Things I Read That I Love #265: He Was Never Imaginary, He Just Had Bad Timing

HELLO and welcome to the 265th installment of Things I Read That I Love, wherein I share with you some of the longer-form journalism/essays I’ve read recently so that you can read them too and we can all know more about blood spatter analysis! This “column” is less feminist/queer focused than the rest of the site because when something is feminist/queer focused, I put it on the rest of the site. Here is where the other things are.

The title of this feature is inspired by the title of Emily Gould’s tumblr, Things I Ate That I Love.

The ‘Sex Cult’ That Preached Empowerment, by Vanessa Grigoriadis for The New York Times Magazine, June 2018

I obviously, because of who I am and what I’m about, read a lot about this situation already — this story, it seems, was commissioned before those recent arrests were made, and Grigoriadis got access to some pretty interesting stuff, especially when Allison Mack espouses her nonsense belief system.

Blood Will Tell Part 2, by Pamela Coloff for The New York Times, May 2018

This isn’t the first piece we’ve had in TIRTL about the dangers of putting too much trust in certain elements of forensic science. This is a follow-up to a piece I posted last time, and it’s

Maybe She Had So Much Money She Just Lost Track of It, by Jessica Pressler for The Cut, May 2018

Anna Delvey did a lot of expensive things with money she didn’t actually have. An interesting companion read: The Fiends and the Folk Heroes of Grifter Season, by Jia Tolentino for The New Yorker.

Scenes From A Florida True Crime Investigation, by Cutter Wood for Crime Reads, May 2018

“You’ve got grand theft auto, driving without a license, resisting arrest, arson, violation of parole, maybe insurance fraud. But there’s just no body. It’s six crimes in search of a murder.”

Justin Bieber: God, Girls and Boatloads of Swag, by Vanessa Grigoriadis for Rolling Stone, March 2011

A true classic of the celebrity profile genre.

Caitlyn Jenner’s Quest for Acceptance, By Diana Tourjée for Broadly, May 2018

I clicked this not knowing if I’d make it past the third sentence and ended up fully roped in. Damn. She’s been doing a lot more than I thought — and she might have a point that it’s better for her to be at the GOP parties exposing those assholes to trans issues than it would be for her to join the rest of us in continuing to yell at them across a canyon. It’s difficult I think to change somebody’s political party once they pass a certain age… reading this I’m not sure that all the rage directed at her is all that useful, ultimately. But I guess I say that from a place of weariness regarding anger at celebrities in general.

A Journey Into the Righteous, Risk-Averse World of Faith-Based Films, by Joanna Rothkopf for The Muse, June 2018

As the genre enters another fruitful era, revitalized by Quaid’s breakthrough hit, it’s even more apparent that a majority of popular Christian films are so neatly packaged, the stories so precisely tapered and inoffensive to a conservative demographic, that no one is being emotionally or intellectually pushed. But that’s the hardest question, isn’t it? How do you make a religious film original and daring without alienating its practitioners?

When ‘The Real World’ Gave Up on Reality, by Rebecca Schuman for Longreads, May 2018

Early seasons of The Real World are some of my favorite seasons of television, ever. For me, the shift happened in the 2002 Vegas season, although Hawaii was the beginning of the end for sure.

The Real Story of South Florida Rapper XXXTentacion, by Tarpley Hitt for The Miami New-Times, June 2018

It is wild that this guy’s music took off in part because of the allegations of domestic violence against him. This world.

The Size Conversation, by the Racked Staff

“The conversation around clothes above a size 12 and the people who wear them has become more mainstream, but the contents of the discussion often feel divorced from the real issues,” reads the introduction to The Size Conversation, a multi-part series on Racked. I’ve read Size, by the Numbers (by Hilary George-Parkin) and When Brands Use Plus-Size Models and Don’t Make Plus-Size Clothes and they were both really interesting and I bet the rest of the series is too!

Oral History: In 1985 Snuffy Shocked Sesame Street, by Jennifer M Wood for Mental Floss, November 2015

Just some more nostalgia for you.

Hayley Kiyoko: American Teen Lesbian Hearthrob, by Riese Bernard for Nylon Magazine, June 2018

Just in case you didn’t see this one already!

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Marie Lyn Bernard, aka Riese, is an award-winning writer, blogger, journalist, fictionist, copywriter, video-maker and aspiring cyber-performance artist who grew up in the midwest, lost her mind in New York City and is currently making it work in California. Her work has appeared in nine books including "The Bigger the Better, The Tighter The Sweater: 21 Funny Women on Beauty, Body Image and The Hazards of Being Female," "Dirty Girls," and "The Best American Erotica of 2007," magazines including Nylon, Marie Claire, GO, Curve, Interlude, and CollegeBound, and all over the web including, Jezebel, Queerty, Emily Books and OurChart (RIP). She was the recapper for The L Word Online and host of Showtime’s Lezberado and her personal blog has earned many dubious honors including Best Personal Blog 2008. Riese has spoken about blogging, community-building, feminism, cyberculture and sexuality at places like BlogHer, Yale, New York University, The University of Chicago and The Museum of Sex. A graduate of the University of Michigan, Interlochen Arts Academy and The Olive Garden's week-long training intensive; she enjoys eating foods, having big ideas, reading books & talking to her stuffed dog, Tinkerbell. Also, she's Jewish. Follow her smokin’ hot adventures on twitter. Contact: riese[at]

Riese has written 2893 articles for us.


  1. I read that Anna Delvey story earlier this week(may have been last Friday) and it’s wild how much she was able get away with. It’s fascinating how easily some of these rich people lost track of all that money when the right person comes speaking the right words.

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