was in the trailer, but you could only see Bette from behind. And because her dress involves fabrics from all ends of the earth, all assembled in some sort of patchwork designed for her body, she has a white thread, like a white ribbon that’s tied in the back of her dress. So in that clip in the trailer, it looks like they’re talking to a waitress or a server because it looks like she has an apron.

Analyssa: Oh, right.

Riese: But I forgot that also sometimes people wear different occupations as fashion.

Analyssa: See, that’s interesting that from the back, she looks like a waitress, because the front was very much giving, “Pirate overboard, shark bite at the bottom,” kind of situation.

Riese: Yeah. Talk like a pirate day, going to Long John Silvers.

Analyssa: And the top, the necktie situation.

Riese: Confusing.

Analyssa: I just don’t know what was going on there. Also, are you allowed to wear dark colors to weddings? I thought black was a no.

Riese: Really? I definitely wear black to weddings.

Drew: I haven’t been to enough weddings.

Analyssa: Are there rules on that? You can’t wear white.

Riese: I can’t wear white anywhere, it’s brutal. And also, I’m constantly thinking I’m about to get my period.

Drew: Well …

Riese: Yeah. So now, they find out that Bette and Gigi kissed.

Analyssa: Okay.

Drew: Yes.

Riese: Then this interesting thing—

Analyssa: Nat and Alice are way too invested in what Gigi is doing for people who were like, “Gigi doesn’t have a life, whatever.”

Drew: I was actually very surprised and I think, as it develops, we’re seeing hints of this. The whole Bette and Gigi being together, I don’t think Alice or Nat are actually going to be as comfortable with it as they think.

Riese: Right.

Drew: Nat and Alice are not characters on this show who are super fluid with all of that. They’re very jealous. So I think there’s going to be some drama. Yeah, absolutely. Of course, I want drama.

Riese: It was weird when Alice was like, “Well, I don’t know. It’s weird now. We’re all too connected.” And I’m like, “You actually were finger-fucked at the opera by Bette.”

Drew: I know.

Riese: You’re already connected.

Drew: It’s one of my favorite scenes.

Riese: Yes. Drew’s favorite sex scene.

Drew: I ship Alice and Bette.

Analyssa: You’re already fluid bonded.

Drew: Right.

Analyssa: Yeah. She set them up. “What do you mean that this is weird now that we’re more connected? You told me to go on a date!”

Drew: Yeah.

Analyssa: You think I’m not going to kiss?

Drew: I can see that, though. I can see Alice being like, “Oh my god this is perfect.” And then being like — that like totally checks out for me, that Alice would be like, “Actually, this is not what I wanted.” And then Nat is talking to a beautiful trans woman named Marissa. Well, at least the actress is trans…knowing Marja, maybe the character is cis. But, and then like, and she has a husband and a girlfriend and Alice is getting jealous. And I just wish that I just want, I don’t want jealousy. I just want people to be hot and have sex with lots of hot people.

Riese: I think that because when she went over and they were talking about, she was talking about the throuple or whatever, which is a weird, like opening conversation to have with somebody. And Alice was like, “It didn’t — you know, it ended poorly.” And Nat was like, “Well, no.” Like now she’s kind of defending the throuple as a concept, thank God. Because I think we all know it was a perfect concept and we loved it.

Drew: It was the best.

Riese: I got the feeling that Nat maybe liked that and is interested in opening up their relationship. And that’s why she was talking to that woman about it and was interested in it. And Alice is not picking up any of those vibes.

Drew: Yeah. I hope that’s where they go. And I hope Alice gets on board.

Analyssa: I do want to just consider the woman’s reality, which is that you meet a random person, Nat, at a wedding. How long does it take to get into like, “I’m here with my girlfriend and my boyfriend.” Probably not that long. Okay. Fine. And immediately Nat is like, still weird though. Like I’ve never introduced myself to a person and been like, “Who are you here with, as your dates?” Odd, but fine. And Nat goes, “Oh, that’s just like me, actually, let me tell you my thing,” and then Alice comes over and is like, “Our thing was bad.” It’s like, I’m just here to watch people get married. Actually I’m living my happy throuple, goodbye. It’s so crazy.

Drew: I assumed that Marissa was hitting on Nat and that’s how it got brought up. Like, I assumed that she actively was like, was like, “oh,” you know? And she was like, “yeah,” are you like, “are you here with anyone?” And she was like, “oh, like my girlfriend,” and she was like, “oh, I have a girlfriend too… and a husband, we are poly.” You know what I mean? Like that’s what I created a whole narrative for this trans woman in my mind. I’m like, that is, that is what I was expecting. And I was like, and so now she’s like introducing Nat to a world where they could all have sex and we could watch.

Analyssa: I know, I just wished that Marissa didn’t have to introduce Nat to a world — you know, sometimes it’s exhausting to introduce a Nat to a world.

Riese: But somewhere in here, Sophie texts Alice and asks her to come talk to her. And this again was another situation in which I wanted more classic Alice, you know…but she basically…

Analyssa: Maybe she’s grown and changed…

Riese: I don’t care for that.

Analyssa: My voice just cracked so deeply…

Riese: But she tells her, she didn’t tell her.

Drew: Yeah, I know.

Analyssa: Also like, Sophie needs a friend. Where is Sophie’s sister, where’s like…

Drew: Yeah. That’s part of it. That’s part of what happens when you fuck… You have to fuck your friends carefully. I really am a big fan of fucking your friends, but you have to do it carefully because you don’t want to end up in a situation where you don’t — I mean, that is one of the challenges though, right? Like if you’re having drama with fucking a friend and the brand is who you usually talk to about your drama, it does complicate things. It just does.

Analyssa: And the things that might complicate are your wedding.

Drew: Yeah, sure. Never happened to me personally. But in this case, it’s very much — and Micah, Micah and Maribel have just dropped it. Like what, why wouldn’t he tell his best friend Dani, about like, I just, that was so confusing to me. I was like…

Riese: Well, they were, because it’s not his place. It’s not his place to tell her. Sophie has to tell her…

Analyssa: But it was his place to make a scene at the rehearsal dinner?

Drew: If I know that my best friend, I’m also friends with my best friend’s long-time partner, and I love her, but I know that for my best friend that cheating is a deal breaker, and I find out, I would say to Sophie, “Hey, I know this about Dani, and it should come from you. It will devastate her if it comes from anyone but you. Or you need to end this and then no one has to find out. But if you plan on marrying this person, you need to tell her, or I will.” That’s what I would say…so.

Riese: I would just, as a person who is not into conflict would just let it be.

Drew: So when your best friend finds out that you knew — cause your best friend’s going to find out. And then they’re going to say to you. They’re going to be like, “Can you believe this?” I’m just not a good enough liar, maybe.

Riese: You’re right. No, that’s true. Yeah. I guess, I mean, they’re best friends? Yeah. If it was my best friend. Yeah. Because my loyalty would be to my best friend. The way they keep saying that for Dani, cheating is the deal breaker. If you’re calling it cheating already, then it probably is a deal breaker. Right? Like, isn’t cheating usually a deal breaker?

Drew: No, when I’ve been in monogamous relationships, cheating wasn’t a deal breaker for me. But maybe that’s why I no longer want to be in monogamous relationships because that’s not my relationship to monogamy, but I don’t know.

Riese: Right. I mean, I’ve forgiven people for cheating.

Analyssa: I think it’s more that like she is on record hard power pose stance of like, “if someone cheats on me, it’s over,” versus people who like what you’re saying, like in theory, most people would probably be like, “oh, that’s not good,” and maybe end it or maybe not. But they would like to have some, you know, reaction. She’s like, my reaction is always, end.

Riese: And, and also how could you even enjoy your wedding? Like if you know…

Drew: No, she’s not enjoying it, she looks miserable.

Riese: She looks miserable. She looks stressed out and miserable. She’s clearly bowled over by how hot Dani is on multiple occasions. She is stunned by how beautiful she is. But you don’t really see anything of her being head over heels for Dani’s personality. But you also see that in terms of her whole emotional reality is like, just like a tightly wound coil that — you can’t live your life like that. You’re going to quit your job to start going to get your fucking follicle count and then get tested? Whatever.

Analyssa: We didn’t talk about the really intense camera work at the rehearsal dinner when she realizes that Maribel and Micah have been discussing — it’s like, all over. She’s like, panicked.

Drew: So the thing that I knew would happen the whole time and I was waiting to happen, it does in fact happen.

Analyssa: Oh really?

Drew: Oh yeah. I mean, I’m happy it happened…

Riese: I was surprised.

Drew: It’s like, we’re leading up to a wedding. There’s a character who’s the point of all of the drama and isn’t in the episode yet.

Riese: And we know is in the season.

Drew: Yeah. We like, Finley wasn’t going to not be in the first episode. So I was waiting for it to happen. And then it did happen and it makes no sense. It’s so ridiculous.

Minister: When I look around, love…
Finley: Hello?…Oh, shit.

Drew: But, I’m happy it happened because now Finley’s there. The drama gets to all happen. And now we can move on to what the second season of the show will be, which who knows what it will be, because now all of these relationships have been exploded and we get to actually like move on and actually like…

Analyssa: This is like the…

Riese: It was so weird, though…

Analyssa: This was just a pre-episode for the rest of the season. It’s so bizarre that Finley shows up and goes “Hello?” into the wedding venue. And then she comes in and she’s like, “Oh, oh my God.” It’s like, where did she think she was going to go through the door to? She thought she was like walking into this big space. And she was going to open the door. Like Sophie was just sitting in a chair, waiting for her? It was so strange. Didn’t Alice say like the wedding, like whatever.

Riese: She’s in her plane clothes, you know, just like straight off, straight out of LAX, just right onto the runway of the wedding.

Drew: I’m hoping that Micah texted her and organized this whole thing because, one, that would answer the question of why Micah isn’t telling Dani and two, cause that would make Micah like a little bit of a sociopath. And that’d be interesting. I’d love that. But I mean, what an interesting direction for that character that we haven’t spent enough time with, you know? What a twist.

Riese: But we do know that Alice called…

Drew: Yeah, it was probably Alice…

Riese: Alice called and was like, “We miss you,” you know?

Drew: Yeah. And to be like, “Aren’t you going to be at Sophie’s wedding?” Like that’s on [blabbering] at this time and this place. And then Alice got the time wrong by an hour.

Riese: It was so silly.

Analyssa: Yeah, Finley thinks she’s busting in to catch Sophie getting her make-up done.

Riese: Yeah, and she was like, “oh shit.”

Analyssa: It’s like, nope. They’re just…

Riese: “Hi!”

Analyssa: It’s really happening. She’s in the aisle.

Finley: Oh boy. I, I love you. I think I’ve always loved you. And I just don’t want you to get married without all that information. And if you don’t feel the same way, I’ll leave right now. And you know, this would be a great story to tell or something but… I do love you, Soph. I’m pretty sure you love me too.”

Riese: And then we cut. Dude. Like you are burning a lot of bridges out at the same time, right now.

Analyssa: This is a big move.

Drew: Yeah. I mean all of Dani’s dad’s people, they run LA. I mean, what are you… You’re going to be canceled in this town.

Analyssa: All of the corporations Finley will never work in this town again. Yeah. It’s wild. I also wonder like, I’ve been to three weddings in my lifetime now. Not a lot of drama. They mostly go how they’re supposed to…

Riese: Oh yeah, this never happens in real life.

Analyssa: Sure. Bette and Alice and Shane have been to… well, Shane was the reason that the wedding didn’t happen. But, Bette and Alice have been to multiple weddings that are just disasters. You have to wonder if it’s their impact. They’re like planets that have bad gravitational pull towards weddings, bad stuff happens.

Riese: And everyone’s jaw drops. And Alice was like, “I think I know what this is about.” Also, did you see Tess gives Finley the look of death when she walks by, Tess was like…

Drew: Yeah.

Riese: So much money down the drain for the evil empire, you know?

Analyssa: Yeah. I haven’t seen the full wedding venue, but I assume that it’s just as extravagant as The Bachelor mansion, so it’s got to be expensive.

Riese: I did appreciate one thing. We all know that that kind of thing never happens at weddings. But another thing that has never happened at any wedding I’ve ever witnessed or heard about is someone asking the whole audience, like, “If you have any opposition to this union, speak now or forever hold your peace.” That doesn’t happen in real life. But it always happens in movies and TV shows, because that’s an excuse for the person who’s going to say, “Actually, I’m in love with you,” or whatever the fuck. So I was glad they didn’t do that. I was glad they didn’t do that.

Analyssa: I agree.

Drew: My favorite instance of this sort of wedding on TV is the first episode of the second season of Transparent because she goes through with the wedding, the wedding happens, no one interrupts it. She’s freaking out at the party, like, “I made a mistake,” and then she goes to the bathroom and has a quiet freakout where she’s like, “Can we not send him the document?” That to me is — that’s the version of this that felt really realistic to me. And also, it still felt really traumatic and still got across the same thing. I get that The L Word is more of a soap opera than — honestly, stuff like this doesn’t actually bother me this much. Like, the lead-up to justifying Dani and Sophie getting married still after everything we’ve seen; that bothered me. Sophie. I mean, Finley interrupting the wedding in this way. Like, yeah, it’s ridiculous. But like, that I can buy.

Riese: I will allow it, I will absolutely allow it. It was kind of fun.

Drew: I think it’s just the justification to get there. I get that you want these soapy things, but like don’t sacrifice who these characters are in order to get there because there are other ways to get there. And there could be a world where like, Finley was back in LA this whole time and they’d gotten to sort of like a good place where Sophie wasn’t freaking out all the time. It was just a thing they didn’t talk about. And Finley… You know what I mean? Like there’s so many different scenarios where like, it just made a little bit more sense. Micah doesn’t know, like Micah didn’t have to know… that thing thrown in there just made… just like over complicated it. And I just, it’s just these things where I’m like, I get that you want drama and soapy drama and that’s fun. I love it. That’s why I’m watching The L Word. I’m not expecting like, you know, whatever, but I just don’t understand when a character is sacrificed in order to get there.

Riese: Well, I enjoyed it.

Drew: I enjoyed it. I mean, I enjoyed it. It’s not about enjoyment. It’s just, yeah. It’s just like, I get frustrated. Here’s the thing. Okay. So I generally watch porn that has plot and sometimes I’ll be watching it and I’ll be like, “I wish I could just make a few script notes, like a few tweaks.” But like, I get that it’s porn, the point is not that it has like, a perfect script, but sometimes I am like, if you just, you just threw this line, just justified it this way. This would work better for me. So that’s how I feel about The L Word. Like I know the, there are points, but not that the point is just sex and hotness on The L Word. There are other, there’s the fashion, there’s lots of other… There’s like the fun soapy drama. But I do still feel this thing where I’m like, “there’s just like a few tweaks I want to make” and it drives me nuts that I’m just like — it’s just, all the stuff that’s so good and so fun, and there is so much being introduced. I’m really excited for the rest of the season. And like, I mean, even if it was just the scenes with Rosie O’Donnell, I would be thrilled. There’s so much that I really like. And it’s these little things that I’m like, these little things, both politically and narratively, that just drive me nuts. But it’s okay. I’m happy to be here with you both.

Analyssa: I take my brain right out my head. I say, these people are hot, and they’re making mistakes, and I love it.

Riese: That’s the tagline: “these people are hot and they’re making mistakes”. But yeah, I’m excited for the season. I’m curious about Bette and Gigi. Dani is obviously going to spiral, this is not going to be, I don’t know what’s going to happen there, but it’s going to be messy. I’m not super interested in what’s happening with Shane right now. I don’t, I still feel the dog is an unnecessary plot device. And I hope that they give it up, even though I love dogs. I have really good feelings about Micah possibly hooking up with Maribel. I said that the whitest way possible. So in case anyone is curious about what race I am, now you know. I’m excited about that. And I’m excited about Rosie O’Donnell. Yeah.

Analyssa: I think that they got some really fun dialogue off in this episode. And that is what I was thrilled about. There’s just a lot of people being snappy, people were on their game, which I always like.

Drew: Here’s the thing, is that I think when it was announced that there was going to be a spinoff of The L Word, I was like, “oh, a show about all the things we love about The L Word, a show about lesbians and lesbian community… but the things that drove us nuts about The L Word are going to go away.” And I think what I just need to accept is that actually, this is what The L Word is, if it didn’t have these other things, then it wouldn’t be The L Word. And then what would be the fun in that?

Analyssa: I feel similarly. And I’ll encourage you to be excited about this. For me, as a lesbian… watching — I didn’t watch The L Word live, or anytime near it, it was way later. And so now I feel connected to a community, a specific one for sure, but like a niche one, for sure, but a specific-for-us-as-lesbians community of people who were getting, who loved The L Word, but were still getting mad about The L Word, so I’m doing it also. So, that is kind of fun.

Drew: For us as lesbians, it’s nice to have one show that we all watch and we all yell at and that’s really nice.

Analyssa: And we get mad about, it’s fine.

Drew: Yeah. I mean, for the listener at home, we’re recording this a little bit in advance and we have screeners for more episodes and we didn’t watch them because we want to be able to speculate properly. So when we get off of this podcast recording, I’m going to watch the next episode. Don’t get me wrong. I am obsessed with this show. I believe in the complexity of art and that you can criticize something and also love it dearly. That is like my religion, so I’m very excited to keep watching and to keep watching with both of you and to keep discussing.

Analyssa: I’m so happy to be back. It’s been so long. What was that…wasn’t that the tagline for Gen Q?

Drew: Yeah.

Analyssa: “Hello again?”

Riese: Yeah. “Hello again.”

Analyssa: Oh, well, we got there eventually.

Riese: That should be the name of our podcast. “Hello, again.”

Drew: I’m really hoping that Alice gets wild because that’s Alice at her best and she doesn’t always do that, so I’m really hoping that some polyamory happens for them. And I hope every season they get in — if Nat and Alice are going to be together for the rest of Gen Q’s eight season run, I hope that every season Nat and Alice are still together, but they explore polyamory in a new way. And then at the end of the season, they’re like, “That didn’t work for us! We’re boring,” but we get to watch it happen. That’s my dream. And we can all have dreams, right?

Riese: We can all have dreams, you know…

Drew: We as lesbians can all have dreams.

Riese: Like, you know, Dani had a dream about Bette Porter.

Drew: And I’m thinking about it right now.

Riese: All right. I guess that’s a wrap.

Lauren: Thank you so much for listening to this episode of To L and Back Generation Q! One of two podcasts brought to you by Autostraddle.com. You can follow us on Instagram and Twitter @tolandback. You can also email us at tolandbackcast@gmail.com. Don’t forget, we also have a hotline! Yes, it still exists! Leave a message, give us a piece of your mind! You can reach us at 971-217-6130! We also have merch! Head over to store.autostraddle.com. There are “Bette Porter For President” t-shirts,  To L and Back stickers, and lots of other simply iconic Autostraddle merchandise. Our theme song is by the talented Be Steadwell. Our brand new TLAB Generation Q logo is by the incredible Jacqi Ko! Jacqi is so, so talented and you should definitely go check out her work, I’ve linked her website and socials in the show notes! And let us know if you want us to make stickers of the new logo, because I think the new logo looks pretty sick! This episode was produced, edited and mixed by ME, Lauren Klein, you can find me on Instagram @laurentaylorklein and on Twitter @ltklein. You can follow Drew everywhere @draw_gregory. You can follow Analyssa on Instragram @analocaa and on Twitter @analoca_. And you can follow the legendary Riese Bernard everywhere @autowin. Autostraddle is @autostraddle. And of course, the reason we are all here…. Autostraddle.com. Ok, so to end this episode, we are going to do something a little different. Usually we end with a random L word that has little significance to the episode we just recapped, which obviously was great, but for this season we are mixing it up! We are going to bring a little bit more intention to our L words. So Riese, why don’t you explain how this is going to work!

Riese: So at the end of the episode, instead of all saying an L word at the same time, we are just going to say a specific L word that we choose, because it is specifically related to how we feel about the episode in some manner. And today we’re going to use L words that say how we feel about the season upcoming.

Analyssa: An L word that is my hope for this season, and mine is “lunacy.”

Drew: My L word for how I’m feeling about this episode and feeling about this season is “lustful,” because I’ve been inside for a long time… and, not that I was not horny and didn’t want to watch people have sex on TV before the pandemic, but you know, still want to see it. And you know what? I think I will. And that’s what I love about The L Word.

Riese: Mine is lactose intolerant, for obvious reasons.

Drew: Yeah, of course.

Riese: Okay. Love you guys, bye!

Analyssa: Going to go hang out with my friends. Goodbye!

Drew: Bye!


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analyssa

Analyssa is a co-host of the To L and Back podcast: Gen Q edition. She lives in LA, works at a TV studio, and can often be found binge-watching an ABC drama from 2008. You can follow her on Twitter, Instagram, or her social media of choice, Letterboxd.

Analyssa has written 14 articles for us.

4 Comments

  1. YES!!! I’m so happy this show is back because it means the best podcast is back! Carrie absolutely rules and as someone with similar taste issues, I totally get her thing with the scallops. Protect Carrie from any Lobster Dinner situation!

  2. This line made me cackle — “In Nat’s defense, I would also still be in love with Gigi. Imagine being with Gigi and then no longer being with Gigi. That’d be really hard to get over.”

    Also, Drew, your co-hosts may not agree but I am all for your impassioned insistence that the story *make sense*. The L Word’s narrative and character choices need to be critiqued because of the show’s outsized influence, period. Thank you for sharing your thoughts!

  3. I love that this podcast is back for Season 2!

    Also, unpopular opinion but I don’t like Sophie. Not sure why exactly but she grates my nerves. I feel like we are supposed to feel bad for her and I just don’t.

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